Idol Speculation: “Survivor Edge of Extinction” “Finale”: Rise of the Quotation Marks

Well, “Survivor”, credit where credit is due: You did it. You managed to give us another first. Many would have thought it impossible after 38 seasons of the show, but they managed it. Yes, I can definitely say without a doubt, this season…

IS THE WORST THING THIS SHOW HAS EVER DONE IN THE ENTIRETY OF ITS EXISTENCE! Look, I’ve tried to be as fair as possible to this season. I tried not to go in hating it on the twist alone. I gave it credit where it earned it. Hell, I would even say some of the merge episodes were pretty good. Not legendary, mind you, but entertaining and worthy of the “Survivor” brand. But that ending. Good Lord, that ending! I had prepared myself for this possibility. I thought I was ok with it, but the more and more I think about it, the more and more it just pisses me off. Yes, “Survivor Fiji” can now rest easy. It has stopped being the general punching bag of bad “Survivor” seasons for me. Be prepared for a number of “Survivor Edge of Extinction” jokes in the future. What could make a season so bad that even the presence of my beloved Aubry cannot earn it any credit?

Well, before we find out, we have to delay talking about this awful “finale” with another round of…

MATT’S MESS-UP!

I’ll keep this one brief, but I feel it’s important to touch on. For all that I give Rick credit for what he was able to do, and how he’s able to win over the jury, I wasn’t impressed with his performance at the previous Tribal Council. The whole “righteous indignation” thing worked at the Ron boot, because Rick had actually been tricked in what could be interpreted as a mean-spirited way. This time, however? He’s just mocking their inability to vote him out. Kind of giving back the whole “mean-spirited” thing, and losing the high ground, Rick.

Moving on to our episode proper, you’d think we’d start out at the fallout of the previous Tribal Council. HA HA! You fool! That’s for seasons that DON’T have 8/9ths of the contestants left in the final episode! Because heaven forbid a great character become an early martyr! Yes, we’re going straight to our “Edge of Extinction” challenge, which is your standard ropes course with a table maze at the end, though with a few cool elements. One is the maze itself, which is distinguishable by having the holes for the balls in separate spots, at the midpoint and the end, rather than side-by-side. The big draw, here, is the bridge to the table maze. Rather than your standard plank puzzle bridge, players use the ropes they’ve been navigating through to build the bridge, which is a new idea that works on “Survivor”, and is pretty challenging. Shame it has to be wasted on as overall lackluster a challenge as this.

Now, with 16 people competing in arguably their most important challenge of their game, we of course need some idea of who’s in it to win it. The smart thing to do would have been to build story arcs for those on the Edge of Extinction, like you would do in a NORMAL season, and then let this challenge be the culmination of said story arcs. This being “Survivor Edge of Extinction” they instead do the dumb thing of giving us little to nothing of most of our players, and instead just have the frontrunners get out early in the challenge. Thus, we quickly learn that only Aurora, Eric, Joey Amazing, and Chris are really in contention. Aubry, despite my hopes and predictions, chokes. Even worse, she chokes on the part of the challenge SHE HAD PRACTICED! No, it does not diminish my love for her, and no, it does not contribute to my newfound hatred for this season. Even if Aubry’s loss could be counted as a “sin”, believe me, it would be the LEAST of the sins here.

Out of these four, Chris is our winner. I suppose of those four, he had the closest thing to a story arc, though I lump his “I didn’t get my perfect game.” storyline with Andrew Savage’s “I’m missing my perfect supermodel wife from my life where everything except ‘Survivor’ is perfect!” storyline: It exists, but is pointless and whiny, serving only to turn me against the character. We get our teary farewell confessionals from our remaining contestants who are now, mercifully out of the game. I suppose it’s decently emotional, but more due to the mirror neurons firing than due to the confessionals themselves actually being emotional.

This leads to our first forced Probst segment, where he talks to Joe about losing the game again. After getting an assurance from Joe that Joe thinks he himself can win, Probst nearly has a heart attack when Joe is noncommittal about returning. Trying to salvage the situation, Probst goes for what I describe as “comedy” only in the loosest sense of the term, going on about Joe’s hair being his weakness. Probst, might I suggest you look up the story of “Samson and Delilah”? You might learn a few things about suggest haircuts.

Getting back to camp, Chris now has the daunting task of integrating himself into a group that has every reason to want him gone, and half of whom he hasn’t even played with prior to this day. To his credit, I think he plays it off as best he can here. He talks about the harshness of Edge of Extinction, and how exhausted he is from playing on it. However, he also highlights the insights he has to the jury, and how he’s willing to talk about them with anyone. This simultaneously diminishes Chris’ threat level, while also giving him a bargaining chip in any conversation. His salesman’s skills mean that to the untrained eye, this comes off as genuine. Fortunately for us, Victoria is highly intelligent, as well as having a good bullshit detector. She notes that OF COURSE this is what Chris is going to say, and affirms that he and Rick are targets A and B.

Chris, of course, still needs allies, and so speaks with Rick, the one person who might have his back. Indeed, Rick notes the irony of the situation: How he had helped vote Chris out, only to be voted out himself, and now the two need to work together if they hope to survive. Rick admits to some mistrust, but the guy with no allies to speak of takes what he can get.

Obstacle course number one is nothing to speak of, though I’ll give credit that the circular puzzle is better this time, in and of that you can’t simply look at the logo to get the design. You’d have to examine the immunity idol, which is harder to see at a distance and less frequently examined closely. Julie ends up the victor, which would be uneventful were it not for the way she wins. Oh, I’m not talking about her mistake in building the border first rather than building vertically to help prevent puzzle collapse. No, Chris, recognizing his own inevitable loss of the challenge, stops what he’s doing to help Julie. This, understandably, gets the attention of Rick, who was decently close in the challenge, and is naturally unhappy about a supposed ally helping to ensure his defeat. This is played up as a big deal, and I think it SHOULD have been a big deal, but for two guys with few alliance prospects, I doubt they can let this come between them.

Julie also wins steak dinner, with the choice to bring two people along with her. Hoo boy, does Julie drop the ball here. Chris is her first choice, and I get where she’s coming from in the “he hasn’t had anything to eat since he got voted out” thing, plus the whole “helped her win the challenge” thing, but Julie, it’s the end of the game. Time to be cutthroat. Need I remind you that you are STRENGTHENING ARGUABLY THE BIGGEST CHALLENGE THREAT LEFT IN THE GAME WHO YOU AREN’T EVEN ALLIED WITH? Sigh. At least her second pick, Lauren, makes a little more sense, since they did work together and all before, but despite this, it still alienates her allies. Specifically Victoria, which even RICK calls out as a dumb move on her part. Need I remind you that the only times Victoria HASN’T voted correctly has been when she’s helping out with a split vote? She seems like a person you don’t want to piss off.

Over dinner, our castaways discuss their vote-out options. Rick is of course the primary target, and Chris proves his loyalty by covering for Rick’s idol, which Rick had revealed to him in their previous talk. This then leads to who the backup should be, with the idea floated out that Victoria be the next one to go. Makes sense. She seems popular, and I think has been a low-key major decision maker this entire time. Rick is, of course, planning to use his idol tonight, though whether he’ll go against Chris or not is up in the air. After all, if he were to sway Gavin and Victoria to his side, he’d be able to at least tie, and then rely on everyone else’s self-preservation instinct to break that tie. Despite saving Chris being the clear obvious choice, this is actually some interesting misdirection.

Too bad it goes nowhere! We find out that, like Rick, Chris was given an idol good for the next Tribal Council, but only if half is temporarily given to another player. Chris, recognizing the need to build trust, gives it to Rick, who now trusts Chris 100%, and cements the loss of Victoria. I’ll explain why that’s a shame in a bit, but first, let’s talk about the substitute intrigue for a bit. Rick is hardly the only person Chris has been talking to, and Lauren, at least, is willing to give him the time of day. Chris knows from Kelley that she has an idol, but has been keeping it under wraps for her. Chris tells her that what the jury is looking for is for idols to be played, and played correctly. A plausible lie told in a convincing way. So, now the question is: Will Lauren play her idol for Chris?

Yes. The answer is yes. After a throughly “nothing” Tribal Council, we find that both Lauren and Rick blow their idols. Rick needed to, but as Lauren laments, she wasted hers, with Victoria going out 2 to nothing, against the one vote Chris would have had. Victoria is a major loss for the season, in more ways than one. This gets into the first two problems this season has: who gets booted, and how they’re presented. There were some great new characters and strategists this season, and Victoria, for me, was definitely one of them. More so the latter than the former, but still intriguing, particularly given her young age. Thus, losing her loses the person I was most rooting for at this point, and while it’s a smart move to take out the smart people at this point in the game, it’s not as fun from an audience perspective. More to the point, however, is that while all these things about Victoria are true, you need to look REALLY deep to find them. For all that Victoria was a major force this season, post Aubry-boot she was pretty much nonexistent. Probst even commented at the Reunion show (which is spared quotation marks due to actually being decent this season) that Victoria played a good under-the-radar game that doesn’t get the credit it deserves. Nice sentiment, Probst, but here’s an idea: If you want people to get credit for their work, THEN ACTUALLY SHOW THEIR WORK! My God, the wasted potential here is staggering. Victoria, you deserved a much better season than the one we got.

On a positive note, I will say I admire Eric’s decision to NOT clean himself up at Ponderosa. Helps him stand out, and is a nice, respectful touch.

So, this means we get a segment with Probst detailing Victoria’s game, and hopes for the future, right? Silly viewer! Those are for who PRODUCTION cares about, not who you care about!

Getting back to camp, Rick of course foolishly sets out to look for an idol. I say “foolishly” because of course, after the backlash that the fire-making final four twist from “Survivor Heroes vs. Healers vs. Hustlers” received, they have moved back when regular idols work to the final six, leaving only Chris’ as a legitimate idol left. Then you remember that this is “Survivor Edge of Extinction” where everything you love goes to die! Instead, Rick finds yet ANOTHER idol, thus guaranteeing himself the final four. If, at this point, you think there’s an overabundance of idols for so late in the game, you’re right! Look, I give the producers more slack on the “Advantagegeddon” even on “Survivor Game Changers” than most. While I agree that season overall was too twist-heavy, that particular event I say was more due to the contestants then having balls of steel to hold their idols and advantages so long. But putting in new idols when there’s only one legitimate vote left in the game? That’s just too much. I will never be a fan of the fire-making final four happening automatically, but if you give us one vote with no possible idols, it becomes much more tolerable.

Not content with having TWO hidden immunity idols in the game, Rick now decides he needs FAKE idols in the game as well. He hides a pair of them (with notes from his previous idols for legitimacy), which Lauren and Julie, having learned from their previous efforts of NOT following Rick, find. Rick proves just how much of the high ground he’s taking by laughing obnoxiously behind their backs as they make these efforts. Our hero, everybody.

Our second immunity challenge is your standard ropes obstacle course with little fanfare, though putting it over water was a nice touch. Rick wins, rendering his idol DOUBLY pointless, but making for an interesting situation back at camp. You see, everyone BUT Gavin thinks they’re safe. Preying on this, Rick suggest that he’ll play his idol on Gavin if Gavin votes with them. Gavin, not being a moron, jumps at the chance. But who should they target. The debate, by default, is between Julie and Lauren. Lauren’s played a more dominant game in their eyes, while Julie might have more friends on the jury. The answer, however, is quite obvious to me. Julie must go. Yes, Lauren has a stronger game overall, but it’s not one necessarily respected by the jury. Who the jury wants to win is the biggest factor at this point, making Julie a threat. Moreover, Lauren, being original Manu, is more likely to help one or both of you out at the final four, whereas Julie is not likely to at all. Better to get rid of her.

Our second Tribal Council is just as “nothing” as the first, save for that for once people make the stupid decision. After Lauren and Julie get needlessly humiliated with the fake idols (not that I don’t think Rick shouldn’t have made them, as they did help throw the scent off of him, but the laughter was needless), Lauren gets sent home. Again, I’m sorry to see her go. While not the same level as Victoria, she had a determination I liked, and again, was probably the best non-Rick strategist left in the game. Losing her loses a lot of investment in the season, and another good player to boot.

Our final immunity challenge is the now standard “Stack blocks to make a phrase” challenge, though this one does up the game a bit by having contestants walk along an arced board while still holding the platform steady. Much as I despise this challenge for being repetitive at this point, that is a pretty clever way to shake things up. Gavin and Rick make basically no headway, so our battle comes down to Julie and Chris. Julie is overall faster, but also messes up, handing Chris an easy victory. Meaning yes, someone who was voted out of the game just over a week in, and who will have played less than two weeks total, just made the finals. I’m sure this will in no way backfire on the show whatsoever!

Chris, of course, now has to choose who will be going to fire making. He tries to play things cool with Rick, but Rick pretty quickly picks up on the fact that Chris doesn’t want him in the finals, and so goes to make fire. The debate for Chris really comes down to who he thinks can beat Rick in fire making, and he tells as much to Julie and Gavin. He coaches each of them on fire making, but no real conclusion is reached as we head off to Tribal Council.

Soon enough, we see exactly WHY no conclusion was reached: because Chris chose to take a third option. A stupid option, to be sure, but an option nonetheless. You see, Chris has decided to go full Domenick Abbate (“Survivor Ghost Island”), and give up immunity to Julie, allowing him to battle Rick for the right to remain in the game. For some reason, despite giving up immunity, Chris is allowed to choose who goes to fire making. Granted, I don’t think Julie would have chosen differently, but still, you’d think it’d be her choice, given that she now has immunity. Look, I can see the logic here. Like Domenick, Chris doesn’t want to lose votes to another worthy competitor, and so moves to eliminate that chance, at great risk to himself. It is this last part that I take issue with. No matter how much of a jury threat someone is, IT IS NEVER WORTH RISKING YOUR OWN SPOT IN THE GAME FOR THEM! This was Chris’ worst move of the night, and he’s lucky it didn’t backfire on him. Rick goes home, and again, I’m disappointed. A Rick win would have been predictable from the edit, and certainly would have had an asterisk next to it for the whole “Edge of Extinction” twist, but we at least got to see his gameplay, and he would have been an entertaining winner, if nothing else. Instead, we’re left with decent enough players and nice people, but whose stories were weak (Julie, Chris) or nonexistent (Gavin). Joy.

Between segments, we get another Probst interlude, as Rick is popular enough to warrant an interview. It’s less cringe-worthy than Joe’s segment, as really all Probst tries to do is to get Rick to follow in the footsteps of John Cochran (“Survivor South Pacific”), and come work for CBS. Pointless, but nothing annoying about it.

To their credit, all our contestants actually give themselves pretty good arguments about why they should win on this particular day 39. Julie cites her willingness to change up the game, Gavin leans on his social bonds, and Chris notes the effort it took to return from Edge of Extinction. For all my complaints, this is one part the episode actually does well. For a moment, it seems like everyone has a shot.

That is, until we get to Final Tribal Council. Then, Julie at least is shut out. Frankly, of the finalists, she’s probably the one I most wanted to win, due to her arguably actually having an arc. The trouble is, said arc involves Julie acting on her emotions, and while an emotional argument can be powerful, Julie doesn’t demonstrate good control over them, thus making her gameplay come off as erratic and reactionary, rather than controlled and calculated. She’s out, but Chris does himself few favors as well. When Gavin makes a point about his own game at the expense of Chris’, Chris interrupts him to rebut the argument. The jury gets on his case for this, though, citing it as disrespectful. And yet, Chris keeps doing it. True, he does get in good arguments about his social manipulation in the time he had, using Lauren playing her idol as an example of this. Still, that doesn’t mean his interactions with the other finalists come off well. The only person who comes off decently here is Gavin, who manages to articulate his social game nicely, and provide some good, concrete examples. Like with previous uses of this jury format, we do lose those great, defining moments a jury question can provide. The overall Final Tribal Council is sound.

The conclusion, however, is not, and now it is time. We must discuss the sin that ruins the season retroactively. The sin that makes this the worst season of “Survivor” there ever was, purely by default. Our winner, as one might expect, is Chris Underwood.

Where to start with the problems this causes? Well, for one thing, CHRIS WAS VOTED OUT OF THE GAME ON DAY 8! Yes, our winner is a man who so badly bungled a situation, that he was voted out pre-merge. Also bear in mind that he was a physical challenge beast on a tribe that desperately needed challenge strength. For him to be voted out in spite of this speaks volumes about just how badly he bungled his situation. Not only did he bungle his situation, but this also means Chris didn’t need to work nearly as hard as everyone else. While Gavin, Julie, and the other finalists (yes, even Rick to some degree), all had to put themselves at risk, and navigating the social quagmire that is betraying people but still having them like you, all Chris had to do was sit, wait, win one crucial challenge, and not be an asshole. It’s not NOTHING, but compared to what everyone else had to go through, it seems like a lot less, and ought to have disqualified him outright from his victory. This, of course, begs the question of how I would have felt about a Rick victory. I can’t say I would have been fully on board with it, but I wouldn’t have felt like disqualifying Rick quite as much as I do Chris. Rick did get voted out of the game, but unlike Chris, it was less due to his game play, and more due to having the bad luck to end up on a tribe with few options. Rick’s loss was largely due to luck, Chris’ to skill. See the difference? Plus, Rick was in the game the majority of the time, and had to navigate difficult situations, while Chris faced few, if any. Did Chris do nothing? Of course not! His gameplay this episode was masterful, and he’s definitely charming enough to earn a few votes. But think about how this would have looked in previous seasons. Let’s take the case of Hunter Ellis from “Survivor Marquesas”, and man who fills the same roll as Chris, and was voted out at the same point in the game. People loved Hunter at the time, and were shocked at his vote out. Many even advocate for his return. But would you really still love him if, having made no enemies, he was just randomly put back in the game at the end? No. No you wouldn’t. You’d feel production was giving him a leg up because heaven forbid we produce an unsatisfying winner! Ironically, by doing all this, I say production made what could have been a future satisfying winner unsatisfying. I’m glad Chris got the chance to show what he could do, and as I say, he did it well, and there’s nothing offensive about him as a person. But we should have gotten to see these things on a “Second Chances” type season, rather than shoehorning Chris in in the last episode.

But, to be fair, pretty much all of what I’ve vilified is stuff that’s out of Chris’ control. He didn’t ask to be put on an Edge of Extinction season, and made the best of what he had. Besides, however unfair it might be, any twist in the game is legitimate, and you can only play the hand you’re dealt, right? That is correct, and so all of the above, I’m willing to at least consider a counter-argument to. However, even if you were to take away all these problems, one major one still reigns. One question that has no satisfying answer, and is what, by default, makes this the worst season the show has ever put out:

What was the point of having all the episodes this season?

Here’s what I mean: “Survivor”, at its core, is about the journey to the finals. How do our finalists get there, and how do they beat out the other finalists? Some seasons do this better than others. Some seasons make the outcome super obvious. Some seasons subtly manipulate the audience, leading us on a good mystery hunt. Regardless, though, however dominant or just pain good at the game a player is, they still have to go through it. They still have to jump through to hoops so that we can see the progress of their journey. But Chris’ journey largely played out of Edge of Extinction, where even if we DID get footage of it, screen time needed to be divided between everyone else there. Thus, Chris got lost in the shuffle, and we the audience feel like we only really got to know him in this last episode. Again, he played well in that episode, but it still begs the question: If all we needed was this episode, why did we watch all the others?

There was really no season recap this time, nor was there Probst talking about why each remaining player could win. Frankly, I’m happy the latter is gone, since it was kind of forced anyway, but the former can be necessary. After all, more people tend to tune in to the finale of a show, rather than a random episode in the middle. Thus, the recap is needed to understand the journey that brought us to this point. Even the most boring seasons like “Survivor Fiji”, or the most predictable seasons like “Survivor Redemption Island”, there was at least a reason why we needed that journey. Even if we already knew or didn’t care about the outcome, we still needed the guidance of the rest of the season to understand that outcome. Here, someone tuning in for just this episode, even without a season recap, would lose nothing. They could watch it, and get just as much out of it as someone who had followed the entire season. And if 12/13 episodes of your season don’t need to be watched, what was the point of having the season at all?

Now, I hear the counterargument to this already: “Chris did have a story. It was just all on Edge of Extinction. And weren’t you, Matt, one of the ones praising the show for not spending so much time on Edge of Extinction?” You’re right about that, but it doesn’t change the fact that it retroactively makes the season pointless. Of course, we wouldn’t want the show to devote more time to the Edge of Extinction than to people still in the game, but then, if one of those people wins, it feels hollow. The only solution I can really think of to satisfy both worlds would be to have made the segments of “Edge of Extinction” its own show. Have it air right after “Survivor”, and be all about the social dynamics of the Edge of Extinction, with the finale being a kind of crossover between those two shows. Then we might have had time to develop everyone as needed to make a satisfying finale. Now, this would never happen. While “Survivor” has an impressive longevity, it must be said that the heyday of the show is passed, and so CBS is not logically going to devote an entire timeslot to a companion show no one is guaranteed to watch. However, if we’re trying to find a way for this twist to work, this is the only way I can think of. As it stands, this twist is a terrible idea that moves “Survivor” to a point where it isn’t recognizable as “Survivor” any more. Because it is such a different animal, and renders the vast majority of the season as being pointless, there is no logical place for this season to go other than the very bottom of the rankings.

Probably the biggest disappointment of all here, though, is that the season did not have to be this way. Not even close. It’s not like something like the aforementioned “Survivor Fiji”, where the cast mean the season was doomed before they even started filming. This cast had potential. As I said, there were a lot of intriguing new players this time around. But with so much time devoted to returning players, advantages, and the Edge of Extinction itself, they just get shunted aside. Thus, we cannot bond with them, or the season. Really, ALL the players on this season deserved a better season than what they got, and shame on CBS for taking something good and doing everything in their power to ruin it.

Ok, ok, let’s talk about something that actually goes WELL this season: The Reunion show. Still too little time devoted to it, but we talk with most of the important people, get a comment on most everyone, and most importantly, fewer pointless Probst segments. No audience interviews, no kid guessing the obvious winner. Hell, the only former player we see is a brief glimpse of Cochran, and then it’s at a relevant time to mention him. Yeah, I really don’t have any complaints about this particular reunion show, again apart from the length.

As to the upcoming season, it can only be an improvement. If you’re going to bring back returning players with new players, I think keeping the new players out of the competition is the way to do it. They can add flavor to the season this way, but also are less likely to dominate screen time as a result. It’s not a guarantee, so I’m holding my judgment until the season proper, and I am concerned about the lack of new player confessionals in the preview. Plus, getting advice from old players might encourage new players to ape their style, rather than going their own way. Still, there’s potential for good here, and those giant heads are just the kind of cheesy I can get behind, so I’ll give this season a fair shake. Now, onto discussing how my pre-season opinions matched up to reality, starting with:

Dan-Right on personality, wrong on time in the game. He made himself more necessary than I thought he would, and was smarter than I gave him credit for. That said, I count this one as a loss for me.

Reem-Overall right, though she was definitely feistier than I gave her credit for.

Rick-Pretty much right here, though I didn’t call his ending up on Edge of Extinction.

Wendy-Again, pretty well nailed the personality, though she was out earlier than I expected.

Lauren-Despite my saying she had more game than she gets credit for, I still say her personality was on point. Name one thing about her that wasn’t related to Kelley Wentworth. I’ll wait. Oh, and she lasted longer than I would have thought.

Keith-I’m seeing a trend here. Keith is yet another one where I called his personality, but was vastly wrong on his time in the game.

Chris-Wrong. Out earlier than I expected, but also had more game than I expected as well.

Victoria-She made it longer than I guessed, but I’d say I was right overall.

Ron-Wrong. Much more socially aware, and as a result longer-lived, than I ever anticipated.

Julia-Probably the only one on this list where I hit the nail on the head for both personality and time in the game.

Eric-Pretty much right, though I think I gave him too much credit in the “smarts” department.

Aurora-She made herself overall more low-key, at least pre-merge, and so lasted longer than I expert suspected she would. Good for her.

Julie-Wrong. Much less domineering, and much longer-lived than I gave her credit for.

Gavin-A little bit longer-lived than I expected, but Gavin fell pretty close to what I thought otherwise.

Kelley-Right, though as returnees are easier to predict, having seen their previous gameplay, I only consider this a half-win at best.

Joe-Right on vote-out time, wrong on his coming back to win the whole thing.

Aubry-Wrong. I’m not sure how much time is needed for people to think of her more as “Survivor Game Changers” Aubry rather than “Survivor Kaoh Rong” Aubry, but clearly, it’s not enough.

David-Wrong. Dude managed to hang in there better than I expected. How is it people remember Aubry’s (earlier) performance better than David’s?

This would normally be the point where I end the blog. However, loathe though I am to admit it, and however little this season deserves it, it’s time for another:

TOP 5 AND BOTTOM 5

Let’s talk about moves. They need to be made on “Survivor”. Even choosing to not make a move is, in and of itself, making a move. As such, one can usually point to a winner’s moves to explain how they won the game. We’ll be talking about the best actions winners have taken, while also acknowledging those moves that SHOULD have ruined winners games, but they were able to come back from. A couple of ground rules: The move has to be from the season the winner won on. I could vilify Cochran’s flip on “Survivor South Pacific”, but that has no bearing on his win on “Survivor Caramoan”. Second ground rule: It has to be one specific move. Something a winner did overall, such as their social game, isn’t the subject of this list. That said, let’s start with the best of the best, with…

TOP 5

5. Boran Throws the Challenge (“Survivor Africa”): Technically cheating a bit here, since this was a move by a tribe, not just by the winner. However, Ethan seemed to be the one spearheading this move, and it’s my list, so I’ll count it. It was definitely a risk, and I’m normally the first to come out against throwing a challenge, but it cannot be denied that this worked out well for Ethan. It kept his allies on Samburu safe, built trust with T-Bird and Frank, and pretty much decimated any hope of the old Samburu coming back together as a unified whole. Maybe not Ethan’s move alone, but definitely one that helps ensure his victory.

4. Tom Mind-Screws Ian (“Survivor Palau”): At this point in the game, Tom’s only competition was Ian. True, he probably wins the game no matter who he’s against, but it’s much more up in the air against Ian than anyone else. When the plan to oust Ian at the final four goes awry, Tom now has little choice but to duke it out against a younger competitor at an endurance challenge. No mean feat to win. So Tom, to ensure his victory, preys on Ian’s guilt, and gets in his head to the point where Ian gives up, handing Tom victory on that season, and a spot on this list. Again, I keep him low because I think he had it won regardless, but it was a good bit of insurance, just in case.

3. “Please, take this risk.” (“Survivor Vanuatu”): This, frankly, is the reason why Chris Daugherty is a winner. The man had tried and failed multiple times to break up the women, usually at the expense of Eliza. It was only when he had the brainwave to USE Eliza, rather than target her, that finally got him success, and overcome a 6-1 deficit to win. Admittedly, the idea was Scout’s, which is why Chris doesn’t land higher on this list, but without Chris’ salesmanship, it wouldn’t have worked, so he deserves some credit. Also, this means that Chris from this season now hold the distinction of being the second person to win who shares a first name with a previous winner (Natalie White of “Survivor Samoa” and Natalie Anderson of “Survivor San Juan del Sur” being the first pair to do so).

2. “Coach is gunning for you.” (“Survivor Heroes vs. Villains”): Aw yeah, now we get to talk about the awesomeness that is Sandra! For those who say her game was all about doing nothing, this is my counter-argument. She and Courtney Yates, her only ally, were dead in the water. But one simple conversation with Russell Hantz, and suddenly that paranoia makes neither of them a major target. As Sandra doesn’t even make the merge without this move, it’s safe to say it won her the game, as well as a spot on this list.

1. The Buddy System (“Survivor Redemption Island”): Look, I never said this season had no redeeming features. I just said they were drowned in a sea of mediocrity. That said, it cannot be denied that Boston Rob had a good strategy here. By isolating everyone so that his sycophants would never think of flipping, he managed to maintain his iron grip on the tribe, even when up against players better than what he had in the pre-merge. It made the season boring and predictable, but it cannot be denied it was good strategy.

Honorable Mention: J.T.’s Crocodile Tears (“Survivor Tocantins”): You may remember that J.T. gave quite the performance at the “Survivor Tocantins” final tribal council. Acting indignant and hurt at Stephen’s supposed “betrayal”. I even saw some tears there. There’s a reason J.T. was the second shut-out victory in the history of the show, but I keep this off the list proper because I can guarantee that J.T. wins the game even without this. Stephen was respected by the jury, but wasn’t worshipped like J.T. was, so all J.T. did was humiliate Stephen still further. Unnecessary, J.T. “Survivor Cambodia” would do that well enough.

BOTTOM 5

5. Jenna’s Emotional Breakdown (“Survivor The Amazon”): I’ll admit, I’m a bit reluctant to mark someone down for showing emotion on “Survivor”. That said, the fact remains that Jenna’s breakdown at the final five did her no favors. When it’s kind of a coin toss between you and your ally as to who goes home, telling people you’re ready to go is not a good look. I keep it this low on the list because I don’t think Jenna made this as a “move” per se, but not having as good control on the emotions is a mark against a potential winner, as we saw with Julie this season.

4. Sandra Throws Out the Fish (“Survivor Pearl Islands”): Yes, for all that we must praise Sandra for her awesomeness, we must also point out where she messed up. Sabotaging the tribe, especially in the early seasons of the show, was often a death sentence. Moreover, Sandra was doing this out of petty revenge for the betrayal of Rupert, rather than any strategic reasoning. It would be one thing if Sandra had intentionally tried to cover her tracks, but she just got lucky that Christa took the fall. If she hadn’t, Sandra might well have been gone out of sheer frustration from the tribe. Sandra is still awesome, but she’s lucky this move didn’t backfire on her.

3. Final 6 Rock Draw (“Survivor Blood vs. Water”): I keep this one from higher on the list because I see little Tyson could have done in this situation to prevent this, save keep a tighter grip on Ciera. That said, not having your allies in check is a sin even Tyson is not exempt from. This move really could have cost him the game had he drawn the wrong rock. True, the risk was greater for the other alliance (two members drawing rocks as opposed to one), but still, if Tyson draws the wrong rock, that season is never the same. Too much of a risk, so it earns a spot on this list.

2. Mike and the Auction (“Survivor Worlds Apart”): While Tyson’s move had the CHANCE of him going home, I’m AMAZED this didn’t send Mike home. For starters, the idea itself is bad. Going back on a deal YOU YOURSELF suggested makes you look like a dick, especially since it involves messages from home, which are always emotionally charged. No advantage is worth that in a social game like “Survivor”. But then Mike doubles down on the idiocy by then following through on the deal, meaning he gets no upside. People hate you for trying to backstab them publicly, and you don’t even get the advantage you were going for in the first place. It’s only through the grace of immunity that Mike won. This really should have cost him the game.

1. Chris Trusts Wardog (“Survivor Edge of Extinction”): This one’s a no-brainer. The only thing worse than a winner making a move that could POTENTIALLY get them voted off is them making a move that ACTUALLY votes them off. A person who wins despite their mistake costing them their spot in the game is the type of winner I just can’t get behind, if I haven’t already made that clear.

Honorable Mention: MAD (“Survivor Millennials vs. Gen-X”): I keep this one off the list proper because the idea was good. Take someone you want as an ally, and share secrets so you both have an incentive to stay aligned. This is what Adam did with Taylor regarding their various advantages (a reward steal for Adam, plus hidden food for Taylor). The flaw here is that Taylor is not exactly playing what we might call a “strategic” game, and thus has no incentive to worry about messing up his own game. Thus, he outs Adam’s deception, and Adam comes off looking the worse for it. I even wrote at the time that Adam had torpedoed his own chances of winning with this move, so it must be talked about here.

At long last, we come to the end of this season, and good riddance. I’ll say it before, and I’ll say it again: everyone involved deserved a better season. We had a cast that, while not the stuff of legend, was definitely solid and could have developed good future returnees. However, a combination of too much focus on the returnees, too many advantages, time taken away for the Edge of Extinction, and a winner who only really showed up in the last episode, means this season doesn’t really even count as “Survivor”. If it must, though, it’s the very bottom of the “Survivor” pile. At least we get a nice long break before the next season. That’ll give us time to get invested again.

But what of this blog during the off-season? Don’t worry, content will still come, but don’t expect the return of “Survivor Retrospectives” yet. Don’t worry, I still intend to finish, but they take a lot of work, and I’m just burnt out on them at the moment. That said, I’ve had a couple of ideas for new blog topics, including one feature I hope to make a regular thing, that I’ll be rolling out over the summer, and I hope you enjoy them.

Let’s end this on a high note. One positive I can say for the season: NO PLAYERS BREAKING INTO MY HOUSE! Yes, the tradition of “Idol Speculation” is finally broken, and no players have busted down my wall insisting on an audience, and closing me a lot in repairs. At last, I can go one season without calling a contractor…

CRASH!

RICK: DUN-DUN-DA-DA-DAH! DUN-DUN-DUN-DUN!

MATT: GAAAAAAAAAAH!

-Matt

Title Credit to Jean Storrs.

Idol Speculation: “Survivor Edge of Extinction” Episode 12: Toy Story

I’ve got idols with me/I’ve got idols with me
Advantages/I’ve got ‘em too
‘Cause Production/Likes me more than you.
When I win/You’ll all be feeling blue
‘Cause I’ve got idols with me!

Well, I’ll give the episode this: It at least gave me the chance to make another song parody. That very few people will get, as I doubt the overlap between “Survivor” fans and “Toy Story” fans is particularly large. Still, it’s a positive, and the episode should take what it can get. It won’t be getting very many compliments for this particular one.

We start off back at camp, with everyone discussing the previous vote-out. Gavin gets a bit of character development talking about his conflict in voting out Ron, but steels himself for future votes. He talks about how Rick is now the big threat who needs to go under any circumstances, thereby ensuring that Rick will stay this episode. He also mentions that Rick gets “All the best toys”, thereby at least giving me title fodder for this blog. Rick tells what at first seems like a pointless lie, claiming that his idol came from someone on the Edge of Extinction, rather than just being one he found. As soon as I wonder about the point of it all, though, Rick justifies himself in confessional, stating that this makes people think idols aren’t hidden around camp, thus preventing others from looking for the re-hidden immunity idol. Pretty good justification, but I’d point out that at least Lauren should be aware that this is bull, since she HAS found idols at camp previously. I’m pretty sure Rick isn’t aware of it, though, and Lauren could be justified in keeping quiet due to not wanting to reveal her idol, so not a bad play on his part.

Rick naturally gets up early and starts idol hunting. Not being quick enough, everyone notes his absence. Aurora talks about wanting Rick out, and rejoices in the fact that she finally has an alliance that seems solid. And with that, we know the outcome of the episode with absolute certainty! Good night, everybody!

Look, I know I rail against too little foreshadowing all the time, but too much can be just as bad. By setting up these obvious storylines SO EARLY in the episode, it just took the tension out of it. This could have been rectified by an interesting journey as to how we got to the outcome, or good character moments, but the journey itself just isn’t interesting. They TRY to give us the latter, but for some reason, with so many people left, it just doesn’t work. Huh. It’s almost like THE GAME ISN’T DESIGNED TO HAVE NEARLY EVERYBODY LEFT AT THE END! MAYBE THIS WAS A HORRIBLE IDEA FROM THE START!

Ok, ok, rant over. I evidently didn’t give Lauren enough credit, as she does call Rick out on his bluff, both to him and everyone else left. She frames it as a “gut feeling”, thus keeping her hidden immunity idol, well, hidden, but it’s well-done nonetheless. I’m all ready to praise Lauren for keeping a good tail on Rick thus preventing him from finding his hidden immunity idol… And then she just up and leaves. Loss of smart-person points, Lauren. Sure enough, the dramatic music tells us Rick finds an idol. At least the episode was QUICK to point out how things wouldn’t go as planned. Rick tries to do his news anchor schtick again, but his giddy enthusiasm boils over, and it just comes across as forced this time. Patience, Rick, patience.

It’s saying something when the best aspect of this episode is the challenge, and not just the challenge, but the REWARD CHALLENGE! My God, we actually get something original in it! True, it’s our same generic obstacle course with digging under a pole and tossing balls onto an arch, but the first leg has players throwing a ball into a ramp, which they must run through some ropes to the other end of. If they catch the ball, it’s good. If not, try again. It’s creative, it works well in the challenge, it keeps things individual! By this season’s standards, it’s gold!

After a four-way race between Gavin, Rick, Aurora, and Victoria, Gavin “wins”. I put this in quotation marks because, although technically victorious, he now has to decide who to offend by not taking them on reward. True, it’s not as bad as when the same thing is done on the family challenge, but still decently bad. Gavin first picks Victoria to take on the picnic with him, which is solid. She’s both his ally, and someone shown to hold a grudge over not being picked, at least according to last episode. But then, Gavin fumbles it with his second pick: Lauren. The others are astounded that Aurora wasn’t picked, and frankly so am I. Both are in Gavin’s alliance at the moment, so it’s not the most illogical pick, but let’s consider the choices. Gavin can take Lauren, the person who’s the only non-Rick original Manu left, and therefore has little option BUT to stick with you, or Aurora, who’s been pretty much a free agent this season, and is KNOWN to hold grudges based on her feelings. Who needs to be coddled more?

After the requisite “Ha Ha, screw you!” helicopter fly-by of camp, we cut to our feast, where Gavin broaches the possibility of Rick being immune. He suggests, should this happen, that Julie get the votes, which makes a certain amount of sense. She’s not much of a threat in any regard at this point, but might have a couple of friends on the jury (Eric, Ron), and was the other person left out. Thus, easy consensus vote. I’m not sure she’s the SMARTEST choice at this juncture, but we’ll get to that. Lauren, however, is again one step ahead, saying privately that she has a bond with Julie (that we’ve never seen before this episode), and might want to try and find another plan. Yep. Same amount of subtlety we’ve come to expect from this episode.

Getting back to camp, Rick does what EVERYONE who finds an idol should do: Make like you’re still searching so no one catches on that you’ve found it. Rick again takes childlike glee in giving everyone the slip, and it’s here we learn the TRUE lesson of the episode: Lauren is Satan. Yes, you heard me right, Satan. Only the Lord of Darkness himself could dislike the game of “Hide and Seek”. It’s the best childhood game ever. Shame on you for disliking it, Lauren!

Oh good, the Edge of Extinction. So nice to see you after missing you last episode. It wasn’t long enough.

Ok, ok, I’ll be fair to the Edge of Extinction. It actually had kind of a fun idea this time around. Rather than looking for an advantage, those on the Edge of Extinction get to read notes they wrote to themselves prior to the beginning of the game. This is something we’ve never seen before, but it fits really well here, giving everyone a chance to look back on their journey, reflect on how far they still have to go, and talk about how they’ve grown as people. At least, that’s what SHOULD have happened, but it seems the overcrowding from the Edge of Extinction is now affecting even those on the Edge of Extinction. Rather than hearing excerpts from each person’s note, we get a montage. In some cases, where we get a bit of content from the person in question, it really works. Julia and Reem are prime examples of this. But most everyone else? It goes by too fast to build an emotional connection, and we’re just left wondering why we had to have this at all, if it’s relatively pointless?

Moving on to our immunity challenge, which is that “Slide tiles and carry them over balance things to solve a word puzzle” challenge, first seen on “Survivor Worlds Apart”. Probst claims it’s a common backyard game. I don’t know what backyards are like in Texas, but I’ve never seen a game even CLOSE to this anywhere but “Survivor”. If there’s something I’m missing, please enlighten me. It’s your standard dull, reused challenge, and yes, I realize that statement is redundant. I can at least say that the puzzle solution is good. “Not Living on the Edge tonight”. Fits with the season, but not completely obvious.

Surprising no one with a functioning brain, Rick wins, after Probst gives a fairly subtle hint to get people to the word “Tonight”. Julie, recognizing that she’s probably in trouble, makes a show about going off to talk with Rick. The pair decide to target Aurora, because as mentioned, she’s kind of the default target at this point for any alliance. Speculating on who they can get to help them out, Julie mentions her “bond” with Lauren that, as mentioned previously, was not brought up prior to this episode. Still, Lauren is open to the idea, and discusses with Gavin the possibility. Gavin is less closed off than he was to getting out Ron last episode, indicating that he’ll probably go along with the plan, but he wants Victoria in on it. In case Lauren wasn’t obvious enough, she keeps hinting how she’s willing to go with just Gavin, and they don’t need Victoria. Victoria, not being an idiot, realizes this means Lauren probably wants to go to the end with Julie, and thus getting out Julie might be a better bet. Victoria keeps herself open to the possibilities, though, as she should. As to which one she should go for, the answer right now is clearly Aurora. As mentioned, she’s more of a challenge threat, but also think about the Edge of Extinction. Whoever comes back next episode, they’re likely to have an uphill battle, since almost no one left would want to work with them. Aurora, as a relatively free agent, is a godsend to them. Thus, you get her out, whoever comes back has little foothold, barring another game-breaking advantage. This is only the right move for now, though, as we shall see soon at Tribal Council.

Talk at Tribal Council is pretty much all about how Rick is the one everyone wants out, and it sucks that he won. This leads Rick to try and get back at everyone, pulling out his hidden immunity idol and saying he’ll play it for Julie. I’m not buying it. Unless the idol expires at this Tribal Council (which, admittedly, it might), there’s no reason for Rick to risk it when in all likelihood Julie joins in voting him out should he not win the next immunity. What this DOES do is incentivize others to vote for Julie. Yeah, for all the good points voting for Aurora has, a chance to flush an idol trumps them. Rick, unfortunately, finds himself in the position of the “Three Amigos” on “Survivor Caramoan”, as by unveiling an idol, he now has to play it, or risk losing an ally. It’s too easy a bluff to call.

Evidently calling an easy bluff is too much for this cast. Aurora is predictably sent home, and I’m kind of sorry. Both she and Julie would be losses to this season, but Aurora was the slightly bigger character, and more intriguing, as she rarely had a formal alliance. She goes out with class, though still swearing vengeance against Rick. Vengeance she might get as she, like everyone else, heads to the Edge of Extinction. Ok, while I’m HAPPY no one just gave up on the game, it’s still annoying that we had to see the non-dilemma every time. After Keith, nothing could compare.

In case it wasn’t clear, I am not partial to this episode. It was predictable, and gave us nothing in return. Thus boring, lame, and with little to do but write song parodies about it. Let’s hope this downward trend doesn’t continue into the finale.

Speaking of which, this is normally where I’d talk about those who are left, and their odds of winning the game, should they get to the end. Well, I’m not doing that this season, mainly because we don’t know who all is coming back from the Edge of Extinction. To give you my general thoughts, those coming back from the Edge of Extinction have the best chance of winning in the end, but the hardest time getting there. Then there’s everyone else, who seem like nice enough people, but cluster in their ball of blandness to not stand out at all. Instead, let’s live up to the “Speculation” part of this blog’s name, as I give you:

MATT’S TOP 5 PEOPLE WHO MIGHT COME BACK FROM THE EDGE OF EXTINCTION!

Yes, this will not be a proper “Top 5 and Bottom 5” but will follow the format of one. Now that we’ve finalized who all has a shot to come back, let’s discuss the people I think have the best odds, based both of edit and on challenge performance. We begin with…

5. Chris-Maybe a bit of a stretch, but Chris has been presented as a challenge beast from the beginning, and he nails the editing part of it as well. We’ve seen a fair amount of Chris after his exit, which is partly due to his length of time on the Edge of Extinction, but he’s gotten a lot of confessionals about his “Perfect Game” failure, which seems like a story to be set up for the finale. However, Chris only gets number five, because I would have put him much higher before tonight. The trouble is that I feel like his note scene may have wrapped up his story arc, and may spell doom for the man come the challenge.

4. Joe-Yeah, it wasn’t going to be a list about challenges without Joey Amazing showing up SOMEWHERE. If this list were based purely on challenge ability, he wins hands down. Joe is favored to win most challenges, and things like a ropes course, which we know will be in the challenge, are right up his alley. So, why is he only number four? Well, as I said before, I’m counting edit here as well, and have we heard from Joe at all since his boot episode? That’s what I thought. That severely decreases his odds, though challenge performance alone is enough to keep him on the list.

3. David-Out of all the returnees, David’s is the only one whose exit didn’t feel satisfying. Aubry and Kelley both got done in by their hubris, and Joe just underestimated his opponents. All flaws that we can understand. David? Just bad luck with the numbers, and that just feels unsatisfying for a returnee. Add onto that returnees being favored in most challenges due to greater familiarity, and this challenge favoring the tiny, and I think David’s got a decent shot at returning. If we’d heard from him more after his boot, he’d probably be number one.

2. Aurora-Aurora has what we might call “Andrea Boehlke Upside” from “Survivor Redemption Island”. A tough challenge competitor voted out close enough to the end that she has more energy than most of her opponents, and again, coming into a challenge that plays to her strengths. Her comment about getting Rick out also strikes me as potentially prophetic, so I’d give her pretty good odds of returning overall.

1. Aubry-Perhaps this is just wishful thinking on my part, since I love Aubry as a player and want her to do well on this season, but I keep coming back to a couple of things that make me see her as the returnee from the twist. She has returning player upside, to be sure, but we also saw a decent amount of her well beyond her boot episode. Granted, we’ve seen pretty much nothing of her these last few episodes, but since most of our time is just devoted to the newest person on the island, that’s unsurprising. Two things come back to me that make me favor Aubry. One is the chance to practice the challenge. It not only gives her an edge physically, but an edge psychologically, as she won’t be as shocked as the others by the challenge itself. The other is the “Aubry is out for blood” comment from the first “Back from Edge of Extinction” challenge. While Aubry’s story FELT like it concluded with her exit, this opened it back up again, and I feel it needs to be resolved, which it can only do if Aubry comes back.

Honorable Mention: Reem-Going purely on confessionals, Reem would be the person to re-enter the game. She’s been the most consistent narrator of the Edge of Extinction, and on a certain level, it would be poetic justice for the first boot to re-enter the game. That said, this challenge doesn’t particularly favor Reem, and her confessional count seems more due to her giving a great confessional than hinting at a return. Still would be fun, though.

So, what do you all think? Who’s going to come back from Edge of Extinction? Let me know your GUESS in the comments below. Spoilers will not be approved, and will be afforded a special level of hell, along with those people who talk in the theater.

That said, you’re going to have to wait for your weekly dose of “Idol Speculation” next week. As previously mentioned, I have a new job, meaning I don’t have vacation yet, and can’t call off of work following the finale. This means I can’t stay up to write the blog and still go to work, so it will have to wait for the afternoon after. I swear to not read any blogs or take in any new opinions until I get mine down on data. See you when that happens!

-Matt

Title Credit to Jean Storrs.

Idol Speculation: “Survivor Edge of Extinction” Episode 11: The Wild Devans in its Natural Habitat

On tonight’s episode of “Survivor”, we will be forgoing the game to bring you more educational content. Our subject for this evening: Rick Devans. Formerly a species on the edge of extinction, a difficult breeding program has allowed it to be reintroduced into the environment. Despite many threats from predators, it now thrives, using its unique talents to save itself from destruction.

Skipping out on the “Previously On…” segment once again, we jump straight to damage control. Specifically, damage control on Rick, since he’s about the only person left out of the loop after the previous vote. You can tell that Rick is ANGRY in the confessionals, but his anger is directed specifically at Ron, who has now lied to Rick twice. Naturally, this makes Ron the BEST possible choice to calm down Rick. To be fair, Rick actually does a spectacular job of hiding his anger outside of confessional, and Ron does have one advantage in winning back Rick. Specifically, he has the expired advantage menu, which he gives to Rick as a sign of trust. Presumably he cut off the expiration date so that Rick can’t tell that it’s a fake from just looking at it, but the suspiciousness of the scenario alone, coupled with Rick needing to state what advantage he uses pre Tribal Council (or at least, so I assumed at the time), should clue Rick in instantly. Rick, however, seems to overall fall for it, calling it his bargaining chip. That said, Rick doesn’t immediately fully trust Ron or the advantage, however, so point for him in that respect.

Moving right along, we get our loved one’s challenge, but more importantly we get an ACTUAL INDIVIDUAL CHALLENGE POST-MERGE! STARS BE PRAISED, WE MAY ACTUALLY SEE SOME TOUGH CHOICES BEING MADE, AND AN EXCITING CHALLENGE THAT CAN ONLY BE DONE IN THIS PHASE OF THE GAME! Since the challenge is clearly the most important part here, let me briefly address how it works. One member of a player/loved one pair will run to the water, collecting it in a bucket. They will then toss that water at another bucket, held by their loved one, who dump it into yet another bucket, trying to weigh it down enough to raise a flag, the first one to do so winning a picnic lunch at camp, because you know, this challenge didn’t piss people off enough if they don’t win. You just had to rub it in their faces afterward as well. As Probst correctly mentions, this specific challenge hails from “Survivor Heroes vs Villains”. You may remember it as that one challenge where Colby (“Survivor The Australian Outback”) went apeshit on his brother, despite Colby himself not exactly being a challenge god that season. That moment will be hard to top, but I will say that I overall like this version of the challenge better, due to one simple change: The players now do the running instead of the loved ones. While I do like that this challenge hinges less on strength and more on throwing technique, it’s better to have the players we’ve spent time bonding with (or at least SHOULD have been bonding with were it not for pointless, time-wasting twists) doing the more active part of the challenge. Keeps us more invested.

The majority of our loved ones here are nothing more than your mildly touching reunion, but there are a few worth commenting on. First off, we have Ron’s husband, Lloyd. Ron, my man, you have done well for yourself. I’m straight, but that is a damn handsome man! Second of all, this is the first time I believe Ron’s sexuality has actually been brought up on the show. Don’t misunderstand me here: Long gone are the days when “The Gay Guy” was used as a marketing technique for the show, but not bringing it up at all until it becomes relevant (as opposed to someone like Aurora, whose sexuality WAS brought up before now, if not emphasized) shows a maturity that makes me still like the show, even to this day. It’s also nice to see that non-straight sexualities are being more and more normalized in mainstream media, especially since it’s come to my attention that BOTH kisses between Ami, Scout, and their partners were censored from “Survivor Vanuatu”. Particularly hypocritical when you consider they showed Rupert and Laura Boneham trying to eat each other on the previous season. Second is Victoria’s father, Troyzan (“Survivor One World”). Wow, really? Four returnees just wasn’t enough? Seriously, give that guy longer hair, and he’s Troyzan, no questions asked. But of course, the real show stopper here is Gavin, where we’re reminded yet again that he left his wife TWO FREAKING DAYS after marriage to go play “Survivor”. If there isn’t a medal for what this woman’s going through, there should be. Few things take precedence over “Survivor” in my book, but a new marriage is definitely one of them. Predictable, since this story was well-publicized pre-season, but still emotionally impactful nonetheless.

Oh, and I was also pleased to see so many married couples on this time, since “Survivor” especially in recent seasons, loves to cast singles in the hope of a showmance. This is hardly the most married players we’ve had left in the game at this point. I believe “Survivor Thailand” still holds that honor, with 6 out of 7 players being married, but still, this season is no slouch in that department.

Ron wins, and is of course faced with the choice of who to take with him on reward, and by extension, who to leave pissed off back at camp. Ron chooses to take Julie and Gavin with him on reward, which I can’t fault, despite what we’ll see later. Ron is in the power position, but unlike some other seasons, it’s pretty clear who he’s with and who he’s not with. His core foursome is himself, Julie, Gavin, and Victoria, with Rick as a side thing, but he doesn’t want to make that too obvious. Lauren and Aurora. Not needed, and given that display Gavin pulled, I think Ron has a pretty well built-in excuse for why he chose Gavin over someone else. I don’t even buy it when Victoria talks about how this was a mistake for Ron. She says the words but her heart’s just not in it. Clearly she’s ok, and is just playing it up for the show.

We get sweet moments between Gavin, Julie, and their loved ones at the picnic, but the one that takes the cake here is Ron. He does what all us fans would do in his position: Brag to the loved one about all the awesome stuff we’ve done in the game so far. Ron of course rhapsodizes about his strategic accomplishments, and how he’s been able to play both sides, and have everyone wrapped around his fingers, and good lord, the hubris is so thick you could cut it with a knife here! Why, Ron even talks about how taking Gavin was pure strategy, and no emotion. Just when you thought we might actually have a nuanced character here!

Finishing up, we return to camp, where Devans is conspicuous by his absence, being out looking for an idol instead. Intent on flushing such a possible idol, those at the camp, and Aurora in particular, set to looking through Rick’s bag. A sudden return and call-out by Rick puts their plan on hold, but Rick is not one to let this lie. He continues to comment about how awkward the whole situation is, hoping the shame and awkwardness will sway the camp against Aurora. This was a solid plan… 35 seasons ago. The trouble for Rick is that searching through someone else’s bag has lost what little stigma it once had, and now is just “You were dumb enough to leave something important in your bag, so shame on you.”. Thus, Aurora has every right to feel fine with having done so. Rick projects awkwardness onto her simply because awkwardness is Rick’s natural state of being.

Still, there is some good to be said for Rick here. After putting a bug in Ron’s ear about Aurora’s behavior, which is about as consequential as you’d expect, he decides to lean into the narrative written for him, and be brazen in his search for an idol. He eventually finds a clue, telling him the idol is hidden in the rafters of the shelter. I will give credit that at least THIS idol takes more than just getting people out of camp to get. Something like the idol Kelley Wentworth found (the second one) on “Survivor Cambodia” was easily grabbed in 30 seconds, and only needed patience for the opportune moment. Here, you have to climb a tree for the idol thus taking up more time and effort than some other idols. Rick initially wants to go full Mike Holloway (“Survivor Worlds Apart”), and just go for it out in the open, but his better instincts take over, and he waits for the cover of darkness. Surprisingly, no one bothers to check on the loud sounds of Rick Devans climbing a tree in the dead of night, and thus he gets away with it. Good for him.

Actually, for all my snark, Rick really is playing the “Mike Holloway” game at this point. Everyone’s out to get him, no one’s making it a secret, and so he’s just being blatantly funny and crazy because why not at that point?

Naturally, with two great challenges in a row, counting the immunity challenge from last episode, our fun exponentially increases with the greatest challenge yet! A spectacular contest, to be immortalized in the annals of “Survivor” History as… Yeah, it’s yet another bland endurance challenge. Specifically, it’s the one about supporting yourself in a box from “Survivor Fiji”. We don’t even get any mystery that the challenge will matter, with Rick being the first one out. Gavin ultimately wins, but it matters little in the grand scheme of things. No one will talk to Rick prior to Tribal Council, with Ron and Julie only making what could be best described as a token effort at doing so. As such, it is pretty much guaranteed that Rick is safe tonight. Thus, we need alternate plans. Ron and Julie discuss actually going for Aurora, but again, not buying it. Too little enthusiasm, and too predictable a plotline. However, it seems Victoria was indeed a bit more pissed that she initially let on. With both her and Lauren correctly predicting that Rick might play an idol, they decide they don’t want anyone else dictating who goes home. They decide on Ron, which by and large makes sense, since Ron’s the power player, and arguably the frontrunner to win at this point, outside of Rick. Less good is their idea to float this to Gavin. Apart from feeling indebted to Ron after the reward challenge, Gavin is not sure getting Ron out at this juncture is a good idea. And for him, it isn’t. Gavin is clearly a member of the majority at this point, and one with some influence, but not so much as to be the main target when insurrection comes. Almost the ideal position: To be seen as helping with moves, while not taking blame for the fallout. A sweet deal, to be sure, and one not to be given up lightly.

Aurora, therefore, tries to sweeten the pot. Wanting her extra vote to be used, as this is the last night it can be used, she gives it to Gavin, since, as he’s immune, he could use it on the revote as well. Ok, that logic I get, but Aurora, you act like you’ll get credit for this. You won’t. Gavin will. Yes, it’s good to avoid being voted out with an unused advantage, but how is this in ANY WAY helping your game. At least it does a good job making things more exciting as we head off to Tribal Council, good gameplay or not.

It is quickly topped, however, by Rick leading us into Tribal Council with a fake news headline about his impending fate. I would give you a blow-by-blow of what he says, but I’m too busy being pissed that this could have been the lead-in to EVERY Tribal Council, and we haven’t got it yet. For shame, CBS!

Without a doubt, this is one of the most blunt Tribal Councils I’ve seen in quite some time. Everyone makes no secret of Rick going, and while it looses some of the intrigue as a result, it does make up for it in sheer gumption. You can’t help but watch fascinated as everyone makes it clear who they intend to vote for. Unsurprisingly, this causes Rick to play first the expired advantage menu. Not one to let an opportunity like this lie, Rick calls out Ron and Julie on this, thus making them look bad, and giving Rick options for his future. How does he stick around? Well, despite my thought that playing a fake advantage might prevent playing real ones at the same Tribal Council, to prevent the flushing of fake advantages, Rick is allowed to play his actual immunity idol. Even THEN, though, Rick cannot be on the proper side of the vote. His vote for Aurora pales in comparison to the three votes Ron gets (one from Lauren, two from Gavin, using Aurora’s advantage), thus sealing his fate. He takes it with good grace, but I’ve got mixed feelings on Ron leaving. I never connected with him much as a character before this episode, and with all that hubris, he did kind of deserve it. That said, Ron was a major driver of strategy this season, and I feel the caliber may go down as a result of his exit.

That said, the caliber of the season continues to go up. Despite the poor misdirection, this episode did a fantastic job of showing us the ins and outs of this group of contestants, the loved ones brought needed emotion, and overall we got some really good gameplay from pretty much all of our parties. Say, you know what was missing in this episode? Why the Edge of Extinction of course! When we stop spending our time with the people who already lost, we can actually LIKE and BOND WITH this group of players! Who would have guessed?

-Matt

Title Credit to Jean Storrs.