Everything is awesome/Everything is cool when you’re Dan Rengering/Everythings is awesome/With this pendulum swing. Sorry, sorry. I just thought of that song parody while watching the episode, and it has been stuck in my head ever since. And now you all must suffer with me! HA HA HA!
We actually begin with what seems to be a normal day on Tiva beach. But then, suddenly, heads turn towards the ocean. Quickly, we see what the commotion is: From the depths of the sea rises a submarine, the crown jewel of the Fijian navy. From behind our contestants comes a troupe of native dancers singing and celebration, while a small plane flies overhead. Eight small objects fall from this plane: It’s the remaining contestants, skydiving to they new camp! Fireworks are launched from the deck of the submarine, narrowly missing the skydiving contestants while creating a depiction of this season’s logo in the sky! And, as a bonus, Jeff Probst walks shirtless up the beach, carrying the feast, signifying that the merge is here.
Sorry, sorry, I was channeling a universe where the show still CARED about such a momentous occasion. No, it’s just the other tribes arriving by damn boats again, not even tree mail or a scramble at camp to shake things up, however slightly. Look, I get why they do this. With thirteen people, you need a lot of time to set up the dynamics, and having an intricate merge scenario makes that difficult. However, the loss of spectacle is definitely a loss for the show, since now the merge doesn’t carry the grandeur it should, and is instead just another event, albeit one with pretty new buffs. So, how would I solve the problem of needing to set up the dynamics of thirteen people while still taking time for a spectacle of a merge? Here’s an idea: HAVE FEWER PEOPLE AT THE FREAKING MERGE! Even WITH no time devoted to the act of the merge itself, I still have difficulty following what’s going on. I get wanting to give dynamic characters a better shot at the merge, but when you lose comprehension as a result, it’s too big a loss, I say. Never earlier than twelve, and mostly at ten or later, I say.
One interesting note: In the (admittedly very few) seasons where we’ve had two tribes split into three before the merge, this is the first time where the merge takes place at the newly created tribe camp, as opposed to one of the original ones.
Carl initially seems like he’ll drag things into strategy talk very quickly, noting that Elizabeth annoys him and he wants her out. However, that’s only second priority in Carl’s mind. The first? Beer. Sweet, dehydrating, totally not the thing you want on a deserted island beer. Glad to see Carl’s got his priorities in check. Our actual strategy talk first comes from Johnny Mundo, who initially sets up how all of this is fun and smiles, until noting that there’s deception beneath it. Getting more into where he stands, Johnny Mundo states that while he LIKES Christian, and considers him a “Brochacho”, he’s staying “Goliath Strong”, and with a 7-6 majority, has no reason to flip. Ok, bring in the “Ironic Blindside” Counter. It’s probably not happening this episode, but soon! Gabby, meanwhile, brings talk to idols/advantages, noting that merge feasts are the appropriate time for new ones to be introduced. I’m particularly pleased that it’s Gabby who brings this up at this point, not only because she’s probably my favorite person left, but because she’s female. If you’ll recall the conversation on the Goliath Tribe in the first episode, women on “Survivor” rarely are the ones to find idols/advantages. That Gabby is taking steps to try and correct this trend pleases me. Gabby is even genre-savvy, noting that their individual napkin rings are color coded to fit with the merge, and thus a likely hiding spot. True, her search bears no fruit, but the idea was good, and Gabby could hardly investigate everyone’s napkin ring without drawing attention. Besides, I don’t think this plot thread is over yet, if the close up on the merge placard after this scene is any indication.
If we can’t get a spectacular merge, we at least get to actually SEE the naming of the tribe this time around. Elizabeth apparently attempted to learn some Fijian before heading out, coming across the world “Kalokalo”, meaning “star”. Hmm, decently thematically appropriate, cool sounding, and pays tribute to the host country! Such a cool name the likes of which we’ve not seen in a while must make Carl angry! Drunk, he spills to Dan that he wants Elizabeth out, something Dan squirrels away for later. Good for him. By the way, Dan, enjoy that compliment, it’s one of very few you’ll be getting this episode.
Now, it is time for that happiest of reunions: The Mason-Dixon alliance! Yes, everyone’s favorite bromance this side of Rodney and Joaquin (“Survivor Worlds Apart”) is back together, and seemingly stronger than ever. Time apart has allowed both Christian and Nick to build separate bonds they might unite to save their collective butts. Plus, Nick has “Actionable Intelligence” on one of Dan’s idols, meaning Christian’s reconnaissance from a few episodes ago was relatively meaningless. Good for them playing strategically, though.
Less heartwarming is the return of the romance between Dan and Kara. Dan, proving the brain trust that he is, immediately informs Kara of his second idol. To be fair, he’s at least not hiding it in his jacket this time (that we know of) but the guy is just too trusting too quickly, and just seems overall to have no idea what he’s doing.
But enough with the pairings, let’s get to the big stuff. The old Goliaths, of course, bond back together, Angelina hugging things out with Johnny Mundo, Dan, and Kara. At first this seems short-sighted, not including Alec and all, and seems like it might be setting him up to go. While Jabeni voting out Natalie was easily understood, less forgivable was the blindside of Natalia. But no, Alec’s just late to the hug party. Even so, he’s still not fully on-board with the “Goliath Strong” thing, noting that it can’t last forever. Now, when I bash Alec later on in this blog (and, most likely, many episodes to come), understand that it’s not because his reasoning isn’t strategically sound. It absolutely is. He’s right in saying that for most people, it’s not smart to stick “Goliath Strong”, since eventually, you’ll need those votes, and those on the bottom of the Goliaths will not be satisfied with seventh or sixth or what have you. No, Alec’s flaw is in the EXECUTION of this plan. You want to bond and build side-alliances with the former Davids, sure, but do it on the down-low. Instead, when Alec already has suspicion cast upon him for the blindside of Natalia, he doubles down by very openly talking to various Davids, a fact that does not go unnoticed. For the moment, though, this threat seems to be overlooked, but don’t be surprised if it comes back later in the season.
The former Goliaths try to decide who to target first, eventually going with the tried-and-true strategy of “Vote out the person who annoys everyone/can’t be trusted”, basically building consensus amongst everyone, not just the core alliance. It is the weird catch-22 of thirteen person merges that, while seemingly the perfect time to blindside a major threat, the tribe goes with an easy consensus boot, most likely due to being an easy, solid person to rally around, as opposed to the chaos of trying to organize a narrow vote on a large tribe. See McQuillen, Kass on “Survivor Cambodia” or Noble, Chris on “Survivor Ghost Island” for prominent examples of this phenomenon. Angelina talks about his being a “good time for a blindside”, but throws out no names. Yet.
And now we come to our most intriguing alliance. They’ll be nicknamed “Strike Team” by Christian, but I prefer “The Island of Misfit Toys” (though I can understand why they wouldn’t go for that name), since every member of the alliance is a misfit in some way. Alec, Mike, and Alison (two members outside the core Goliath alliance, the guy considered untrustworthy by the same), agree to work with some Davids, but more subtly. Alison has a connection with Gabby, who in turn would bring in Christian (both nerds), while Mike would bring in Nick, the guy most likely voted out first if Pat isn’t medically evacuated. It’s revenge of the underdogs and I love it! True, not everyone in the group is super-interesting. Alec is basically a somehow-blander Jon Misch (“Survivor San Juan del Sur), and while I think Alison has potential as a strategist, she has yet to really show it. Still, everyone seems on board, and I would be pleased as punch if this alliance were to dominate the game.
To further cement the idea that Elizabeth is out of the loop, she plays like the Davids all plan to stick together, which does not seem to be the case at this point in time. Nevertheless, she gives a good play for the position she thinks everyone is in. After Dan and Kara are about as good at hiding their showmance as Figgy and Taylor were on “Survivor Millennials vs. Gen-X” (read “Not at all”), she figures this can be used against them. Rallying her former tribemates against this big threat, she pegs Alec as a possible flip, again due to the Natalia vote. Even Alec, though, is not stupid enough to keep that to himself, and informs Dan. Dan takes it well. And by that, I mean he throws a tantrum that gets even his lady-love Kara looking skeptical. I can understand Dan being upset by being targeted. Anyone would be. But it’s when he argues that he’s not a threat that I have to roll my eyes. Yes, Dan, Johnny Mundo is obviously physically stronger than you, but it’s not just about physical strength on “Survivor”. Smarts play a big part as well, and while you aren’t all that smart, you give the PERCEPTION that you are. Note how Alec referred to you as a “strategic threat” when talking with Elizabeth despite your obvious flaunting of a dangerous showmance. Conversely, Johnny Mundo comes off as a wrestler, a profession not exactly known for being a brain trust. Plus, and I need to repeat myself here, YOU FLAUNTED A SHOWMANCE, WHICH WILL ALWAYS PUT A TARGET ON YOUR BACK! Seriously, I can understand how people keep falling into this trap, but how they do so without seeing it coming a mile away, I will never figure out.
The immunity idol is my master… I will obey… Everything Jeff Probst does is gold… Ahem, sorry, got hypnotized by the new immunity idol there. Can’t really blame me, though, what with all the spirals. For all that I kid, I actually kind of like this new idol. It strikes a good balance, being distinctive without being garish. It goes well with the immunity challenge, which I also like, though slightly less. It’s an endurance challenge, but as it’s the first immunity challenge post-merge, that’s to be expected. Tribe members will swing a pendulum through a frame perpetually, trying to avoid knocking off a statue. Anyone whose statue falls or pendulum stops is out. First, the positive: I like how unpredictable this challenge is. Most endurance challenges favor one body type or another, but this one favors technique, which is harder to predict. Second, while it is in the vein of the endurance challenge, it’s a new type we haven’t seen before, which I like. All that said, this challenge may be a bit TOO unpredictable. It seemed to me that whether or not the statue got knocked off was due to random chance when the frame was hit, not so much with what technique it was hit. Creativity matters a lot, though, and this challenge has that.
After the expected winnowing of the players, we come down to our final three. Dan attempts to channel his spirit guide Emmet! Unfortunately, his affirmations about awesomeness are not enough, and Dan falls to our final two players. Not surprising, really, when your spirit guide’s powers are literally NOT HAVING ANY POWERS! Our true finalists are Alison and Elizabeth. One is a very serious potential target, whose winning of immunity would throw everything into glorious chaos, and the other is our winner. Yeah, you really thought things would work out that neatly? You must be new here.
And thus begins the conniving at camp. Elizabeth, of course, will be our main target for the evening, but who is to be our redirection? The answer, of course, comes from Angelina, who can’t resist flaunting her position of power. Rather than go with the obvious choice, she instead wants to make a big blindside of the person she considers the biggest threat from the Davids: Christian. Now, like Alec, I’m going to be hating on Angelina a LOT this episode, so let me give her credit where it’s due: She’s one of few people in 37 seasons to recognize that, at the merge, the biggest threat is the most popular guy, not the one who can win immunity. Dan is quite right when he says that Christian will likely not win immunity (barring a challenge of nothing but puzzles), but when it comes to the idea of “Goliath Strong”), he’s the best target. Everyone loves Christian. They made him a “Brochacho” for Christ’s sake! With him around, he can subtly spread discord amongst the majority, and brings sympathy to the minority. With him out of the way, the minor has fewer connections to the majority, and it’s easier to stonewall them. Actually a pretty good idea.
No, Angelina’s game flaw is not in her intellect, but her execution. Angelina does not suggest so much as demand, as we saw with the Jeremy vote previously. Not a way to endear oneself to one’s allies. On top of that, Angelina seems to feel she DESERVES the top spot, and can do no wrong. True, she was a major factor in the majority alliance coming together, but that doesn’t give her a right to lead. On “Survivor”, power can only be granted at the consent of the governed, and it seems as though Angelina has not been given that power. All that demanding (plus some pushing by Gabby, who’s concerned due to the former Goliaths walking a lot together, rather than her alliance) puts Angelina on the chopping block, and understandably so. This becomes especially true after Angelina finds out that the target was switched back to Elizabeth, and while she doesn’t throw a fit, she’s visibly frustrated. So much so that she informs Elizabeth, leading to Gabby’s intended insurrection. I could understand the move if Angelina wanted to propose an ALLIANCE with Elizabeth, but she seems to just hope for a Hail Mary pass, with some hope for a potential jury vote down the line. Oh well, guess it just makes her target more plausible. Now that we’ve narrowed our targets down to two, let me just say that I’m AMAZED Alec wasn’t one of them. With him having gone against Natalia earlier, and his unsubtle playing double agent earlier, I was SURE someone was going to throw his name out there just to calm things down.
Instead, we have the Angelina vs. Elizabeth debate, and where should our swing votes (the non-Angelina Goliaths) go? The answer, obviously, is Elizabeth. While Angelina is irritating to work with, it also gives you a rally point against someone other than yourself should the need arise, and helps keep the “double agent” thing going for those playing both sides. Sure, the former Davids might not be too happy, but with Lyrsa gone, no one was closely aligned with Elizabeth, and they don’t exactly have a lot of choice as to who to work with.
Going into this Tribal Council, there’s good mystery as to who will go. I especially have to give props to the editing team, having a dramatic cut to commercial with Angelina praying for her safety. Dramatic and awesome, much like the Tribal Council. Things devolve quickly when Elizabeth, to save herself, throws out her conversation with Angelina from earlier. Angelina derides this, but here I have to disagree with her. Angelina, you’re trying to vote out Elizabeth, or at least your alliance is. Throwing someone else under the bus is EXACTLY what one should do in this situation. Anything to save yourself. Angelina’s protests naturally make her seem more suspicious, and matters are further not helped by Gabby weaponizing how emotional she is. She beings to sound teary (though with no actual tears, you’ll notice) at Angelina’s “attack” on poor Elizabeth, and in doing so makes Angelina look like even more of a scumbag. A very dramatic, engaging Tribal Council, but it does have the drawback of removing the mystery out of all of it. There was good debate between Elizabeth and Angelina. Now it’s clear that Angelina will become the first member of the jury, after a poor performance like that. See, there’s Elizabeth now, getting her torch snuffed…
Is this just the way “Survivor” does things now? Hint so strongly that it’s going one way, then go the other way? Should I just accept it at this point?
Well, even if it is the way of the future, I’m not happy with Elizabeth’s exit. Both she and Angelina could be grating characters in their own way, but I feel like Elizabeth was more uniquely crazy, and had more room to grow, or at least do other strange things. Angelina just strikes me as a wannabee Parvati Shallow (“Survivor Micronesia”). That said, I can’t argue with the decision. Like I said, for the Goliaths, this keeps the Davids needy, and weakens their power. If you want to stay “Goliath Strong”, that’s great. If you want to work with the Davids, then this makes them need you all the more. A win no matter how you slice it.
For all my griping, this was a FANTASTIC episode, which is strange since it was a very by-the-numbers merge. As hinted at earlier, I think the editing is what really did it. Scenarios that in other hands could be boring became very exciting thanks to dynamic editing. Let’s hope the trend continues. Huzzah, editing team!
-Matt
Title Credit to Jean Storrs.
idolspeculation 
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