“Survivor” Retrospective: Blood vs. Water

Writing these “‘Survivor’ Retrospectives” blogs may give me whiplash. While seasons are connected to one another in terms of history, very often two seasons will tell very different tales. Case in point: having “Survivor Blood vs. Water” come right after “Survivor Caramoan”. As I talked about in my previous blog, “Survivor Caramoan” was in many ways a season of retreads. We had previously used twists, a previously used location, and even previously used contestants, most of whom were disliked. With “Survivor Blood vs. Water”, we have a truly innovative twist, many new ideas being sprung on us at once, and a cast that is maybe no more original than “Survivor Caramoan”, holds up a whole lot better to scrutiny, for reasons that I’ll get into shortly. Point being, where “Survivor Caramoan” tread on sacred ground, “Survivor Blood vs. Water” dared to blaze a new train and explore heretofore unknown territory. Always a gamble, but did it pay off?

To find out, though, you must first sit through my spoiler warning. Be aware that I write this blog from the perspective of someone, having already seen the show, talking to a person equally in the know about the ins and outs of this season. The idea is to individually scrutinize each element that makes up a season, see what works and doesn’t for this season, and talk about how it all comes together and why it works or does not. Don’t worry if you’re just looking for a spoiler-free recommendation, though. If you scroll to the very bottom of this page, I have an “Abstract” section, which is just what you’re looking for. So, once you’ve decided what part or parts of this blog to read (“None.” is technically an acceptable answer, but you make me cry), let’s get into the blog itself.

CAST

Breaking from my usual format, I’m going to start off the “Cast” section by addressing a point from the “Overall” section. If “Survivor Blood vs. Water” could be described in once cliche, it would be “Jack of all trades, master of none.”. I don’t just mean that in the sense of “Every category is strong, but doesn’t stand out”, but within the categories themselves, things get a bit convoluted. Case in point, the cast. Usually in this section, I try and talk about the biggest, most breakout character to come out of the season, and work my way down from there. This is not to say that “Blood vs. Water” doesn’t have those breakout characters, but none really shines above the others. Thankfully, though, if I AM forced to quantify things, there are two big characters who stand out from this season, and both of them happen to be new faces to this series. We have Ciera Eastin and Vytas Baskauskas. Like I said before, I try and talk about people in descending order of breakout-ness (my word), but it’s really a pretty close tie between these two. Some might argue that, given how much she’s talked about today, Ciera is clearly the larger breakout of the two. However, I would counter that this is largely due to the existence of “Survivor Cambodia” at the time of this writing. SPOILER ALERT: Ciera lasts a long time on that season, while Vytas is the first one out. That could easily skew things in the minds of the viewing public. Let us not forget that Vytas was basically the heartbreaker of this season. He never quite reached Malcolm Freberg (“Survivor Philippines”) levels in this regard, but he was up there. Easy on the eyes, Vytas used his charm to snake his way through what of the game he could, even managing to pull a Chris Daugherty (“Survivor Vanuatu”) and survive a women’s alliance out for his blood. Granted, he got voted out shortly thereafter, but it was still an impressive number of votes survived. And this, as he himself admits, is largely due to his tragic backstory. Vytas, you see, is a former crack addict, even doing time for petty theft to feed his addiction. A sob story like this plays well on “Survivor” period, but it comes off in an even more pronounced way due to the twist of this season. I’ll be talking more about my thoughts on all this in the “Twist” section, naturally, but suffice to say that Vytas’ brother also competed on this season. If Vytas’ last name sounded familiar, it’s because his brother happens to be Aras Baskauskas, winner of “Survivor Exile Island”. While Aras is generally considered one of the more boring winners the show ever produced (which is not helped this season. Coincidentally, Aras will not be talked about in the “Cast” section on his own merits), he WAS considered a model of purity and goodness, peace-loving yoga instructor that he is. Vytas and Aras had similar personalities overall, but Vytas had a dark edge to him, while Aras was, again, purity and goodness. They played off each other, as pretty much no matter what, one of them would have something you liked. A proverbial “Betty and Veronica” choice, if you will. For my part, I did enjoy Vytas, and think he’s a good character. He had a good underdog story, and that aforementioned edge made him a more intriguing character than his brother. While his time in the game was overall too short, I did enjoy watching Vytas play, and dutifully voted for him to come back.

On to Ciera, here we have a character who took a little more time to blossom. Being on the bottom of early alliances gave her a bit of an underdog story, but she didn’t really come into her own until after the tribe swap. After that, she was allowed to be a part of the dominant alliance, and here she showed that she could hang with the best of them. She quickly became a major player in the alliance, helping to call a lot of the shots, and notably calling the bluff of the minority players this time around. For reasons I’ll get into shortly, Ciera often gets knocked as “Not that great a player”, but she had her moments. Don’t believe me? Go back and watch the scene where Katie Collins (who won’t be talked about beyond this paragraph) tries to bluff how she has an idol, and watch how Ciera completely turns the whole thing around on her. Masterful. And for a first time player, making it so deep against fairly stiff competition is nothing to sneeze at. But, to address her bad points, Ciera did make a gaffe in waiting an episode too long to flip on her alliance-mates, when she saw they would take her no further. An error, to be sure, but I don’t think it counteracts the good moves she made beforehand. And, after all, to ere is human. It may have been an error, but in my book, it makes her more compelling. The other counterargument is that her “signature move” of voting out her mother, Laura Morett (“Survivor Samoa”, was not as big a deal as the show made it out. To which I wholeheartedly agree. After all, “Survivor”, in all its glory, is also a very cheesy show. It wouldn’t be “Survivor” if it didn’t amp up the melodrama and blow things out of proportion. Still, I don’t think it takes away from the importance of the move as a whole. It was sacrificing a close ally to endear yourself to the power players. On most any other season, that would be hailed as a brilliant move! To have it not be for Ciera is a double standard for the season. As for myself, I think Ciera is a good addition to the show, since she’s such an unlikely mastermind. I’ll admit, I was prepared to dislike her for her fundamentalist beliefs, since I’m an atheist, but they didn’t really bleed into the show, so I can’t hold them against her. For what we got, the shock alone of seeing THIS character of all people become a breakout hit is pretty startling, and seeing her machinate and evolve as time went by was also a great joy.

And so, for our third and final good major hit, we come to our winner, Tyson Apostol (“Survivor Tocantins”). Coming off of a laughably ridiculous exit from “Survivor Heroes vs. Villains” Tyson was something of an underdog. Even Jeff Probst thought he didn’t stand much of a chance. But Tyson is not to be underestimated. On both his previous appearances, his ego was his undoing, and Tyson learned from that fact, pretty well keeping himself in check the entire time. For my personal benefit (since I’m not a huge fan of his humor), he toned down the snark a great deal, though it’s still there. This is a double-edged sword, though, as it makes him more likable but less memorable. His strategic play and whats left of his snark do make him memorable enough, but compared to his other seasons, he just seems like an all-business version of himself. Even his win isn’t that exciting. It was pretty well-broadcast from early on, and while his strategic play was good, it was also mainly standard stuff we see most seasons executed superbly. Like I said, Ciera and Vytas were the real movers and shakers of the season, but Tyson still makes a good winner overall, just not the most interesting part of the season.

Note, though, the adjective “good” in that previous topic sentence. Yes, sadly, there is one breakout hit who must be discussed now. Get out the “Misogynist-Beater” Sticks, we’re talking Brad Culpepper. The former pro-Football player came out with the proverbial guns blazing, being the driving force of strategy for the first six episodes, and coming out with incredibly sexist and homophobic attitudes within the first hour of showtime. Never forget that is was Brad Culpepper who counted Caleb Bankston, the gay man of his tribe, as “One of the girls”. Let us also not forget that large swaths of the case, and pretty much all of the audience hated the guy’s guys. He always deferred to guys if he was going to be subservient, and was pretty much a jackass the whole way through. Sometimes that can be fun to watch, but Brad lacks the charm for that, and is also hindered by his sexism. Some have praised his appearance for inciting discussion of gender politics on “Survivor”, and that’s certainly true, but most people, myself included, would have preferred he just never showed up and gave us this unpleasantness in the first place. While it was fun to watch his alliance fall, Brad’s schtick, such as it is, got old within the first episode, and having to put up with such attitudes front, center, and arguably praised on the show was no fun. That said, I will give Brad credit for one of the funnies subtle arcs in the show’s history. It’s established early on that the TRUE enemy of Brad Culpepper is not the elements, his fellow competitors, or even Jeff Probst. No, Brad’s true enemy is FIRST GRADE MATH! When talking of forming his alliance, Brad incorrectly says that five is greater than four. He makes some other math goofs besides that, but that one scene gets the point across. Cut to Brad’s elimination episode, and what gets him evicted? Counting the numbers 1-100. Sweet poetic justice. Still doesn’t justify his place on the show, but funny nonetheless.

Now, we move on to our second category, that being “Those who were big at the time, but have since fallen into relative obscurity”. I use the term “relative” in this case, because the more recent the season, the more people are talked about. Still, people live Vytas and Ciera still get mentioned a lot to this day, and while these next people are still talked about, it’s not NEARLY to the degree that the previous people are, and so we put them here. Paralleling our biggest characters, we start off with a pair of new-player strategists. First up, we have Hayden Moss, a former “Big Brother” winner and a favorite example of stunt casting. At this point, while “Big Brother” was a part of the “Big 3” of CBS reality television, and had crossed over with “The Amazing Race”, no one had really crossed over back to “Survivor”. So, the question was, how would he do? After all, it’s one thing to win “Big Brother”, but “Survivor” is generally considered the toughest of the “Big 3”, so would those skills transfer over? Surprisingly, yes. Hayden, while nothing particularly special, proved himself to be a halfway decent strategist, skillfully shifting between alliances at the swap, and ultimately organizing a counter-alliance against Tyson that, had the timing been better, might actually have succeeded in overthrowing him. Add onto that him helping to force the first rock draw since “Survivor Marquesas”, and you’ve definitely got a guy worth remembering. I think he’s forgotten mainly because his personality was just that of a generic, laid-back guy, and while he did try and make big moves, and they were well-thought-out, none of them were particularly successful. I think there are better characters to focus on, so I’m not TOO disappointed that Hayden isn’t talked about so much, but the guy deserves respect, and was a decent enough addition to the season.

Hayden would be nowhere without his successful partner in crime, though. Caleb Bankston, an Alabama farm boy, proved to be much more that the racist stereotype many thought he would be at the outset. Very laid-back, Caleb quickly endeared himself by having an obviously sweet nature, and earning the ire of Brad Culpepper (and thereby the love of the audience) for his sexual orientation. Satisfyingly, Caleb was one of the main driving forces behind the eviction of Brad, calling an audible shift at Tribal Council that succeeded on the revote. Arguably, this makes him more successful than Hayden, since while Hayden was generally more the lead role (Caleb taking on the role of lieutenant), Caleb actually has a victory to his name. So, why isn’t Caleb talked about nowadays, if he was a decent, likable strategist who helped get rid of a major asshole? Sure, he’s kind of generic, but not to the degree that Hayden is. Well, the trouble for Caleb is that a lot of talk and airtime centers around people the audience wants back on the show, and while the audience may indeed wish Caleb back on the show (certainly I do), Caleb can’t come back. Regrettably, Caleb was killed in a train accident about a year after the show had aired. It’s a tragic loss, both of a life and of a good character. May he rest in peace, and those who knew him well find solace in his legacy.

Moving on to our returnees here, the name of the game is “Underdog Story”. A bit odd to find returning players in this situation, but there you go. In fact, we got THREE such stories this season! First off, we have something of a duo in Laura Morett (“Survivor Samoa”) and Tina Wesson (“Survivor The Australian Outback”). I lump them together both because they worked together later on, and because their arcs both revolve around the same thing. I’ll be going into more detail in the “Twist” section, but suffice to say that the God-awful “Redemption Island” twist makes a return. Laura ended up here pre-merge, and fought her way back into the game. She managed to avoid being voted off IMMEDIATELY, but did fall again before too long, and fought her way to the final duel. Tina, meanwhile, had control wrested from her at the merge (when she’d been playing a solid game up to that point), and had to fight her way back against some of the most athletic competitors from this season. No small feat for either of them, particularly given that they’re considered “old” by the standards of “Survivor” (at the time of filming, Laura was 43 years old, and Tina 52). Tina was already well-liked, and Laura showed her softer side this time, particularly with her daughter Ciera, so both were likable enough as well. For my part, their story was enjoyable, and they made fun underdogs to root for, so why should they be forgotten? “Survivor” tending to underemphasize story arcs relating to women, particularly older women, is a factor, but I think the major one is just the fact that they were returnees. While the returnees once again ran the game this season, the real intrigue was with the new players, particularly having just come off of another season featuring returning players, and so Tina and Laura regretfully fall by the wayside.

As to our third, we have surprise challenge beast and self-proclaimed “nice person” Monica Culpepper (“Survivor One World”). Obviously the wife of Brad Culpepper, Monica had a big story going early on. Since Brad was the center of a large amount of controversy, it only seems fitting that she would be drawn in as well. As you’d expect, Monica was more than a little upset at hearing her husband talked about this way (bear in mind that the quote for the season is “Fuck you, Brad Culpepper!”), and so attempted to defend him at every turn. This controversy also led to her getting clues to the hidden immunity idol, due to a twist I’ll talk about in the “Twist” section, though little came of it, since she took to burning said clues in a convenient fire pit. However, she struggled through a rough tart, got into the enviable position of swing vote come the merge, and utterly DOMINATED the individual challenges. Hell, her efforts earned her second place overall. Hardly a bd showing, and while her occasional melodrama and her ties to Brad do drag her character down a bit, she’s still one of the better parts of the season, and it’s a shame she’s not as talked about now. She should be up there with the Colby’s (“Survivor The Australian Outback”) and the Ozzy’s (“Survivor Cook Islands”) of the show. I can only attribute her lack of popularity to a combination of the aforementioned Brad connection and “Survivor” not emphasizing her story as much.

Moving on to our rapid-fire section on people who maybe weren’t as big of a character on the show, but deserve mention for one reason or another, we have another returnee. Yes Candice Cody, formerly Candice Woodcock of “Survivor Cook Islands” comes in as a last-minute replacement for RC Saint-Armour from “Survivor Philippines”, and had a decent run on Redemption Island, since she was the first person sent there. For my part, I find her annoying, and place a lot of the blame for the ruination of “Survivor Heroes vs. Villains” on her, so I’m not sorry to see the back of her. Still, she did help incite a lot of the Brad bashing on the show (she uttered the aforementioned “Fuck you, Brad Culpepper!”), so there’s that. Also memorable in the quotes department was Kat Edorsson (“Survivor One World”), who would not bear mentioning were it not for the fact that upon being sent to Redemption Island she talked about how people who don’t make the merge are “Undateable”. This is just the kind of pathetic and shallow comment we expect from Kat, so it STILL wouldn’t be worth mentioning were it not for the fact that the term “dateable” has now become a part of “Survivor” fan parlance, meaning whether or not someone will make the merge, so she needs at least a passing mention.

And finally, we come to it. The sin that REALLY drags this season down! Yes, about as much as Brad Culpepper. Some IDIOT in casting thought it would be to get Colton Cumbie (“Survivor One World”) to come back for another season. You know, the guy who was a whiny, racist asshole and then either quit or got medevaced depending on your point of view? Yeah, another season of him is REALLY what we needed! True, his time was mercifully short, seeing him get verbally TRASHED by Probst was a nice touch, and he did give us Caleb, but that doesn’t excuse having to put up with him in the first place only for him to actually OUTRIGHT quit this time, making him effectively a wasted space. Sorry, sorry, I try to be nice to Colton, since Caleb obviously saw something in him and after losing Caleb, the guy’s been through enough, but there was really little to no point to having Colton back and he’s just unpleasant to watch! UGH!

Overall, though, the cast is very strong. The new players stand out just as much, if not better than, the returnees, strong gameplay abounds, and there are a lot of fun story arcs to follow, even if your favorite left early. A pretty strong cast for a pretty good season. It did have a few unpleasant people dragging it down, though, so I’ll knock off two points for that. One each for Brad and Colton. Seems fair.

Score: 8 out of 10.

CHALLENGES

The challenges this season are a mixed bag, leaning towards the side of being good. Part of what drags it down is due to the “Redemption Island” twist, since it means we’re only getting one full-scale challenge per episode. And then, we get a large number of repeat challenges from past season, which is more than a little annoying. When we DO get original challenges this season, though, they tend to be memorable and entertaining ones. Some of them even went on to become “Survivor” staples, like the barrel-rolling challenge. However, not every new idea is a hit. Bear in mind that THIS season brought us the popularization of skee-ball as a challenge element, which I maintain is a stupid challenge element.

That said, I have got to give this season credit in one major area: the balance of good challenges. Most of the time in this section I complain about the loss of scale for individual challenges, and how it drags this section down. This is not a complaint I can have about Blood vs. Water. While the individual challenges are a mixed bag, I remember as many if not more of them than the team challenges, and this season did a very good job making them tough and entertaining. The negatives I mentioned earlier do hurt this category a certain amount, but that’s a major feather in the cap of this category.

Score: 7 out of 10.

TWISTS

Hoo boy, this section is going to be a toughie. Blood vs. Water is nothing if not twist-happy, so we might be here a while. I suppose it’s best to start with the elephant in the room, that being the twist of “Blood vs. Water” itself. As I hinted at before, this season pitted returning players against their loved ones, adding a personal connection between the tribes never before seen on the show. It is, without question, the defining twist of the season, but is it any good? Well, regardless of the answer to that question, I can say that it was at least innovative. “Survivor” loves to boast about still having “firsts” many seasons in, but oftentimes these “firsts” are nothing more than marketing fabrication. Here, however, we have a legitimately new and interesting that can potentially have us watch a whole new game. That in and of itself is a plus, but the fact that the twist came off so well only adds fuel to the good fire here. As I wrote before this season began, this twist had the potential to go horribly wrong, to have a show now primarily about strategy spiral into personal arguments worthy of shows like “Jersey Shore” or “Real Housewives”. And, with all the Brad stuff we’d be getting into later, it seemed like the show might take that route. In the end, though, the presence of a personal dynamic enhanced, rather than hindered, strategy. People took revenge on tribe members they didn’t like through their loved ones, alliances were formed either to benefit couples or against the idea of couples. Ideas we’d never even thought of came to the forefront, giving us an innovative season like we hadn’t seen in a while! Sure, “Survivor Philippines” and “Survivor Caramoan” were both GOOD, there’s no doubts there, but they lacked a lot of innovation. Blood vs. Water brought that in spades. Ergo, good twist.

Talking about the other previously-mentioned twist, Redemption Island is back this season, working pretty much the same way it always has, and for those reasons, I still hate it. However, it’s worth noting that many say that this was actually a “good” incarnation of the twist, and it’s not hard to see why, given the one change that was made to Redemption Island this time around. We had three-person duels, which seem inherently less exciting than two-person duels, so the production came up with an incentive for first place. The outright winner of a duel won the right to assign someone still in the game a clue to the hidden immunity idol, a dynamic that got taken full advantage of, and used in revenge against the family members of people the winner happened to dislike. The logic was that having such an obvious idol clue made one a target, and therefore one got revenge on the person they hated. Why not give it to the hated one outright? Well, while making one a target, the idol clue does have the potential to give one great power, by finding a hidden immunity idol, and you don’t want your enemy to get that. Best risk vs. reward outcome here. The other major twist of Redemption Island was the opportunity to swap places with your loved one at any duel. they would take your place on your tribe, and you would fight for your life. This rarely came into play in that regard, since only one person (Rupert Boneham of “Survivor Pearl Islands”) was foolish enough to swap, but again, it did change the strategy of early votes, since now one would vote people off in the hopes of getting a strong competitor on the other side to swap in. Both excellent twists, and while I’ll talk about this more in the “Overall” section, I can’t deny that many of the more memorable moments on this season came as a result of this twist. Woe, then, that I must still point out that, while better than other incarnations, the Redemption Island twist is still a horrible idea, for all the reasons I’ve enumerated previously. It gets rid of challenges, it violates one of the few firm doctrines of “Survivor” (“Once the votes are read, the decision is final.”), and most damning, it moves what should be the climax of an episode right to the beginning, thereby lessing the impact of each episode overall. Granted, the good points I’ve mentioned are still there, and do make the twist more bearable, but it’s like being rewarded with a brownie after eating a shit sandwich. Yes, the brownie is delicious, but is it really worth eating an entire shit sandwich to get it?

Moving to a more chronological structure, our first twist actually revolves around when the game starts. Rather than begin on “Day 1”, we were given a “Day 0”, which saw each couple being marooned together, though with each couple separated from the others. A chance to talk strategy alone, and really get to know these couples as couples before they’re inevitably split up? Wow! What a really great idea! If only they gave it time to develop. Yep, while we get a couple of cursory interviews during “Day 0”, the twist was really pointless, basically just giving the show a fancy way of opening the new season. It’s not that the twist is bad, but it ultimately has no impact on the show as a whole, and is just kind of pointless. It’s a shame, really, because I feel that this twist had a lot of potential to be really fun and bring out new aspects of “Survivor”. Instead, it was a glorified opening. I don’t count it AGAINST this section, but neither does it count FOR it, and I have to shake my head at the waste of potential.

Following this, we get our first fully reused twist, courtesy of “Survivor Tocantins”. After being divided into a tribe of returning players and a tribe of new players, each tribe is asked to vote out one person to be sent to Redemption Island. While a reused twist, this is one we hadn’t seen in a while, and the personal connection really makes this one work, since it’s our first example of voting someone out to get back at a potential threat. Bear in mind that the returnees had COLTON CUMBIE on their tribe, and yet the elected to vote out Candice. The new players vote out Laura Boneham, leading to the one instance of a loved one swapping out, with Rupert stepping in for his wife, after some coercion by Probst (the man went on and on about how big a hero Rupert is seen as, so there was no way he wasn’t stepping in. Granted, I think he’d have stepped in regardless, but the point still stands). Also, Aras voting for Gervase Peterson (“Survivor Borneo”), and giving the reason as “Hating the Philadelphia Eagles”? Hilarious. Thumbs up unequivocally for this one.

Now we get into the player twists, and how tribe dynamics develop. We don’t get much of Galang (the returnees), in the first couple episodes, other than some cursory talk about how Laura Boneham is the odd person out, and Colton whines a lot about the game being “too slow”, but we’ll have plenty to talk about later. Tadhana, however, is another story, as the guys form something of a “Boys Club”, and take control of the tribe. This also gives us our first instance of voting someone out in revenge. Gervase’s niece, Marissa Peterson, was voted out due to Gervase making an ass of himself at the immunity challenge, leading Tadhana to want revenge. These are the sort of new voting dynamics that make this season so innovative and good, so once again, thumbs up.
Episode 3 brought us two minor shake-ups. After trying unsuccessfully to get a “Survivor One World” alliance together, Monica decided to abandon the already on-the-outs Colton in favor of a stronger alliance, including Aras, Tina, Tyson, Gervase, and ostensibly Kat. Worth noting here is the emergence of “Coconut Bandits” Tyson and Gervase, so named when the pair snuck off and ate most of gallants coconuts. A minor moment, but a fun part of the season worth mentioning.

This perceived lack of strategizing (since no one would talk to him) led to Colton opting to quit the game. While it was nice that his time was mercifully short, and even with a nice berating from Probst on the way out, this was still a poor exit for Colton that did not justify his place on the show. Then, of course, there was the MAJOR shake-up of episode 3, where Brad started to realize that, by voting out one half of a couple, it incentivized the other half to get rid of couples. Add onto that the fact that Brad figured he had a guaranteed merge spot along with Monica, and Brad very suddenly changed tactics to voting off the remaining half of couples that he could. Since John had been given a hidden immunity idol clue early on, Brad became paranoid about it being used against him, and since his other half was effectively out of the game, guess who got voted out? However, this paranoia would prove to be Brad’s undoing next episode. In a crowning moment for Caleb, he quickly realized that this made him a potential target to Brad (Laura Boneham being untouchable on Galang at the moment), and so, after hearing Brad give a horrible answer at Tribal Council, called an audible and eliminated him, along with Vytas and the remaining ladies. This, for me, is the highlight of the pre-merge game. Getting rid of an unlikeable villain in a very blatant and unusual way? That’s good “Survivor” right there.

Minor note worth mentioning here: the immunity challenge from that episode also featured a minor twist. As you’d expect with a twist such as this, we got some good confrontations between loved ones in a “Sumo at Sea” challenge. Chief amongst these was the rivalry between Aras and Vytas coming to a nice head. And the dynamic was best on display when, having fought to a relative stalemate, Aras offered Vytas the chance to back off, get up, and start over. Vytas, having more of a dark side, used this as a cheap shot against Aras, though Aras still came back to win and the pair had a talk about their brotherly dynamic throughout their life. It’s scenes like these that really make the “Blood vs. Water” twist work: they add to the dynamics of the game, but don’t distract from them, and don’t delve into melodrama.

Things get further twisted in Episode 5, when galling actually consents to LOSE a challenge, meaning the returnees are now confronted with actually having to vote someone off. In a twist, original target Laura Boneham is turned down by Aras in favor of Laura Morett, as the latter had been trying to play him very blatantly, whereas Laura Boneham was an unobtrusive worker bee. A good shakeup overall, particularly since it led to Laura Morett’s underdog story I love so much.

Speaking of shake-ups, next episode gives us our tribe swap. It’s done in a very “Blah” way, but it does make things very uneven on the tribes. The only athletic younger male on the new Galang was Vytas, while the only real drag on the new Tadhana was Ciera. Not that Tadhana was a slouch in the strategy department by any stretch, though. Tyson used this as his opportunity to seize control away from Aras, convincing Hayden, Caleb, and Ciera to join forces with him to oust Aras. A good, adequately foreshadowed move that changed the course of the game, and kept it all interesting.

But, of course, due to losing a lot, the real story of intrigue is at the new Galang. We have essential the birth and death of an alliance over the course of two episodes. The women pretty much all band together to take out Vytas, only to have Vytas play a laid-back game and pull out the sympathy card, due to his addict past. Combine that with some of the women not being able to keep their mouths shut, and you’ve got Vytas surviving not one but TWO votes, as first Kat and then Laura Boneham get evicted. An engaging and unpredictable storyline if ever there was one, and definitely a worthy addition to the season.

Coming to the merge, we get some intrigue over which side Monica will fit in on (along with the start of Monica’s challenge beasting), ultimately leading to the dominance of Tyson’s alliance, adding Laura Morett to the ranks, since she’d come back from Redemption Island, and had a connection with Ciera as well as a grudge against Tyson. By and large, this is the end of the twists, since Tyson pretty well runs the table for the season, and yet there’s still a fair amount of intrigue. After a couple of predictable vote-offs, we get Laura Morett’s second elimination, which not only constitutes a shift in the alliance, but also Ciera’s aforementioned voting out of her mom. And oh, the melodrama. Many people hate this twist for being overblown, but I think it really works. There’s definitely an emotional component to it, but it’s still strategy at it’s core, and the intriguing debate of whether someone should vote off a loved one or not to better themselves in the game is a nice addition. Yeah. it’s not as big of a deal as the show made it out to be, but that doesn’t mean it has no merit.

With the second eviction of Laura Morett, we get one of the more interesting things to ever come out of Redemption Island: collusion. At this point, Laura was on Redemption Island with Tina and Vytas. Now, Vytas is tough competition, but so is Laura, and since puzzle challenges favored her, she won first place. Having solve the puzzle, though, she decided to influence things further, by advocating for Tina to win. She did this by basically telling Tina the solution to the puzzle, allowing her to edge out Vytas for the win. If I can say one good thing came out of Redemption Island, it’s definitely this. Collusion to this degree hadn’t really been seen before, and it added an intriguing dynamic to the game besides. Granted, it would be Laura’s undoing, since Tina ultimately beat her in the last duel, but that’s neither here nor there. For what it is, it’s still fun.

Around this time, we get two minor twists: Monica giving up a reward to give it to everyone else, and Ciera calling Katie’s idol bluff. The former is standard, and really has no impact, save to make us like Monica a bit more, but the latter really helped keep these later episodes interesting, showing that intrigue that could happen, even in a situation with one solid dominant alliance. It also did a good job of showcasing Ciera’s smarts, so kudos there.

Our next actual threat comes from within, as Hayden and Caleb start to realize “Hey, why are we letting TYSON control our fates?” Banding together with Katie, the three try to get a “Loved ones” alliance going, attempting to draw in Ciera as a swing vote against Tyson, Gervase, and Monica. Ciera, however, believes her chances are better with the latter group, and helps in voting out Caleb. This is the main mark against Ciera’s strategic cred, since she passed up an opportunity that could very easily have lead to her victory. And yeah, I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t disappointing to see, but it did lead to the next fun moment of the season: the rock draw. Thankfully, Ciera did come to her senses, just one episode too late. Because of this, she forced a tie between Monica and Hayden, forcing herself, Tyson, and Katie to draw rocks (Gervase having individual immunity this time around). It all comes to naught, as Katie goes home, but while elimination by rock is always a dissatisfying exit, losing Katie was that that big of a loss game-wise, and it was a major moment to see a rock-draw after 23 seasons. Plus, it led to a really sweet moment where Tina offered to throw the duel for Katie in the next episode.

Ultimately Tina comes back and while she is eliminated, it’s not right away. In one last twist, the old alliance turns on Ciera, believing her to be too big of a jury threat, and she’s evicted. Pretty cool, but I wish the rest of the season wasn’t then a slog towards an obvious Tyson victory.

Innovation is always a scary thing to have in a show, since it can backfire horribly, but here, in addition to some really good player strategy, nearly every twist hit home. It added new dynamics that made the show feel fresh again, and breathed new life into the fanbase. It wasn’t perfect, of course. The presence of Redemption Island and the flatness of a few of the ideas drop this section a couple points, but overall, this was a good season for twists.

Score: 8 out of 10.

OVERALL

In terms of aesthetics, gong back to the Philippines could have been disastrous. While they did use a different AREA of the Philippines, you wouldn’t be able to tell that for certain unless you read up pre-season. Still, while I wouldn’t say the season stands out in terms of aesthetics, neither does it blend in, striking a balance between distinctiveness and anonymity. I won’t be winning any awards in this area, but I would say that it does its job adequately.

Of course, the real theme of the season is right there in the title. Blood vs. Water. How far will you go in the game of “Survivor” to win? The cost of a loved one? The answer, obviously, is yes, one will do that, but more often than not, the dynamics and scenes resulting from this came off very well, and not in a melodramatic fashion. As I said earlier, the twist helped give this season a fresh feeling and added some stuff we legitimately hadn’t seen before, and that really elevates this season in my eyes. It was a big risk. After all, it could have descended into highly personal bickering and revenge plots, which can be hard to watch in large quantities. Thankfully, we avoided this, showing that not only could such twists and themes be handled with class but that it could even enhance the game we have come to know and love.

With all that said, though, this category turns out to be the worst for me. True, this season has good elements, and you’ll never hear me say this was a BAD season by any stretch, but I don’t think it deserves as much love as others give it. Partly that’s because I’m not a fan of the Redemption Island twist, and have a hard time forgiving this season for it, but that alone cannot account for what I consider to be just a slightly-above-average season. Looking at each element individually, they work. When they come together, though, I think they tend to blend in. I said that this season could be described as a “Jack of all trades, master of none.” While it does all the elements well, it doesn’t really have that one element that stands out above the rest, and this is something I think might be necessary for a good season. In essence, this season might have done too well at everything. By making it all good, there was no contrast to shine above the rest, and that, in a sense, drags it down.

Again, please don’t misunderstand me. This season is great in almost every element. But when I think about it, there aren’t moments from this season that stand out within the context of the whole of “Survivor” history here, and what few moments there are are overshadowed by similar moments in other seasons. Still, this season always comes fairly high in my rankings, and with regards to my “Jack of all trades…” comment, I think the season can actually be BEST summed up by the full quote of that saying: “Jack of all trades, master of none, but better than master of one.”

Score: 30 out of 40.

ABSTRACT

If you find yourself getting into a “Survivor” rut, wherein you feel that you’re getting similar plot points each season, then “Survivor Blood vs. Water” is the season to watch. It shakes up a lot of “Survivor” conventions in a good way, and gives you brand new dynamics to get invested in. It comes with the warning that it does have returning players, which can makes things confusing, so this might not be a good early season to watch. If, however, you’re a seasoned veteran looking for something different in a good way, then this season gets a very high recommendation from me.

Idol Speculation: “Survivor Blood vs. Water” Finale: Ordaining an Apostol

Yes, I am well aware that my title gives away the winner of this season.  No, I don’t care.  With the exception of my cast-assessment blog, I make it very clear that my blog contains spoilers, and anyone going into it should know to expect that.  Besides, this episode didn’t bother indicating that any outcome other than the obvious would come up, so why should I try?

As per the Tradition of the Finale, we get a longer “Previously On…” segment than usual, to catch up anyone who just tuned in for the finale.  It’s the usual long, overdramatic Probst narration, and while cheesy and melodramatic, it is so in a good way.  For all that I feel Probst has been off form this season, the narration was still in its rightful place.  My one complaint is how he makes out that each of the Final Four are where they are now because of their loved ones.  Look, Probst, I get that you’re trying to play up the season’s twist, and I get that the loved ones must have SOMETHING of an impact, but be honest, people only come on “Survivor” for the money, that’s what’s motivating them in this case.

Starting the episode for real, we get nothing out of the ordinary.  Ciera is naturally upset that she’s probably on the outs, but puts up a brave face.  Partly, she’s at least hopeful that whoever shows up from Redemption Island will be able to persuade Monica where she could not, and accordingly vote Tyson and Gervase out, hopefully giving her (Ciera) a shot at the win.  Leaves a lot up to luck, but Ciera’s not in much of a position to do anything else, so a good plan overall.

Monica, meanwhile, is making happy with Tyson and Gervase.  Tyson, in a show of loyalty, actually lets Monica hold his immunity idol, and I just now realized how sexual this description of the situation could sound.  Maybe Tyson really is having an impact on me.  Let me assure you right now that everything I’ve written in this paragraph is meant to be taken literally.  Monica is relieved in several sentences, but weakly admits that she might move against Tyson because of this, as he’s obviously been hiding things from her.

Our Redemption Island duelists, meanwhile, commiserate, as per usual.  All except Laura, who’s simply happy to hear that Ciera won immunity.  Uh, Laura, I get that she’s your daughter and all, but given that Hayden left almost as a direct result of her winning immunity, you might want to tone down the joy a little bit.  Hayden then sets up the framing of Tyson, Gervase, and Monica as the “Villains” of the season, which is not unreasonable, but also kind of mean in a sense.  Yes, they’ve been playing strategically, and have had their annoying and malicious moments, but none of them are really villains in the classical “Survivor” sense of the term.  Still, as this season goes, they’re definitely on the “Villain” end of the spectrum.

Possibly, we’ll get more Hayden philosophy after our commercial break.  By the way, HI, LACK OF AN INTRO!  I’ve avoided commenting on it all season, as I did that a lot for “Survivor South Pacific” and “Survivor One World”, and also because “Survivor Philippines” and “Survivor Caramoan” redressed the balance.  But I’m putting my foot down here because this is the FINALE!  You ALWAYS put the full intro in the finale.  It’s a reminder of just how far the game has come, and primes us for the Reunion Show, in a way.  To not have it in, when you have so much time and haven’t had it in all season, is just an insult.  I’ve seen the whole intro on Youtube, as well, and it’s a pretty good one.  It deserves to be seen.

Oh, well.  Hayden says that he thinks he’ll be able to beat “two Grandmas”, to which I must ask, Hayden, have you ever SEEN “Survivor”.  Final challenges, whether Redemption or otherwise, are nearly always endurance-based, which is usually an area where women excel more than men.  Plus, you’re up against pretty good physical competitors.  Laura is the odds-on favorite, in my book, but you can’t count out Tina.  People tend to forget, she had a great showing at the first individual immunity challenge on “Survivor The Australian Outback”, a “Stand on a small wood pole” challenge, and probably would have won had not Keith needed immunity for the good of Ogakor.  She might be a force to be reckoned with.

Laura and Tina give us equally blaze speeches, and we head off to Redemption Island, to FINALLY see it off, hopefully for good this time.  Sure enough, it’s an endurance challenge, a rehash of the ORIGINAL final challenge of Redemption Island, that being balancing a vase of the end of a plank with your foot.  Nothing about my above predictions changes.

Surprisingly, Laura seems to struggle first.  My best guess is just that she has final challenge jitters, but I really don’t know why her performance is suddenly sub-par.  Still, she has a nice recovery, and Hayden is the first one out, unsurprisingly.  Laura pathetically pleads with Tina to drop out, but Tina, ever the wise competitor, refuses, on the grounds that it would be stupid for Tina, particularly when Laura is showing weakness in the challenge.

Not long after, Laura falls, putting Tina back in the game.  Hayden leaves with little fanfare, though I will miss him for how hard he tried, whatever situation he was in.  Laura gets a tearful speech about wanting to show strength to her children by winning, and that by losing, she has therefore failed.  This is really faulty logic, which Ciera thankfully points out, allowing Laura to leave with grace.  For winning, Tina gets to give away the idol clue, which she wisely gives to herself, given that she probably near the bottom, and Redemption Island returnees tend to be the early targets. give her credit, though, she makes a fun show of stuffing the clue in her busom.  Highlight of the episode, right there.

With Tina back, there’s a few congratulations, but we waste no time in getting to the heart of the matter, that being Tina’s attempting to better her position.  Say what you will about Tina, the woman does not give up attempting to improve her situation, however hopeless.  Sharing the clue with Ciera, for some reason, she begins a fruitless search for the idol.  After getting the requisite “Tina is a tough mom!” speech from Ciera, the pair try a new tack: flip Monica.  Tina plays tings more aggressively than Ciera has in the past, lambasting Monica fobeing unable to win over the jury unless she makes a big flip.  This is correct, but also neglects the issue that if Tina gets anywhere near the jury, Tina will win.  Ciera, somehow feeling that her 37 days of experience, many of which she was in danger of going home during, outweights Tina’s 82 days and one victory on “Survivor”, sees fit to correct Tina’s gameplay towards Monica as being too harsh.  Now admittedly I’d normally be inclined to agree with Ciera’s style of persuasion when it comes to Monica, but Ciera, given that your tactic didn’t work last week, I think perhaps you ought to just accept a new strategy.

CHALLENGE TIME!  And in one of the few instances of excitement in this finale, we actually have an original challenge.  It does draw elements from the damn “House of Cards” Challenge I so despise, but by my own definition, it is original.  Tribe members must stack 10 blocks horizontally on a table attached to a rope they pull.  The catch is that 9 of the blocks are behind them, and they must adjust their pull strength as they move back to prevent the blocks tipping over.  The first person with all 10 blocks stacked wins immunity.  This is a clever challenge, utilizing different components than one usually needs on “Survivor”, and makes for an easy way to score, as well as a lot of back and forth.  I suppose if I were to nitpick, I’d say that this challenge is neither very grand, nor very culturally distinctive, but as it’s original and difficult, I’ll let it slide.

A lot of exciting back and forth yields Tyson as the victor.  About time.  He’s billed as a challenge threat, but he hasn’t really performed as such thus far.  I’ve suspected he’s doing so on purpose to make himself less threatening, but there was that little bit of doubt in my mind.

Ciera and Tina are expectedly dejected at losing, as Tyson, Gervase, and Monica are on the beach debating who should go between Ciera and Tina.  Tyson, wisely wanting to curry favor, opts to let Gervase and Monica hash out what turns out to be a more contemptuous debate than one would expect at this stage.  Gervase thinks Ciera should go, on the grounds that she’s made several big moves, and could therefore beat them in final tribal, whereas Monica is adamant that Tina should leave, due to likeability alone.  I hate to go against Gervase, as unlike a lot of viewers, I’ve enjoyed watching him this season, but I’m afraid Monica is completely in the right.  Tina is likeable, and has never had to vote anyone out.  This makes her jury dynamite, and she needs to go.  Gervase, in what’s an incredibly stupid move, insists on getting his way, going so far as to basically threaten Monica, and browbeat her into following his plan, thus alienating Monica from the alliance in the process.

And this scene, I think, demonstrates Gervase’s main problem this season: While he has been studying “Survivor”, he doesn’t seem to understand the jury management phase of the game.  Whether you love, like, or dislike “Survivor Borneo”, you cannot deny that the social dynamics of the game were quite different.  Unlike future seasons, the contestants on “Borneo” had no primer, no example to follow.  This meant that it was more acceptable for big personalities to shine through, even be a little abrasive at times.  It also meant that the jury voted largely based on merit, one of the few times this has ever happened on “Survivor”, though some would argue.  Gervase, you will note, has not been shy about showing his bombastic personality, and even allowing it alienate people by just how blunt he can be.  This is because Gervase hasn’t figured out that you can’t do that anymore.  The jury now votes based mainly on likeability and how badly betrayed they were by each person, and one has to make nice to them, or else they can’t win.  For some reason, Gervase hasn’t grasped this fact, and it leads to his downfall with the jury.

Back to Monica, though, we see that she’s rather fed up with Gervase, and talks with Ciera about the possibility of flipping.  She informs them of Tyson’s idol, but thinks Tyson won’t play it tonight, as he thinks everyone is safe.  In fact, Tyson talks about keeping it as a souvenir for Rachel.  For the record, I HATE it when people talk about not playing the idol at the last Tribal Council it can be used at.  I understand the desire for a souvenir, but it’s stupid gameplay.  You have the ability to keep either yourself or an ally safe, thus bettering your own chances in some way, take it!  It’s a risk that gains you nothing, even if it pays off!

Fortunately, Tyson does not make an idiotic move, as after a fairly bland Tribal Council, at which Monica once again whines that she’s not getting the respect she deserves as a swing vote, he gives the idol to Gervase.  This is a good move, as Tyson has stated that he wants to go to the end with Monica and Gervase, but there’s danger of Monica flipping.  By protecting Gervase, he guarantees that tonight’s boot (Ciera, I guess Gervase got his way) will go down as planned.  His move was ultimately unnecessary, as Monica voted for Ciera as well, but a good safety net anyway.

As to Ciera’s exit, I’m surprisingly sorry to see her go.  Granted, of the people getting votes, I’d rather it have been her, and I think her early game was pretty weak, but she learned, made good moves, and just became something of a fun strategist to watch.  Politics aside, I look forward to her eventual return on another season.

This makes the Final Four all returnees.  Well done, loved ones.  Even the pathetic, underdog Fan Tribes on “Fans vs. Favorites” seasons always managed to get at least one person in the Final Four.

Morning comes, and Tina is naturally tense, as she correctly assumes that she has to win the Final Immunity Challenge to have any hope of making it to the finals.  Given that the final immunity challenge is endurance, more often than not, which would play to Tina’s strengths.

First, though, Tina has to get through the “Fallen Comrades” Tribute.  I always look forward to this, as it’s a nice send-off for everyone who played the game.  Regardless of how good they were at the game, or how far they made it, they still went out to compete, and deserve to be honored for it.  This season, it’s particularly appropriate and touching, as with family members out there, there’s a much more personal connection to people you weren’t even on a tribe with.  Truly, a touching, lovable ceremony.

That’s what I’d like to say, but the producers, in their wisdom, have decided to do away with the “Fallen Comrades” Tribute this season.  Smart, guys, real smart.

Please tell me you knew that was sarcasm.

To add insult to injury, our final challenge is NOT endurance, but a generic obstacle course.  Joy.  I’m not in the camp that EVERYTHING on “Survivor” is sacred, but I feel that things like the final immunity challenge being endurance-based are, and am naturally annoyed when they change them.  Still, at least there’s no immunity advantage this time around, the water slide element kind of works for reasons I can’t explain, and a few of the obstacles are unique this season, so it’s not a TERRIBLE obstacle course.  Plus, solving a puzzle to solve another puzzle for the combination lock is always fun.

Tina, being the oldest of the group, falls behind quickly.  Gervase and Monica seem to be the frontrunners, Monica with a slight edge after checking Gervase on the stairs, but it’s Tyson who pulls out the victory.  I would be happy for him, but in winning he pulls a dick move.  A vile move.  A move so evil, it earns him his “Villain” status: HE SNUBS A TINA CONGRATULATORY HUG!  That woman looks like she gives the best hugs, and given that you’ve probably crushed her spirit by winning, it’s UNBELIEVABLY gracious of her.  How DARE YOU, good sir?

It seems that not even losing can crush Tina’s spirit, though, as she works on Monica to try and force a tie, as revenge for Tyson’s giving the idol to Gervase (it was framed by Tina as a sign of mistrust).  This is where the episode falls apart for me.  While I appreciate Tina’s effort, I just don’t buy that Monica will flip, and Tyson and Gervase’s cavalier attitudes are just painful to watch.  Tribal is little better, and Tina goes home with little fanfare.  I must admit, though, I do miss her, to a degree.  For all that I think she showed more of her dark side on this season than any other, she does seem a genuinely nice person, and as I’ve said, I love her perseverance, so in that regard, I’m sorry for her exit.

When will I ever get an exciting Day 39?  There have been ones in the past, but all the ones I’ve blogged have been non-entities.  They eat their breakfast, comment on their chances at Final Tribal, and then head off.

At Final Tribal, Gervase starts off affairs with an average Final Jury speech.  He points out the steep learning curve he had having been out the game for 13 years, and also points out that he made many big moves in the game, even beyond Tyson, citing voting of Aras as a prime example.  A decent argument, but reminding Aras that you’re why he’s out of the game might not be the best move, dude.  Monica does worse, at least in my book, by saying that her goal was to get out of Brad’s shadow.  She claims she did so… by never making a move in the game.  Not seeing the logic here, Monica.  Finally, Tyson goes with an emotional appeal about how Rachel’s exit was his driving force in the game.  Maybe it’s how strategic he’s been this season, but I didn’t entirely buy it.  Seemed a bit of crocodile tears to me.

Vytas is up first for the jury questions, which surprises me, as he seemed the likely candidate for “Bitter Juror” this season, and “Survivor” usually hates to play its cards early like that.  But no, Vytas is quite composed, telling Tyson he won’t vote for him, on the grounds that he (Vytas) swore that if Tyson voted him off when he did, he (Vytas) would not vote for him.  He then warns Monica and Gervase that he’ll be listening closely to the pair of them, and deciding who to go for from there.

Evidently Tina got to help pick the order, as Katie is up next, no doubt in an attempt to force the pairing of them that Tina so desires.  Katie asks Tyson why she should vote for him, when he was kind of mean to her upon her exit.  Tyson responds partly jokingly, but fields the question ok.  Caleb is next up, asks Gervase what moves he made in the game, to which Gervase gives a vague answer, and asks Monica to explain a bit more about how she opened up as a person.  This leads to a Monica crying scene.  Don’t worry, we’ll have plenty more in a bit.  Ciera is afterward, and once again wants Gervase and Monica to explain themselves.  Frankly, this was generic and boring, and so I will not dwell on it.  Hayden wants similar answers, which leads to another Monica crying scene.  After that, we transition to ANOTHER Monica crying scene with Laura, who for once seems satisfied.  If it isn’t obvious by now, I don’t consider these good persuasion.  Crying maybe once at a strategic point, like Tyson did, can earn you jury votes, but doing it too often just makes you look weak in the eyes of the jury.

Our final two jurors are also our former winners.  Tina is up first, with the fairly unique question of describing yourself in one word.  Monica’s answer is boring, unmemorable, and has no impact on her standing, Gervase’s answer of “Honorable” probably lost him any votes, given that his actions contradict him, what with the “Voting out Aras’ angle, and Tyson’s answer of “Fun-Loving” was honest and inoffensive, probably the best way to handle things, possibly earning him a few jury votes.  Aras also has a zinger of a question, asking each in turn to say who of the other two they think should win and why.  Gervase and Monica both say Tyson, due to his great gameplay, while Tyson responds with Monica, as she was always the flip vote for him.

Well, with those jury performances, you might guess that Tyson would win.  You would be correct.  I certainly can’t begrudge him the win, guy played a good game.  He’s just not one of my favorites.  Good for him.

In fact, you could say that’s my opinion of the season overall: Good, but not one of my favorites.  I know a lot of people are praising this season for adding new strategies we’d never seen before, having a nice, hard-working (strategy-wise) intelligent cast, and these are all true.  However, I must argue the first point, as while we did get new strategy, I doubt it will impact much on the game as a whole, because it is so specific to this twist of “Survivor”.  Where else will deciding how the other tribe will take your vote off have such an impact?  Furthermore, a lot of the good, I think, comes from just avoiding how awful this season could have been.  It avoided, by and large, the twist turning into “How many family relationships can we tear apart?”, it got rid of a lot of the annoying people no one wanted back early on (read “Colton” for “annoying people no one wanted back”), and brought something new to the game, as well as several unpredictable episodes.  For me, though, these are just average things, and even though I hated the twist least here, I’m sorry, the addition of Redemption Island really drags the season down for me.  Yeah, it was good, but it only seems REALLY good for having avoided it’s pitfalls early on, which is not something to be praised in my book.  I wouldn’t MIND seeing the twist again, but I’d like a nice long gap beforehand.  5-10 years ought to do it.  Call me a traditionalist, but I prefer a more classic “Survivor” format.

But I suppose you people want me to comment on the Reunion show.  Well, it was a vast improvement from last year, I grant you that, but on the other hand, that’s not saying much.  I’m happy that everyone’s up on stage this year, I like that they’re taking fan questions (even if said questions are pretty generic), and I enjoyed that Probst did a good job of talking to pretty much everybody who played, or at least getting them in the shot.  With the exception of Marissa, I think everybody got to speak their piece, so that’s a plus.  Also, the tribute to Tina’s son and Katie’s brother was, I though, well-timed and well-done.  Since I haven’t officially expressed it, Tina and Katie, if you’re reading this blog, I’m very sorry for your loss, and wish you the best of luck in the grieving process, and in all your endeavors in the future.  Also, I’m very flattered that actual contestants are reading my blog.

What I must complain about, however, are the Cochran segment and the manner of revealing the upcoming season.  While this was nowhere near as bad as the “Survivor Caramoan” finale in terms of contestant cameos, I’m sorry, it just felt inappropriate and too soon.  The Reunion is supposed to be about CURRENT contestants, not those who just got off an earlier season.  While I admit the segment wasn’t TOO long, and was kind of funny, I’d already seen it on the internet, and took away time from the other contestants, which is NOT ok.  As to the reveal, I’ve expressed my annoyance with it before, especially given how obvious the twist for the new season was after the first clue.  The twist, by the way, is “Brains vs. Brawn vs. Beauty”, and I’m actually pretty excited for it.  I’ve advocated a “Brains vs. Brawn” season for a long time, and am quite pleased to see it being realized in some sense.  My one complaint is that I conceived it as another form of “All-Stars” season, and I don’t want that.  We’ve had a lot of returnees lately, I’m ready for an entirely new batch.

Let’s wrap up the old batch beforehand, though, with my usual assessment of how accurate my pre-game assessment was:

Gervase: Well, he didn’t win it all, and he wasn’t as charming as I thought, but he actually had decent gameplay behind his brazen personality, and he made it almost as far as I thought, so I’ll chalk this one up as a victory.

Marissa: Pretty wrong.  She wasn’t considered as much of an asset as I though, and left earlier, but at least she was about as tough as I expected.

Tina: I can’t really say I was wrong, but given that I kind of hedged my bets on Tina, I can’t say I was right either.  She turned out to still be pretty tough and smart gameplay-wise, but just didn’t have the numbers on her side to win.

Katie: Wrong.  While she did step up her game somewhat later, she never quite got the smarts I was hoping for, and was a target too often for me to say I was right about her.  She did make it fairly far, though.

Rupert: Dead right, for once.  Even sacrificed himself for his wife, he loved her so much.

Laura B.: Pretty wrong, again.  She was tough, but was on the outs socially from the get-go, and never had much of a strategy of her own.

Aras: Wrong.  I guess I never realized how much of a strategist he was, even beyond conflict management.  If nothing else, this season I respect him more as a player, stupid mountaintop-meditating-when-you-should-be-strategizing and all.

Vytas: Oh, so very wrong!  Guy was smarter and calmer than I expected, and I’m glad for it.

Candice: So wrong.  Man, I’m off this season.  I didn’t realize how much pre-game alliances, and being a latecomer to the group would affect perceptions of Candice.  She was out early.

John: Just as I say I’m always wrong, I get one right.  I slightly overestimated his time in the game, but got his play style and reason for leaving just about right.

Tyson: Wrong, obviously, since I didn’t predict his strategic dominance or ultimate victory.  I stand firm with my stance on his jokes, though.

Rachel: Right.  Enough said.

Laura M.: A mixed bag, here.  She lasted as long as I thought, but not due to her strategy, but due to Redemption Island.  Suppose that counts as a “Wrong”, but given how many of them I have already, I’m not inclined to add unnecessary ones.

Ciera: Wrong.  One of the LEAST emotional people out there, she actually made it pretty far.  What a pleasant surprise.

Monica: Wrong.  Clearly she learned her lesson, and although whiny, her game improved for it.

Brad: Completely right.  Nailed personality and time in the game.  I think “Ace” from “Survivor Gabon” is an apt comparison.

Colton: Right in most cases, but I’m still surprised he wasn’t first out.

Caleb: I got his personality down, but Colton wasn’t as huge a detriment to him as I thought.

Kat: Totally wrong.  Kat dug her own grave, and didn’t have a chance to pull a “Rob and Amber” (“Survivor All-Stars”).

Hayden: Closer to right, but the guy was tougher than I thought, and didn’t need a solid ally in Kat to play a good game.  I wouldn’t mind seeing him back, either.

Well, I suppose that’s it.  I know it’s customary for me to do a “Top 5 and Botton 5” on the final episode, but it’s late during Finals Week, and I don’t really have a good idea for a list.  I could do “Hidden Immunity Idols”, but I’m sure that’ll come up at a later date.  Sorry for the relative lack of content on this finale, but there just wasn’t a whole lot to say.  I’ll be on hiatus for a bit, as this break between seasons seems too short to merit bonus content, but check back in a month when I post my cast assessment for “Survivor Cagayan”.

-Matt

Title Credit to Jean Storrs.

Idol Speculation: “Survivor Blood vs. Water” Episode 13: Days of Our Islands

Frankly, this episode should have been titled “You’re a Good Man, Charlie Brown”.  No word describes this episode better than “blah”.  Let us waste no time in moving beyond it, and getting to the hopefully more exciting, and not gut-wrenchingly painful finale.

Seeing as how we haven’t been holding to tradition enough this season, let’s start off by looking in at Redemption Island, where Katie is consoled by Laura and Tina.  Katie discusses drawing rocks, and Laura pointlessly chastises Katie for drawing first.  Mother of the year, here, people.  Well, we do get a slightly more interesting debate when Tina suggests to Katie that she (Tina) might purposefully lose the challenge to keep Katie in the game.  While I understand Tina’s viewpoint, and given how sweet of a person she seems, I’m sure the offer is genuine, but I must ask, Tina HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MIND???  I understand that you love your daughter and all, but this is a GAME.  An INDIVIDUAL GAME nonetheless, and your daughter is a threat to you.  She’s an easy victory, don’t go along helping her if you can avoid it.  And for that matter, if you argue that she and her daughter are playing the game in tandem, and trying to make sure one of them wins, if anything, your daughter should be volunteering to lose for you!  You’ve proven yourself to be smarter, both strategically and in terms of puzzles, and you have experience playing the game before, which is a HUGE advantage.  But you know what’s even stupider than Tina’s offer to lose the challenge?  Katie’s not accepting it!  Katie, dear, you’re nice, but you need all the help you can get, it’s largely by luck you landed here.  When someone offers you a free pass, you take it, no questions asked!

Oy, maybe some more interesting things will be happening at Kasama.  Ciera is going around hugging everyone, while Monica is thanking Tyson and Gervase for not voting her off in the re-vote.  Way to make your allies trust you, Monica.  Admit that you didn’t trust them to stay loyal, that’ll keep them on your side.  Tyson and Gervase hide their strategic sides, though, and tell Monica that it’s because they like her, rather than the actual reason (strategy).  Tyson then gives his trademark snark about Monica’s general annoyingness, and admits to her that he has the idol to prevent her being paranoid about Hayden and Ciera.  Given how panicky Monica has shown herself to be, I must admit this is a good move on Tyson’s part.  Monica gives us a throwaway line about how after that reveal, she doesn’t trust Tyson as much, which I’m SURE means that the seeds of doubt have been sewn, and that Monica will totally throw off the yoke of her oppressor this time around.  Well, at least she gives us a funny bit about dragging Ciera over a line in the sand.  Yes, rub salt in the wound of the guy you were just trying to vote out, while simultaneously trying to bring back into the fold a person who just betrayed you, that’s the smartest strategy ever.

Morning comes, and we DON’T head to Redemption Island.  No complaints here.  Instead, we get a talk between Ciera and Hayden, which, though bland, is at least better than Redemption Island.  Ciera admits that she’s happy that she betrayed Tyson, Gervase, and Monica.  Really, Ciera?  You’re HAPPY that you went from being in the majority alliance, with a chance at hitting the final Tribal Council if you played your cards right, to being in the minority alliance with pretty much no shot at making it to the end?  Well, if that suits you.

The pair come up with the plan of “Win immunity and find the hidden idol”.  Oh, so original, but admit that they need a fallback.  Their fallback is specifically Monica, who, since her emotions and paranoia are at the forefront at this point, they’ll say that Tyson and Gervase have been mocking her behind her back (which they have, but not quite to the degree that they say), and try and get her to flip.  Not a bad fallback plan.  My only question is WHY DIDN’T YOU DO THIS SOONER?

Oh well, we head to Redemption Island, where we see that we’re rehashing the “Prison Break” challenge originally seen on “Survivor Thailand”.  Actually, as challenges go, it’s not a bad one to rehash.  It works pretty well on a small scale, it’s been done fairly often but not too often, it’s pretty difficult, and it’s fun to watch.  Fun to LISTEN TO, not so much.  I’m normally a fan of Probst narration, but this one turned the schmaltz dial so far, it broke the machine.  You get Tina crying again about having to face her daughter, which has gotten old exceedingly fast, and on top of that, during the challenge, Probst’s narration goes so over the top, that you’d swear that this whole thing suddenly turned into a soap opera.  In fact…

ANNOUNCER: Next week, it’s the episode fans will be talking about for the rest of the show.

TINA: I might lose for you.

ANNOUNCER: It’s mother…

TINA: I’m just not sure I want to beat my little girl!

ANNOUNCER: Against daughter!

KATIE: Go on Mom.

ANNOUNCER: It’s literal Blood vs. Water here.  Will either of them make the ultimate sacrifice?  Go through with their hardest challenge?

TINA: I’m just so proud…

ANNOUNCER: You won’t want to miss this heartbreaking episode of “Days of Our Islands”.

It’s amazing how well it fits.

I suppose the one GOOD thing about the challenge is that we get Tina turning Laura’s own strategy against her, shouting advice to Katie in the hope that they could both make it through this.  At least this is semi-decent strategy.  Keep your allies in the game, I can work with that.  It comes to nothing though, as, here’s a shock, Laura WINS!  Gee, haven’t seen THAT before, now have we, boys and girls?  This leads to a mother-daughter duel, that would have been a nice moment, were it not for the over-the-top Probst narration hammering in the point of what I hate about this season.  Now, the discussion that Tina had with Katie beforehand, I don’t mind, as it was framed with the debate of “How do you mix emotion with strategy?”, but Probst takes it and turns it into a “If you don’t do X, you don’t really love someone”, which is just where I DIDN’T want the season to go.  Man, Probst, you’ve been off this season.  Is there something wrong.

Katie actually seems to be making a good effort, but then drops her second key by accident.  This gives Tina enough of an opening to win the challenge, despite constantly asking her daughter if she (Katie) would like her (Tina) to forfeit.  Say “yes” Katie.  Show some brains for once!  But no, Tina comes in second, and while it was painful to watch Katie pass up opportunity after opportunity, I can’t say I’m sorry.  She didn’t really impact the game, got lucky in a lot of cases, and was just an overall bland, boring character.  You want to know hand bland and boring she was? She doesn’t even get an interview AT HER OWN EXIT!  Seriously, Probst talks to Tina and Laura instead.  I admit Katie doesn’t give great interviews, but that’s just insulting, Probst!  On top of that, it gives us more over the top emotion, complete with overdramatic music, which I’m just sick to death of.

Well, enough with the semi-emotional moment, let’s make it comedic by having Laura push around Probst and hand-deliver the clue to her daughter.  Not that it helps, as she and Hayden idol hunt in vain (incidentally, Hayden’s gotta be pretty pissed off about that whole “The idol is on the ground.” lie), while Gervase and Tyson take the time to bond with Monica, ensuring her loyalty.  I know that’s a great summarization, but let’s face it, not a lot of import happens in this segment.

Yes, our terrible rehash today comes NOT from Redemption Island, but from the immunity/reward challenge.  Specifically, we get the “Survivor Vanuatu” style “Push something through a water-based ropes course, and then solve a puzzle” challenge.  Generic.  Cliched.  An insult to original challenge design?  All of the above words describe this challenge.  At least the puzzle is kind of original in its execution and solution.  I admit, I had a hard time coming up with the typical Probst phrase (in part because I didn’t have access to all the letters), until people got up to “You’re going to have…”.  Then I got it.  For the record, the solution was, “You’re going to have to dig deep.”, which is a Probstism, but not a common one.  Good job, puzzle department.

In one of the few actual surprises this episode, CIERA of all people wins, after a close puzzle race, and Tyson and Gervase don’t bat an eyelash, because that leaves Hayden vulnerable anyway.  Now Ciera has immunity, and also the reward of any meal she orders right there on the beach.  Say, does anyone besides me remember the good old days when rewards could take you AWAY from camp, and how exciting that was?  Just another of the lovely benefits of Redemption Island: Killing off-camp individual rewards stone dead!  But Ciera gets to invite someone on the meal, and predictably picks Hayden.  Not a terrible choice, but if you’re going to work Monica anyway, why not invite her?  It would make her happy, give you more time to talk, and keep her away from Tyson and Gervase, who could sweet-talk her into loyalty.

As we see that Ciera and Hayden are idiots by ordering a cheeseburger and a pizza respectively, when steak was on the menu, we also see that, shock of all shocks, Tyson and Gervase sweet-talk Monica.  Even so, she stills seems to be harboring doubts after Ciera really lays into, though admittedly, Ciera does expertly counter Monica’s point of “Why would they stay loyal at the revote?” with the answer of “They’d be down in numbers”.  A for effort, but I still don’t buy it.  Can’t say exactly why, except that maybe the editing is trying too hard, but I just don’t see Monica flipping.

The irony is it’d probably be in her best interest to flip.  She’s pretty much reviled by the jury anyway, so she can’t win against anyone.  Might as well make yourself seem like less of a pawn towards them, and possibly beat Ciera.  True, you pretty much can’t beat Hayden, but unless the jury is EXTREMELY bitter, you can’t beat Tyson or Gervase either.  Better to take the risk in this situation.

The one good point about this episode is Tribal, where we get a lot of good wordplay sparring, and good points made by everyone (save Monica).  No one moment stands out to me, but it was a nice, strategic tribal.  In the end, anticlimax rules and Hayden is sent home.  Surprisingly, I’m a little sorry to see him go.  Yeah, he was generic for most of the show, but of late, he showed strategic chops, and could give the occasional funny soundbyte.  Good for you, Hayden, you’ve avoided “Survivor” obscurity.

Normally this is where I’d analyze the chances of the finalists, but I can’t do that because we don’t KNOW all the finalists yet.  Thank you Redemption Island!  God, I’m ready for the finale.  This episode was particularly boring, and while this season has surpassed my expectations, it’s still not the best, but I’ll talk more about that in the finale episode.

See you on Sunday!

-Matt

Title Credit to Jean Storrs.

Idol Speculation: “Survivor Blood vs. Water” Episode 12: A Black-Rock-Tie Affair

Our “Survivor” special today is a rare treat flown in from the Marquesas.  It’s our fabulous Stone Soup: A delightfully rare mixture, left to spoil by commercials that blatantly give away the outcome of the Tribal Council, with a piquant taste that ends in a thrilling anti-climax.  Truly, this is only the stuff of “Survivor” connoisseurs.

A delightful tease, to be sure, but we need to hit the main “Survivor” course before we get to dessert.  It seems our appetizer today is Hayden Flambé, so overstuffed that it’s overflowing.  Yes, these sorts of rants are a rare treat, only found by one fueled with rage at the loss of a close ally.  Granted the stuffing is nothing unusual, just the sort of “You’re giving the game to one person” rant.  While somewhat annoying and cliché, it does often ring true to the game situation when it’s given.  The Zapatera tribe of “Survivor Redemption Island” rejected this course, and perhaps that’s why they’re now slaving away in the kitchens of failure.  However, I’m certain that everyone here will at least somewhat seriously consider taking in this delicious…

GERVASE: I’M BEHIND THIS, MAN!

ME: Excuse me, sir, this is a fine “Survivor” Restaurant, after all, and I really must ask that you keep the volume down.

GERVASE: SCREW THAT NOISE!  I HAVEN’T BEEN GETTING NEARLY ENOUGH SCREEN TIME, AND IF REALITY TV HAS TAUGHT ME ANYTHING, IT’S THAT YELLING OBNOXIOUSLY THROUGHOUT AN EPISODE IS A SURE TICKET TO MORE SCREEN TIME.

ME: Very well, sir, but could you at least refrain from turning Hayden’s point into a joke.  I certainly accept that it doesn’t apply to you, as you’re in a good position.  I mean, you’ve had enough of a strategy that you can make an argument that you planned things, and Tyson seems to be taking the flak off of you.  There’s no reason for you to betray him right now, it’s disadvantageous.  For others, however…

GERVASE: THAT’S EXACTLY THE POINT, MAN!  I’M IN A PHENOMENAL POSITION, I’VE JUST GOT TO MAKE SURE THAT NOBODY ELSE SEES IT.  BY MAKING HAYDEN SEEM LIKE A JOKE, I PREVENT PEOPLE FROM ALLYING WITH HIM.  BESIDES, I’M THE ONE BEHIND THINGS!  I’VE HAD MY HAND ON TYSON’S BACK THE ENTIRE TIME!

ME: Please, sir, I don’t need to hear what you and Tyson have been up to when no one’s looking.

GERVASE: ALL RIGHT, I GUESS THAT’S ENOUGH FOR NOW, BUT DON’T LET THAT FOOL YOU!  I’LL BE BACK SOON ENOUGH.

Ugh, with that ruffian quieted down for the moment, I can introduce our next course.  A delicacy from Gabon: Stacked Deck-Sticks coated in Redemption Island Sauce.  Redemption Island sauce makes everything taste terrible, but our head chef, Jeff Probst, insist upon bringing it back.  I comfort myself that all it’s doing is making a mediocre dish look even more mediocre.  As I’ve stated before, I can’t stand Stacked Deck-Stick challenges.  Making a tower of cards just seems very un-“Survivor”, and this one does not even have the Balancing Bisque to offset the flavor.  The sooner this course is finished, the better.

Of course, no fine dinner is complete without table talk, and with Caleb, talk quickly turns to geographic relations.  Specifically, Caleb is calling the “Southerners Mean what they Say”  card, and cites Utah and Philadelphia as counter examples, clearly trying to single out and bait Gervase and Tyson.  Gervase takes the plunge, oddly not using the “It’s a game” argument, but instead opting to point out that Caleb himself betrayed Gervase and Tyson first.  Normally I’m not a fan of the times our guests use this argument, but in this case it’s actually justified, so I won’t throw any of them out.  Yet.

Still, for those in the “Duelist Suite”, it’s time to pay the bill, or else go home.  Laura Morett manages to pay things off easily, no surprises there, but finds that there’s no helping Tina out this time.  Indeed, talking to your opponent seems to be more of a detriment.  Neither Tina nor Caleb is able to pay in full, but a last minute wallet drop by Caleb that sends his money scattering around leads to his eviction.  Saddened, Head Chef Jeff Probst comes out to console Caleb with even more blatant and less pertinent leading questions than those served to Aras and Vytas.  Caleb does give us a funny line about how all he and Colton have in common is being male, and then leaves with little fanfare.  I’m not particularly sorry.  Though the man was good for a bit of a shake-up every now and again, he just wasn’t as good at the art of conversation as everyone else.

Ah yes, back to the Kasama Banquet Hall.  I see our next course of Idol-Hunting Stew has been served, and Laura has asked for a clue to be placed in Ciera’s bowl, and she decides to hold onto it, and smartly share it with her new allies Tyson, Gervase, and Monica.  The clue essentially reads as follows:

“The idol’s in a tree

that’s on the path to water.

If you can’t interpret that

you must be a big nutter.”

Poetry?  I think not, but it does get the alliance searching.  Hayden and Katie wisely decide to tail them and hunt as well, as the idol is pretty much Hayden’s only hope for not getting relegated to the “Duelist Suite”.  It seems that the alliance is one step ahead of him, however, and tricks him into thinking it’s on the ground.  Now if only Judd Sergeant of “Survivor Guatemala” had been that subtle.

Well, after a bit of searching, Tyson finds the idol again, thus somewhat nullifying his playing of it last episode.  He once again decides to hide it from his dining companions and… Please, sir, there’s no need to cry!  And you’re ruining the stew.  Look, I’m sure you love your girlfriend, and were sad when she left, but you can’t have come back to the game only for her.  Where’s the fight you had in you?

Ah well, while he’s getting his emotions in order, let’s check in on the conversation.  It seems that Hayden is talking to Gervase about not playing for second and how Gervase should join with himself and Katie and… wait, Gervase is in this conversation.  No.  No!  NO!  Stop right…

GERVASE: HAYDEN’S ONLY FOOLING HIMSELF, MAN!  THERE’S NO WAY I’D GO WITH HIM!  I’M SET UP WITH TYSON RIGHT NOW.  NO SENSE NOT KEEPING MY OPTIONS OPEN, BUT STILL, NOT GONNA FLIP RIGHT NOW.

ME: Once again, sir, you show great common sense, but I do wish you’d do it at a lower volume.

In any case, it’s time for the main course of this episode: Immunity Challenge Medley!  We’ve gathered the finest ingredients from around the “Survivor” World to bring you this dish.  We start off boldly with “Hold the small thing on the pole of ever-increasing length” from Samoa, give the flavor a kick with Balance Beam Bouillabaisse all the way from Borneo, and end in an unsatisfying, lackluster finish of Bamboo Shoot Knockdown from the Philippines.  And, as a kicker, it’s a la mode!  While the ending is a bit lame, and leaves something to be desired, this is still one of the best dishes we’ve served all season.  It’s a unique combination of flavors that will be remembered and retasted for hours afterward, and is a daring combination of skills that leaves at least this connoisseur thoroughly satisfied.

My, my!  I’ve never seen people eat with such gusto.  Big eater Monica seems to be the frontrunner, no surprise, but Gervase is right in there, and Tyson’s somehow still in the game at the end.  For once, a surprise: our victor is Gervase this time.  Most excellent job, sir.

GERVASE: AW YEAH, BABY!  YOU DON’T KNOW HOW LONG I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS!

ME: Well, you’ve earned it.  And the big surprise this week is that it’s buy 1 get 2 free.  Two other tablemates will also be receiving the a la mode.

GERVASE: OH YEAH!  I’M GOING WITH MONICA AND TYSON!

ME: Excellent choices, sir.  They reaffirm your alliance, and surprise no one.  Plus, by inviting several people, you make it so that at worst, you split the vote evenly.

But it seems there’s been a complaint.  Hayden does not think that eating a la mode right at the table is dignified, and uses this as a conversation starter with Ciera.  He points out, rightly I might add, that’s she’s fourth, and it might be good for her to therefore jump ship and hopefully have a shot at the final three.  When she seems hesitant, Hayden pulls the “Gervase is with us.” play in the hope that Gervase is actually with them.  Gervase looks up from his a la mode long enough to inform Hayden that he isn’t, as there’s no strategic to either himself or Ciera.  Himself, I’ll agree with, but not Ciera.  While I personally would rather have Tyson, Gervase, and Monica around to the end, Ciera’ best move, at this point, is to vote off one of the three, thereby securing herself as a strategic threat, and also ensuring that she’s in the final 3, a truly desirable table setting if ever there was one.  However, she flatly rejects the offer along with Gervase.  I’m sure nothing else will come of it.

Before we serve up the final course, I think it’s time for some closing speeches.  We’ve heard most of them, expertly picked apart and twisted by Hayden to try and get Ciera to flip.  I must admit, though the outcome seems a foregone conclusion, he’s doing an amazing job of arguing his case.  Why, I’m almost tempted to join him, and I’m not even attending the dinner.  Only one person has yet to speak.

GERVASE: THAT’S BULL!

ME: What is, sir?

GERVASE: WHAT HAYDEN JUST SAID ABOUT CIERA BEING ON THE BOTTOM!  WE’VE BEEN STRAIGHT UP WITH HER FROM THE BEGINNING, WE’RE HONEST GUYS WHEN PEOPLE ARE HONEST WITH US.

ME: Frankly, sir, that’s the TRUE bullshit.  And really, can you quiet down?  They can hear you over in the “Duelist Section”.  They’re laughing their heads off right now at that statement.

GERVASE: I DON’T CARE IF IT’S FALSE!  I DON’T CARE IF IT ISN’T HELPING MY POSITION AT ALL.  IT’S THE TRUTH, OR AT LEAST THAT’S WHAT I WANT CIERA TO THINK.  AND IF IT DOES COME TO A TIE, YOU CAN BET I’M GOING TO MAKE THE SITUATION WORSE BY INSISTING UPON DRAWING ROCKS, AND NOT LEAVING ANY ROOM FOR DIPLOMACY.

This needs to end, and it needs to end now.  I’m skiving off my shift early so that I don’t have to put up with any more of Gervase’s yelling.  Still, I should probably finish summing up the episode.  Against all odds, Ciera does the right thing twice, and for the first time since “Survivor Marquesas”, we go to a tiebreaker of drawing rocks.  I would say purple rocks, but it seems that while the rocks were to have been color-coordinated to the season originally, they’ve now stopped doing that so as to stock the same rocks, and are simply going with black and while.  Either that, or “Survivor” is now sponsored by the Black Panthers, as when drawing rocks, black is good and white is bad.  Pretty much everyone agrees to do the rocks, though Tyson (one of the three now vulnerable, along with Katie and Ciera) tries to diplomacy things away, to no avail.  In the end, we get a major anticlimax of Katie going home, and I’m certainly not sorry.  Though she was my female pick to win the whole thing, and she did pretty well, she was just kind of boring.  even Hayden managed to redeem himself this episode with great strategic gameplay.  Overall, I have to say I was also happy to see a tie that was NOT AT THE FINAL 4 for the first time in a long time.  So, why do I call it spoiled?  Well, because the commercials on tv left ABSOLUTELY no doubt that they were going to rocks. I could understand HINTING that the rocks might be drawn.  Indeed, that might even have been more surprising, as most would assume that the commercial would exaggerate, and then turn out to be true.  But no, they outright say that the rocks will be drawn, eliminating the tension from the episode for all who saw it.  The anticlimactic result was also a downer, though I am overall happy with the outcome, and had to admit there was some logic to Gervase’s insistence on going to rocks.  His alliance only had a 33.4% chance of losing that gamble, to a 66.6% chance for the others.

So yeah, I liked this episode for some rare events and GREAT strategy (even if Gervase was a bit annoying), but before I end it off, since I’ve never had the chance before, let me give my thoughts on the use of the rock tiebreaker.  I’m of two minds about this strategy, as when I first came upon it, I despised it.  It seemed totally unfair to me that the people who were voted for become immune, and I just couldn’t find any logic to it.  In the intervening years, however, I have overcome the issue of “fairness” on “Survivor”, and have also figured out the motive for this particular tiebreaker method.  Specifically, it discourages ties.  I suspect some focus group somewhere said that ties aren’t good tv, and so by making yourself vulnerable by forcing a tie, it discourages them.  On the other hand, I contest the “ties aren’t good tv” bit, by pointing out how marketable this tie was for the show.  Overall, I still don’t like it very much, and think the true thing to do would be to have the people voted for draw rocks, but I can sympathize with the producers.

Things are heating up, so I’d better cool off.  See you next week!

-Matt

Title Credit to Jean Storrs.

Idol Speculation: “Survivor Blood vs. Water” Episode 11: Painful, yet Delicious

Remember all those nice things I said about Ciera last episode?   How she was an underappreciated strategist who knew just when to cut her loved ones loose?  Yeah, I take that all back.  She did a pretty good job last episode, but she really just WRECKED her position this episode.  I mean, she came out on top, so I guess it’s all right, all things considered, but still, this was a MAJOR strategic gaffe for Ciera.

Let’s take things from the top, however.  We start off at Kasama, where, true to form, everyone is trying to comfort the loved one of the boot, in this case, Ciera.  For once, though, the loved one doesn’t need consoling, as Ciera admits that she is oddly ok with the whole situation.  Don’t let her outward appearance fool you, though.  Ciera cares deeply about her mom.  She loves her very much, and is torn up about voting her out.  You can tell by how she stares blankly at the camera, while monotonously insisting that she really does care about her mom.  Deeply.  Truly.  Sincerely.

The rest of the cast takes this vote with varying degrees of apprehension.  Hayden seems pretty appalled that, as he puts it “Water won out over Blood”.  Really, guy, the title was dumb enough on its own, we don’t need you reminding us that it’s lame.  Tyson, on the other hand, is somewhat proud of her, knowing that it was a tough decision.  At the same time, however, he’s apprehensive, since this means that Ciera is playing hard, and consequently might be a threat to him.

But of course, we can’t get to our lack of an intro without a Redemption Island scene.  As Tina and Vytas confer, while Tina holds a teddy bear (nice touch), they agree that it’s more than likely that Katie is the one who got the boot.  Things seem to be confirmed when the bootee calls out “Mom!” to get their attention.  It turns out to be an actually funny joke, however, as it was Laura who got voted out.  This funny scene only lasts a short while, unfortunately, as we then get into Laura’s “I’m so Proud” speech again.  While I enjoyed it last episode, it’s gotten old REALLY fast, and I wish it would go away very quickly.  As such, we’ll skip over the rest of Redemption Island and head right to the challenge.

Once again, we get a combination challenge.  Duelists must push four blocks through a net (the concept of which comes from “Survivor Thailand”), and then use those blocks, which are colored on all sides, to create a tower 4 blocks high which has no duplicate colors on any sides (“Survivor Samoa”).  Like the last few duels, I really can’t find it in my heart to hate this challenge.  Yes, it’s reused, but it’s a combination of reused that we’ve never seen before.  While it’s lacking a bit in the physical challenge department,  it’s a pretty tough puzzle, particularly when one is dehydrated, starving, and presumably low on sleep.  I’ll give this season one thing: while I will never love or accept Redemption Island as a concept, I’m hating it less and less as the season goes on.

Probst tries to get Laura to cry and rant at her daughter on national tv, but once he sees that Laura’s gearing up for her “I’m so Proud” speech again, he quickly and rightly decides to drop the subject, and head straight to the challenge instead.  This one seems to me like more of a dead heat than the last one, but that might not be the case.  Tina falls quickly behind, even being lapped by both Vytas and Laura.  All three end up at the puzzle at the same time, though, and the race is on.  Laura finishes first, but this is not all that surprising.  Not only is Laura a challenge beast, but she’s also done this puzzle before.  At first she seems determined not to have another Kat situation on her hands, and spins her puzzle around so no one can look at it.  Later, though, she starts whispering the solution to Tina.  Given how loud her “whispering” is, I’m amazed Vytas can’t hear it, so I’m chalking it up to the microphones they put on people before challenges.  I have to admit, this surprised me.  It’s a bit of strategy I’ve never thought of before, but it’s clever: help the weaker person on Redemption Island, so you have an easier match to get back in the game.  Laura’s flaw, in my opinion, is choosing to help Tina.  I admit, on paper you’d want to get rid of Vytas as quickly as possible, but I think this is a fallacy.  While she’s no Vytas, Tina is pretty tough when it comes to challenges, and if you underestimate her, she’ll almost DEFINITELY come back to bite you.  On top of that, thus far challenges to get back in the game have been all about endurance, and the lighter, determined people are generally the biggest threats, not the guys with muscles.  Still, can’t fault the strategy in and of itself, only the target.

You also can’t fault its effectiveness, as Tina edges out Vytas by a manner of seconds, sending Vytas to the jury to hang with brother Aras.  This saddens me, as of the three, I least wanted Vytas to go.  He had some funny moments, was a likeable guy, and a more than decent strategist.  I look forward to seeing him in another “All-Stars” season.  Probst once again tries to get Vytas to give a big speech about his and Aras’ relationship, but Vytas rebukes him, and Probst lets the matter drop so Vytas can leave with dignity.

But then there’s that matter of the idol clue to deal with.  Laura, not too surprisingly, gives it to Ciera, who throws it in the fire.  Man, I love the look on Probst’s face when he sees it happening again, you know it’s killing him.  Still, to Ciera’s credit, this is the one smart move she makes all episode.  After last night, she needs hold true to the “Loyal to Tyson’s Alliance” ideal, and that means not taking a clue to make it look like you’re sneaking behind their backs.  Plus, it helps keep up her “I’ve already found the idol.” lie with Katie.  Good for you Ciera.  Enjoy the praise, it won’t last long.

Back at camp, we at long last get to the “good” part of the episode.  The quotation marks are because “good” refers to the entertainment value of said segment, not the quality of some of the strategy.  Tyson is, quite naturally, worried about his position in the game.  He wants Katie off badly, partly because she’s a jury threat, and partly because he wants to maintain control.  And for once, his fears are founded, as Hayden and Caleb have chosen this moment to break free of the shackles of Tyson.  Shock of all shocks, they’ve figured out that he’s a tough fight in the finals, and that therefore it might be wiser to take him out well before the end.  They seem to be talking two or three votes in advance, but when Caleb goes to let Katie in on the plan, he acts as though it’s the upcoming vote.  Um, might want to get your stories straight there, gents.  Well, it’s still a really good plan.  It pretty much guarantees either Hayden or Caleb a victory (as they’re both likeable and can claim to have been strategic), and gives Katie a solid alliance.  All they need is a fourth, and Ciera seems to be that fourth.

Once again the swing vote, Ciera is brought into the fold of Hayden and Caleb, who offer her final four to go with them.  Ciera agrees to their faces, but then admits to the cameras that she’s not buying it.  She thinks that they don’t know how to play the game, and that the experienced players are a safer bet.  Here’s where Ciera’s stupidity really shines through.  For one thing, she clearly hasn’t seen other seasons with returning players battling newcomers.  If you’re a newcomer, NEVER trust a returnee to the end.  Experience goes a long way in this game, and however good you think you are, they’ll run circles around you.  For another matter, her chances are better with Hayden and Caleb than with Tyson and Gervase (assuming that Gervase isn’t going anywhere, as long as Tyson has a say).  One could make the argument that Tyson and Gervase have annoyed more people, but I’d counter that Ciera has a better argument for being the brains behind everything with Hayden and Caleb.  Unless this is an EXCEPTIONALLY bitter jury, that’s likely to be her argument, and it works better with Hayden and Caleb.  Further, if they’re less skilled in the game, you want them in the end as they’re easier to beat.  I admit that it’s probably a tougher call than I’m making it out to be, but for my money, she should have gone with Hayden and Caleb.  Kept playing both sides, to be sure, but ultimately sided with Hayden and Caleb.  And to those complaining about my praising of her throwing away the clue earlier, when I said the benefit was showing loyalty to the Tyson alliance, and now saying she should go against it, I liked the move when the Tyson alliance was sticking together.  If they’re splitting, it changes things.

Generic scenes of Tyson and Gervase being paranoid follow before we get something completely different: HAYDEN being paranoid!  All the difference in the world.  Give the man props, though, he notices that Ciera and Tyson have become quite chummy, going off to tree mail in a very blatant display of power.  I would say he was being excessively paranoid, that one trip to tree mail means nothing, but in this case he’s actually right, so I have to chalk it up to smarts on his part.  Still, it wouldn’t surprise me to learn that Hayden had witnessed a few other chummy moments beforehand.

FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, ENOUGH WITH THE REDONE CHALLENGES ALREADY!  Today’s challenge is from “Survivor Philippines”, in which tribe members have to hold a twisting bar with rope wrapped around it still as long as possible.  At the other end is a bucket of sand with a given percentage of their body weight.  Last person with a bucket in the air wins immunity.  This is probably one of the fairer challenges “Survivor” has ever done, due to having no perceptible gender bias (the men tend to have greater upper body strength, but the women tend to be lighter), but it just looks stupid and doesn’t hold my attention.  For another thing, IT’S NOT ORIGINAL!

Hey, Probst is announcing a twist!  Listen to that dramatic music, it must be something new and Earth-shattering to make up for this piss-poor challenge!  Nope, it’s the old “Eat-or-Compete” twist, now with annoying hashtag to match!  I do like this twist, and how it reveals the pecking order, but it’s often painful (and delicious) to watch, and it’s just been done to death, change it up already.

Sure enough, the pecking order is revealed as Tyson, Gervase, and Ciera all choose to sit out and eat.  If walking off to tree mail wasn’t an obvious indicator that Ciera was with Tyson and Gervase, this most certainly was.  This fuels Hayden’s desire to win, and he makes a good show of it.  He even puts up with Probst’s attempts to destroy the games of Tyson, Gervase, and Ciera by making them out to be similar to spectators at a gladiator match.  I’d say the metaphor would be more apt for Redemption Island, but that would insult Probst’s brainchild, and there’s no way he’d stand for that.  Not the most egregious example, as Probst has done similar commentary on those who eat in the past, but this somehow seems more mean-spirited, and serves as another instance of Probst influencing the game too much.

Despite Hayden’s best efforts, Monica takes home immunity.  Ok, I knew she was better in challenges than she looked, but I never realized she was this much of a BEAST!  Man, we need to start considering her a real physical threat.  Could do without the constant “I’m doing it for my kids” speech, though.

So we head back to camp and back in time, as Hayden is still going on about his paranoia over Ciera.  What I like, though, is that this time it’s more justified, and that he actually DOES SOMETHING ABOUT IT!  Take note, cast of “Survivor One World”.

Hayden’s solution is that, if he can’t get a majority with Ciera, but has Caleb and Katie loyal to him, he might as well make sure that, if not Tyson, it’s not himself, Caleb or Katie.  To this end, he and Caleb agree to go to Tyson, and make out that Ciera was lying, playing both sides, and therefore ought to be voted off.  Not a bad plan, but in my opinion, not an idea one.  True, should it work, they will tie for majority, but it’s be better to have majority outright, and to that end, I thought they should have approached Monica.  It’s unlikely to work, to be sure, but if they get her paranoid about Tyson (potentially bringing up her challenge wins as a reason she might be a target), and promise her final 3 (no one else has done that yet), she might go with it.  Not what I’d have done, but can’t fault the logic of their plan.

I find their performance for Tyson unconvincing, but Tyson does become suspicious, and Hayden seems to think that Tyson’s still on their side.  Caleb is unconvinced, perhaps because they’re targeting him over Hayden for no discernible reason, but we see that Tyson is talking things over with Gervase right before they head off to Tribal, which I have to say, is one of the better ones of the season.  Not a lot to say about it, but there were a lot of good social politicking moments, particularly Gervase’s appeal to Hayden fooling Hayden into thinking all was well.

But then, right before the votes are read, we see that Ciera is not the ONLY one who can make boneheaded moves.  Tyson, after comedically searching for it (I thought perhaps he was joking at first), plays his idol, in what was a completely pointless move.  It’s easy to say that, admittedly, as we all knew Tyson was not in actual danger this vote, and he had reason to be paranoid, but I’d argue he went to far.  Pretty much nothing Ciera said indicated that she would go against Tyson, and Hayden and Caleb would have had to put on quite an act to pull the wool over Tyson’s eyes that well.  Further, the downside to hiding the idol from everyone else is that it makes everyone paranoid about you once you reveal it.  I applaud Tyson’s cautions, but in this scenario, the risks outweigh the benefits.

Caleb goes home, in what I think was the smartest move for Tyson, Gervase, Ciera, and Monica.  While getting rid of Ciera might have kept the peace, Caleb’s a bigger threat overall (at least physically), is at least as likeable as Ciera, and gives them a solid majority, rather than a 3-3 tie with Hayden, Caleb, and Katie had they voted out Ciera.  As to Caleb’s leaving, I’m not sorry.  He wasn’t painful, unlikeable, or dumb, but his flashes of brilliance were scattered and infrequent, and compared to everyone else (save Katie) he’s just not that interesting.  I like the guy, but I won’t miss him.

As to this episode, despite the strategy not coming to much of anything, I liked it.  For all that I was prepared for letdown on the “Tyson May Go Home” plot, it still kept me guessing, and balanced out dumb strategy with intriguing strategy, and while it was the most edge-of-your-seat exciting episode ever, it was still a good watch.  Can’t wait for the next one!

-Matt

Title Credit to Jean Storrs.

Idol Speculation: “Survivor Blood vs. Water” Episode 10: The Long Goodbye

Obvious outcome is obvious.  However, this is one of those rare episodes where I don’t actually mind that you could tell before the lack of an intro exactly who it was who would be going.  Yes, there was barely any suspense, but it had great editing, great clips, and even a good bit of strategy here and there.  Definitely the first good episode we’ve had since the merge, but let’s not get too far ahead of ourselves.

Fresh from Tribal Council, we get Katie lamenting her situation.  Strategize though she might, she just can’t seem to break the block set up by Tyson.  Still, she soldiers on, realizing that the next obvious recourse is to hunt like crazy for the hidden immunity idol.  The fact that Tyson has it means that this plan is pretty much worthless, but given the information Katie has at this point, it’s understandable.

Thankfully keeping a discreet distance, Ciera and Laura celebrate being the last pair in the game, despite the fact that Laura should have been gone about 12 days ago.  They keep it small and intimate, which is nice.  However, while Laura continues the nice sentiment in her private interview, Ciera is not so optimistic.  She correctly realizes that A: Her Mom is not very popular, B: Her Mom is something of a physical and mental threat, and therefore C: Her Mom is likely to be voted off sooner rather than later.  While Ciera understandably wants to work with her mother (it’s an extra vote that you have, essentially, and probably the closest you can come in the game to actual trust with someone else), she realizes that this is an individual game, and she has an actual shot to win, and therefore it might be in her best interest to vote Laura off.  This is one of the good things about this season: it brings out these sort of ethical dilemmas.  It’s true, they come up in other seasons, but the genetic link just makes it all that more personal, as well as more compelling.  I respect Ciera, even if I’m not the hugest fan of her, but tonight I was riveted by her confessionals, which was probably a good thing, as they made up approximately half of the episode.

Sweeping over to Redemption Island we see that Aras, Vytas, and Tina will be facing a repeat of a repeat.  It’s the Redemption Island challenge in which Cochran nearly beat Challenge Jesus (my heart quivers with joy at the memory) from “Survivor South Pacific”:  After using a grappling hook to retrieve 3 bags, the duelists must take a small ball from one of the bags, and navigate it through a maze to an end slot.  First to finish gets to give away a clue to the hidden immunity idol, last place becomes the first member of the jury.  I must say, although this challenge is very derivative (notably, it’s very similar to a couple challenges from “Survivor Marquesas”), it hasn’t been done in a while, and I give it a pass just for the good Cochran memories.

So, it looks like we’ll have a jury of 8 and a final 3 once again this season.  Joy.

Normally, I’d give good odds that Tina would lose a Redemption Island duel against Aras and Vytas.  This is not to dis her challenge skills by any means, far from it.  Tina, while not a physical force, does hold her own very well in the challenges, particularly when factoring in her age.  So, it’s not that she’s bad, by any stretch, but just that Aras and Vytas are EXTREMELY good.  This challenge, though, is not one where physical strength is necessarily an asset.  It’s more about dexterity and balance, which could go either way.  My only concern for Tina is the grappling hook leg of the challenge, and if she can survive that, she might just have a shot at this challenge.

And survive she does, somehow edging out Aras and Vytas on the grappling hook.  After a funny moment in which Aras encourages Laura to encourage him as well (she’d previously encouraged Tina and Vytas), things end up fairly even on the maze.  A mistake by Tina means that Vytas gets first place, and I start to feel sorry for Tina, given that she was doing so well.  It seems that mazes and Aras don’t agree, however, as Tina still manages to survive, and given all her effort, I’m happy for her.  Plus, it’s Aras, in my opinion the most boring of the three, who leaves.  Can’t say I’m too sorry over all.  While he did surpass my expectations strategically, he was still pretty boring in interviews, and made some pretty dumb moves.  And to all you Aras fans out there, don’t worry, he’s still on the jury, you can see him.

Before he leaves, however, Probst tries to make Aras and Vytas epically recount their life story, as well as give contrived platitudes about how their relationship has changed and will continue to change.  Vytas gains respect in my eyes by cheekily saying that he doesn’t think their relationship has changed very much.  Since no one questions Probst, though, Vytas is forced to give the platitude anyway.  Bummer.  I liked his first answer better.

Vytas decides to give his clue to Katie, who, wisely realizing that she can’t get much more on the chopping block than she already is, keeps the clue.  Back at the camp, Katie publicly announces her bathroom break.  Everyone at camp wisely realizes that either Katie is something of an odd duck, or she’s going idol hunting.  As it’s the latter, everyone hilariously lampshades it, while Laura suggests, not unreasonably, hiding all their digging tools to make like harder for Katie.  It doesn’t matter, though, as we see that for the time being Katie has absolutely no success in finding the idol.

Meanwhile, Laura goes in for another counseling session with Ciera, where we once again reaffirm that Ciera is more than willing to vote off her mother, while Laura remains perfectly naïve about the threat that she poses.  The one interesting bit is Ciera’s current advice to her mother, which is to not go around strategizing, and to wait for Tyson to make the first move.  On the surface, this could be seen as legitimate advice to prevent people getting paranoid about Laura, but it could also be read as a self-serving move by Ciera.  If her mom isn’t strategizing, it’s all that much easier for Ciera to control things.  You go, girl!

Speaking of Tyson making moves, he decides it’s time to have an interview or two, and comes to the same conclusion that Ciera has.  He admits that Laura’s a threat, both as an individual and as part of a pair, and therefore needs to go.  Thinking at first that he can do it without Ciera, he approaches Hayden and Caleb with the proposal to eliminate Laura rather than Monica should Katie win immunity.  This serves only to give Hayden another generic interview, but it is good strategy on Tyson’s part, save for one caveat.  He admits that it’s another betrayal, which makes him look more like a villain, at a point where jury management becomes a big factor.  Look, Tyson, I appreciate the improved strategic game, but you need to consider not being the messenger for once.  Try and NOT make people feel betrayed by you.

Enough about that, though, as we’ve come to it, the emotional heart of the episode, the thing that makes it just so great.  Ciera, unable to contain herself any longer, takes her Mom down the beach, and admits that she’s probably going to have to vote her off fairly soon, probably at the next Tribal Council.  Laura, naturally, protests, pointing out that it might be short-sighted of Ciera, as the guys probably won’t take her to the end, anyway.  Still, she’s not mean about it, Ciera seems appropriately embarrassed, and Laura goes so far as to admit that despite this being a game, she’s able to separate out being proud of her daughter for coming into her own.  Ciera, for her part, puts things gently, explaining via sand diagram exactly why things will come down to Laura being voted out.  I LOVE this scene.  Not only was it handled well by the players, but it was shot and edited impeccably.  The action felt intimate, we heard just enough to understand the situation, while at the same time not seeing so much as to make it repetitive, and it was just gorgeously done!  On top of that, the music was impeccable!  Music, in my opinion, is an underappreciated aspect of “Survivor”.  As you might expect, we don’t think about it very much, but you notice its absence.  This time, those absences were used perfectly.  The music added to the emotion, while not being overpowering, and particularly emotional moments were underscored by silence.  My hat’s off to the composers on this one, they were really on the ball.

Katie mentioning that she needs immunity leads us to today’s challenge, hailing this time from “Survivor Nicaragua”.  Castaways hold on to a rope while standing on an angled platform.  Overtime, they inch down the rope, until they fall into the drink.  Last person standing wins.  As repeat challenges go, this one isn’t bad.  It’s only been done on “Survivor Nicaragua”, it’s a good endurance challenge, and is a solid idea all things considered.  I do take issue with it being a repeat challenge, as well as the fact that it’s neither big nor epic, but I’ll let it live.

This challenge is good news for Katie, as being about balance and holding your weight, it favors the small and the skinny.  Katie, however, is out somewhat early, leaving Monica, who was not even a target this time around, with immunity, and the extra reward of a cheeseburger feast.  Yeah, did I mention that I HATE REDEMPTION ISLAND FOR ELIMINATING REWARD CHALLENGES?  BECAUSE I DO!  Still, Monica handles it all with grace, giving up her feast for the losers (which I’m somewhat surprised Probst allowed, as it lowers the drama somewhat).  Probst questions Caleb as to whether this was a personal or strategic move, because lord knows Caleb needs SOMETHING to talk about.  Caleb wisely points out that the move can be both, and everyone save Monica enjoys their burgers.  I would point out that this is kind of a double-edged sword for Monica, as it makes her more of a jury threat, but since she has immunity, it’s not as much of a concern.

Hey!  Who left the transition snake on the Kasama camp set?  You know that the castaways and the transition animals must NEVER been seen in the same shot.  Oh, great, there goes the meta-meter.  The episode is ruined.

Not to be deterred by errant transition animals, Katie attempts to seize the day with another idol hunt.  Laura, desperate to save her own skin, does the smart thing of tailing Katie and digging where she digs, so as to keep Katie from finding the idol.  What do you know, a move from Laura that actually makes sense!  Never thought I’d see the day.

Tyson, however, still wants his screen time.  He decides that Ciera ought to be approached, so as not to offend her by blindsiding both her and her mother.  Ciera, however, is one step ahead of him, anticipates the move, and smartly agrees to go along with it.  Man, Ciera has really upped her game this episode.  Tyson also seems to have learned from his earlier errors, as he pins the blame for the idea on Hayden and Caleb, rather than himself.

So, the plan seems set, but Tyson still won’t tell people he has the idol (good man), so what’re they going to do about Katie.  In yet ANOTHER brilliant strategic move, Ciera bluffs Katie into giving up that she didn’t find the idol, by saying that she (Ciera) did.  It’s two people bluffing each other, and although it seemed comedic at first, it became very serious and game-changing.  Katie’s falling first makes her lose power, and doesn’t give her much of a position in the tribe.  It does, however, boost Ciera’s position, as she’s now the one with a link to Katie, and therefore potentially another vote in an emergency situation.

The one department in which Ciera falters is in not bragging.  She admits her scheming ways after the fact to Tyson, who clearly sees this as a threat.  This not only cements Laura’s doom, but also makes Ciera more of an obvious threat, where one of her great strengths originally was her ability to blend in and not be considered a threat.  It wouldn’t surprise me if Tyson was on the warpath for her in the next few episodes.

Probst wisely just lets things run at Tribal Council, as we get Laura giving saving herself the old college try.  She has a few compelling arguments, pointing out that a pair in the game is two votes for the price of one, and that one of a pair on the jury and one in the finals is a vote everyone but the loved one won’t get, but unsurprisingly, that doesn’t work too well.  So Laura is gone, and while I still don’t like her and am happy to see the back of her, she did leave in such a manner that I at least respect her more now.

This episode was not particularly surprising, but it didn’t have to be.  It used pathos effectively, it kept me interested (if not fooled), and it showcased some good strategic thinking, so I’m quite fond of it.  It’s not earth-shattering, but still quite good.

Still, this blog feels short, and this was such an emotional episode that it merits a:

TOP 5 AND BOTTOM 5!

Today’s subject is emotional boots.  Every Tribal has a tone to it, and while most are fairly average, some are really respectful, and some are downright bitter.  As such, the Top 5 list will be happy/respectful boots, while the bottom 5 bitter boots.  With that, I present to you:

TOP 5

5. Christina Cha (“Survivor One World”): Kind of a stretch, as the vote off itself wasn’t really respectful, but I did like the fact that, whatever Probst made out, Christina really didn’t defend herself against the at that point inevitable, and just enjoyed her last day.  However stupid it may have been, she went out on her own terms, and that’s respectable, at the very least.

4. Laura Morett (“Survivor Blood vs. Water): As I said before, beautifully edited, easy to watch, and overall just made for a good episode.  Only loses its higher spot on the list because most of the emotion happened before Tribal Council, not at it.

3. Rudy Boesch (“Survivor All-Stars”): A bit of an odd choice, as it was a blindside of a poor old guy doing the best that he could.  What puts this on the list is a genuine, heartfelt speech by Probst after Rudy left. It felt right, it showed respect, and made the blindside much more pleasant.  See there, Probst, I don’t hate EVERYTHING you do!

2. Ian Rosenberger (“Survivor Palau”): Yes, “Survivor’s” first ever impromptu Tribal Council was also one of the most touching.  We’d seen Ian struggle, both physically and mentally, over the last several episode, but it climaxed at the final 3 immunity challenge, where after 10 hours on a buoy, Ian stepped down after getting Tom to promise that he WOULDN’T take Ian to the finals.  I didn’t put it in the top spot on the list, because it was kind of a stupid move on Ian’s part, but still a very sweet moment nonetheless.

1. Dan “Dan Fuego” Barry (“Survivor Exile Island”): Without a doubt the most respectful Tribal Council I’ve ever seen.  La Mina didn’t want to vote out what was effectively their patriarch, nor did they like kicking an old man when he was down.  But they had to, and so they agreed, not only to tell Dan, but to defend him on a united front at Tribal Council.  Dan scrambled, to be sure, but he accepted his fate with good grace, and this Tribal Council just felt right for him.

Honorable Mention: Russell Hantz (“Survivor Redemption Island”): Not a particularly respectful vote, but one that makes me happy nonetheless.

 

BOTTOM 5

5. Benjamin “Coach” Wade (“Survivor Tocantins”): This one might have seemed respectful, and Coach really wanted to make it grand and epic.  And in part, he succeeded.  However, some of the voting confessionals (not undeservedly) trashed Coach, perhaps to the point of excess.  I’m no big Coach fan, so I didn’t mind that much, but it still felt a bit mean-spirited.

4. Keith Tollefson (“Survivor South Pacific”): While I side with Cochran on this issue, and admit that Keith didn’t have that bad of a time at Tribal Council, he still bore the brunt of the blame for being horrible to Cochran, when I’d say Ozzy and Jim Rice were both more to blame for that.  Kind of a bland character, but I still have a soft spot for the guy.  He didn’t quite deserve the trashing he got.

3. Jane Bright (“Survivor Nicaragua”): Much like with Laura Morett’s boot tonight, this one was mainly unpleasant before Tribal Council.  Tribal, however, was not easy for Jane either.  I liked Jane ok, so to see her be fairly unceremoniously booted off was a bit disappointing, but I understood its necessity.  Her complaining and haranguing of people just strategizing like they were supposed to really just made everything worse.

2. Randy Bailey (“Survivor Gabon”): Like Russell Hantz, this was someone I was glad to see voted out.  However that does not excuse the wasting of an excellent quality fake idol on a practical joke, that was meant merely to humiliate a man on national tv.  Shame on you, Sugar.

1. Lex van den Berghe (“Survivor All-Stars”): This was a fairly heated Tribal Council, but nothing special on the surface.  Dig deeper, however, and you find a barrel of unpleasantness that was the way Boston Rob (“Survivor Marquesas”) handled it.  On top of that, the All-Star season just felt more personal, making this vote most painful to watch of all.

Honorable Mention: Gretchen Cordy (“Survivor Borneo”): At the time, this was the height of dishonor, as it went against what people thought the game should be.  However, interviews after the fact reveal that people really loved Gretchen, and hated doing that vote.  For this reason, it needs mentioning, even if it can’t be on the list proper.

So there you have it!  See you all for what is hopefully an even better episode next week!

-Matt

Title Credit to Jean Storrs.

Idol Speculation: “Survivor Blood vs. Water” Episode 9: Cheeseburger Debates

Ladies and Gentlemen!  Please welcome tonight’s opening act, the Great Vytas-ini, the world’s worst magician!  Watch as he manages to make any tension during the first half of the episode DISAPPEAR!  And let’s not forget his lovely assistants, the “Survivor” Editing Team, who will do the same for the second half of the episode.  Before our show starts, however, a few reminders.  Please be aware that any photographic and video recording devices are not permitted during the show.  Anyone found with such devices will have them confiscated, and be asked to leave the premises.  Smoking is not permitted in the theatre, and for the kindness of your fellow audience members, please turn off all things electronic and beeping.  We’d also like to take this time to mention the fact that our show is sponsored by:

MATT’S MESS-UP!

Yes, this mess-up is a bit unique, in that it actually spans two blogs!  I meant to comment on this in the last one, but due to sheer length, and a lot happening in that episode, I forgot to.  As such I will address it now.  My mess-up is that, during the episode where Kat got voted off, I neglected to deride her for her complaints that Laura M. was “cheating” by looking at John’s puzzle.  To be fair, I derided Kat for a lot of things, but that’s no excuse to miss this one.  I’ve complained about others doing it in the past, and Kat is no exception.  It’s “Survivor”.  The concept of fairness is minimal at best.  Your job is to get ahead of the competition by any means necessary.  If they neglect to cover up or destroy their puzzle, use that to your advantage.  I’ve heard some people claim that it truly is unfair as Laura had a better vantage point that Kat, but again, since when is “Survivor” fair?  Also, Kat could either A: have looked on Laura’s puzzle since Laura was further ahead of her at that time, or B: run over to John’s puzzle, either to destroy it or get a better look.  And yet, rather than be proactive, Kat instead chose to complain and lose.  Did I mention how glad I am that she’s gone?

Well, moving on to the episode, we see that Super Vytas is using his power of super serenity (no, it is not the super power to summon “Purple Brenda” Lowe from “Survivor Caramoan”), to keep himself outwardly calm in the face of Aras’ exit.  Privately, he admits that it tears him up inside, and that he wants revenge, particularly against Tyson, but to the public eye, he soldiers on.  Good for him.  I’ve said in the past that I understand the reactions of the betrayed, but think it’d be in their best interests to keep it under wraps.  Vytas lives that out.  Good for you, man.  Props also go to Tyson for unflinchingly schmoozing Vytas by going up and hugging him, despite having just voted off his closest ally.

Of course, for every good bit of strategy, there is a bad one, and Kasama is no exception.  Tina, of all people, falls victim to bad social posturing by doing the old “Call out the betrayers by saying they’ll get no votes at final tribal” gambit.  Yes, she’s clearly frustrated at the betrayal, and I don’t begrudge her those emotions.  However, this is a STUPID way to go about expressing them, as it only angers the people you want to keep you in the game.  And this coming from TINA, one of the best social game players in the early seasons.  God, Tina, what happened to you?  Also, I have to say, I find the argument that Tina’s using unjustified, and not just because it didn’t include Gervase when he was the one made out to be the biggest traitor.  It’s true, betray does bring animosity, but not everyone on the jury will see it that way, and if the finals are made up of ONLY traitors, well, you have to give the million to one of them!  There, perfect counter-argument, Tina has no leg to stand on.

Fortunately, as seems to be often the case on this show, morning brings sanity, and Tina, realizing her days are numbered, releases Katie from any ties to her.  Tina thinks Katie has a better shot than she does to stay (despite the fact that for most of the episode, Katie is the name of the two that’s bandied about more), and should not hold herself to one alliance just because Tina is her mother.  I both love and hate this scene.  I love it because it gives Katie the freedom to make moves, and prevents any angry family war scenes that I feared at the start of this season.  I hate it because it’s a bad move for Tina.  In the face of this sort of coalition, you will unite, or you will fall.  Tina, your move with Katie was very classy, but it’s just not smart.  Unless you two plan to split the money should only one of you win, in which case I’m VERY annoyed at this season, as such a pact ruins the gameplay.  Katie makes the token “I don’t know how I’ll do it.” speech, which I buy in that Katie hasn’t had much gameplay experience, and therefore probably DOESN’T know how to proceed.  Anyway, the two come back from tree-mail, and we head to a challenge.

Let’s get ready to RUUUUUUUUUMBLE!  You’ve seen the epicness that was “The Rumble in the Jungle”.  You’ve heard of the mighty clash of titans in “The Thrilla in Manila”.  But now, Ladies and Gentlemen, prepare yourself for the ultimate clash of the titans, a battle for the ages, the one that will decide, once and for all, who the supreme being is.  Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you “The Commotion by the Ocean”.  In the red corner, we have our reigning champion: Butod!  Yes, this beetle larva may look like a small-fry, but don’t be fooled!  I can dodge and weave like nobody’s business, wriggles going down, and is known to have a mean left hook.  But our challenger is no pushover either!  In the blue corner, we have our challenger, Gervase Peterson.  He squared off against Butod during the finals of the Borneo championship, and definitely came off the worse for wear.  Now, 13 years later, Jumpin’ Gervase Peterson is back for revenge!  Will his patented left-right slap be enough to conquer the Butod, or is this just one battle Gervase is not meant to win?

Well, before we get to that, we have some pre-game analysis to look over.  In case it wasn’t obvious, this is a gross food challenge, which I’m ok with, despite being reused.  It’s a challenge that can easily by tailored to the locale, and is just a classic staple of “Survivor”.  That said, I’m overall not a fan of this iteration of the challenge, particularly the final round.  The food is certainly gross, so it earns points in the challenging department, but none of it is very distinctive.  The first round is mealworms, which Vytas, Tyson, Gervase, Monica, Caleb, and Hayden all manage to get down.  I was a bit surprised that Tina didn’t last longer, given her bragging about her suppressed gag reflex on “Survivor The Australian Outback”.  Then again, Tina threw up there as well, so perhaps she’s just overselling herself.  The next round is pig intestine (probably the best of the three rounds), which makes the crime of diffusing the tension of the episode by NOT having Vytas progress (evidently the super gag suppression only lasts for a short stretch of time) and instead having Monica and Gervase (both members of the majority alliance) progress.  Here we get the infamous Butod round, and now comes my displeasure.  For all that pig intestine and mealworms weren’t the most unique food challenge “Survivor” has ever produced, I’ll concede they were at least original to this season.  The Butod, however, I must put my food down on.  I concede that Butod may be indigenous to the area, but my gripe is that it’s a food already done mixed in with new ones.  Consistency is my only desire here, folks.  Furthermore, I get the sneaking suspicion that the final round would have been different had Gervase not made it.  This is just too good to be true, there’s no WAY they didn’t specifically put Butod in the challenge, hoping Gervase would make it.  To be fair, however, it WAS very funny to see Gervase try and eat them, as well as his reaction to them.

Monica, as you might expect, wins immunity, so it seems to be a sure bet that Super Vytas is going home.  All that’s left is to get us our obvious misdirection.  It comes in the form of Hayden actually speaking, specifically with Super Vytas.  Super Vytas uses his powers of deduction to correctly conclude that the majority will split the votes 4-3 with himself and someone else, just to prevent any idol surprises.  Super Vytas, however, begs Hayden to split the vote so that the 4 goes to the other person and not him, promising Hayden and later Tyson that they will have a sub-alliance and his eternal gratitude.  The Hoarder admits to us that he’s got no intention of siding with Super Vytas against his good spot, and Wisecracker seems to be going the same way.  Not that I blame them, Super Vytas’ arguments are not very smart.  Look, I respect that you need to make the jury like you, and that there are no guarantees when it comes to challenges, but Vytas is both a physical and mental threat who needs to be taken down.  Super Vytas then, however, makes the one logical argument, which is that if he goes, the women have majority, which is very bad for Tyson, Caleb, Gervase, and Hayden.  This makes Wisecracker take notice, but I’m still not convinced.  Like I said, Super Vytas is just too much of a threat.

He’s not the only one who wants to help his situation, however.  Despite having immunity, Monica is paranoid.  Ok, the other times I could kind of understand it, but now Monica’s really looking over her shoulder way too much.  It’s bound to make other people distrust her.  I’m usually not one to agree with Laura, but I have to say, for once I’m on her side.  Monica: YOU HAVE IMMUNITY!  I understand wanting to play proactively to keep yourself in the game longer, but this is just going way too far!

Still, if there was any doubt in my mind that Super Vytas was going to get the axe tonight, it was dispelled by Super Vytas’ performance at Tribal Council.  The man who’s the master of subtlety in tight spots, the man who would try and talk his way out of anything, utterly blows his only chance by emphasizing repeatedly how he wants to get revenge for Aras-Man.  This determination and drive makes him too much of a threat to keep around, and pretty much ensures his demise.  Not even a commercial break during Probst’s getting of the votes can make this Tribal Council have any sense of tension.  Predictably, Vytas (his loss demotes him from his superness) leaves, and while I’m a supporter of Tyson’s alliance, and am therefore very happy they made the smart decision, I’m still sorry to see him go.  Save for one or two instances, Vytas played with a lot of class, a great social game, and a pretty decent strategic game.  On top of that, he was fun to watch, and I am officially on the bandwagon for bringing Vytas back at some point, just on his own merits.

Well, that was a short episode, if I do say so myself.  How thoroughly unsatisfying.  No, of course that’s not what happens, it’s a good-old double elimination episode, which I’m happy for if only because it will speed us towards a more interesting strategy.

Not that the last Tribal Council was uneventful, however.  No, Vytas’ comments stung Monica a little too close to home.  Turns out she’s STILL sore about the Brad thing, and wants revenge against Vytas for her husband’s sacrifice.  Accordingly, she switches her vote to Vytas (all the girls were supposed to go Katie), which ultimately makes no difference, but is a very dumb move.  Monica, did you WATCH “Survivor Heroes vs. Villains”?  Did you SEE what happened to Tyson when he did the exact same thing?  Do you understand the OUTRAGE I feel at a dumb move like that?

While Monica may not understand, Gervase certainly does.  He rightly points out that this could have cost any of them the game, had Vytas had the idol, and makes him mistrustful of Monica.  What can I say, good thinking on the part of Gervase, bad thinking on the part of Monica.

Seeing as how nothing interesting could possibly be happening at camp, we head over to Redemption Island, where Aras tries to remain calm, as Vytas blames him for their current predicament.  These is the usual bland sort of interviews we get at Redemption Island, so I am then very thankful that we move quickly on to the great “Cheeseburger Debates”!  The topic this time: “Be it resolved that you are on Redemption Island, and therefore you are out of the game.”  Vytas has drawn the affirmative side, while Aras assumes the negative side.  This has been a debate amongst “Survivor” fans since the inception of Redemption Island.  On the one hand, people on Redemption Island have been voted out, but on the other hand, they’re still influencing the game, so are they really “out”?  To put in my two cents, I personally say their out, if only for my disdain that the Redemption Island twist.  Sure, they still influence the game, but so, to a degree, do jury members.  Still, Aras’ argument that he’s not eating a cheeseburger, and is therefore still in the game, is quite compelling.

Time for another immunity challenge.  Today’s challenge hearkens to us from “Survivor Nicaragua”, specifically the final immunity challenge of that season.  Balancing a sword on a pedestal, castaways will balance coins of various sizes (as dictated by Jeff Probst) on the hilt, making a small tower of coins.  The last one with a standing tower wins.  This one earns my ire less for not being overdone, but I’d still prefer an original challenge, or at least one more epic in scale.  Still, that sword was pretty badass-looking, so I guess this challenge is ok.

Following the token “People falling out comedically early” (Ciera and Monica, in this case), we end up with Katie of all people winning immunity.  Good on her.  Encouragement from her mom probably helped, though I have to say, Tina, given that the alliance wanted Katie out before you, and she’s the only other person on the outside, perhaps it would have been better for you to wish for your daughter to fall.  Oh well, c’est, as they say, la vie.  Cue obvious misdirection of whether or not the alliance will turn on Monica.

And come it does, in spades.  No real need to talk about it, it’s mostly just conversing amongst alliance mates, particularly Gervase (odd, given that of everyone there, I think his name’s come up the LEAST in terms of word of mouth, save for possibly Hayden).  So, what will Tina do to improve her situation?  Yeah, she had a misstep after Aras’ blindside, but she’s still quite the savvy player.  Surely she’ll come up with a great strategy, full of shock and nuance, one that could completely change the game!

She goes idol hunting.  The most hackneyed, overdone, antisocial, rarely effective strategy ever, and THIS is what Tina thinks is the best bet?

The flaws in this plan become obvious when Tyson, Caleb, and Hayden all take it upon themselves to babysit Tina the entire day, thus not allowing her to search for an idol that isn’t even there.  Have to admire Tyson, though, for being so committed to keeping the idol secret (quite rightly, I would say) that he’ll even waste a day babysitting Tina to keep it under wraps.

Paranoia is still rampant in Monica, however, and it’s not unjustified when, after questioning Laura and Tyson about what they’d do if by some chance Tina DOES have the idol, Laura immediately replies “split the vote”.  Of course, there’s no one left outside the alliance who isn’t immune to split the vote with, so Monica of course believes it to be her.  Given that she IS the other target, however, this does little but make me more annoyed at Monica.  The misdirection here is somewhat better than with Vytas, but my money’s still on Tina.

Tina will not go, however, if Probst has anything to say about it.  Seriously, it’s like he hand-picked those questions to set Tina up to make a good argument as to why she should stay, and that Monica’s untrustworthy.  To her credit, Tina steps up to the plate, and gives a MASTERFUL Tribal Council performance.  She manages to promote herself, arouse suspicion about the idol (even if I thought she overplayed it right before voting), and get Monica to make herself look worse.  THIS is where my doubts about the vote start to be raised.

After a fairly funny fake-out from Tina, we see that Probst’s pleas have done nothing, and Tina goes home.  I won’t miss her as much as I’ll miss Vytas, but I’ll still miss her.  While I feel she wasn’t as nice as she was on her previous seasons, and that she had some major gameplay gaffes, I can’t deny that she still had some masterful moments, and I think I came to appreciate her more as a character than I have before.  However, I must be happy that the alliance continues it’s domination, so I’m ready to see Tina leave at the next Redemption Island duel.

Yeah, this was not the best showing for this season.  It wasn’t a BAD episode overall, at least there was nothing cringe-worthy, but it was exceedingly predictable, and nothing of great interest happened.  I didn’t hate it, though, and this episode was good for a lot of jokes on this blog, so points there.  Hopefully next week can be more groundbreaking.

-Matt

Title Credit to Jean Storrs.

Idol Speculation: “Survivor Blood vs. Water” Episode 8: Laura Mor-Ego

We open on a crane shot of a darkened Philippine Island.  All is quiet.  Not even the fauna dare stir.  Galang and Tadhana lie asleep, as snug in their shelters as it is possible to be.  An idyllic scene if ever there was one.

But what’s this?  A section of the night sky, blacker than coal, seems to rippling moving towards the campsites of our castaways!  It creeps in like the shadow that it is, enters the minds of the smartest players, and proceeds to suck out their intelligence.  Yes, the ghost of Kat Eddorson is back, here to take her revenge by making smart strategic players make incredibly stupid moves!

Seriously, though, Tina and Aras, what happened to you?  I may not have found you the most EXCITING winners ever, but you were smart people, and this season was really making me respect your gameplay!  And then you just go and screw it all up, take your positions and do everything possible to undermine them…

Let’s go back to the beginning.

So Super Vytas has a speech to give to his villainous foes (and Katie).  He thanks them, and wants them to know that he’s trustworthy.  So trustworthy.  The most trustworthy person the Gods of trustworthiness ever instilled the trustworthy virtue of trustworthiness in.  Trust him, you can rest assured that he’s trustworthy.  Seriously, though, either Vytas’ persuasive powers aren’t coming across properly on screen, or the women of Galang’s powers of perception are dead, because Vytas just seems to be trying way too hard.  It seems to be working, so I can’t fault him too much, but really, I can’t believe people are buying this.

Then again, maybe it’s not that Vytas is good, but that other people are being IDIOTS!  Tina, yes TINA, the WINNER of “Survivor The Australian Outback”, a person with arguably one of the BEST social games to ever play, makes an INCREDIBLE gaffe.  Her plan is to have Vytas draw in Aras, and have Aras draw in Gervase (and hopefully Tyson) to create a 7-person majority come merge time.  She also decides that, as she’s proven her loyalty and is less of a threat, Monica can take Gervase’s spot at number 5.  Now this is all well and good, Tina’s reasoning is sound overall, and I’d have no problem with her parsing out the pecking order, IF MONICA WASN’T STANDING THREE FEET AWAY FROM HER WHEN SHE SAID IT!  Seriously, Tina, you’re smart, and you just voted out Laura Boneham for almost the same reason!  Have you lost your mind?  Do you not remember how paranoid Monica is, how determined she is to not repeat the mistakes she made on “Survivor One World”?  Clearly, Tina has been replaced with a robot.

Sure enough, Monica hears this, and becomes properly suspicious with her alliance.

Meanwhile, we have the rare sighting of an owl in the Philippines.  We never see it on screen, but I can only assume it’s there, because clearly Laura Boneham was a latent witch who just got her acceptance letter to Hogwarts.  That’s the only reason I can figure for her saying “Ridiculous” over and over.  She must be practicing for Defense Against the Dark Arts.

After that interview segment with Laura B. which went on far too long, we finally head to Redemption Island, where we learn that this duel will be the final one before the merge.  Two people are leaving, winner goes back into the game.  As is fitting for a final challenge, it’s an endurance one, hailing originally from “Survivor Vanuatu”.  Basically, tribe members hug a tall pole with slots cut in the sides.  Last one still on the pole wins.  Simple, clean, and effective.  I love it.  I know it’s rare that I say I love a Redemption Island challenge, but I feel that final challenges are one of the few places where reusing challenge ideas is ok, and I’m a big fan of this particular challenge.  It’s dramatic, it can lend itself to good comedy (remember Yul Kwon’s “Elephants can’t run up trees” lecture during “Survivor Cook Islands”), and is satisfyingly difficult.  My one complaint is that the challenge has a fairly large gender bias, as in all the times it’s been run, the only men to ever win were “Challenge Jesus” (“Survivor Cook Islands”) and Tyson during his stint on “Survivor Tocantins”.  Admittedly, most challenges have a bias in SOME manner, but this one it’s really evident.  Gee, do you think the lightest, smallest person is going to win this challenge?

Still, we get a couple of funny/painful moments before the obvious outcome of Laura Morett winning.  Laura B. slips immediately, but some Probst encouragement gets her back on track.  Probst then reminds us of Candice’s existence by pointing out to John that Candice did this challenge on “Survivor Heroes vs. Villains” (never mind that she did it on “Survivor Cook Islands”.  “The fans didn’t like that season as much, so we’re going to pretend it didn’t exist!”).  Laura M.  remains steady, while Laura B. still does ok, Probst commenting that she’s “like a kid holding on to her mom.”  Wow, Probst, the metaphors have really gone downhill.  Seriously, couldn’t you have said “a sloth to a tree” or something more nature-ish at least?  For shame, your lame metaphoring.

As expected, heavy man John leaves first, while Laura B. slides a bit further down the pole.  Laura M. comments that she’s not going to lose, because her daughter needs her back in the game.  And while it is true that Laura M. has more to fight for in going back into the game (in that she would actually HAVE an ally), Laura, given that your daughter somehow managed to survive despite being in the minority (even if a decent amount of luck was a factor, says I), and you were the first person really voted out of your tribe, I gotta say, I think your daughter needs YOU a lot more than you need her. This is only the first display of egoism we’ll get from Laura M., though at least by the end of the episode, she learns her place.

And what do you know, the smallest, lightest person won the challenge!  I can’t believe the results!  Laura B. was the one of the three I wanted in the most, so I’m kind of sorry to see her go, though if I’m honest with myself, Laura M. provides the most interesting drama.  Though I do have to say, Laura B. was gypped on being made to throw away her buff first when she lasted longer than John.  Speaking of whom, I’m THRILLED he’s gone.  I do feel bad for the guy on one level, since he spent the longest time on Redemption of any of the three left, but he was just so BORING that I am quite glad he’s gone.

So Laura M. is back and tribes have merged.  The color is blue… I think.  It looks blue to me, but I’m not the best with colors, and maybe it’s just that the tv I watch on isn’t the best quality, but it looks almost purple at times.  Still, I’m calling it blue, which while a predictable choice, is one I’m happy with.  Too often, it seems like there’s trends in the color of merge buffs, and we haven’t seen a blue merge buff since “Survivor Samoa” 4 years ago, so it’s a nice change of pace.  What’s NOT nice, however, is that there’s 11 people at the merge.  I gave my thoughts on this in more detail during “Survivor Philippines”, but I don’t like merges of more than 10.  It just feels like too many people for real maneuvering to take place, and 11 is just the worst of the lot, as the number feels really odd.  Still, I have to give credit that at least they’re differentiating it from OTHER Redemption Island seasons, where the merge was always at 12.

Now we have our merge tribe, with the typical merge banter and the typical merge picnic.  Never thought I’d say this, but thank God for Hayden Moss!  He makes it so that the clichéd, overdone part of the merge ends in record time, as he comments on being unsure of how strategy will change, what with Laura back in the game.  This naturally means that we’ve got a scene of Ciera and her mother coming together.  Now, I’m still not a fan of Laura, particularly after this episode, but man am I getting in the Ciera camp after this episode!  She makes the scene not only tolerable, but almost enjoyable, as she smartly brings her mother into the alliance with herself, Hayden, Caleb, Tyson, and Gervase against Aras.  Even though it was Tyson’s idea to go for Aras first, bonus points for making that a selling point, Ciera.  Laura seems the type to hold a grudge, and so any plan to vote out Aras is going to be good in her books.  Further, it increases Ciera’s options, by keeping her safe in the short run, having a safety ally in the long run, and ensures that Ciera most likely isn’t bottom of the pecking order of the alliance.  For all that I don’t like her politics, she’s hiding them quite well, and her newly open strategic side I’m liking.

One small criticism I do have, though, is that Ciera and Laura don’t even seem to consider the possibility of joining the couples alliance.  It’s true, only 3 couples survived to the merge intact, but that makes a total of 6 out of 11, a clear majority.  You also have to imagine that people would be suspicious of couples, looking to get them out first, and so it’s smarter for everyone to stick together in that scenario.  Yes, keeping with the old Tadhana alliance may get you somewhat far, but when that alliance has to eat each other, guess who the first targets are going to be?

Speaking of the couples alliance, we see that Kat ALSO drained the brains of Aras and Vytas, as the pair (strangely allied) gloat about how they’re running things, and how if people were smart, they’d be gunning for them.  I guess this KIND OF makes sense when you consider how good a job Gervase has been doing in convincing Aras that he’s on his side (though given how much time Gervase has spent with Tyson, you’d think Aras would have caught on), but even so, it’s incredibly stupid to get cocky and assume you’ve got the game in the bag.  Good God, Aras, what happened to you?  Hell, Vytas even goes so far as to call the game “Survivor Aras vs. Vytas”.  All those who still believe there’s even a chance that Aras isn’t leaving this episode, exit this blog immediately.

Tyson, ever paranoid, is taking no chances, however, as he pulls Monica into the alliance in a late-night conversation.  I admit this is a smart move, covering all your bases, having a safety ally in case everything goes wrong, and choosing Monica as the odd one out of Tina and Aras’ alliance, but he sullies the moment by commenting on Monica in a way that seems to me both mean-spirited and unfunny.  To be fair, however, Monica is just about as paranoid as he says.

Actually, I’ve been meaning to talk about Monica a bit.  She’s upped her game from “Survivor One World”, I freely admit that, and I’m pleased she’s trying to correct her mistakes.  I think such people make for the best returnees.  However, Monica may be going a bit too far in that direction.  It seems like every episode, Monica is second-guessing something, or flipping the vote on a word.  Now, every time she’s been right to, but that makes her something of a volatile alliance member, and I think in the long run this will damage her chances.

One insurance policy isn’t enough however, as Tyson decides to go idol hunting, remembering Caleb’s comment about a “serpent tree”.  Gee, I wonder is Tyson will find the idol?  It’s not like the “Previously On…” segment made a mention of the idol, thus hinting to us that it would be found!  In all fairness, though, I can’t give Tyson too much credit for finding it, the tree was FREAKING OBVIOUS!  I attributed people not finding the idol to the clues being too generic and cryptic before they got burned, but now I’m thinking it’s just laziness.  Really, I know that the trees look different at the various campsites (speaking of which, I don’t think they specified which camp the merge happened at.  Wonder why.), but you’d think something like THAT TREE would stand out a bit.

So Tyson finds his really bland idol that just looks dumb to me, and wisely decides not to share that information with anyone else at this time.  Good decision, I think, particularly given how paranoid the idol has made people this season.  Also, I think this marks the latest first getting of the idol since it was available pre-merge, beating out Yau-Man’s late time in “Survivor Fiji”.

Evidently, the immunity challenge and Redemption Island challenge were switched, because while I could get behind the Redemption Island challenge, I REALLY don’t like the immunity challenge.  It’s your basic memory game from way back early in “Survivor” history (though this bears the most resemblance to the version from “Survivor Nicaragua”), and while I do admire the challenge team for going a different direction from the usual physical challenge, and I understand that deprivation of food and water does make these things harder, as someone for whom rote memorization is a breeze, I just don’t consider this challenge difficult enough.  Some big visual might help, like maybe instead of a “you miss a symbol” you’re out sort of thing, it’s “whoever gets it right gets to chop another person’s totem” or something, but as is, it’s just not enough for me.  Though we do get a funny moment when Monica can’t even remember TWO SYMBOLS correctly.

Super Vytas and Aras-Man engage in an epic memory contest for superiority (really, are these two aligned, or competing against each other, pick a side!), but as you’d expect, good wins the day!  Super Vytas uses his super intellect to win what’s actually a really cool looking immunity idol.  If nothing else, it’s distinctive.  Must have stolen all the interesting aspects from the hidden immunity idol.

My hopes for a name I can either love or hate are dashed once again, as we head back to camp and find that the tribe is named Kasama.  Things are made even less interesting when Super Vytas gloats about how he technically didn’t NEED immunity, thus ensuring that any dramatic tension for the boot this episode is good and dead.  Still, we need SOME misdirection, and we haven’t heard from Laura in a good long while.  What say she egotistically gets paranoid about Aras having the idol, and tries to split the vote for no reason other than to make herself feel powerful (and because of paranoia caused by being on a season with Russell Hantz).  See why I like Ciera better.

Ladies and gentlemen, we have one of the rarest “Survivor” sights availiable to us right now: GERVASE IS DOING MANUAL LABOR!  Look quickly before Tyson takes it away!  Yeah, Gervase’s interview about the vote was so generic that I really just found the notion that he actually did manual labor much more interesting.

We head off to Tribal, where interesting things may have happened, but I’m too busy focusing on Laura rightly admitting her inferiority to her daughter.  Oh, Happy Day!  Oh, and Aras goes home, what a surprise.

I have to say, this episode felt like a step down for this season in a lot of ways.  The misdirection was really off, and a lot of stupid moves were made.  And yet, I find myself not hating the episode overall.  Maybe it’s because, despite the outcome being obvious, the process by which it came out was intriguing.  Not the best episode of the season, but I give it a pass.

Then again, perhaps it was just overshadowed by the commercials.  I’m normally not a fan of them, but OH MY GOD, THEY’RE FINALLY PUTTING “SURIVIVOR MICRONESIA” OUT ON DVD!  MY FAVORITE SEASON OF ALL IS FINALLY GOING TO BE REWATCHABLE ON SOMETHING BIGGER THAN MY IPOD!  OH HAPPY, HAPPY DAY!

And yes, there is not “Top 5 and Bottom 5” this week.  I considered doing it for hidden immunity idols, and I probably still will this season, as this hidden immunity idol is one of the worst, but I did a list last week, and I suspect the idol will come into play enough for me to talk about it somewhat.

-Matt

Title Credit to Jean Storrs.