“Survivor” What-Ifs?: Island of the Idols

Ok, I know I usually start these “What If” blogs off fairly coy.  Talk a bit about how a given season was received, and whether we can make it better with one small change.  But there’s not beating around the bush here; it’s just not going to happen with this season.  In case you missed the title, we’re talking about “Island of the Idols”, arguably the most universally reviled season the show has ever produced.  And the causes of that revilement (the actions of Dan Spilo, and production’s responses to said actions) are not something that falls into the realm of my (admittedly self-imposed) restrictions on what changes I will examine.  All that said, there doesn’t mean there aren’t changes in the season worth talking about, and if you’ll permit me, we’ll take a stroll down this season to see what it is, and what it does.  

Also, consider this fair warning that there will be SPOILERS ahead.  It’s difficult to talk about changing how an event went down on a given season without talking about how it originally went down in our own timeline.  Moreover, I also talk about how such a change impacts seasons to come, so spoilers for the (admittedly few) seasons post-season-39, and potentially even a few from before that.  Now that you have been sufficiently warned, let us dig in.  

THE IMPACT

Our change comes to us fairly late in the season, and concerns everyone’s favorite advantage-finder, “Detective” Dean Kowalski.  In the penultimate episode of the season, Dean is sent to the titular “Island of the Idols”, where rather than an actual challenge or test in order to gain a powerful in-game item, Dean just has to get lucky in a coin-flip.  Whoop-De-Doo.  How could anyone possibly forget such an exciting contest, and random advantage in a season dedicated to giving out random advantages?  

Shade-throwing aside, Dean won a choice of three advantages in our timeline, going with an idol nullifier, probably the smartest of the three he could have picked, and as such, I don’t see him realistically choosing any advantage but that one.  Coin flips, however, fall perfectly under the purview of this blog, and so we can see how the outcome changes if Dean ISN’T so lucky in his coin flip.  

Yes, in this new timeline, Dean’s coin flip goes awry.  Instead of gaining an advantage, he loses his vote at the subsequent Tribal Council, the price for his gamble.  Now, fortunately for Dean, this is not an IMMEDIATE doom for his game.  In our timeline, Dean wins the subsequent immunity challenge, and as this coin flip and his performance in the challenge are unrelated, I don’t see any reason Dean doesn’t win said challenge in this new timeline.  His vote, while part of the majority, was also not needed for the ouster of Elaine this episode, so things so far seem ok for Dean.  Dan is still rightfully ejected at the end of the episode, and we move onto our finale, and the larger fallout from Dean’s failed gamble.  

THE FALLOUT

This is where the real meat of this change comes into play.  You see, Dean’s idol nullifier threw a wrench into the plan of Janet.  While she is still on the outs in this timeline, Janet had a hidden immunity idol to help make her way into the final four, where she would have had an edge due to her fire-making skills, demonstrated throughout the season.  She even played it correctly this episode!  The only thing stopping it from working was, you guessed it, Dean’s idol nullifier.  

Shock of all shocks, Janet is successful without an idol nullifier to block her path to the end.  She negates four votes against her, and her preferred target, Lauren, goes home.  At this point, all obstacles are out of Janet’s way.  Even if she didn’t manage to win immunity at the final four, that would merely mean that Noura, who won in our timeline, does so.  For Janet, it doesn’t even matter what happens now.  Whether she gets taken to the end by Noura, or she beats someone in fire-making, she’s all but guaranteed to face a jury that frankly is in love with her, and probably couldn’t wait to hand her the prize money.  If you were to ask me the most likely path here, I’d say Noura probably still takes Tommy to the end, and lets Dean and Janet battle it out for fire making.  Apart from matching up with what we know happened in our timeline, Noura would want Janet out (as would most everyone still in the game), and would thus be sure to put her into fire making.  She’d want the best chance of getting Janet out, and so, since Tommy did such a good job of selling himself as not good at fire, Dean goes in.  Janet, as mentioned before, beats him, and so our final three is now Janet, Noura, and Tommy.  

As mentioned before, Janet is pretty much guaranteed to win this jury.  I don’t want to say she’d have a unanimous victory (I could see people like Lauren and Missy giving Tommy a vote for example), but I don’t see any scenario where Janet doesn’t win.  She was perceived as a threat if she got to this point, was super-likable, and was about the only person who came out looking good from the Dan situation.  Yeah, no way Janet is not winning against this jury.  

THE LEGACY

For the first time in one of these blogs, there’s really not much of anything to talk about in terms of how this changes returnees and returnee seasons.  We’re so late in the “Survivor” overall timeline (at least at the time of this writing) that the only returnee season would be “Winners at War”, filming immediately after this season wrapped.  While Janet is a beloved winner in this timeline, and doubtless both the audience and the producers want her back (more so the former, since the latter probably want to forget this season exists overall), the timing just doesn’t work out.  There’s probably some grumbling from people who don’t understand the shooting schedule as to why Janet wasn’t invited back for that season, but it’s not a huge controversy.  If you wanted me to reach for some change that happens to a later season, I’d say MAYBE the show decides that, given how little impact/excitement came from Dean’s coin flip, they decide this is not a good method for advantages in future seasons.  If so, Michele, for example, might have gone out earlier in “Winners at War” without her coin flip, and things like that.  Really, though, given the show’s propensity to run a bad idea into the ground before admitting it was a bad idea and giving up on it, I’d be somewhat surprised if we even got this.  

No, the big changes down the line are in how various aspects of the season are perceived.  Obviously Janet is beloved in our timeline, and she’s even more beloved as a winner.  Her hype only increases, and I would expect her to be a lock for any future returnee seasons after “Winners at War”, assuming they allow pre-“Survivor 41” contestants back on those.  Conversely, without his glut of advantages to land him in the finals, I suspect Dean falls into obscurity, talked about only as a curiosity, and “What If” scenarios trying to come back to the timeline we know.  Lauren gets slightly more love that she does in our timeline, due to her exit being seen as more “cheap” than in ours, and gets a lot of love as a great strategist taken out by advantages rather than bad play on her part.  And, if we’re talking about perceptions around the show, I doubt the idol nullifier gets as much hate as it does for us now, since we’d only have Carl’s example on “Survivor David vs. Goliath”, aka an example people actually LIKE.  Thus, people start to wonder why it hasn’t really returned (unseen one Omar had on “Survivor 42” notwithstanding), not realizing the proverbial bullet they have dodged.  

The big change, though, is Tommy.  Of course he’s no longer the winner as he is in our timeline.  Yet, oddly, I feel like we would have seen more of him in the season than we did in our timeline.  This is, admittedly, speculation on my part, but I think a lot of the reason Tommy got such little content period was due the show oddly wanting to distance their winner from the season he won.  They could tell pretty much everyone (save Janet and Kellee) would come off looking some degree of “bad”, and so tried to minimize this for their winner.  The issue is that they did this by sucking everything entertaining away as well.  Without his win, there’s not need to make Tommy look like a perfect angel, and thus, they’re free to show more of him, the good and the bad.  “Teaching Time with Tommy” becomes a regular feature of the episodes, or at least as common as Rick Devans’ news updates on “Survivor Edge of Extinction”, and we probably get to hear more of his thoughts on the Dan situation, particularly more about how Dan factored into Tommy’s strategy.  Still, even now he’s not one of the bigger characters on the season, though he might still come back on “The Challenge”, since placement/character on “Survivor” seems to have little to do with who gets on that particular show.  

I said at the outset that we could not make this a good season with this change, and I stand by that.  By the time we’re able to make this particular timeline change, the damage is already done.  Janet’s win will not undo the ugliness of Dan’s actions, and how those actions were handled.  Still, I can see Janet’s win being the “One Redeeming Quality” this season has.  Much as strategy nerds like me love Tommy for winning without ever having individual immunity or an idol/advantage, the most exciting winner he was not.  Because he was so hidden, we didn’t get to know him very well, and thus the audience at large did not connect with him.  Janet, however, comes off well no matter what.  Since we still see so much of her in this timeline, her win is seen as the one good aspect of the season.  Think of it like Kim Spradlin’s victory on “Survivor One World”.  The season as a whole is still garbage, but at least the end result was satisfying.  The main difference, of course, is that “Survivor One World” is merely a poorly-produced season with a terrible overall cast, while “Survivor Island of the Idols” is actively painful and/or triggering for most of the audience, and thus the latter is much more reviled, and rightly so.  Even with that, however, Janet rises above all as something most of the fanbase loves.  

Well, perhaps a weird beginning, but it’s good to be back to these “What-If” blogs!  They’re honestly some of my favorites to write, and I’d like to do more of them moving forward.  That’s where your help comes in!  While I’ve always got a few scenarios running around in my head, there’s room for more.  As such, I want to hear from you what scenarios you’d like to see me cover on this blog!  Leave your submissions in the comments of this blog, or on whatever website linked you to this blog.  Credit will be given if your idea ends up being used.  That said, do be aware that there are some guidelines for getting your preferred scenario considered.  These are listed below:

1. One Change Only: This can’t be a whole bunch of things or multiple things going another way to alter the course of a season.  This must be one singular event that alters the season in some way.  Cascade effects, where one change naturally leads to another, are ok, but they have to be natural and logical.  As an example, Shii-Ann not flipping and Chuay Gahn losing the final 10 immunity challenge on “Survivor Thailand” would definitely change things, but those are two independent changes that need to happen, and therefore not appropriate for this blog.  I should also mention that the change has to be an EVENT, not a play style.  Yes, “Survivor Heroes vs. Villains” probably goes much differently if Russell Hantz (“Survivor Samoa”) isn’t an asshole to everyone, but apart from that never happening, it’s a change in overall play style, not a single moment.  It’s also, as I say, implausible, which leads to my next ground rule…

2. The Change Must Be Realistic: An unlikely change is ok, but it has to be something that COULD have happened, or it’s not worth writing about.  Yes, Fang winning the first immunity challenge on “Survivor Gabon” would drastically change the season.  Would it ever happen?  No.  So there’s no point in writing about it.  

3. The Change Must Have An Impact: By this, I mean the change has to actually alter the season in some significant way.  Simply changing up the boot order is not enough.  Someone new has to win, the perception of the season has to change, or both.  As an example, I originally planned to do a blog on “Survivor Heroes vs. Villains”, with a timeline where Candice didn’t flip at the final 9.  I thought this could lead to a Heroes victory.  Then I remembered that Russell Hantz plays his idol in that same episode, meaning the flip most likely doesn’t matter, and apart from a slight boot order change, the season as a whole remains untouched.  Uninteresting, and therefore not worth talking about.  

In addition to these hard-and-fast guidelines, there are also what I call “Flexible Guidelines”.  As the name would imply, these can be bent with a compelling arguments, but they are things that should be borne in mind when suggesting new situations to examine:

4. US Seasons Only: This is nothing against international seasons of “Survivor”.  From what I’ve heard through the grapevine, they can be quite good.  The trouble is, as a citizen on the US, the US version of “Survivor” is the one I’m most familiar with, know the most about, and have seen the most of.  I haven’t even seen a full international season of “Survivor”, just the occasional clip.  Nothing knocking them, of course.  I just haven’t gotten around to viewing them.  So, while I won’t outright ban the suggesting of changes from non-US seasons of “Survivor”, bear in mind that I’m unlikely to pick them due to a lack of knowledge and lack of time to catch up on the seasons.  

5. I Will Not Do Brandon Flipping At The Africa Final 9: A flip by Brandon Quinton at the Final 9 of “Survivor Africa”, voting out Lex instead of Kelly, would indeed fit all the criteria mentioned above.  I’m refusing this particular scenario, not because it isn’t interesting or worth talking about, but because it was already covered by Mario Lanza in his book “When it Was Worth Playing For”.  He covered it so well and so thoroughly that I don’t think I would have anything to add.  I’m willing to consider this scenario if someone can give me a compelling reason that Mario is wrong, or there’s some aspect he didn’t consider, but until that time, this scenario is out.  Other “Survivor Africa” scenarios are ok, though.

6. Try Not To Repeat Seasons: This is by far the most flexible of the flexible guidelines, particularly as many seasons have multiple inflection points with a fascinating change to dissect.  However, to prevent a lot of repetition, I try and prioritize scenarios from a season I haven’t done a “What-If?” on yet, over ones that I’ve already covered one scenario on.  You can feel free to submit scenarios for seasons I’ve already looked at, but bear in mind that I’m unlikely to cover them until I’m out of ideas for “What-Ifs?” on seasons I haven’t done yet.  For reference, at the time of this writing, I have done scenarios from the following seasons: Marquesas, Pearl Islands, All-Stars, Palau, Guatemala, Exile Island, Micronesia, Gabon, Samoa, Heroes vs. Villains, Redemption Island, Philippines, Blood vs. Water, Game Changers, Island of the Idols.  

I look forward to seeing your submissions, and giving you more blogs during the off-season.  Take care out there!

-Matt

“Survivor” Top 5 and Bottom 5: Season Previews

What, you thought that “Short History” blog was going to get it all out of my system?  No, no, no, no, NO dear reader.  I am going to milk that hour plus of my life spent watching nothing but “Survivor” season previews for all they’re worth!  Not only am I going to have gone over how they changed over the years, but I’m going to RANK my favorites and least-favorites for you!

Yes, it is time once again for the return of “Top 5 and Bottom 5”, the segment where I rank various aspects of “Survivor”.   The best of the best, and the worst of the worst.  You’ll hear what I think they are, and why.  In this case, as you might expect, we’re talking about the season previews.  That segment at or near the end of the reunion show where we get a look at what’s coming up on the following season.  This, of course, begs the question of what makes a good season preview.  One word: Hype.  How much does this preview get me pumped for what’s coming up next.  Whatever it’s going for, be it intrigue about the location, or mystery about the cast or twist, does not matter.  If I’m excited for this season based solely on the preview, it’s good.  If it leaves me cold, it’s bad.  The one other bit of business is that season name I give is the SUBJECT of the preview, not the season whose reunion at which the preview occurred.  With that out of the way, let’s gets started, shall we?

TOP 5

5. “Survivor Vanuatu”: Starting off with kind of an odd duck here.  Credit where it’s due, “Survivor Vanuatu” does its level best to make the location seem exotic and dangerous.  Sadly, this is kind of done via playing up to a lot of stereotypes people have about Pacific Islanders.  Notably the cannibalism aspect is played up, over a lot of (fairly unflattering) stock footage of the native peoples.  That said, this is not the only trick in this preview’s book.  They mention Vanuatu inventing land-diving, the precursor to modern-day bungee jumping (though with a more religious aspect than bungee jumping), and the subtitle “Islands of Fire”, perfectly placed over footage of erupting volcanoes, is certainly evocative.  Still, between leaning on stock footage and playing to some uncomfortable stereotypes put this one on the fence for me.  Some good aspects that hit you right in the feels, some aspects that turn those feels uncomfortable.  What pushed it over the edge into good?  Well, that’s the odd duck.  For the most part, these previews are a good whole, but this one has one particular shot that stands out above the rest.  Not the volcanoes.  Not the native peoples.  No, this lands on the list purely for a gorgeous head-on shot of a fish eating a smaller fish.  You can argue it’s an apt metaphor for the game of “Survivor”, but frankly, it’s here because it just looks damn cool.  As such, this is one of the previews I can recall more easily than others, and as such, lands a spot on this list.  

4. “Survivor Micronesia”: The first season to have players in the game speak in the preview, and I would argue one of the most effective.  The beauty of it is how it plays with our expectations.  Naturally, with a season at least half-returnees, you’d expect the returnees to be the thing hyped.  Indeed, the thought in the fanbase at the time is that this would be another “All-Stars” season.  Thus, seeing these new, random players, all talking about their love for “Survivor”, threw us for a loop, but kept us interesting.  Now, the premise was not kept secret in this preview.  It was clear that they would be going up against returnees; Probst said so.  But the returnees themselves?  Not shown.  Not hinted at.  And pretty much every mainstream cast speculation was assuming a season of nothing but returnees.  20 names, usually from Vanuatu on.  That number gets halved?  Let the intrigue begin.  Months of speculation about who was coming back, and whether the fans could actually hack it against them.  That’s the sort of hype the show can only dream of.  So, with all this hype, why only #4?  Well, while the preview is solidly constructed in and of itself, as I said part of the greatness was how it played with expectations of the fan community at the time.  But time inexorably moves forward (unless you’re the Doctor from “Dr. Who”), and that fan reaction and speculation just can’t be recreated from preview alone.  As such, this preview suffers a bit on rewatch.  Still solid, though.  

3. “Survivor 43”: As I’ve hinted at in a couple of past blogs at this point, the preview for the season that is upcoming at the time of this writing is very much a “love it or hate it” one, for just how different it is from everything that came before it.  I can see arguments for both sides, but put me in the “love it” category for sure.  The cast is (almost) always the thing that makes or breaks a season of “Survivor”, and the thing that keeps the show fresh season after season.  As such, if it’s the main draw, why not give us little snippets of what’s to come, and hype us up?  The fans of “Survivor” are, in my experience, the type of fans who will pick apart every little detail, and so this preview, while giving us a broad swath of the new cast, is not giving us much depth, but a lot of little things to speculate again.  This, again, builds hype, which is always the goal.  Now, there is the fear of giving too much away, and if the nine people we saw in the preview make the top nine?  Well, I’ll be happy, since they seem like a good group, but I’ll also be disappointed that this was telegraphed so blatantly.  That is the danger that keeps it off the top of the list.  That, and I do think a BIT of hokey Probst narration would help.  Not as much as previous seasons, but a little bit would spice things up.  All that said, focussing the preview on the cast?  There’s some pitfalls, but overall I’m for it!

2. “Survivor Africa”: This one feels a bit like cheating.  After all, Probst is just taking boilerplate statements and footage of Kenya and the native wildlife to hype up the season.   You can imagine the animals and the statements.  “Cradle of civilization”.  “Harsh landscape”.  “Beautiful but deadly”.  Pretty much how most Western media has characterized the entire continent since the advent of modern movies.  But Probst is nothing if not a good salesman, and he pulls it off well.  The danger is invoked, and the hype and mystery around how the season will play out is real.  If you want to hype up a season purely based on location, this is the way to do it.  Watching this when I was going back to catch up on my “Survivor” history, this was the season I was most excited to get to based on preview alone, and for this reason and this reason alone, it lands high.  Only thing keeping it from the top spot is that I’m not as big on location-based previews in my old age as when I first started watching.  

1. “Survivor Exile Island”: The first full preview that focussed primarily on the twist of the season, rather than the location, and I would argue set a bar subsequent seasons have yet to meet.  For some reason, they just struck the right balance that no other season has been able to replicate.  The general gist of the season-defining twist is explained, but leaving enough room for specific variations to keep the fanbase guessing and, more importantly, talking.  Plus, the general mystery.  Probst made sure to let us know there would be something game-changing on Exile Island, without saying what.  We the audience could tell this would be something big.  Something different.  And even if we didn’t know it at the time, it would change the course of the show completely moving forward.  Enough information to satiate us and get us excited, but not so much that it gives the game away.  How future seasons lost this balance, I don’t know, but this preview remains the king at the time of this writing.  

Honorable Mention: “Survivor Cambodia”: Given my druthers, this would be the season preview that would be number one.  I may call “Survivor Exile Island” the king, and by the strict definition of preview it remains so, but this is the only preview I seek out to rewatch.  Frankly, the live vote reveal for the “Second Chance” contestants was a stroke of genius.  We’ve been on tenterhooks for weeks about who would get on, and the tension is kept all the way to the end.  When people do get on, we experience the joy of them getting on.  True, some might say that this then leads to the downside of experiencing the despair of those who did not make it, but most take it with dignity, and the show acknowledges their contribution long enough to show respect, but briefly enough to let them mourn in peace, at least in my opinion.  Frankly, all this is buildup and spectacle you just can’t get in a pre-recorded preview.  What keeps it off the list proper is not lack of quality, but a technicality.  When you look up a montage of season previews, this one is nowhere to be found.  By the strict definition that is given for “season preview”, this one does not count, due to not being pre-recorded.  Thus, I cannot put it on the top spot it deserves, but I can at least give it credit here.  

BOTTOM 5

5. “Survivor Fiji”: Longtime readers of mind will know that, at least prior to “Survivor Edge of Extinction”, this season was a favorite punching bag of mine.  Least favorite season personally for a long time (not so now), and I was fond of dissecting every little thing it does wrong.  Its preview does have flaws as well, but to its credit, I will say it’s actually not that bad.  This is the first time we saw players of the game in the preview, with Probst using shots of Alex and Dreamz to highlight the contrast in backgrounds of the cast.  Like I said in regards to the “Season 43” preview, the cast is the selling point.  While hearing from them is going to build more hype, the shots we get, and the promise of contrasting backgrounds, is good for building it up as well.  Most of the rest of the preview is just standard “Look how exotic and dangerous this location is” stuff.  Kind of dull, but not enough to land on the bottom list alone.  Sadly Probst, in his narration, flies too close to the proverbial sun here.  The sin of this preview, and the thing landing it on this particular list, is when the show tries to predict what the audience will latch onto.  The preview references “A controversial decision that will have America talking.”, referring to Dreamz and Yau-Man’s car deal.  I can understand why the show thought this would be controversial, but trying to predict what the fandom will latch onto in terms of season-defining moments is a gamble at best, and one that did not pay off in this case.  The only real “controversy” this generated was butt-hurt Yau-Man fans who wanted Dreamz to throw himself on his sword for their favorite player.  On top of that, the promise of something exciting coming, only then to not show up until the penultimate episode of the season, left the rest feeling lacking.  Watching, I kept waiting for this thing to show up.  Surely the show would not promise what they were not planning to deliver until the end.  But now, we slogged through disappointing week after disappointing week, only to get a failure of a delivery on the promised controversy.  Not quite a bait-and-switch, but it feels like one.  Parts of the preview are good, but when Probst goes Nostradamus, it really drags the whole thing down.  

4. “Survivor Thailand”: Much as I may have some of the decisions on the “Survivor Fiji” preview, though, at least it had effort.  Thailand’s preview just felt LAZY.  Really cheap CGI effects, very boilerplate building up of the location, and only a lackluster attempt at describing the excitement of the strategic game.  I don’t know if the show was losing energy, or just knew they had a dud of a season on their hands, but this felt like they were phoning it in.  Australia and Africa were built up as epic and dangerous locations, and even Marquesas emphasized the lack of resources for the players.  Thailand just felt like “This is the new location, but it’s nothing special”.  And if production doesn’t care, why should we?  

3. “Survivor Island of the Idols”: So by the time we get to this season preview, we’re well into the “Let the cast be the main draw of the season” era of previews.  We’ve heard from at least a few members of every cast since “Survivor Kaoh Rong”’s preview.  This is the exception, and unfortunately not in a good way.  Two names, people: Boston Rob and Sandra.  That’s it.  That’s all you get.  Look, I may have criticized some previews for not showing enough of the returnees, but that was because they were PLAYERS.  People we could get invested in in terms of the game.  Boston Rob and Sandra, while overall popular, are glorified on-camera producers this season.  This would be like Probst standing there talking about the season… AND THAT’S IT!  Who cares about what happens on the season, or who’s playing in it?  We’ve got a PRODUCER on the scene!  I’ll credit it that it at least gives an accurate IDEA of what’s to come on the season, emphasizing the old players more than the new cast, but that’s because this is not a good season, and we need to take our good points where we can get them.  On top of that, there’s a major missed opportunity here.  You can build up the twist, fine.  Have Probst narration say that our new players will be getting “The ultimate reward: The opportunity to learn from the best.” or something like that.  We hear from the players a bit.  But DON’T SHOW US WHO’S COMING!  Let us speculate about who the idols were!  That would be a great way to build hype!  Bury your lead a little bit, don’t give away the game in the first five seconds.  Structurally I suppose there’s nothing wrong with this preview, but the sidelining of the cast, coupled with the missed opportunity, make this a preview that will live in infamy.  

2. “Survivor Gabon”: No beating around the bush, this one is just hokey.  Other previews had tried to contrast modern, everyday life to what the new contestants would be going through on the show, but resorting to very obvious stock footage just looked… wrong somehow.  The talk about how exotic and dangerous the new location is is THERE, but often seems sideline to build up that the show is now in HD!  Because, you know, the people who are dedicated, loyal fans of “Survivor” are clearly there for the visuals.  Not that this shouldn’t be mentioned, but it’s the thing that stands out from the preview, and if THAT’S the strong point of your season, you need some help.  “Survivor Gabon” is a good season, but you wouldn’t know it from how the show built it up.  

1. “Survivor Blood vs. Water”: Look, I get what the show was going for here.  They wanted to innovate, try something different.  Social media was now commonplace enough that they figured “Hey, why don’t we keep things a little mysterious, you know, play it coy, and let the fans build the hype for us?”  And, in principle, I can agree.  As I said, the speculation around the specifics of “Survivor Exile Island” from the preview is a lot of what makes that particular preview so great.  But you need to give us SOMETHING!  This preview lands on the top spot of infamy for sheer brevity.  These are not novel-length previews, but most at least give us a MINUTE of good content to work with.  This?  This is just a giant ball of NOTHING!  Even the other previews in a similar vein, those being “Survivor Cagayan” and “Survivor San Juan del Sur” gave us a bit.  Cagayan had the “Brains, Brawn, Beauty” in the logo to speculate about, and San Juan del Sur pointed out how successful Blood vs. Water was as a format.  But this?  A droplet of blood falling into water.  Whoop de doo.  To speculate, you need something to speculate about.  This preview gives us nothing, and thus we leave with nothing.  It came, it went, no one cared, and thus, it is the worst “official” preview the show has ever had.  

Honorable Mention: “Survivor All-Stars”: Once again, we have a season that by rights SHOULD have the top spot, but stays off by technically not being a “preview”.  And that still baffles me to this day.  This is a season the fans have been wanting for a while.  This should be the EASIEST season to hype up.  But instead, you just have Probst casually mention it at the end of the reunion?  No video footage?  I’ve speculated at length as to why, yet the reasoning behind such a decision remains beyond my comprehension.  For all that I just gave Blood vs. Water flak for the lack of effort, at least they turned in the assignment!  Can’t lose if you don’t try, I suppose, but given the gravitas a season called “All-Stars” commands, you could at least have given us SOMETHING.  

Ok, think it’s all out of my system now.  Thank you all for listening to me rant, and I look forward to hearing your thoughts.  What previews are your favorite/least favorite, and why?  Do you prefer location-based previews, twist-based ones, or cast-based ones?  Whatever your preference, keep enjoying your off-season!

Oh, and for those of you who are sick of hearing me talk about season previews, the next blog will be a return to “Survivor” What-Ifs, I promise.  

-Matt