“Survivor” Retrospectives: Worlds Apart

As promised, time once again for the return of “Survivor” Retrospectives, but given the season we have to talk about today, can you really blame me for some reluctance here? I mean, we’ve got to talk about “Survivor Worlds Apart”! Look, I try to give each season a fair shake, and this is hardly the worst of the worst, but it’s pretty bad. Still, it may have some redeeming value, so let’s take a moment and look closely for it.

First, though, a reminder for those who have forgotten during the long hiatus, this blog will spoil the season for you if you haven’t seen it already. For those just interested in my generic, spoiler-free opinion, scroll down to the bottom of the page and read the section labeled “Abstract”. Otherwise, if you’re looking for an in-depth look at the season that contains spoilers, read on, as we begin our dissection with probably the most important element of any season…

CAST

Sometimes I struggle a little bit with who exactly is the big name from the cast, but this is not one of those times. If you’ve literally been nicknamed “Amazing”, both by the players and the fanbase, you’ve got to be the big name out of the season. Yes, we have nowhere else to start but Joe “Joey Amazing” Anglim, the jeweler who made pretty much everyone fall in love. Joe was your standard archetype of the young, strong good at challenges guy who was inoffensive and contributed a lot to the survival aspects of the show. Kids loved watching him compete in challenges, and adults loved how much of a breath of fresh air he was when compared to your average cutthroat “Survivor” contestant. Granted, Worlds Apart is not known for being the most cutthroat of seasons, but the need is felt nonetheless. Sadly, I think Joe’s personableness only carries him so far, and while he’s definitely a nice guy, it’s a poor outlook on the season that he’s seen as a major character. Don’t get me wrong, I get why he’s loved, and he’s loved for legitimate reasons. Really, the problem with Joe is not that he isn’t a good character, but a problem with what season he’s on. Worlds Apart is season 30 for the show, and while impressive, the trouble is you start to see the character archetypes over and over again. We’ve seen the type of player Joe is before, most notably in Ozzy Lusth (“Survivor Cook Islands”). Now, a new character in an old archetype can definitely work, but they need to have some aspect of their personality that really sets them apart. Here’s where that “Inoffensive” bit I mentioned earlier comes back to bite Joe in the butt. He’s a nice guy, but nice guys rarely make a big impact, and as a result, Joe does not manage to stand out amongst his challenge-winning brethren.

Almost as big a character, and arguably a much better representative for the season, would be our eventual winner, Mike Holloway. We’ll get into this more in the “Twist” section, but Mike is best known as the winner who won by actually pulling off a complete immunity run. True, he didn’t win EVERY immunity prior to the end, and there was even a gap where he was forced to use a hidden immunity idol. Still, with everyone gunning for him, his strategy was risky, and therefore his streak legendary. Like Joe, Mike was another archetype we’d seen before, in this case the straight-talking simple man. However, Mike brought a crazy edge to the archetype all his own, throwing things at the wall to see what sticks, and oftentimes getting good results despite the odds. This, for me, is what makes Mike entertaining. He’s not a mastermind; he clearly doesn’t have his strategy planned out that far in advance. But he’s willing to try, and dives in with such gusto, and such little regard for the possible drawbacks, that it makes everything fascinating. It helps a lot that not every plan of his succeeds. If it did, then it would imply that his competitors were idiots. Instead, he had a good mix of success and failure, which showed him as an average guy trying to do what he could to win. Thus, Mike ends up being a relatable, but fun, winner to examine.

Sadly, we now must come to a pair that, while not together in any meaningful way during the game, do go together on the grounds of being the main factors that drag this season down. Those two are Dan Foley and Will Sims. These two, I can fairly safely say, embodied no archetype that we had really seen before, but DID do a great job coming off like complete jerks, to put it mildly. Mostly this centered around belittling fellow contestant Shirin Oskooi (whom we’ll discuss later), but they also made off-color jokes, and worst of all, seemed to have no self-awareness about how they came across. It’s one thing to insult people when you just make jokes about everyone, yourself included, it’s another thing entirely when you think you yourself don’t stink. Now, I know what people are going to say: “The producers manipulated them! There were extenuating circumstances!” While that may be true, that does not excuse them doing those actions. And these two make it FAR. They’re not some annoying characters who get a quick comeuppance. Instead, they’re mean to be MAJOR PLAYERS in the season! And that, there, is the crux of the problem.

On a slightly happier note, we have Carolyn “Mama C” Rivera. Carolyn was the older, cutthroat strategic lady of the season, who brought a fun spin to things by appearing to be unamused at most everything. Sometimes she was genuinely unamused, sometimes that’s just the way her face looks. Either way, it made for a fun bit of game. It would be like any time on “Star Trek” where Spock was surrounded by zany antics, and had to remain straight-faced the entire time. It helped a lot as well that Carolyn added more than a bit to the strategy of the season, and for one known for zany antics rather than cold, calculated strategy, it was a breath of fresh air for the strategy fans among us. If it hasn’t been clear, I LOVE Carolyn. Yeah, I was a bit harsh to her in my blogs at the time, but in my defense, I was REALLY not wild about blogging this season, and quick to find criticism. Carolyn may not make the “Survivor” hall of fame any time soon, but for this season, she’s quite a good character I’m happy to have in the annals of this season.

Ooh boy. Rodney Lavoie Jr. has to come up next, and he’s one of the hardest contestants I’ve ever had to judge for this series. Rodney exists to be comic relief, plain and simple. He spouts one-liners, does impressions, and has many a colorful metaphor at hand for virtually any situation. Comedy is very relative, however, and unfortunately, Rodney’s comedy doesn’t really hit home for me. This in and of itself would not be too bad (and, being objective here, a lot of people seemed to really enjoy it, and even I got a chuckle out of his “damn birthday” bits), were it not for the fact that Rodney kept getting in our proverbial faces. Seriously, when we were trying to make sense of this season, Rodney would always show up to knock everything off-kilter, which got frustrating very quickly. On top of this, Rodney also had that annoying habit of thinking he was the greatest thing since sliced bread, and lecturing to the camera about his superiority over his fellow contestants. Again, I can take bad comedy, but have some self-awareness, and don’t be afraid to joke about yourself. So, why is it that I’m conflicted about Rodney? Well, out of the game, he softened a lot. He made jokes about himself, and demonstrated both a humility and a self-awareness that made him retroactively more tolerable. For me, this is a case where the edit REALLY didn’t do a character justice. Out of the game, Rodney is a fairly funny average guy it’d be nice to grab a beer with. In the game, as it was edited for tv, Rodney is an annoying, overconfident distraction who drags further down an already bad season. So, what do I rate, the Rodney I knew at the time, or the Rodney I know post-game (or, at least, claim to know based on interviews and other press)? My only real call is to split the difference, and say that Rodney is not the worst addition to the season, but hardly the main selling point.

That about covers most everyone you’ll hear talked about in this day and age from this season. Some would argue that I should include Hali Ford and Sierra Dawn Thomas in this section, but really, they’re only remembered because they appeared on later season. Granted, Hali had that moment she compared flipping in “Survivor” to the American Revolution, and while a fun moment, one moment does not a character make. As for Sierra… she was tall? Yeah, that’s about all you get out of her this season, so let’s talk about those characters who were big at the time, but have since faded into obscurity.

Top of this list as someone who arguably still gets some play today is our second boot, coconut vendor Vince Sly. Just from that intro, you know he should be someone memorable as one of those wild-and-crazy guys you see on the show every so often. For his part, Vince does a good job in his role. While crazy guy is an easy role to make your own, Vince added a creep factor that made him fascinating to watch. Personal space is really not a concept Vince is good at, and while I’m sure it was much harder to live with, it was a hell of a lot of fun to watch on tv. Additionally, Vince had a lack of self-awareness to add to his fun. I know I’ve said that’s an annoying trait in a character, but Vince’s relatively short time in the game, coupled with him 100% being the butt of the joke here makes it ok. He makes an early alliance with Jenn Brown (oh, we’ll get to her), ostensibly a platonic one, but then becomes OBSESSED about her seeming infatuation with the aforementioned Joe. His exit may have been deserved, but if we were denied this feud for the rest of the game, it really is a shame. I think it really was just that early exit that doomed Mr. Sly to obscurity, even if he is one of the great crazy men of the show.

Following in the footsteps of fun weirdos is Max Dawson, our resident nerd of the season. With his distinctive silhouette (seriously, look at that beard), Max was always going to stand out, but again, how to distinguish himself from the “nerd” archetype? By being incredibly weird of course! Apart from taking his cue from Richard Hatch (“Survivor Borneo”), and walking around naked all of the time, Max seemed to have no understanding of general social niceties, from no knowing when to shut up, to putting his foot in the pot for their drinking water (though I give him a pass on this last point, as he was TOLD to do so by his tribe for a stingray sting). Again, this could easily have been annoying, but with his short time in the game, coupled with his obvious good humor about the whole thing (seriously, the guy is nothing but cheerful the entire time), you can’t help but like Max, even if he is a bit of a helpless goober. Again, I think his relative lack of time in the game kind of doomed him to obscurity, and he certainly wouldn’t be the main draw of any season, but for what he brought, I think he did a good job.

Max’s partner in crime was the aforementioned Shirin, who really I think gets a bum rap these days. Shirin started out just as crazy, if not crazier, than Max. Need I remind you that this was the lady who watched monkey coitus, and then told the rest of her tribe about it in nauseating detail. And initially, Shirin seemed like a less self-aware, less interesting Max. However, what Shirin lacked in initial interest, she made up for in character development. Being spared by Max’s exit, Shirin was able to look at her game and attempt to develop into a much better player. By most metrics, she succeeded. Granted, by the time she did so, she was in the minority alliance, so it was too late to do much of anything, but the effort is there. Sharon upped her social game, talked strategy, and attempted to make big moves. She also gained a lot of sympathy, due to being the target of the aforementioned Dan and Will ire, but then got a great badass moment of denying Will a letter from home as the sole dissent. All this sounds like the making of a fascinating “Survivor” character, so why is she not remembered so much these days? Unfortunately, Shirin would return on the next season, and put simply, would not do so well. For whatever reason, this doomed her in the character department, and makes her forgotten today, which to my mind is a shame. She had a good story, good growth, and I think could be a power player if given another chance.

Now, I’ve been pretty positive on the forgotten players of the season. That ends here with the discussion of our last player in this category, Jenn Brown. Initially, Jenn seemed like a great addition to the cast. Young, athletic, and with a good head on her shoulders, Jenn seemed like a savvy player to root for. And she might have been, IF SHE HAD ANY INTEREST IN PLAYING THE GAME! Oh, but this wasn’t just moral conflict or apathy, no no no! Those might have actually been tolerable. Instead, Jenn had an open disdain for the game, and was not shy about letting other people know about it. This made her preachy and irritating. As fans of the show, we want to see invested people. Anything else is just a waste of a spot. The final nail in the coffin for Jenn is her ultimate (effectively) quit, thus consigning her to the realm of obscurity. For her apathy, good riddance I say!

As to those I think need more love… there really aren’t any. Yeah, I’m normally the first to complain about the fanbase being fickle, but in this case, while some people ended up forgotten despite popularity at the time, and could use more attention, I think the fans were spot-on. Those that deserve to be remembered (for good and for ill) are, and those that aren’t are consigned to obscurity. Good on you, fanbase. That said, the cast for this season still does not hold up well. There are a few good standouts, but in the overall history of “Survivor”, they’re mid-level characters at best. Then, when your discussion of a cast inevitably centered around bulying, you’re not setting a good example, and really dragging your season down.

Score: 3 out of 10.

CHALLENGES

Unlike the cast, I can actually be somewhat positive about the challenges this season. None of them area really the stuff of legend, but here the challenge department started experimenting a little. There weren’t that many repeat challenges this season, which is always a plus, and where we got familiar concepts, we started getting shake-ups to them. A lot of challenges involved choice or some other cerebral aspect in the middle, as opposed to at the end, of the challenge, which makes the challenges stand out in a good way. As I’ll discuss in the “Overall” section, this season had a theme of “Shipwreck”, and they actually did a decent job of incorporating this into challenges. Again, not the stuff of legend, but it helps the season stand out from the competition, which deserves a decent score, at least.

Score: 6 out of 10.

TWISTS

While not immediately apparent from the title of “Worlds Apart”, this season was centered around what’s commonly referred to as the “Collars” twist. This being a three tribe season, the tribes were divided based on their status in life: White Collar, Blue Collar, or No Collar, for those who didn’t fit neatly into either category. With the reusing of locations, I get the need to theme your seasons, but this is the first one that felt really forced. Something like Brains Brawn and Beauty makes sense. It’s a logical division people might subconsciously think about throughout their day. But collars? Yeah, not exactly the most natural of divisions. However, all that could be forgiven if the twist was unobtrusive, and the cast interesting. Sadly, as I’ve discussed, the cast was sub-par, and we seemed unable to go an episode without Probst forcing the idea of “collars” into the discussion somehow. We tried to forget, but he would not allow it. Hence, this section starts out on a low note.

Things don’t get much better with a “leader” twist. Right out of the gate, each team has to pick a leader, who then picks a co-leader. The purpose of these leaders is not immediately apparent, but after arriving at camp, it transpires that these leaders must go off and make a choice: either get more rice for the tribe, or a clue to an idol. And this would be kind of a fascinating twist… FOR ONE PERSON! I get the need to change things up, and a adding a co-leader certainly fulfills that requirement, but it also disincentives making any choice but taking the rice. An idol clue for one person is a big advantage, possibly work screwing the tribe over for. Between two people? Not so much. Sure, So and Joaquin on Masaya (the “White Collar” tribe) did do it regardless, but since both left before the merge, I’m going to say it was not a smart idea.

Moving on to the realm of GOOD ideas, we have our first immunity challenge, which is a primary example of the “choices” I was talking about earlier. At first glimpse, this is your standard “obstacle course with a puzzle at the end” challenge we’ve seen a bunch before, but with some twists. The challenge requires a ladder, which must be freed in one of two ways: either undo a bunch of knots, or unlock three locks. The former is consistent, but takes a decent amount of time. If you’re lucky, the latter might not take much time, but could also take an inordinate amount of time. It’s the latter choice, however, that’s the really great one, in my opinion. Rather than one puzzle, each tribe has a choice of three. Each puzzle has a different number of pieces, but the fewer pieces there are, the more obscure the puzzle gets. For all my kvetching, this is a great way to start off the season, getting us insight into how the teams work together, and spicing up an otherwise bog-standard challenge.

Our first player-induced twist comes with an episode two blindside. This is a Nagarote (the “No Collar” tribe) tribal council, and this tribe had been divided between two threesomes. There was the “Normal” threesome of Joe, Jenn, and Hali, against the “Weird” threesome of Will, Vince, and Nina. This in and of itself makes for an intense Tribal Council, but adding in Vince to the mix only makes things crazier. A split vote plan gave the “weird” threesome a chance to take control, but paranoia about Will’s challenge ability (he’s not the greatest) made him rethink things, leading to the aforementioned blindside of Vince. While definitely a loss, it was a very entertaining Tribal Council.

Not much else happens until the tail end of episode four, when we get a tribe swap. If you think they’re going to do it in a new and interesting way well then, you don’t know modern “Survivor”. Yeah, it’s just randomly done, with the new Nagarote getting screwed in terms of challenge ability, because we’ve never seen a situation like that before! At least they brought interesting dynamics. Unlike the new Escameca, where original tribe members had a clear majority, Nagarote was a 3-3-1 split between the old Masaya and the old Nagarote, with Kelly being caught in the middle as the one. Unsurprisingly, she was courted by both sides, but there was more intrigue than just that. Rather than the sides being solid, Carolyn was sick of dealing with Max and Shirin (who went to the new tribe with her), and thus Max was blindsided. Not the most exciting defeat ever, but better than a normal “Which side will they go to?” question.

Adding further interest, Nagarote overcame their relative weakness to win the next two challenges! Granted, the immunity challenge was thrown by Mike to make sure Kelly stuck around, but still, a fun watch. This culminated in the blindside of Joaquin, in a power grab by Mike. Joaquin was voted out over the more athletic Joe, due to the former developing a relationship with Rodney, which Mike saw as a threat. Again, an intriguing episode, and one that would have consequences down the road. Don’t expect this kind of competence much, though, it’s not coming again.

And so we come to the merge. Now, as merges go, this was decently exciting. Some good inter-alliance play, but really, with Joe around, you knew whatever alliance he was in would be targeted by everyone else, thus putting the former Nagarote (save Will, but including Shirin) on the outs. However a well-timed idol play by Jenn saved her, and ended up eliminating Kelly. Sorry to see her go, since she was a big part of the strategy of the season, but it at least temporarily stopped the season from being predictable. After this, it would be normal vote after normal vote. There would be some drama about Jenn quitting, but since she didn’t, it was mostly just a straight Pagonging of the alliance with the strong guy in it.

I say “mostly” because the auction did come with some excitement this season. First, there was the new twist: Will bought the first mystery item, which turned out to be a big mistake, as said item eliminated him from the auction entirely. He would get a secret stash of food , which does shake up the auction bit, but we’ll talk about that in a minute. More important is what happened with the family letters and advantages at the auction. Carolyn, Dan, and Mike all agreed to pay for the letters from home, keeping them at the same level for the future advantage. Mike, however, went last, and attempted to reneg on the deal. I like the gustiness of this move, and fallout was well deserved. Mike got read the riot act from everyone else, and then made the particularly dumb move on caving in. Now, not only did everyone still hate him, but he had no advantage to show for it. The three had to draw rocks for it, with Dan getting the advantage. While definitely fun from a chaos perspective, it was tinged with the negativity that, as I’ll discuss, so affects this season.

And what was this advantage everyone was bidding on? An unexpected extra vote! Yes, for the first time, one could choose to vote twice at Tribal Council. A decently powerful twist, and one well worth implementing, though I’d say later seasons would do it better. As a prototype, though, it’s all right. Shame it had to go to Dan, though.

So, let’s talk about Will’s secret stash. Correctly realizing that it would be difficult to keep hidden, Will shared the stash with the others. Shirin made the unfounded, but not unreasonable, accusation that Will had hidden some of the stash for himself. If Will had simply argued back this would barely have been worth mentioning. But no, Will instead has to make everything personal. See what I mean about the ugliness of this season? On the plus side, this did lead to a badass moment for Shirin. Will, upset at not getting to bid for his family letter, asked to sit out the immunity challenge for it. Prost agreed, but only on the condition that the rest of the tribe agree as well. Shirin stood up and effectively said no. Not malicious, but a good bit of empowerment.

The Pagonging continues until only Mike is left on the outs. This is where Mike’s streak starts up, beginning with an idol play that blindsides Tyler. Tyler was a good strategist, but never really relevant to the season, so this is not a bad start to Mike’s reign of terror. At this point it’s a downward slope to Mike’s win, but we do get some shake-ups here and there. In the penultimate episode, Dan uses his votes to try and save himself against a possible coup. In response, Carolyn plays her idol, thus causing the very coup that Dan feared. Then there’s the fact that Mike doesn’t just want to win, he wants those he perceives as having betrayed him (Rodney and Sierra) to suffer, manipulating things to make sure they exit the game. This did cause some good alliance shifts, but with such a foregone conclusion, it’s basically one blip of niceness over the course of a boring conclusion.

On paper, Worlds Apart sounds better than it actually is. True, there’s a lot of Pagonging going on, as well as a disdain for actual strategists. However, all that could be forgiven in the cast was pleasant to each other. But they’re not. They just go on being jerks to one another, and it just ruins the otherwise good points of this section. I still stand by those challenge twists, though.

Score: 4 out of 10.

OVERALL

Despite not taking place in the South Pacific, Worlds Apart somehow managed to have the obstacle of “Generic South Pacific Island” going against it. Impressive enough in and of itself, but more impressive is how the season triumphs in its adversity. You see, rather than the plastic look of a lot of more recent seasons, Worlds Apart really went in for the hand-made look. They even got it into the challenges! One particularly memorable one had contestants using machetes as carrying platforms. That’s both clever, and impressive! All this is undone, however, by the merge tribe name. “Merica”? Really? You couldn’t come up with anything better?

Sadly, this is where the praise ends. Worlds Apart was not doomed in concept, but it needed a REALLY strong cast to pull through. What we got was a bunch of idiots who didn’t care about the game looking down on those who do. When your audience is mostly made up of hardcore gamers, this PROBABLY isn’t the look you’re going for. On top of that, everything felt SUPER personal this season. This was a cast unafraid to go on the personal attack, and it really dragged everything down. If that wasn’t there, I could look back on the season with apathy, maybe a little respect. Instead, all I see is disgust, and that’s really the biggest problem of this season.

Score: 14 out of 40.

ABSTRACT

Worlds Apart is just simply an unpleasant season. Maybe if you’re someone who really likes watching interpersonal fights, this season’s for you. Otherwise, stay away. The only thing I could say to recommend this season is that it does get a fair number of returnees, but since they’re all pretty much blank slates, it’s hardly necessary to understand future seasons.

-Matt

Title Credit to Jean Storrs.

Idol Speculation: “Survivor MGX” Episode 9: Will Can’t Have Alcohol

Guys, I have an announcement: Will can’t drink alcohol. No beer, no wine, no spirits, no mixed drinks. Nothing. Zip. Nada. Poor sap has to make do with only soda. And what a sad existence that must be. But let’s focus on the main point here, and that is that Will Wahl is not legally allowed to drink. The man must be abstinent while his tribemates are in the throws of Dionysian bliss. He cannot have a single drop of that sainted liquid that makes one drunk. There will be no imbibing of intoxicating beverages by the young man with the uncannily deep voice. And, just in case I haven’t made it clear, Will cannot drink alcohol.

Ah, what a traditional way to start a blog, talking about the main focus of the episode. Now we move onto the strategy talk, as the usual fallout from Tribal Council ensues, along with the time-honored tradition of calling the people who flipped on you “idiots”. Our culprit tonight is perennial idiot Jay, who brings up the point that Zeke, Adam, and Hannah are now on the bottom of the Gen-X alliance. I’m willing to admit that this point is fair, but on the whole, I can’t condone Jay’s assessment. After all, where would the threesome be if they had stuck with him True, they’d be the bottom of a seven-person alliance rather than a nine-person alliance, which is seemingly better, but I’d argue (and I’d say the later parts of the episode back me up) that the nine-person alliance is more fractious than seven-person alliance in this case, and, as Hannah will bring up later, that threesome have more power in the latter alliance, despite the increased number. Here’s my problem: I can, to a certain degree, excuse people saying “Well, why ISN’T my alliance the obviously right move to make?” before the votes are cast. But hindsight is 20/20, and for Jay to not even RECOGNIZE why his alliance might not be attractive to Hannah, Zeke, and Adam is preposterous.

Chris also takes the time to brag about how his position is improving. Which is true. Good assessment, Chris. Yeah, really not much more to say about it than that.

But enough about that, this is shiny, happy “Survivor” time, as Adam for once manages to not completely screw up consoling someone after the vote, talking with Taylor about why it was the correct move for him to go against Taylor. Namely, Adam points out that Taylor and Jay were gunning for HIM, a point that even Taylor can’t deny, so we quickly move on to talking about the dirt that Taylor and Adam have on each other. Adam knows about Taylor’s food stash, Taylor knows about Adam’s reward steal. This helps to justify Adam’s revealing of information last episode, a move panned by everyone but myself, it seems. Basically, Adam and Taylor are in a “Nuclear Option” situation. Both have information that could, if not destroy each other, then at least cripple each other’s games pretty hard. That is a way to build trust, albeit tenuous trust. And, given how the Cold War went in general, you could argue that the analogy makes for bad strategy, but I still see the point in it. Granted, Adam really needs to give up on this whole “Make Taylor and Jay trust me.” thing, since that ship has clearly sailed, but here, at least, he has one good attempt at it. I’ll give him credit, though: I really like his “If you wanted me to stick with you, why’d you try and vote me out?” confessional.

Taylor consoles himself with food, and his attitude is really starting to annoy me. What Taylor is doing here is effectively sabotage, not really any different from what Scot and Jason did on “Survivor Kaoh Rong”, but at least they were TRYING to piss people off. Taylor really doesn’t seem to understand why it’s wrong, though he does at least admit that he’s doing it more to give himself an advantage than anything. I just keep thinking back to the likes of Julie McGee
from “Survivor San Juan del Sur”. She similarly stole food, and the castigation of her in response was a factor in her eventual quit. Taylor? True, he does get voted out for his trouble, but the man ultimately gets off pretty lightly for what I’d consider a serious offense. Stealing is one thing, but stealing from literal starving people is another thing entirely.

In keeping with our new upbeat attitude, we get our second instance of HANNAH attempting to console someone on the losing side of the vote. Having learned from her mistakes with Adam and Zeke, Hannah actually does a good job of talking to Jay about her decision. She’s friendly, but not condescending, and explains how her feeling of greater power by working with the old Takali led to her flip, and Jay, who really has very little choice at this point, seems to still be on good terms with her. Despite what episode 3 of this season might have indicated, Adam really needs to take lessons from her.

We head on to our reward challenge, and, in what may be an “Idol Speculation” first, I really feel no need to describe it step by step. It’s your average generic obstacle course, and ultimately in this case, the individual steps don’t matter. It’s boring, it’s a team challenge post merge, it’s for burgers and drinks at a spa, and Will still isn’t allowed to drink alcohol. That’s about all that really matters.

Oh, and Probst is making a big deal about the fact that teams will be decided by a schoolyard pick. This is often the case on “Survivor”, but rarely do they actually bother to show it. The only times they DO show it are when it has a major impact on the episode, like when the contestants of “Survivor Kaoh Rong” called out how it would fall down alliance lines, and skipped it entirely. Naturally, with something so impactful on the episode, we’re going to watch the pick go one by one, and see where it all goes wrong for one team.

Or, you know, we could cut right to the fact that the purple team is pretty much all old Takali, while the orange team is all old Vanua, with Taylor and Jessica being the only respective switches, that’s cool too. But surely if they brought up the schoolyard pick, then it must have major repercussions throughout the episode. I mean, the orange team picked by Hannah ultimately loses, so that must do something. Look, she’s even getting a confessional about it! It must lead to something this episode! SPOILER ALERT: This is the last time we hear about the schoolyard pick having any impact.

We get our requisite enjoyment of the reward, with Taylor bragging about his eating habits as a garnish. Then we return to a classic “Survivor” staple: the drunken idiot. Newer fans of the show may not be aware of this, as the tradition has dropped off in recent years, but “Survivor” used to have a mean tendency to give people just enough alcohol and just barely not enough food to have someone make a complete drunken ass of themselves. Think of Tom Westman’s performance during the merge on “Survivor Palau”, or basically any time “Big Tom” Buchanan (“Survivor Africa”) was allowed anywhere near alcohol. Unlike Will. Who can’t have it. Having no one named “Tom” on this season to take the fall, we settle for Bret, who seems to determined to prove all stereotypes about Bostonians true. He even sort of KNOWS he’s being set up, admitting beforehand that he should probably limit himself, though Chris informs us that this went out the window very quickly. Granted, Bret gets off easy, with the extent of his drunken exploits being a bombastic cannonball into the pool.

All is not calm, though, as Sunday comes out of the woodwork to deliver some intrigue. I said back in episode 3 (there’s that episode again) that I thought there was more to Sunday than the show was giving us, given a good remark of hers at Tribal Council. Then she quieted down until recently, and I wrote it off as my reading too much into it. But evidently I was correct the first time, as there’s some gamer left in Sunday yet. A fairly bad gamer, to be sure, but a gamer nonetheless, and that always leads to some fun with regards to strategy. Basically, the wounds from the vote where Jessica was saved haven’t fully healed, and while the pair are civil to each other, Sunday admits that Jessica probably needs to go sooner rather than later, especially as the old Takali a a fractured bunch. I would complain about this coming right out of nowhere, but in this case, I’ll give it a pass. This conflict would only really have arose starting in episode 5, at which point we had the switch, so there was really no need for Sunday to comment on her suspicion of Jessica until now. What I WILL complain about is the poor strategy behind it. I get not trusting Jessica, I really do, but holding the old Takali together is really in Sunday’s best interests in particular. At the moment, the old Vanua are chomping at the bit to get rid of each other. Like or dislike each other, if the old Takali can stick together for the next few votes, they’ve got this in the bag. Keep that majority, and ride it to the end. Granted, that’s not so good if you’re on the bottom of the old Takali, but if anything, Sunday is is the best position of the old Takali. She’s well liked, and so has a chance of winning no matter WHO she’s up against, and while she seems to be firmly in the Chris and Bret camp at this point, she could still potentially swing over to the Jessica, David, and Ken camp. Or, she could let all but one old Vanua go, and then use that old Vanua member along with Chris and Bret to gain a majority and a guaranteed finals spot, where again, she would have a decent chance at winning. Certainly there’s something to be said for making a big move and bolstering your resume, but as this season has demonstrated, one must wait for the proper timing. For Sunday, this is throwing out the baby with the bathwater, to use an old cliche.

But I want to like Sunday! QUICK! Cut to even worse gameplay! Oh, good, Adam is trying to ease tensions with his enemies again, that should be worse. Sure enough, Adam proves to us yet again that he can’t have more than one good soothing moment per episode, and ends up talking with Jay out in the water. Still bitter about the Mari vote, Adam gives him a “How’s it feel to be on the bottom?” talk, and while I do think Jay exaggerates QUITE how much of an asshole Adam is being here, I can’t deny that it’s not really Adam’s smartest play, and he does come off as kind of an ass in this case. Admittedly, Adam is at least not playing both sides of the fence, or at least is being more subtle about it, but the damage on him just keeps getting worse. Again, while making enemies of eventual jurors is a categorically bad thing, in the case of people like Jay and Taylor, it was inevitable due to the Figgy vote. But when Jay goes to complain about Adam to the group, thereby taking the talk away from Will’s sobriety for a minute, Hannah and Zeke join in on what an asshole Adam can be. When your CLOSEST ALLIES don’t like you, your chances of winning are shot. I still personally like Adam. As someone who’s got a naturally loud voice, I can relate to the whole “shouting in confessionals” thing, and I like how focussed he is on pure strategy. Mind you, the latter point is part of his downfall, but I’ll be talking about that when we get to Tribal Council. My point is that I’ve accepted the fact that Adam will not be winning this season. He may make it to the end, but I don’t see him really acquiring the votes necessary to win it all. Enjoyable to watch, but not good for winning.

After a really pretty sunrise, we see that Sunday’s quest is not done, as she goes to Jay about the possibility of using him, Will, and Taylor to blindside Jessica, which Jay agrees to, as he doesn’t have many options at this point. What is interesting to note here, though, is that this is further proof that Hannah, Zeke, and Adam going with the old Takali was the right move. Unlike Jay, Taylor, Will, and Michelle, who were a tight, nigh-unbreakable foursome, the old Takali, while in greater numbers, have difficulty working together. Push comes to shove, they’ll join for a vote, but those old divisions are there, and working in the favor of Adam, Zeke, and Hannah. It’d be one thing if the old Takali was a solid six who COULD be broken up by a good strategist, but this isn’t the doing of Adam, Hannah, or Zeke. The old Takali are doing this to themselves, with little to no outside prompting. Again, more evidence that Jay really is wrong in saying that the move last episode was a bad one.

Our immunity challenge is only slightly more remarkable than the reward challenge. A returning challenge from “Survivor South Pacific”, our tribe members hold a large wooden bow with a ball on top of it, while standing on a balance beam. At specific intervals, contestants will move down to a narrower section of the beam. If they fall off or the ball drops, they’re out. Last one standing wins. Pretty standard difficult endurance challenge. While it is a reused one, it isn’t overdone, and as it’s been five years since we’ve seen it, I’m willing to give it a pass in that regard. What DOES bug me are the bows. Could we put in at least a LITTLE work to make them look authentic. I know we’re kind of in the era of “Plastic ‘Survivor’”, but a little more effort would be appreciated.

Speaking of things from over five years ago, we bring back a twist no seen since “Survivor Redemption Island”, presumably put on hold to distance the show as much as possible from that God-awful season. If people want to, they can opt out of the challenge and eat grilled ham and cheese sandwiches, potato chips, and imbibe some soda and beer. Except for Will. He can’t have the beer. Just thought I’d clarify it.

Once again skipping over the important decision-making part of the challenge, we cut right to finding out that only Zeke and alcohol-free Will opted out, which makes sense, especially when you consider that you’ve got surfer dudes in the challenge, as our little puritan Will points out. I’m actually surprised MORE people didn’t drop out, though I applaud them their dedication to the game.

Normally I’d just skip right to the outcome of the challenge, but I do want to draw attention to one early drop out. Bret is out pretty early on, which is no surprise for a top-heavy guy, but the look of betrayal he gives the food and drink is just priceless. You know he just wanted to drive in the “Drunken Bostonian” stereotype a LITTLE BIT MORE, and instead has to settle for Will getting drunk. Oh, wait, I forgot, Will can’t drink alcohol. I guess Probst mentioning it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE FREAKING CHALLENGE wasn’t enough of a reminder.

Ken ends up winning the challenge, which surprised me somewhat. This is a challenge that doesn’t favor the top-heavy, and as a man’s center of gravity is higher than a woman’s, I’d have expected one of the ladies to take it. Probably Jessica, given her performance in the previous immunity challenge. Granted, Ken is not the most top-heavy looking guy, but the center of gravity thing is still a problem. Frankly, all this means is that the immunity necklace will not impact the ultimate vote.

With talk of potential immunity idols JUST NOW coming up in our majority alliance, they agree to split the vote between Jay and Taylor. Frankly, it’s the smart move. There’s always a chance at a fracture, and splitting the vote makes it easier for the alliance to fracture, but even if two people defected to Jay’s side, making the vote 5-3-4, they’d still be down in numbers come next episode. Ultimately, the idol is a greater threat. Sunday is the only one not on board, due to wanting to use Jay, but she pulls on her big girl panties with Bret and agrees to go along with the smart move. At this point, really the only indicator that either Taylor or Jay ISN’T going home is the fact that David stated that either Taylor or Jay was going home. Usually, that means you’re safe.

As Sunday’s plan never really got off the ground, Jay and Taylor go in for one last smorgasbord before Tribal Council, where Taylor brings up that Nuclear Option he’d been talking about all episode. With Adam’s name being about as low as “General Grievous” with the pair, they agree to bring it up at Tribal Council, as a last-ditch effort to save themselves. Why they don’t bring it up BEFORE Tribal Council, when they’d be more likely to get the plan changed, is a mystery to me. I know we’ve seen plans change last minute at Tribal Council more and more over the recent seasons, but the tried and true method of getting one’s plan in place beforehand is still better.

I could take this time to talk about the good strategic double-talk, including subtle bringing up of the old Takali fractures by the old Takali, but I think our nuclear war takes precedence. While I’ve still little respect for Taylor, if you ARE going to invoke a Nuclear Option at Tribal Council, this is the way to do it. Rather than just spill the beans on Adam and hope for the best, Taylor first confesses his own food-stealing sins to the group (lumping Adam in with him in the process) so that Adam has no ammunition against him, and then tells the group about Adam’s reward steal. Taylor here is banking on the recency effect. True, he did something bad, and I’d argue something objectively worse, but by bringing up Adam second, the focus is more likely to be on Adam rather than him. Taylor also has the advantage of playing offense here. Taylor knows what he’s going to say, while Adam has to react, making his argument much less coherent. Adam, in contrast, comes off as desperately trying to salvage his reputation, admitting to most everything, but denying that he actually ate any of the food Taylor left. To make matters worse, Adam must once again do all this at full volume, making his desperation all the more apparent. All the while, Hannah tries to hide in her shirt from the awkwardness. The particular moment that highlights what makes this discussion so fascinating is Adam’s making the fair point that stealing a reward, particular the loved ones visit (which has been the crux of Taylor’s argument) ultimately doesn’t matter much in the game. Taylor points out that it affects people’s emotions, which are part of the game. Basically, Taylor is making an emotional argument. Objectively, what he did was worse, actively sabotaging a vital part of camp life, while Adam is potentially taking away something nice from something else. Adam, meanwhile, if focussing on the logic of it. In the end, his advantage isn’t much of an advantage, unless used properly, whereas Taylor has already committed an egregious offense. It’s two opposing styles of playing the game, and it’s quite dramatic to see them come to a head.

It also does a good job at highlighting what Adam’s problem in the game is. Adam is a strategist. A pretty good one too, apart from having all the subtlety of a foghorn, by which I of course mean no subtlety at all. But he’s a PURE strategist. And while “Survivor” is a strategy game, Adam seems to completely ignore the emotional aspect of the game, which is his downfall. At the end, if you can’t get people, even your own allies, to like you, you’ve got no chance at winning the game. You need both strategic intelligence and emotional intelligence. Adam has one, but not the other. Fun to watch, but ultimately a losing strategy.

Of course, the same argument could be made in reverse about Taylor, that he plays on all emotion, no logic. And that would be fair. But Taylor’s gone now, so I feel like that point is obvious.

So, what wins out in a battle of emotion vs. logic? Well, as should happen in a game of strategy, logic wins out. Taylor is sent home, which I think is the right move. True, Adam has been pretty well branded as untrustworthy by most everyone left, but he’s also been branded an asshole, making him less likely to get a counter alliance together. Therefore, he can be picked off at any time, or taken to the end as a goat. Conversely, Taylor is a likable challenge threat who could easily slip past the radar and make it to the end, even winning. Plus, I would like to remind you, the man actively sabotaged the tribe. He’s EARNED his exit. And no, I’m not sorry to see him go. Everything out of his mouth was just completely inane, and his “holier than thou” attitude that made him the stereotypical “Millennial” this season wanted just became SO ANNOYING! One could argue that he was good as someone to nag Adam, but given Adam’s current standing in the game, I’d argue that we have plenty of that. Like I said, ultimately the smart move. Our old Takali plus Adam, Zeke, and Hannah alliance has a good thing going. It may need to be shaken up, but it’s too soon.

This was a different episode for this season, and I mean that in a good way. For the first time, by NOT focussing on the “Millennials vs. Gen-X” thing, we got some intriguing debates with the emotion vs. logic thing, and we got to see both sides fracturing, with some good setups for episodes to come. Add onto that an explosive Tribal Council, and the running gag about Will not being allowed to engage in underage drinking, and you’ve got yourself one hell of an episode. So much so that it deserves a…

TOP 5 AND BOTTOM 5

The merge episode is one of the more distinctive parts of the show, and a list of the best and the worst definitely bears talking about. We’re an episode late, I know, but somehow it feels like the right time to get to it. Really not much more to explain than that, so, too the list!

TOP 5

5. “Survivor MGX”: A bit of an obvious choice, given how I praised the last episode, but I think it does stand out as one of the greats over time. Granted, my personal “short list” I drew up wasn’t so short, but this merge just has a lot more little intriguing connections that bolstered it up above some of the other choices. Really, the main thing that hurts it is that this is season 33, and so we’ve seen a lot of these plotlines done before, but this season did it well enough that it earned at least a number 5 spot.

4. “Survivor Cook Islands”: Two things set this merge above others: strategy and misdirection. When people think of the good parts of this season, they mainly think of Ozzy’s challenge dominance and Yul’s strategy. Both are prominently displayed in this merge, particularly Yul’s strategy. This is where we get him persuading Jonathan Penner to flip back over, and it’s just as good as you remember it. And while it was clear from the beginning that the Aitu Four would make a comeback here, the episode actually did a really good job of keeping us in the dark as to who would flip. We got Yul working Penner, but we also got Ozzy and Nate (yes, I’m sure there was a “Nate” on the season) bonding, and a potential flip there. Go back and give it a watch. I guarantee it’s a better episode than you remember.

3. “Survivor South Pacific”: Again, while a bit obvious, we had a really good resolution to a storyline here. Cochran overcoming the bullying of the old Savaii and changing up the entire game was really well built up here, and thanks to the narration of Coach, was really well put-together. Plus, we basically got our setup for the rest of the game, which made things exceptionally interesting.

2. “Survivor The Australian Outback”: Merges with food temptation are always fun, plus we had Jeff Varner get voted out over peanut butter, which is hilarious (except to him, of course). But it’s that dramatic ending that really makes the difference. One vote, from the first episode mind you, deciding the outcome of the course of the game is quite a big finish. Though, it’s not quite as big as our number one spot.

1. “Survivor Borneo”: This is one episode where I can’t disagree with the early season purists. Holding the record for most individuals to receive votes at a single Tribal Council, this could be argued as the true birth of “Survivor” strategy, given that a popular but threatening survivalist ultimately got the axe. Even as someone who was used to threats going at the merge, this still shocked even me. Seeing Gretchen go was just that powerful. And the mystery of strategy vs. emotions, much like with this current episode, made for compelling storytelling that has yet to be beaten.

Honorable Mention: “Survivor All-Stars”: Much like the season as a whole, this merge is a mix of entertaining and painful. We got heated personal discussions, and ultimately the less-likable characters (and Rupert) winning out. What gives it an honorable mention? That look on Lex’s face when Kathy keeps her immunity. That look alone deserves mention. I’m surprised there isn’t a meme of it.

BOTTOM 5

5. “Survivor Tocantins”: Rarely is there a “bad” merge on “Survivor”, and even calling the Tocantins merge “bad” is a bit of disrespect. “Underwhelming” might be a better word. We got some obvious strategizing, and good setup for later on, but no real fireworks to stand out. Plus, due to Joe’s medical evacuation, we were robbed of even having a dramatic vote to tend the episode. That alone is what sinks this merge to the “Bottom 5” list.

4. “Survivor Nicaragua”: If the merge on “Survivor Tocantins” has the sin of being underwhelming, then this one has the sin of being incomprehensible. Alina? The person we’ve seen next to none of is the one who goes home? That’s just not the stuff of legend, and really not what a merge should be.

3. “Survivor Cambodia”: Perhaps a more personal choice, but the sudden attack on Kass this episode was a real turn-off. I won’t say she did NOTHING to deserve the boot (she did piss off majority leader Andrew Savage at the previous Tribal Council after all), but like with “Survivor All-Stars”, the personal attacks, in this case between Kass and Tasha, really just brought the whole thing down. With too many people to be truly comprehensible, and no hilarious Lex-face to compensate, this one just doesn’t stand up in the end.

2. “Survivor Thailand”: While I often complain of the merge happening too early in more recent seasons, I will concede that the merge can happen too late as well. Such is the case here. With the old Chuay Gahn up 5-3, this just became a predictable Pagonging, brought down further by the slimy Brian Heidik winning the reward challenge, and us having to, unfortunately, learn more about his personal life. Gag.

1. “Survivor Guatemala”: Yes, even one of my personal favorite seasons, and one that I feel gets a bad reputation, does have the worst merge. The one real criticism I’ve seen levied against this season, apart from being forgettable, was that the cast was largely made up of assholes. I personally take this as mostly people being butthurt about Stephenie LaGrossa, who was America’s sweetheart after “Survivor Palau” showing her more strategic side, and people being unhappy that she wasn’t as pure and wholesome as they thought. In this episode, though, I can kind of see their point. The majority tribe at the merge usually has some power of the minority, but the second iteration of Nakum REALLY came down hard on the second iteration of Yaxha here. It didn’t help that the (admittedly intriguing) twist of opting out of the challenge for food was introduced her. While a good twist in general, this one served to highlight the tribe division, making non-assholes seem like assholes, and the assholes seem like bigger assholes. Not even a really cool immunity challenge can redeem an episode where most everyone is unlikeable and the bad guys win.

Honorable Mention: “Survivor Worlds Apart”: Really, there’s not a whole lot to hate about this merge. By and large, it’s just kind of standard. In fact, it almost didn’t make either list. Then I remembered that THIS was the season that gave us “Merica” for the merge tribe name. Still don’t know what they were thinking.

Bad merges aside, this episode of the current season was still really good. Those plotlines we saw starting in this episode seem to be growing, so hopefully intrigue will be the order of the day!

Will still can’t drink alcohol.

-Matt

Title Credit to Jean Storrs.

Idol Speculation: “Survivor MGX” Episode 8: Banana Chip Etiquette

I stated last week that while the merge episode of “Survivor” generally proves to be exciting, this one shaped up to be extra exciting. And I was proven right. Nice to have that happen once in a while. But, in fact, my correctness was SURPASSED. Not only did we get the conflicts and potential alliances that were foreshadowed, but we even got NEW conflicts and potential alliances that threw further layers of complexity into what may, in fact, be one of the greatest merge episodes of all time. No, there will not be a “Top 5, Bottom 5” list of merge episodes this week. I have to work first shift tomorrow, so getting to bed early is a priority, but also because we just had one only a couple episodes ago. But rest assured, that list is coming soon.

Post-Tribal Council, things are pretty subdued back at Ikabula. No one’s really upset, save Hannah, and even Jay’s bragging is pretty subdued, basically boiling down to him explaining that he felt Michaela was a challenge threat who needed to be gotten rid of before the merge. And I’ll concede he does have a point. My issue is not him getting rid of Michaela in and of itself. Tight as a foursome can be, it only gets you so far, and you;ll have to turn on each other at some point. Jay’s correct in that Michaela was a threat, both in terms of challenges and in terms of potential likability in future. Scoff though we may at here wearing her heart on her sleeve, that attitude can win votes at Final Tribal Council. My issue is with how soon it happened. As we see this episode, the numbers overall only favor the old Vanua by a small margin, and that can change at any time. Not that Michaela being here instead of Bret would ultimately have made a difference, but it would have given them one more number to work with.

Still, it seems they may have gained Bret as an ally. In what’s pretty much more screentime than he’s had all season, Bret becomes a major commentator about the upcoming merge. He has the generic grateful confessional for his skin being saved, but he brings up good strategy as well. He thinks he can trust Jay somewhat after this Tribal Council, but he also has ties to Chris, so there’s that aspect to consider. And that, in a nutshell, is why tribe swaps generally make for more interesting merges. When tribes remain the same throughout, or don’t stay swapped for very long, then it basically becomes a contest of “Who has the majority come the merge?” Given enough time, a tribe swap can make for more conflicting loyalties, which makes for a more chaotic merge.

Speaking of chaos, we also see one of the DOWNSIDES to voting out Michaela: losing the trust of Hannah. The Triforce really just don’t know how to handle her. One vote they don’t include her until the last second, and the other they don’t include her at all. Unsurprisingly, despite Jay having a good attempt at bringing her back into the fold, Hannah is more than a little upset at this development, and the “Freaks and Geeks” alliance seems reborn. Now, if only there was a merge coming so that might come to fruition…

Oh look, a merge! Yes, in what is sadly now typical “Survivor” style, we get a boat come in and gives the tribe five minutes to gather their things for the rest of the game. This is not necessarily a BAD way to do a merge, but when it gets done pretty much every season, you start to get tired of it. Plus, given how quickly we go through Ikabula and Takali gathering their belongings, we don’t really get a sense of the chaos we deserve from doing it this way. The one notch in Ikabula’s cap is that their merge confessional, courtesy of Bret (as was discussed earlier), is insightful, and somewhat different from your usual merge confessional. Adam, on Takali, gives us a more traditional “Now the game gets serious.” confessional. Look, I still love the guy, and he does get some great moves this episode, but he gets some pretty BAD ones as well, and one thing I can’t give him is original confessionals. Adam just doesn’t seem to have a knack for phrasing things in any way other than your generic confessional. Perhaps it’s the fault of him being a superman, in that he tries to do things as normally seen on the show, but your standouts each season generally aren’t the people giving generic confessionals. They’re the ones with a unique turn of phrase, a drastic departure of a personality. By trying too hard to stand out, in a sense, Adam doesn’t stand out much at all.

But, back to griping about the merge. We’re merging at 13 this time, and I’m not a fan. I get that “Survivor” wants to move away from double or triple Tribal Councils, and make sure that as many exciting people as possible make the merge, but the fact is that a 13 person merge is just too much to really keep track of on a non-returnees season. Even on those type of seasons, I’m a little leery, but at least there we have a better idea of who’s who because we’ve seen them before, and it could be argued that things need to be intensified for a returnees season, the fact remains that it’s just too much to keep track of here, and feels off. I’ve come to accept 12 person merges as a norm these days, but even those I’m not to big on. I prefer even number merges, but I’ll take odd, just make sure it’s 10 people or fewer.

What I can get behind is the new merge tribe name. We never see it made, it just shows up in the byline during confessionals, but it’s awesome. Lately, tribe names have ranged from just kind of ok, such as “Dara” (“Survivor Kaoh Rong”) to awkward like “Merica” (“Survivor Worlds Apart”) to the just plain awful of “#Huyopa” (“Survivor San Juan del Sur”), but this one manages to knock one’s socks off. Meet the new Vinaka tribe. I’m not sure if it’s a native word or not, but frankly I don’t care. It sounds epic, menacing, and seems to express more creativity (in a good way), than most recent tribe names. Part of me wonders if it’s not a combination of old tribe names, as some of the letter combinations seems familiar, but if it is, I can’t for the life of me figure out that combination, so kudos there if that’s the case.

We quickly get to partying, which is Jay and Taylor’s forte, as they rekindle old bonds. Subtlety, however, is NOT their forte, and Bret and Chris are quick to notice, going off and talking about how the old Vanua may be more united than previously thought. However, one could argue the opposite, as Hannah, Zeke, and Adam go off and rekindle their nerd alliance. If anything, the old Takali are far more united than them, and that’s where the conflict comes in, since there’s draws on both sides. Bret and Sunday have a connection with Jay, and Jessica and Ken were debating doing something with Taylor, so there’s connection to the Triforce, but David and Chris have ties with Zeke, and Jessica and Ken could also build on their thing with Adam, so it’s all very loopy and twisty-turny. Yeah, not feeling very creative in my descriptions tonight. Point is, it makes the road map of alliances all the more complex, which makes it harder for the audience to figure out who’s going where, and that’s to be commended. Unpredictability is almost always a good thing on “Survivor”, and when you can add that with interesting strategic discussions, you’ve got yourself an episode for the die-hard fans to eat up.

You’re going to notice a pattern with my commentary on Adam tonight. Every move he makes, I will have an opinion on whether it’s good or bad, and every time, the exact opposite is going to happen. We start with a repeat plotline, where Adam uses the tribe’s distraction over food to go and search for something. He claims it’s a “merge idol”, and admittedly it’s not far out of the realm of possibility for that to happen. However, that’s usually because one or more tribe idols was not found, and we know this season that they all have been found. Thus, Adam’s search seems pointless, and like skipping out on goat-hunting before, seems like it’s a loss of valuable bonding time, especially given his social problems later.

Adam is, however, rewarded for his efforts. Not quite in a “hidden immunity idol” way, but in an advantage way. Tied to the roof of tree mail is a note telling Adam that he can steal a reward from someone after it’s won. For once, an actual “Survivor” first when it’s been promised! And a really good one as well! On the surface, this might seem like a pretty pointless twist. Yeah, it’s better than nothing, but what power does it really have? Well, a lot, depending on how you use it. Say, for example, you’ve got a late-game challenge for an advantage in the next immunity challenge. Then, that would be QUITE the advantage to use. Or, say you don’t want a certain group of people going together on reward. BAM! That group’s broken up. What really makes this interesting is that how powerful it is depends on the skill of the player. Held onto long enough, and used at the right time, it could be incredibly powerful. Used at the wrong time, and you get yourself a nice meal while pissing someone off royally. With the great potential to screw or be screwed, this is a twist I’m hopeful we haven’t seen the last of.

Then, Taylor decides to further throw a wrench in the plans of the Triforce, by actually pissing people off. Oh, don’t worry, I’ll actually have a word of praise for Taylor later, but what he does here is foolish. As with most merges, there is a merge feast. As with most merge feasts, there is too much food to go around. So, you stockpile it for the tribe. But for Taylor, evidently altruism or collective need is not a concept. He squirrels away a lot of the food in a jar, and pulls a Will Sims (“Survivor Worlds Apart”) and keeps it for himself. Amazingly enough, he gets caught by Bret, who isn’t happy, further damaging the potential of any alliance between the old Takali and the Triforce.

Oh, but let us not forget Adam, who makes a move that should work, but doesn’t. Adam once again makes a valiant attempt to mitigate the hate against him for the Figgy vote, by bonding with Taylor. Granted, this could have the obvious downside of getting caught with the food as well, but Adam’s a lot more subtle than Taylor, so he pulls it off well. He then uses mutual food eating to bond with Taylor, basically trying to do what he attempted last episode in consoling Taylor, only he does it better. There’s still an apology in there, but Adam does a better job of playing it cool and trying to explain himself. I’d actually be on board with this move, were it not for the fact that he goes overboard. Trying way too hard to regain Taylor’s trust, Adam reveals his reward steal advantage, which at first seems ok. After all, it’s not a totally overpowered advantage, and sharing information can be a good way to bond. The trouble is that ship has sailed. Granted, Taylor deserves credit here for doing a really good job of playing stupid, and getting Adam to give up information for nothing, but Adam really needed to dial it back. Case in point, Adam takes things too fast with Taylor, and tries to target Will. Now, I get where Adam is coming from here. You want to try and get Taylor to be good with you again, and on your side, if possible, and that involves subtly weakening his alliance. Targeting Jay or Michelle, who have been his inner circle since the beginning, might set off alarms, but Will is a relatively new addition to the alliance, and so Taylor might be more amenable to that prospect. That is, if he were interested in an overt strategic game. A flaw in many superfans, Adam included, is that they tend to think of the game in pure strategy, and that selling things that way is a surefire path to victory. The trouble is, not everyone thinks like that, and will respond poorly. Adam doesn’t seem to realize that Taylor is the type of guy who’s turned off by overt strategy. If you took a long time, and worked it in subtly, you MIGHT be able to sway Taylor, and given his crusade, even that’s a longshot. I get Adam wanting to mitigate the fallout from his blindside, but he needs to take it slow.

Next morning, everyone’s plans get outed. Bret outs Taylor as a food thief, further throwing a wrench in potential alliances, and Taylor outs the targeting of Will to Jay and Will, thus getting Adam’s name thrown out there. Zeke, however, overhears them, and relays that information back to Adam, who’s understandably concerned now. I’d normally fault Jay and Taylor for not doing a simple 360 to make sure they weren’t being overheard, but given that Zeke seemed pretty far away, and the conversation had been going for a while before he approached, I’m willing to let it slide.

Our first immunity challenge, as Probst points out, is an oldie but a goodie, dating all the way back to “Survivor Africa”. Our tribe members stand on a small wooden perch, holding their hands over their head. Their hands a chained to bar, which is attached to a bucket of paint, which will drop when the bar is pulled. Last one standing wins. A simple but tough endurance challenge. I do prefer water to paint, as the latter seems very un-“Survivor”, but adding both hands makes things seem tougher. The real reason for the two-hands aspect, though, is so that people are sure to get paint all over themselves when they fall, which is a funny visual. In single hand iterations, people could pretty well avoid the water/paint, but here, you’ve just got to take it. We don’t get any temptations either, which is also a bummer, and this challenge is overdone, but since it’s been a while, I’ll give it a pass.

As to our individual immunity idol… It’s just kind of ok. A wood necklace with some bones, a shells, and a tiki in the middle. The pointy bits are a plus, but there’s just a lot of empty space, which I tend not to like in immunity idols. Granted, an immunity idol can also be too busy (see the individual immunity idol of “Survivor Worlds Apart” for an example), but in general, less blank space is better. This one is hardly the worst, but I don’t think it stands out overall.

Will gave us a confessional about needing to win before the challenge, so naturally he does. We do get one fun moment in there, though, when Will, Jessica, and Adam all try and act tough, only for Hannah to call them out, and admit to her FACE hurting, in a challenge that in no way involves her face. Hilarious. Also worth noting: Will is the first man to ever win this challenge in any of its forms, so good on him there.

Back at the camp, Adam is naturally upset, especially when his name gets tossed around. There’s dissent, though, as Michelle feels that infighting amongst the old Vanua will only strengthen the old Takali. Not a bad thought, but I have to disagree with Michelle here. Adam is as much not with you as any old Takali, and being willing to sacrifice one of your own might actually endear you to the old Takali more, and help earn a majority. Still, it’s dissension like this that helps make this episode exciting.

Fortunately for Adam, Taylor’s food stealing seems to have sent most of the old Takali into the arms of Hannah, Zeke, and Adam. Unfortunately, we’ve got another “Jefra vs. Tony” debate of “Survivor Cagayan”, as the old Takali can’t decide whether to target Michelle, since she’s unlikely to have an idol, or Taylor, since he’s a challenge threat. Of course, the real best target is Jay, since he has both qualities and an idol, but they’ve no way of knowing the latter point, so I don’t hold this against them. Between those two, it’s pretty well a toss up, but like with the “Jefra vs. Tony” debate, I’d say go with the one less like to get an idol played on them. Make sure you keep those numbers. Plus, in this case, despite Taylor’s physical prowess, I’d argue that Michelle’s smarts make her a bigger threat overall. Most of the group seems on board, but Ken goes all Sarah Lacina on us and tries to gun for the physical threats. This, naturally makes Adam nervous, and in the one categorically bad move of the night, tries to talk to Taylor about saving his butt. Now, I understand Adam’s nervousness. If you can’t get a coalition solid, and you’re on the chopping block, it’s a bit nervous-making. But Adam should know by now that Taylor has been amongst those throwing his name out, and so cannot be trusted. Yet Adam keeps trying. As he himself explains, he’s basically trying too hard to be the mastermind and play both sides of the fence. Which can be a good strategy. If done right. Which it isn’t.

You see, Adam is falling into the Matthew “Sash” Lenahan trap from “Survivor Nicaragua”. Sash was a schemer from the season, good at playing multiple sides of a conflict, and even making impressive comebacks after losing his allies. The trouble was his transparency. Everyone knew he was a schnook, since he didn’t really bother to hide it, and it cost him in the end. Same case with Adam. The dude is smart, and has had his victories, but you need to keep in on the down low. His scheming is such that even his ALLIES start to turn on him. Zeke reads him the riot act in confessional, David gets a bit leery, and Hannah pulls him aside to tell him to calm down. When HANNAH, she of the challenge sit-out panic attack is telling you to chill, then you know you’re doing something wrong. To his credit, Adam does pull back and relax, but the damage is done, as he seems to be the only firm target going into Tribal Council, and potentially a unanimous one. It looks like only his idol can save him now.

Once again, we get a very fun Tribal Council, and this one can be divided into two parts. First up, the food part, in which the hunger of the tribe as a whole and Taylor’s selfish behavior is brought to the forefront. Taylor tries to defend himself by… basically stating that he ate not because he was “hungry” but because his body was crying out “emergency!” So, basically, he was hungry. As pretty much everyone else there says, ALL their bodies are saying that, but Taylor’s the only one to act on it. What we really need is to bring back the Heroes Tribe, so they can explain Banana Etiquette to Taylor.

We then move on to our strategy portion of Tribal Council, which starts out pretty standard, but really heats up, especially when Taylor gets to talking about trust, and no so subtly calls out Adam. Adam’s facial expressions here are priceless, and the back and forth a really good way to round it all off.

Kudos to the editing team here: they really build up a potential idol play. One must also give Adam credit: it took balls to not play that idol. With all that talk and those looks at Tribal Council, I’d have played it. But then, I’d have wasted it. Evidently Hannah, Zeke, Adam, and the old Takali were able to firm up a plan, and Michelle is sent packing. Not their smartest move, since Jay is probably the biggest threat in that alliance, but still better than Taylor overall. While she isn’t the biggest loss, and I’m happy Adam is still around to triumph, fail, be goofy, and have an advantage that can be played in future, Michelle is still something of a loss. For one thing, her exit makes the most gender-lopsided merge yet even more lopsided (it’s now 9-3 in favor of men), but she was also a beacon of some strategy. Not the greatest, but she will be missed. At least she made the jury.

Like I said at the beginning, this is a damn fine merge episode! We get a lot of good convoluted strategy, good character bits, funny confessionals, and great mystery at Tribal Council. Definitely up there with the greatest of all time. Next episode looks to rehash a lot of the points from this one. Will it be the sequel that surpasses the original, or will it be a rehash that sends us reeling?

-Matt

Title credit to Jean Storrs.

Idol Speculation: “Survivor Worlds Apart” Episode 11: Mad With Power

OH MY GOD, THEY’RE GIVING THE FANS THE RIGHT TO CHOOSE THE CAST OF NEXT SEASON! What’s more, they’re making it a “second chances” season, meaning none of the repeat players that we’ve had to put up with over the past several “All-Stars” seasons! Both ideas that fans have been screaming for for years, but now we get them all in one fell swoop! You cannot believe how exciting this is for me! I can hardly SLEEP just thinking about how great an idea this is, and considering all the possible permutations this twist could take on! Oh, and I guess there’s an episode that needs to be blogged, but who cares, it’s a FAN CHOSEN CAST!

Well, with the obligatory ginormous fangasm out of the way, i should apologize for the lateness of this most recent blog. A few school things came up that forced me to not watch the episode for a few days, and I haven’t had the time until now to get around to writing this blog. And it’s a shame, because this isn’t a bad episode by any stretch. The problem is that the twist for next season, revealed at the end of the episode, is so big that it kind of overshadows everything else. Still, this does not mean the episode itself is not worth talking about, so lets see what it gave us.

As you might expect, our first scene of the episode is the fallout from Tyler and Will voting for Sound-Byte Dan in the previous episode. Sound-Byte Dan is understandably pissed off that his alliance turned on him (and that he’s at the bottom of the alliance as a result), but I somehow doubt that Sound-Byte Dan will actually try to proactively IMPROVE his position. Not to say that Tyler handles things much better. He admits to Sound-Byte Dan that he voted for him, explaining that he had no other choice in the matter, as Shirin and Mike were gunning for him, so if Mike played the idol, Tyler needed a backup plan. Now, just from that description, it’s hard to say exactly how Tyler handled things badly. After all, NOT admitting to voting for Sound-Byte Dan would only lead to suspicion, backbiting, and overall dissension amongst the ranks, and Tyler’s justification is a pretty good excuse. My problem is in how Tyler presents this argument. He gets incredibly angry at Sound-Byte Dan, blowing up on him almost as much as Sound-Byte Dan blows up on him. This is not the way to win friends an influence people. Better would have for Tyler to present the same arguments, but in a humble “I’m sorry, I panicked, it won’t happen again.” sort of way. I suppose no harm is done, as Sound-Byte Dan doesn’t seem bitter, but it’s a rare misstep on Tyler’s part. Will basically stymies the argument before it can get to out of hand, but comes up and admits to Sound-Byte Dan how he voted in private, and the two hug it out. Tyler takes most of the heat as a result.

Speaking of Tyler, once this scene is over, we get to discussing who will be going in lieu of Mike this week. After all, his revealing his idol means that everyone knows he’s safe. Sound-Byte Dan may bring up this topic, but it’s Tyler who gives us a target. Tyler, if you’ll recall, found out that Sound-Byte Dan won an extra vote at the auction a few episodes ago, and with the numbers dwindling, Tyler fears it. Certainly justified, but I fear Tyler may be a little too gung-ho on the “Vote off Sound-Byte Dan” strategy. After all, if those two votes are on your side, you’re in a much better position. Plus, Sound-Byte Dan=Great jury goat. Just saying.

Day 30 dawns, and as Rodney does not fail to remind us, it’s his birthday. Everyone gives him birthday wishes, and swear they’ll take him on the reward, if possible. Everyone except Mike and Sierra, because they don’t like him. Do I even have to go into why this is a bad idea? Making deals about rewards is one of the worst things you can do on this show. You’re limiting yourself strategically if you follow through on the deal, and if you don’t follow through, you look like a jackass in from of the tribe. Kind of a lose-lose situation, unless the person you agree to take (or give up reward for) is someone you want to strategize with. Rodney is not that person for anybody. Therefore, bad idea. On the subject of Rodney’s complaining about never going on a reward, I’m a bit torn. On the one hand, I can understand the attitude. Being stuck in the same place day after day can get a bit grating, and as most “Survivor” contestants are selected to have a love of winning, it can’t be easy. On the other hand, it comes across to me as whining. You’re not out there to win rewards, you’re out there to win the game as a whole. Suck up the bad an deal with it.

Sure enough, a reward challenge for a lot of dickish potential appears. A combination of several past challenges, tribe members are divided into two teams of three (with one person being left out with no shot at reward) who must unwind themselves from a maypole, assemble a ladder to retrieve a bag of balls, then make their way through a tight net crawl to a catapult-like device, where they attempt to launch five balls into five targets. First team to hit all the targets get the alternate-season requisite “Givings supplies to the needy of the country” reward, and also barbecue. Not a bad reward, and as I say, it’s always good to give back to the host country where possible. I don’t have that much issue with the challenge either, but it’s kind of underwhelming. As I said, it’s a combination of challenges from past seasons (the maypole is from “Survivor South Pacific”, the catapulting of balls at targets originated on “Survivor Redemption Island”, and the ladder comes from time immemorial), but fairly original combinations. The maypole, while looking silly, and being simplified from its original version (the one on “Survivor South Pacific” had everyone moving at once, while this one stuck with one person moving at a time), is fairly tricky, and not an overused challenge mechanic. The ladder is standard, but I like that the rungs must be assembled off-kilter, so that not everything is horizontal. Sadly, the last part of the challenge is pretty standard, and like I said, while not a BAD challenge, it just doesn’t stand out. Plus, ENOUGH ALREADY WITH THE POST-MERGE TEAM CHALLENGES!

The red team has Mike, Sierra, and Carolyn, while the blue team has Rodney, Dan, and Tyler, with Will unsurprisingly not getting chosen. A pretty even match, and it’s actually something of a back-and-forth challenge. The red team takes an early lead, largely due to some blunders by Rodney, but they catch up on the ball-catapulting part. Mike insists on doing the whole thing himself, and while not bad at it per se, he’s not the best. I think I’m getting what Sound-Byte Dan was saying previously about Mike being a showboater. Sierra asks to go in at one point, but Mike insists on doing it all himself. An odd attitude, and one that’s not very conducive to winning the game. While I get that Mike may feel like an outcast after his alliance gets decimated, trying to do everything by yourself, particularly when it lets the other team catch up, is not conducive to winning friends and influencing people. Indeed, if Sound-Byte Dan is to be believed, then it’s actually hurting Mike’s game a great deal. Dude, it’s not the end of the world if you let other people do the challenge.

Unlike last episode, it seems that Mike’s insistence on doing the challenge himself actually pays off, as he pulls out a narrow victory for the red team. Rodney, still having not gone on a reward, is downtrodden, particularly when Carolyn goes back on her word and does not give up her spot to Rodney, saying that she really wants this experience. Yeah, Carolyn, you still come off pretty dickish in that scenario. I get that you could technically say that Carolyn only promised to TAKE Rodney on the reward, and not to give it up to him, but it amounts to the same thing, and rodent’s pissed, so I see no difference.

The reward is pretty standard for the giving back to the community reward. Lots of touching moments with he kids, lots of “life changing experience” interviews. All nice stuff, but all stuff we’ve seen before. Plus, Woo from “Survivor Cagayan” giving kids a karate demonstration is a hard act to follow. Normally on these rewards, I complain that the show only gives sports equipment, rather than useful items, but this one had a nice mix. What I WILL complain about is the fact that the buildings seen in the background, presumably the campus of the orphanage that is the recipient of this season’s largesse, looked pretty run-down. I get that building stuff doesn’t make for good tv, but couldn’t you maybe, I don’t know, REPAIR those buildings? I think that might go a long way towards helping the orphaned kids, more so than the requisite sports equipment (though the new clothes and school supplies are nice).

Just a disclaimer here: do not take my criticism of what was done as being disparaging towards the idea of a reward that gives back. I have said in the past and will say in the future that this is a very good thing for the show to do, and whether it’s the most beneficial or not, it’s nice to see a show that doesn’t just come in, exploit a country for shooting purposes, and leave.

Back at the camp, Rodney does what he does best: complain! Sure enough, Carolyn is the recipient of most of it, as Rodney considers her to have gone back on her word about the reward. Yeah, Carolyn, promising to take Rodney on the reward was a GREAT idea! Fortunately, Rodney’s complaining quickly morphs into another Rodney staple: stupidity, though at least this time it’s semi-entertaining stupidity. Rodney gives us the advertised “I want to be voted off” spiel, and sure enough, it was false advertising. Contrary to my wish that Rodney leave this game, it is instead a “clever” ploy to lull Mike into a false sense of security, thereby meaning he won’t play the idol, and will get voted out. This is a horrible plan with little chance of working. I don’t think Tony Vlachos (“Survivor Cagayan”) could have pulled it off, and he’s the MASTER of making ludicrous plans somehow work. Tyler and even Sound-Byte Dan are skeptical of this plan, as they also realize how unlikely it is to work. Add onto that the fact that you run the risk of people taking you at your word and making you leave early (as happened to Zane on “Survivor Philippines”), and you’ve got an all-around bad idea. Sure enough, when Mike gets back to camp, Rodney tries to plan, and Mike out-and-out states that he doesn’t believe it. So, mildly entertaining though it was, it was also disappointing, and as it amounted to nothing, you could say this scene was entirely pointless.

We quickly move to our immunity challenge, and oh, boy, do I have a bone to pick with it. It’s the “lean back over the water” challenge that originated in “Survivor Nicaragua”, and has since been used so much that I’m sick of it. Don’t get me wrong, it’s a tough challenge, but it’s rarely that cool to look at, and I’m just tired of seeing it.

As this challenge favors the skinny yet strong, Carolyn wins, and we set about our debate for the evening. As Mike did not fall for Rodney’s stupid plan, we’re back to the original target of Sound-Byte Dan. Mike, however, has other ideas, and tries to convince people to vote out Tyler, due to his being a major threat. Tyler, due to not being a moron, realizes this, and campaigns equally hard for it to be Sound-Byte Dan, on the basis of his advantage. The plan is for four of Rodney’s alliance to go for Mike (to ensure he plays his idol), while two (Carolyn and Sierra) vote for Sound-Byte Dan as a backup. Carolyn admits, actually pretty convincingly, that she’s torn, but I don’t see why. Normally, in a group of six, I’d say jettisoning a loyal ally is a bad idea, but in this case, keeping Sound-Byte Dan around is a good idea. Tyler’s a major jury threat, so he needs to go at some point for Carolyn’s game to succeed, and while I would normally say it’s still a little early, when it’s between him and Sound-Byte Dan, you keep Sound-Byte Dan. Granted, as a viewer I’m not HAPPY with this choice, but to win at the end, you need people you can beat. Carolyn cannot necessarily beat Tyler. She can definitely beat Sound-Byte Dan. No brainer.

For the high stakes it has, Tribal Council is quite the jovial affair, with everyone joking around, and no real strategic talk happening. The misdirection remains as good as ever, though. In the end, Carolyn and Sierra make the right choice, siding with Mike to get off Tyler. This endears them to Mike (another option for getting to the final 3), and also eliminates a jury threat in the game. Good for them. I’d say that going to the end with Mike should not be their FIRST choice, as Mike is also a major jury threat, but you got rid of his idol, and gave yourselves more options. I really have a hard time finding fault with this move.

With that said, as a viewer I’m sorry to see Tyler go. He was a low-key player, and so not the most interesting, but he wasn’t an awful person (like so many people on this season have been), was a pretty decent strategist, and likable enough in his own way. Somewhat to my surprise, I hope he comes back, and he makes a fine addition to the jury.

This episode was not the best ever, due to sagging in the middle, but it started and ended well, with some good strategy and an exciting climax. But let’s face it, the show is overshadowed by the twist for next season!

In case my opening paragraph in which I abused the exclamation mark key didn’t make it clear, I am THRILLED that the fans get to choose the cast of an All-Stars type of season. We love to speculate about these things, and we’re the ones who keep the show going. It is fitting that, every once in a while, we are thrown a bone and allowed some creative control on the show. I wouldn’t want them to do this often, as even I admit that fans of the show do not always know best, but I’m thrilled to get it here. While I’m not a fan of ballot-box stuffing, I’m going to vote every day, just to do everything to get my favorites on the show. I’m also happy with the limitations set on the show. I always prefer having no winners on an All-Stars season, as it just seems more fair, and I like having people who’ve only been seen once. It gives the underrated players a chance to shine, and helps prevent audience fatigue. I know I ranted in the past about the overuse of returning castaways, but bear in mind, such seasons are exiting, and as we saw with “Survivor Philippines” and “Survivor Blood vs. Water” if the editing and the casting is done right, such seasons can still be excellent seasons. On top of this, while I think we COULD have had a longer break of non-returnee season, after three seasons in a row of entirely original casts, I think they’ve earned an all-returnee cast. After all, the same length of time passed between “Survivor Micronesia” and “Survivor Heroes vs. Villains”, and no one complained about that. Plus, the people they’ve chosen have great diversity in season range. True, there are more people from the recent seasons than the earliest seasons, but I think it’s a good compromise between catering to old fans and new fans. Enough recent faces there for the newer fans to feel like they have a say, but enough older faces to keep the long-term fans involved. Though really, could you find NO ONE from “Survivor Guatemala” to put on the ballot? Why do you insist on ignoring this season, CBS, it was a good one!

Now with that said, I do have one or two issues with how this is being done. Again, I’m a fan of the twist overall, these are just some nitpicks that I as a “Survivor” fanboy have. First off, the inclusion of Mike and Carolyn from this season as options to vote back in. Bear in mind that winners are not allowed on this season, yet Mike and Carolyn are still in the game, and are arguably the two most likely winners. Putting them on the ballot, therefore, seems like kind of a spoiler, as many people have pointed out. Now, Jeff Probst has answered this, saying that they could still win, and if so, they will be removed from eligibility, votes for them no longer counting. This is all well and good, except that I don’t like the idea that my vote might go to waste. True, I’ve got other people I can vote for if I’m worried about that, but it bothers me that votes can go to someone for whom it may not matter, when there are other deserving people who could have had those slots instead (say, people from “Survivor Guatemala”?). Hell, Tyler was voted off this past episode, put HIM on the ballot, I’d LOVE to vote for him. I get that you want to put exciting characters in the game, and Mike and Carolyn are arguably the two biggest characters to come out of this season, but I would argue that, unless you know the show is wrapping up, you’re going to have more seasons, and can easily put them on such a season. Save your cards, is all I’m saying. My other major complaint is that CBS makes you vote for a full roster of 10 people of each gender, before allowing you to submit your votes. While I stand behind my claim that they’ve got a pretty good variety of people to vote for, I have a hard time saying I WANT to vote for 10 people. There’s about 8 on each side that I like, but I’m mostly neutral about the rest, and furious about a few (Stephanie from “Survivor Redemption Island”? Brad Culpepper from “Survivor Blood vs. Water”? This is REALLY the best you can do?). I don’t mind giving my votes to some of the neutral choices I prefer, but I don’t see why I should have to vote for all 10. I could see CAPPING a person at voting for 10 people, but I feel like, if I only want to vote for 8 people per roster, I should be allowed to only vote for 8 people per roster. I probably shouldn’t be too mad at this, but it just seems like a pointless restriction.

One other thing that I can’t really say I have a problem with, as it’s logical as to why they did this, but that bothers me, is the set choices we have in voting for people. As I’ve said, I think the crew did a really good job getting a wide variety of choices for this “Second Chances” season, but I kind of wish fans had been allowed to suggest who they wanted put in the 32 choices before being allowed to vote for those choices. I get why they didn’t do it: with contestants numbering in the hundreds, even with the aforementioned restrictions, write-in votes would not be efficient. Plus, there’s the availability factor to work with. Still, I wish there was a way to write in votes. I get why they’re not doing it, and like I said, I don’t have a real problem with the variety (other than dissing “Survivor Guatemala”), just a bit of wishful thinking on my part.

Speaking of wishful thinking, this season hasn’t had enough lists, and this new twist has got me more excited than pretty much anything else this season. Therefore it’s time for…

TOP FIVE AND… TOP 5?

Yes, the return of the old feature. As you might expect from my fangasm, coupled with wishing for write-in ballots, I’m going to be listing the top five previous contestants I wish we were able to vote for. It seems kind of mean and redundant to list the bottom five people (as it’s either awful people I never want to see again, and don’t need to talk about, or people on the ballots who I wish weren’t, and I plan to have a separate list for them once the reveal of the cast comes at the finale), so instead, I’ll be doing two top 5 lists, one for each gender. I’ll be holding myself to the standards of the other contestants, meaning no winners and nobody who’s already been back. With the parameters set, let’s dive in with:

TOP 5 MEN!

5. Hayden Moss (“Survivor Blood vs. Water”): I’m a bit remiss to put Hayden on this list, as for the most part, he was just a “generic good guy” on his season. However, I personally still remember him fondly, particularly as he had a few (ignored) strategic nuggets. Basically, I feel that he was just starting to blossom it a really good character, almost reminiscent of Malcolm Freberg (“Survivor Philippines”). Given that the mission statement of this “Second Chances” season is “People just shy of doing well”, I feel Hayden fits that bill, and really ought to have been a choice for this season. Certainly I’d rather see him again than Joe from this season, who IS on the ballot.

4. Ian Rosenberger (“Survivor Palau”): I’m aware that “Survivor Palau” is often an overrepresented season, but we’ve had three of the big four characters back from it (Stephenie LaGrossa, Bobby Jon Drinkard, and Tom Westman), so why not complete the circle? While I was never the biggest fan of Ian, he was popular in his day, so why not appeal to the fans by making that choice. Plus, the kid wasn’t bad strategically, just stuck on something of an anti-strategy season, and with too much guilt to make the moves necessary to win. With those guilt factors removed, I’d be intrigued to see how he’d do.
3. Judd Sergeant (“Survivor Guatemala”): I am bound and determined to get “Survivor Guatemala” the respect it deserves! Judd is certainly one of the more underrated characters of this season, and I really wish he was a choice. Though not always pleasant to watch, Judd caused a lot of waves on this season, and actually had an ok strategy. And even speaking as someone who much prefers a logical, strategic game to one focussed on big personalities, even I admit you need some of said big personalities to bust things up. Judd fits this bill quite well, and I wish he was an option.

2. Marty Piombo (“Survivor Nicaragua”): A lot of people dismiss “Survivor Nicaragua” as a season due to the number of unpleasant elements it had (specifically Na’Onka Mixon and “Purple Kelly” Shinn), but they ignore the good elements the season had. Marty is one of those elements. Almost a precursor to Tony Vlachos’ run on “Survivor Cagayan”, Marty brought a combination of strategy and a willingness to try anything to get ahead. Remember his “Chessmaster” lie to Fabio? Priceless! Stupid, perhaps, but priceless. I feel like he could have learned from his mistakes in the interim, and would actually make a really great strategic player if brought back. This, plus the entertainment value, is what we’re missing out on by not having Marty as an option in the vote.

Ken Hoang (“Survivor Gabon”): Another underrated player from an underrated season. Seeing Ken blossom as a strategist was a joy to watch, and made for a lot of unpredictable votes. Both qualities I would LOVE to see on ANY season of “Survivor”. I think Ken could do really well, and I still really don’t understand why he’s never been considered to be brought back.

Honorable Mention: Rafe Judkins (“Survivor Guatemala”): My personal choice for who I would bring back from “Survivor Guatemala”, Rafe does not make the list proper not because I don’t want him but because I suspect he would be unavailiable, but to his current work on ABC’s “Marvel’s Agents of SHIELD” (an excellent televison show, by the way). As such, he’s not really a viable choice, but I wish he was! A good combination of entertainment value and strategy, Rafe’s quirky yet awkward charm made him the stand-out player of the season, and I doubt that entertainment would diminish if he was brought back. Plus, he might actually get to carry out his strategic plans this time.

TOP 5 WOMEN!

5. Kourtney Moon (“Survivor One World”): “Survivor One World” is one of those seasons I prefer not to think about too much (Kim Spradlin’s awesomeness means I don’t want to forget it entirely), but if people must get another chance from this season, I think Kourtney is deserving. She was an ok character, in the time we saw her, but didn’t bring much, which is part of why she’s so low on the list. However, being a medieval on the first day, never really getting to play the game, I think is a raw deal, and so I really want her to get a chance to play the game properly. Now, due to her medieval and first boot status, I feel there are other themed “returning contestants” seasons that she would also be suited for, which is part of why I’m not too cut up at her absence, and why I let her be so low on the list, at least in part. Still, I am a Kourtney fan, and wouldn’t mind giving her my vote in this poll.

4. Kelly Goldsmith (“Survivor Africa”): While I applaud the inclusion of Teresa “T-Bird” Cooper from this season in the poll, and while I’m voting for her all the way, I feel like Kelly might have been a slightly better choice. She had more strategy and a caustic wit that would make her an entertaining watch, and while we can’t have Lex van den Berghe (“Survivor Africa”) as an option due to his appearance on “Survivor All-Stars”, I’m sure Kelly would find another entertaining scapegoat, and we could all enjoy her reign of rage.

3. Lydia Morales (“Survivor Guatemala”): I hear that a lot of people weren’t a fan of Lydia on her season, kind of seeing her as Sandra Diaz-Twine (“Survivor Pearl Islands”) lite, but I liked her. She was an older contestant with an upbeat attitude, and actually a fairly sly player. You don’t see the former qualities a lot, and as Lydia represents them well, I’d like to see her come back. Plus, you know, another contestant for me to push “Survivor Guatemala” back to the forefront of everyone’s minds.

2. Helen Glover (“Survivor Thailand”): Even though I don’t like “Survivor Thailand” nearly as much as I like “Survivor Guatemala”, Helen I feel is similar to Lydia: a person not a lot of people liked, but whom I admired. Another tough older lady (notice a pattern here?), Helen could cut it with the best of them, and it would be cool to see if she had developed strategically in the intervening years. On top of that, I’d like to see “Survivor Thailand” get a little bit more representation, so I wish I could vote for Helen.

Deena Bennett (“Survivor The Amazon”): Basically a Helen that people liked a lot more, Deena was SLIGHTLY more personable, had a lot more wit, and was actually pretty good strategically. True, she got blindsided by Rob Cesternino on her season, but that doesn’t mean she was bad. Put her on a season that doesn’t have Rob on it, and I think she could be a stand-out player with a great chance to win it all!

Honorable Mention: Kim Powers (“Survivor Africa”): Kim doesn’t make the list proper partly because I want the list proper to only have one person per season, and partly because I’ve heard she doesn’t want to do it again. Nevertheless, Kim was a cute, endearing contestant that was a lot tougher than the usual “hot chick in bikini” that “Survivor” casts. If we have to have one, I kind of wish it had been Kim. Plus, again a long time since we’ve seen her, so it’d be cool to see how she adapts to the new game.

So there you have it: a great twist that I can’t wait to exploit the hell out of! Oh, and a decent episode, I guess.

-Matt
Title Credit to Jean Storrs.

Idol Speculation: “Survivor Worlds Apart” Episode 10: Willie Won’t Say “Sorry”

Oh Will. Two little words could save us an episode of grief. Instead, your refusal to apologize has given us a small irritant in possibly the most forgettable episode of the season. Ok, the conclusion’s pretty damn awesome, but other than that, compared with the rest of the season, this episode just falls short. Fortunately, this should make for a shorter blog, so let’s just jump right in.

The morning after last episode, we see the main problem: we’re still talking about Will’s blow-up on Shirin. Look, I’m the first to admit that I side with Shirin on this. I think she’s entirely justified in her rage at Will, and in her frustration at her tribe’s refusal to acknowledge the wrongness of his actions. I also think Will is a pile of scum for going that personal with regards to the game. But with that said, I’m tired of watching this argument. It was covered very thoroughly in the last episode, is a little bit unpleasant to watch, and so I’m just ready to move on. Granted, this problem cannot be a justification for Shirin just “getting over it” (seemingly the only solution at this point), but still, I’m tired of watching it.

Shirin voices her feelings to Sound-Byte Dan, after Sound-Byte Dan establishes that he and Sierra are still 100% on board with the Rodney alliance. Sound-Byte Dan expresses what appears to be genuine sympathy for Shirin, having been touched by her Tribal Council story, and for a moment, you begin to consider the possibility that Sound-Byte Dan might actually have a soul. Of course, Sound-Byte Dan then immediately rails on about how hypocritical and annoying Shirin is, disproving that hypothesis right then and there. I won’t take the mickey out of Sound-Byte Dan like I did Will, if only because Sound-Byte Dan actually keeps his trash talk confined to in-game actions, which are fair game, I would say. Still, right after “apologizing” to Shiring, it comes across as really poor taste on Sound-Byte Dan’s part.

Evidently sensing that a retreaded plotline need not be followed, we cut right to the reward challenge. For this challenge, two teams of four (team reward challenges AGAIN?!) must make their way from one end of a beach to the other. The catch is that they have four barrels and two planks, and must make their way to the other end without either a body part or a plank touching the sand. This challenge is recognizable as being from Gym Classes worldwide (for the record, the team I was on when we had this particular assignment in Gym won), and it’s not a bad idea overall. Yeah, it was first used in “Survivor Nicaragua”, so it is technically derivative, but we haven’t seen it in a while. Really, my only complaint is that I wish they had a wider variety of materials to work with. Barrels and planks are fine, but I feel like with more materials, things could have gotten more creative. Winner gets burgers and fries on a yacht, so that’s pretty well worth playing for.

The blue team consists of Mike, Rodney, Sierra, and Shirin, while the red team consists of Dan, Will, Carolyn, and Tyler. You’d think at the outset that the blue team would be the clear winner, but for some insane reason, they decide to lie their barrels on the rounded parts, rather than the flat ones, which naturally is less stable and unsustainable. Mike’s strength in rolling the barrels gives them an early lead, but he can’t keep it up, and eventually it all comes crashing down. The slow and steady strategy of the red team (who actually put the barrels on the flat part) wins the day. Good for them.

Not much goes on back at the camp. People console themselves about the loss by killing a chicken (seems to be a pattern this season). Rodney whines that he hasn’t gotten a reward yet, while I proceed to play the world’s tiniest violin. People try to pin the blame for the loss on Mike wanting to be a hero, when actually it was all their boneheaded idea for putting the barrels on the less-stable side. Sierra tries to strategize with Rodney about voting off Tyler… Wait, that last one sounded actually interesting!

Yes, amidst the whining in the face of the loss, there’s actually a bit of strategy going on. Sierra discusses the possibility of cannibalizing Tyler, as he’s a smart challenge threat. Rodney pretty well ignores her, claiming that he wants him off, but wants to wait until the untrustworthy Shirin is gone, along with challenge threat Mike. We in the audience know that Rodney actually just wants to keep his core 4 solid, but he does a pretty good job selling the idea to Sierra. Still, not a bad strategy on Sierra’s part. Tyler is a big threat, getting rid of him breaks up the core 4, and gives her some big moves to her name. It’s pretty well thought-out, even if Sierra does not understand its full implications. The flaw with Sierra, as has been true this entire season, is that while she comes up with good moves, she does not wish to execute them. Case in point, Sierra should be able to figure out that she’s probably on or near the bottom of Rodney’s alliance, and ought to consider flipping to take out Tyler and force Rodney into giving her a better spot. Instead, she takes Rodney at his word (though she does complain that he “doesn’t want to strategize) and puts the Tyler idea on the backburner. Sigh.

Meanwhile on the yacht, spirits are high, but the gameplay doesn’t stop. Tyler takes this time to pretty expertly whisper sweet nothings in the ear of Sound-Byte Dan, assuring him that his spot in the top six is assured. Privately, Tyler admits that Sound-Byte Dan is a good ally, as he doesn’t look to get farther than the final six. I have to admit, while I’ve never been on the Tyler bandwagon before now, this interview really makes me like him. It shows that, despite the subtle gameplay, Tyler is thinking on a level we could only guess at previously. It’s nice to see, and gives me someone to root for. Perhaps I underestimated him.

Sadly, this yacht scene also exemplifies what makes this season great, and also what makes it awful. In order to sway Sound-Byte Dan, they talk about how much Mike grandstands, and how he never stops playing the game. What this shows is that this particular season has evolved to favor not those who have strategic prowess, but have social prowess. Let’s face it, Will and Sound-Byte Dan are being dragged along as easy vote cannon fodder. In every other case, it’s been those who don’t make waves socially that last the longest (Rodney I consider to have recovered from his early blunders at this point). Nina didn’t fit in, and so got the axe. Max annoyed people, and so he was booted. Jenn openly hated most of the people left, and now she’s on the jury. It’s a consistent pattern. Now the people on the outs are Shirin, who most everyone finds annoying, and Mike, whose “killing of the moment” last episode has made everyone hate him. From a psychological standpoint, this is great! A lot can be learned from these interactions and power dynamics. As a viewer, though, it pains me to see people get penalized for actually playing the game, which is a consequence of this more social voting dynamic. It sickens me that we have to lose great strategists in this game, and as someone who identifies with the “weird” people, I’m not too happy with that direction. Maybe this pattern will persist beyond this season, maybe it won’t. For now, it’s just an interesting dichotomy.

Challenge Time. And today’s challenge is even MORE derivative than the reward challenge! It combines the water-dunking element first seen on “Survivor Africa” with the holding of the twisted rod from “Survivor Philippines”. Not a bad combination, and I do like that they’ve gone back to using water in the bucket, rather than the corny paint. And it is an endurance challenge, so perhaps I’m selling it short. Or perhaps I’m put out with the twist on this challenge. There will be two immunities: one for the men, and one for the women. This is a twist often done right at the merge, but here it’s been saved for later. I’m not a fan of saving it for now, for the simple reason of it being unfair. When you do it at the merge, with 10 or 12 people around, each gender has at least four or five people to beat. Now, however, while the men still have to beat four other guys, the women have significantly greater odds of winning. Put simply, the percentage change in likelihood of winning for each gender has increased by waiting this long, and I don’t like this increase. Plus, at this point, the single immunity precedent has been well-established, and this changing of the status quo just feels unnecessary to me.

In an odd parallel to the outcome of the first immunity challenge of “Survivor All-Stars”, we have out male and female rivals facing off against each other as the final two. Mike goes up against Rodney, and Shirin faces Carolyn. Mike manages to win again, with a fairly impressive performance, but Shirin can’t quite hang on. This means that the target for the episode will be Shirin, with no splitting of the vote. After all, Rodney’s alliance would have to turn on one of their own, in that case, which is unthinkable for them. So Shirin is going home tonight, much to most everyone’s delight.

Of course, Shirin is not ready to go, and pleads a pretty good case. She points out to Sound-Byte Dan and Sierra how big of a threat Tyler is, as well as how non-threatening she is, what with her sucking at challenges, and being generally disliked by the jury. Sierra seems willing to consider it, but only if they get a majority. Thus, it comes down to Sound-Byte Dan, who pretty much ignores Shirin’s appeal (despite protesting the contrary), and even the words of Mike seem to fall on deaf ears. Still, there’s enough misdirection that Tribal tonight will keep its unpredictable streak.

At Tribal, we… OH FOR THE LOVE OF GOD! We start off with the Will thing AGAIN! Like I said, nothing against Shirin, but I’m tired of this storyline, and it dominates the Tribal Council. To give credit where credit is due, though, it is a fairly exciting Tribal. After the aforementioned argument, we get some blatant politicking from Shirin (she really is the star of this Tribal Council), openly pointing out her argument, and outing Tyler’s game pretty quickly. I have to say, for all that Tyler’s been playing well, this is a run of bad luck for him. He was doing pretty well at staying below the radar before, but now he’s getting outed left, right, and center. Don’t know what this says about his game, but I’m not so sure he’ll win. Carolyn does damage control, but the question of where Sierra and Sound-Byte Dan place in Rodney’s alliance hangs in the air.

The coup de grace, though, is Mike, who takes a leaf out of the book of Malcolm Freberg (“Survivor Philippines”), when, before the vote, he busts out his hidden immunity idol, saying he’ll play it for Shirin, and tells the others that Shirin is voting Tyler. He keeps his vote a secret, for no apparent reason, but it’s meant to cause dissent in the ranks, and it pretty well works.

Like with Malcolm’s strategy in “Survivor Caramoan”, Rodney’s alliance calls the bluff, and mostly vote for Shirin anyway. Unlike Malcolm, though, Mike keeps his idol, sending Shirin home. I’m a bit surprised to be saying this, but I’m sorry to see her go. Yeah, she was a bit out there, and I don’t think she was quite the strategist she thought she was, but she got better as time went on, and it was fun to see her game evolve. Plus, the spat with Will, although it went on far too long, made her sympathetic. Don’t think I’d want to see her back on another season, but I am sorry she’s off this one.

Her exit was not in vain, however, as Mike’s bluff got both Will and Tyler to switch their votes to Sound-Byte Dan. This could be just the dissent in the ranks Mike needs to keep on fighting in this game. I hope he does, as he’s still my best hope to win at this point. In that vain, it was a good move for him to keep his idol, as not Rodney’s alliance will be FORCED to vote out one of their own, or else leave it all up to Mike next Tribal Council. As to whether or not voting out Shirin was a smart move, it’s hard to say. It was a good call of the bluff, and it keeps the alliance intact, but I think swing votes Sierra and Sound-Byte Dan should have flipped. Whether they see it or not, they’re on the bottom of that alliance, and need to get themselves in a power position. Yeah, it could have resulted in a tie, but Sound-Byte Dan’s extra vote could have broken it. Now, it may be too late. Even with Sound-Byte Dan’s extra vote, the core 4 are still tight, and therefore the best that can be done now is to tie them. Sierra and Sound-Byte Dan may have ended their games prematurely with this move. Still, after this Tribal Council, which was very exciting, I’d say anything’s possible.

This episode was somewhat sub-par (apart from the finish, which was great), but it has paved the way for what should be an excellent next episode!
-Matt
Title Credit to Jean Storrs.

Idol Speculation: “Survivor Worlds Apart” Episode 9: Temper, Temper

Before the start of this season, Probst famously declared this particular cast “Possibly the greatest cast of all time.”  Having seen a majority of the season now, a lot of people have been disagreeing with that assessment.  Not that they think the cast is bad, per se, but they think Probst may have been overstating his position.  For a while, I attributed it to Probst’s tendency towards hyperbole in hyping up a season, but this episode, I feel, offers a better explanation.  Probst has gone on record that what he really likes in a season is big characters.  He doesn’t care about how likeable said characters are, just that they’ve got enough personality to cause lots of drama.  As this episode demonstrates, this cast has that quality in spades when needed.  The trouble is that the viewing audience, unlike Probst, wants their characters to be likeable, and while they do like them over the top, they don’t want them to be so annoying that they become unwatchable.  Take, for instance, Probst’s loving of “Survivor Redemption Island”.  While part of that is his absolute fanboying over Boston Rob (“Survivor Marquesas”), another part of that is some of the big characters that season produced, particularly Phillip “Special Agent?” Sheppard.  The audience, on the other hand, was sick of Boston Rob, and found Phillip annoying.  Ergo, a lot of the problem is that Probst’s standards for entertainment and everyone else’s standards for entertainment differ wildly.  Case in point, this episode.  While not a bad one, it does have a lot of bad elements, and it does bode ill for the future.

But enough about that, let’s start off the episode.  The one strategic argument for keeping Joe around was that he took the heat off of Mike as a challenge threat.  Shock of all shocks, with Joe gone, Mike gets talked about as a challenge threat!  Not that I’m saying Joe should have been kept around for that reason, but it was kind of an obvious prophecy.  Rodney is still trying to keep Will, Carolyn, and Tyler with him (making this a much more viable alliance than I initially gave credit, given the fact that it’s held out this long), even going to far as to move up his timetable.  Evidently, he plans to pull in a few more people, and blindside Mike.  Not a bad plan.  Don’t see how Rodney, charmer that he is, can win friends and influence people, but not a bad plan.  The major flaw is that MIKE IS STANDING RIGHT BEHIND YOU!  Well ok, the implication is that he’s hidden a little ways off, but the point still stands that Rodney and company ought to have checked around them before holding this conversation.  Seriously, when did doing a 360 check of your surroundings before doing strategy go out of style?  This is getting into “Survivor One World” levels of stupid.  Again, I KNOW that Mike is hidden, but that’s why you grab a stick and poke around in adjacent shrubbery a little bit.  Not enough to hurt, but enough to tell if there’s someone there.  In any case, Mike does not take this insurrection well, and swears revenge.

But, as this season has taught us, we can’t stay on interesting strategy too long!  Onto the reward challenge!  Today we have the traditional auction challenge, but I do like the little touch that the auction area is called “Trader Jeff’s”.  It lends a unique air to the auction, and is corny in that good “Survivor” way.  Also makes me wonder if “Trader Joe’s” is a sponsor of “Survivor”.  As is his want, Probst bans the sharing of items, which in my opinion makes for a less interesting auction, but this is then more than made up for with the start of the auction.  Continuing with what has lately become tradition, Probst keeps the first item covered.  Will gets it for $100, only to discover that it’s a note sending him back to camp, getting nothing from the auction.  I’ve come around to liking this idea later, but in the moment, I think it’s kind of a douchebag move, Probst.  It’s one thing for someone to bid on the “Send someone to Exile Island and take their money” reward, that’s giving SOMEONE something, but just kicking Will out like that for taking a risk does not encourage bidding, which I assume you want.  Just to make the kicking off of Will even harder, the next food item up is fried chicken and waffles.  Given Will’s “Water is the black man’s kryptonite” line earlier this season, I feel like he could have had a good one-liner or two about that item.  And you denied us that, you meanie.  Shirin jumps the bidding up to $300 immediately, which sticks.  Probst comments on her not saving her money for the advantage, and Shirin admits that she made a conscious decision to not go for the advantage.  Shirin, if you want to call yourself a strategic genius, like you’ve been doing this season, you kind on NEED to save your bid for that.  Oh, well, this makes Probst take a poll, showing that Mike, Carolyn, Sound-Byte Dan, and Sierra are all saving their money for the advantage later on (though oddly, Sierra reneges on this, and Probst does not acknowledge her intent at the time).  This leads to something that simultaneously makes this the best and worst auction imaginable: the editing.  Rather than hear all of the clever bidding wars and strategy that come for the food, we get a quick montage of people who want to eat getting food.  Notably, Jenn gets a large mixed drink, and Rodney scores a steak, which he can’t shut up about.  Now, I know montages have been a part of auctions for a while now, and that we want to get to the interesting bit about the advantage, but just skipping 80% of the auction seems uncool.  I know we need to save time, and this is a better method of speeding things along than Probst’s “Get really mad” action on “Survivor Cagayan”, but it still feels like we’ve been denied a good chunk of the show.  Maybe it’s just me, but given some of the unpleasantness we get this episode, I feel like I would have rather seen the auction in full.

In any case, after the food but before the advantage, Probst unveils the customary “letters from home” reward, in an attempt to get the holdouts to crumble.  Unfortunately for him, Shirin is there, and she points out that in most cases with letters at the auction, Probst lets other people buy in on the winning bid.  Accordingly, the cast lets Sierra have it for $20.  This is where Probst, who’s famous for hating colluding, ought to change it up and let only Sierra have the letters, and for once I would agree with him.  While I’m not against colluding per se, and definitely feel like Shirin was just stating the obvious, something about how blatant of a collusion this was makes me want to see it changed up.  Plus, it would have created some nice drama, and as I’ll be discussing later, producer-implemented twists causing drama is what’s keeping the season going at this point.  Unfortunately, Probst gives in and allows everyone to buy in at $20.  Thankfully, we still get a bit of drama, mixed in with bad gameplay.  Everyone agrees to the collusion, but Mike, for some reason, insists on buying in last.  This is because later on, he turns his back on Probst and opts not to buy the letter initially.  This is a TERRIBLE IDEA for a number of reasons.  Mike’s stated reason later on (and oh, we’ll be talking about how he says it) is that he was afraid of Rodney’s alliance getting the advantage, so he wanted to save his money.  I would understand this IF RODNEY OR HIS ALLIANCE HADN’T ALREADY BOUGHT FOOD!  Admittedly, Carolyn was still tied with him, but Sound-Byte Dan is on your side, meaning you have a 2/3 chance of success.  Not as good as 100% success, but if you factor in the fact that by going back on your word so publically you seem untrustworthy, it’s not worth it.  I’m all for taking the most strategic route normally, but this is not subtle, and loses you more than it gains.  No advantage, however powerful, is worth everyone being mad at you for publicly going back on your word.  Finally, we see that Carolyn can theoretically return her letters, so it would have been pointless anyway.  Mike realizes this problem and changes his mind, but the damage is done, and is a rare misstep for the man who’s been the major voice of strategy this season.

As predicted, it comes down to a draw of rocks between Mike, Carolyn, and Sound-Byte Dan (Sierra, despite have $480 like everyone else, did not go for it, for whatever reason).  Sound-Byte Dan ends up getting the advantage, much to the audience’s dismay, and not just because Sound-Byte Dan is becoming one of the more reviled contestants ever.  No, it’s because he’s arguably the least interesting of the three for it to go to.  Mike’s in a power position, so it would have been interesting to see how he used it, and Carolyn, being between two alliances, could have had fun with the advantage.  Sound-Byte Dan, on the other hand, has no real power at this point, and people don’t want to see him have things that keep him around.  He does become a swing-vote later on, making things more interesting, but still, worst possible outcome.

Fortunately, Will has a slightly more positive outcome.  It turns out that his leaving the auction to head back to camp was NOT just a big “EFF YOU!” from production, but another twist.  It turns out that Will has won a store of rations buried in the camp that no one else knows about.  Said rations consist of dried fruit, beef jerky, and some sort of energy powder for the water.  Not a feast, but interesting in that it’s an auction food reward that can be kept from everyone else.  Will, however, quickly realizes that such a food store is going to be hard to hide from everyone else, and it’s not worth risking his neck over such little food.  He therefore does the sensible thing of bringing the food back to share.  I’m sure Gervase Peterson (“Survivor Borneo”) and Tyson Apostol (“Survivor Tocantins”) are yelling at their screens at this moment, but I stand behind it being a good move.  Hiding it would be too high a risk for too little reward.  Above all, I’m just happy that Will wasn’t totally screwed by the auction.  And for those wanting drama from Will’s reward, don’t worry, it’s coming.

Moving away from food, talk quickly turns to the letters from home that everyone but Will got (yeah, Will’s a little bit pissed about that).  Given that this is such a lovey-dovey time, when emotions hover just below the surface, Mike decides that this is the PERFECT time to belligerently bring up Rodney’s sub-alliance.  Seriously, I don’t know what’s up with Mike, but he has been off this episode.  Apart from his timing being horrible, this is NOT the way to confront an opposing alliance.  You want to quietly go to your alliance-mates, and whisper in their ears the machinations of their enemies, then blindside the opposing alliance at Tribal Council.  You do NOT get into an argument about it with the other alliance, thus exposing your strategy, and making you look like such an ass that your own alliance turns against you.  Seriously, was Mike taking stupid pills between episodes?  Something’s happened to him, because his gameplay is not nearly as good this episode.  He does apologize for his outburst, but once again, the damage is done.

As if on cue, this bad gameplay turns Sierra against him because he “killed the moment”.  Sound-Byte Dan, however, is a tougher sell.  Surprisingly, Rodney plays the situation really well (possibly the only person who has good gameplay this episode), and goes over to Sound-Byte Dan in the guise of comforting him in the emotional moment, but also uses the time to plant seeds in Sound-Byte Dan’s head about how Mike is a bad guy who needs to get eliminated.  It’s actually a bit of subtle manipulation that I wouldn’t have expected out of Rodney.  For all his bluster, he evidently can give a good bit of strategy if he needs to.

This scene is followed up by revealing the “advantage” that Sound-Byte Dan won, and by extension, revealing the big twist that Probst hyped up before the season.  For once, it’s something that actually deserving of hype.  Sound-Byte Dan, at precisely one Tribal Council of his choosing, gets a second vote.  Yeah, that’s a pretty big twist alright, and for once, something we haven’t seen before.  So, with such a major twist to the game, the big question is how well it will be received.  Like I said, I’m not a big fan of Sound-Byte Dan having said advantage, but for the twist by itself, it’s pretty good.  Admittedly, it’s pretty obvious that it was implemented to build up dramatic tension about the stability of an alliance (as an alliance theoretically now needs one less person to gain majority), but you could argue the same thing about the hidden immunity idol.  By extension, it also has the same flaw as the hidden immunity idol, wherein if the majority alliance gets it, it can make the game boring and predictable, as insurrection is harder to pull off.  Unlike some other twists I’ve railed against (notably Redemption Island), I like this one.  It fits within the confines of the game, shakes things, and really does come as a surprised to everyone involved.  I could see some people rallying against this twist on the grounds that it violates the core of “Survivor”.  However, I would counter-argue that it does not.  There is no doctrine of “One person, one vote” like there is for “Once the decision is made, the decision is final.”  Nowhere is it written that everyone is allowed only one voted.  I’d have a problem with something like, say, one person not being allowed to vote, as that’s taking away from someone’s ability to play the game.  Here, however, we have an advantage, like the hidden immunity idol, that requires skill in needing to use it.  I would also point out that there was a lot of backlash against both tribe shuffles and hidden immunity idols in their first implementation, and they’ve both been used effectively since.  So yes, I do think this is a good, exciting twist to the game.

That being said, I hope this twist doesn’t come back, and is just a one season thing.  You see the main difference between this twist and something like splitting the tribes or the hidden immunity idol, is that there’s not a whole lot you can do to change it.  You can change how it’s earned, perhaps, but not much beyond that. Both the tribe swap and the hidden immunity idol have layers of strategy added to them.  The former occurs mostly in how it’s done, but with the latter, do you go with or against the idol?  You can split the vote to overcome it, but that leads to a lot of risk.  There’s not a lot you can do to overcome an extra vote, apart from forming a supermajority where two votes one way or the other don’t matter.  The person with the extra vote really has not recourse after this, plus a supermajority makes for a boring game.  So yeah, this one should be fun to see, but I hope it’s not a regular thing.  It’ll just get too repetitive.

Remember when I said that Will’s reward would cause so drama later?  It’s later.  Basically, Mike and Jenn, in their paranoia, get to talking about Will’s reward.  Specifically, since they haven’t seen the box, they think Will’s holding out on them, and trying to play the good guy while hording the “good food” for himself.  An unfounded rumor, but one you can understand coming up.  Tyler hears about this bickering, and passes it on to Will, as he and Will are aligned.  To say that Will does not take it well is an understatement.  Will blows up, and oddly blows up on Shirin, who as far as the audience can tell did not say anything.  Neither Mike nor Jenn was in the area at the time, but that’s no reason to blow up on Shirin.  Will’s not particularly known for his gameplay, and this doesn’t do him any favors, but it’s an understandable frustration, so at first, apart from taking it out on an innocent party (as far as we know), it’s not too bad.  But then Will goes into the personal attacks, calling Shirin a “loser” and saying no one likes her.  Ok, Jenn, all is forgiven.  WILL is the new scumbag of the season!  Yes, Sound-Byte Dan is off the hook as well.  I’m willing to accept a lot of negative things in this game, but when you go for the personal attacks, particularly ones as harsh as these, you lose me.  This tantrum gains NOTHING for Will, looks awful, and makes everyone watching feel awful.  I don’t care WHAT she might have said about your character, Will, those insults were uncalled for.  You did not need to do them, and I really don’t like you for saying them.  And yet, it’s one of the things that makes Probst love this season.  Apart from just being another argument that he can hold up and say “Great Cast”, it shows that the cast reacts to the twists in the game.  A twist that amounts to nothing falls flat, and is boring to watch.  Thus, one good thing about this season is that nearly every twist hits home.  But that’s a good thing about production, not a good thing about the cast, and while it’s better to have it than not to have it, the fact remains that such twists could have worked on other seasons.  Thus, I won’t give this season too much credit just because the twists it implemented worked out really well.  Seasons with big twists that work out well can be poor seasons overall (“Survivor One World”), and seasons with twists that work out poorly can still be great (“Survivor Tocantins”).

What makes the situation even worse, as Shirin points out, is that not one person sticks up for her.  Well, Mike does, but only after he gets back, and she’s taken PLENTY of verbal abuse by that point.  But seriously, NO ONE ELSE stuck up for her.  I get that it’s a game and you want to keep your head down, but there comes a point where you need to just stand up and say “back off”.  I don’t think most people will hate you for defending someone picked on.  Well, Will might in this case, but he’s one vote.  This is more important.

Shirin has a hug it out session with Mike and Jenn, but she gets her revenge shortly afterward.  It’s challenge time, but before the challenge itself, Will makes Jeff an offer.  He’ll sit out the immunity challenge, making himself vulnerable, in exchange for his letters from home.  Probst says he sees this as a fair deal, but says that everyone on the tribe has to agree in order for it to be allowed.  Probst asks anyone to raise their hand if they feel that Will sitting out the challenge is unfair.  Personally, I’d think everyone would WANT one less competitor in the challenge (even if said competitor is Will), but Shirin raises her hand.  Her stated reason is that “Will’s loss is part of the game”, which is a fair argument, but we all know the real reason is that Will was a dick to her earlier.  Can’t say I’m feeling too sorry for Will in that regard.

The challenge itself is “meh”.  It’s a combination of challenges from “Survivor China” and “Survivor Blood vs. Water”.  Using a giant pair of tongs, each person must transport six balls over a series of see-saws and place them on a final holder.  First person to have all six balls in place wins immunity.  While this is a difficult challenge, and a combination not seen before, it feels very underwhelming.  The obstacles they need to cross feel like they could have been tougher, and there’s just no touch to the challenge that makes it personal to the season.  For instance, had the final ball holder been a candelabra, or something island-specific, it would have stood out more.  On top of this, this is a challenge where once a person gets a lead, they’ll pretty clearly hold it.  Case in point, Mike wins immunity with ultimately no real competition.  The whole thing is rounded out by Will promising a memorable Tribal Council.

Back at the camp, Rodney’s alliance, now with Sierra and Sound-Byte Dan on board (you know Mike’s screwed up bad when Sierra is willing to side with RODNEY over him) plan to split the vote 3 v. 3 between Jenn and Shirin, with Jenn being the primary target.  Realizing this, Mike, Shirin, and Jenn campaign to get Sound-Byte Dan on their side in order to vote off Carolyn, as their four votes would then be enough.  Mike talks to Sound-Byte Dan, and while he’s probably the best choice, Mike’s off-day is doing him no favors.  True, he’s calmer and more logical than previously this episode, but he still comes across as strongarming Sound-Byte Dan.  Strangely, Sound-Byte Dan, despite being a supposed “superfan” is NOT happy to be in the best position of all, angrily telling Rodney and company to lay off him when they question him about talking with Mike.  Man, I wasn’t lying in the title of this episode.  Everyone really is blowing up for no reason.

What can I say?  Tribal was exactly as promised: a lot of painful-yet-fascinating arguing.  We get a rehash of the Will and Shirin brawl that reduces Shirin to tears.  Will digs himself even deeper by denying his saying those things, and when he DOES admit he said them, he claims it’s because “They’re true.”  Well, add another person to the list of “People no one wants to win.”  We get a brief bit of calm where we talk about how blurred the tribal lines have been, before Mike and Rodney tear into each other about alliances again, all ending with a pretty good argument from both sides about why to side with them: loyalty and position vs. getting out threats.  Basically, the episode in a microcosm.

Once again, the episode keeps me guessing, yet I’m surprised when Jenn goes home.  Evidently realizing they were doomed, Mike and Shirin vote for Jenn.  Man, Shirin cannot catch a break.  It seems like the minute she makes her way into an alliance, said alliance loses power.  But yeah, Jenn.  While she wasn’t nearly as bad as last episode (and looks positively heavenly compared to Will now), I still haven’t gotten over her giving up.  Glad she’s gone, hope never to see her again.

But yeah, this episode is a tough nut to crack.  I can’t say it wasn’t fascinating to watch, but there was so much horrible gameplay and unnecessary mean comments that I can’t say I like it.  It’s like watching a car wreck: it’s a horrible thing to see, yet you can’t bring yourself to look away.  However, in this case, it’s made worse by the fact that the number of people to root for are swiftly dwindling.  The only people who came off well this episode were Rodney and Shirin, and they have their past reputations to deal with. Not a good position to be in endgame.  This is where Probst and the audience differ: just because these are big personalities that make for interesting episodes, Probst likes the cast.  But the audience wants people to root for, as well as against, and we don’t have very much of that.  This season was doing pretty well, but if this endgame keeps going the direction it is, it may be for naught.

Big characters make for an interesting season.  But interesting does not always equal “good”.

-Matt

Title Credit to Jean Storrs.

Idol Speculation: “Survivor Worlds Apart” Episode 8: Learning to Like Shirin in 2 Easy Steps

People keep wanting to compare this season to “Survivor Cagayan”, and I won’t deny that there are parallels between the two seasons. I will also freely admit that I’ve been one of the many people making comparisons between this season and “Survivor Cagayan”. After this episode, though, I’m noticing a pattern that makes me believe this season is more comparable to “Survivor Philippines”. No episode is a spectacular, stand-out episode that will be talked about for seasons to come, but every episode is solid, having good misdirection, some decent strategy, and characters that are fun to see develop. Admittedly, I might be underselling “Survivor Philippines” a bit, and I might be praising the characters of this season more than I should, but I think the overarching pattern matches pretty well. I definitely prefer “Survivor Philippines” to this, if only because the characters who stood out at that season were pleasant ones (compared to Rodney and Sound-Byte Dan on this season), but my point stands. Case in point for this point, we have an episode that manages to produce both great strategy and immense frustration in the form of yet ANOTHER quitter… CRASH!

JENN: Hey, I’m no quitter! I don’t do that!

ME: (Puts face in hands).

JENN: What’s going on? All the other contestants who’ve done this have told me your whole shtick is to get incredibly frustrated at whoever busts into your apartment and starts arguing with you.

ME: Frankly, at this point I’ve just gotten used to it. I already fill out a damage repair form for my landlord at the start of each season. But my frustration is that I really don’t want to see YOU! You, Jenn, have reached a new low in my book, a low reserved for quitters and Russell Hantz of “Survivor Samoa”. A low where your very presence, your very ASSOCIATION with the show that I love causes bile to rise within me whenever the mere CONCEPT of your existence is mentioned.

JENN: But that doesn’t make sense. I told you, I didn’t quit.

ME: True, and this puts you a HAIR above the lowest of the low, but that’s still pretty low. You did not actually go through with the act, but nevertheless, you gave up, which is just as bad. Worse, you didn’t give up for a sympathetic reason, like you’d fulfilled your spiritual journey, or the island just broke you. You gave up because you were on the bottom. Big deal. Real strength is hitting that bottom, but persevering nonetheless. I would have expected at least that from you.

JENN: But you did get that. I didn’t quit.

ME: You’re not listening! What you’ve done is tantamount to quitting! Worse, you’re basically acting as a troll in the game! The only reason you put up with the island for the rest of the day rather than quit was because you wanted to laugh at the dominant alliance. You claim to be a fan, but you have not passion for the game. Indeed, at a lot of times you seem to outright LOATHE the game! Yet you expect me to like you, just because you didn’t pull the trigger. In some ways, it might have been better if you had. Put yourself out of the viewership’s misery.

JENN:…

ME: Look, I know I’m being a bit hard on you. In real life, I’m sure you’re a nice person. But when I see someone give up, just because a few things on the island aren’t going their way, all I can think is “Wow. Someone who loves the show, who would give ANYTHING to have your spot, is at home all because YOU, who can’t handle being on the bottom without your best friend, is there>” it makes you kind of hard to root for.

JENN:… But I didn’t quit.

ME: Ah, back to tradition. Get out of here! Where’s my nice new Manono buff?

(Jenn leaves in a hurry).

All that unpleasantness aside, our episode actually starts where most of them do. In this case, however, rather than discuss the vote of Tribal Council, Shirin and Sound-Byte Dan continue their argument about whether or not “flippers” can win. Presumably Hali’s exit is not discussed because Hali had about as little impact on the game as the price of turnips in Timbuctoo have on the game. In any case, the argument of Shirin and Sound-Byte Dan basically ends up centering around what ones definition of a “flipper” is, but Shirin wisely just acquiesces to Sound-Byte Dan, since that’s what he wants, so nothing comes of it. For some reason, Shirin tries to cause havoc by saying that at the end, she’ll vote for Mike, but it goes nowhere and Shirin changes to a better strategy later, so I won’t dwell on it. Jenn also whines some about being “done with the game”, but as I just had a large rant about that subject, and there’ll be more chances to run that point into the ground later, so I’ll say no more about it. What DOES bear mentioning is the strategic game of Shirin, which really came into prominence this episode. Shirin, while not being very socially graceful or aware, is not a moron either (despite some evidence to the contrary), and realizes that her status as not physically fit and annoying makes her non-threatening. Thus, if she can just weasel her way through a few votes, she might be able to work her way into the alliance, and get to the end. Not the most proactive plan I’ve ever heard of, but a good one nonetheless. Mike seems skeptical when Shirin tries to ingratiate herself to him and Sierra, but the fact remains that she does an ok job, and has actually come up with a decent strategy. To use some old clichés, Joe’s ship of an alliance is sinking, and Shirin is the proverbial rat bailing from the sinking ship. Given that at this point it’s clear that a desire to get rid of Joe is what’s holding Mike’s alliance together, it’s clear that staying in Joe’s alliance is not a path to victory. Better to bail and reap the rewards thereof. This is particularly amazing because this is SHIRIN we’re talking about. NOBODY gave this woman any odds of survival after the monkey-sex incident. And I certainly don’t think she’ll win, but she’s showing decent strategic chops, and could make it far. Again, like a lot of things this season, it’s nothing we haven’t seen before, but it’s still fun to watch, and seems impressive. I may be selling this cast short, in that I’m saying that fairly basic strategy is genius coming from them, but it’s mostly that I’m just happy we’re getting ANY strategy from this group.

But instead of more fun strategy, the show seeks to give us a reward challenge that is simultaneously boring and painful to watch. It’s your standard team obstacle course. Divided into teams of five by schoolyard pick, one at a time each team swims out, goes up and over a ramp, crawls through a net partially sunk in the water, crosses a balance beam, and then climbs up to the platform. Once the entire team is there, each team tosses a grappling hook at rings in the water, with the first team to hook five rings winning a chocolate feast a la “Survivor Guatemala”. What can I say? It’s a team challenge post merge. It’s an obstacle course. All the obstacles are generic and boring. There’s really not much to like about this challenge. Now, to the credit of the challenge, the net thing was ok to watch, and I actually like them doing the grappling hook in the water, which adds some difficulty and is something they haven’t really done before. But the boringness of the challenge overall just drowns out the few good elements it has. I should also say that the one major upside to the challenge is that both teams are pretty evenly matched physically. Mike, Tyler, Sound-Byte Dan, Shirin, and Sierra are the blue team, while Rodney, Carolyn, Jenn, Will, and Joe are on the red team. Unfortunately, even this match-up ends up being a big painful to watch. Oh, the teams are even pretty much all the way through, but Will and Sound-Byte Dan end up going at the same time, and so much fun is made at their expense that it’s awful. And don’t get me wrong, I can see the appeal of laughing at a bad challenge performance. Lord knows I’ve whiled away a few minutes laughing at Chris Daugherty’s attempts at the balance beam on “Survivor Vanuatu”. But here, rather than laugh at the performance, it seems like Probst in particular is laughing at Will and Sound-Byte Dan’s physical ability. I’m aware that neither of them will win any awards for fitness, but as someone who’s medically obese, it’s not fun to see. And they punctuate it all with an out-of-place Wilhelm Scream. I kid you not, there was an honest-to-God Wilhelm Scream on “Survivor”. We really have sunk that low.

As expected, it’s a close race, leading to the blue team’s victory. This, in turn, leads to Jenn whining again, though this time we have Joe putting her in her place, at which the audience lets out a collective cheer. Joe rightly points out that this is what they signed up for, and they have to take the good along with the bad, which is very much the correct answer.

Speaking of things good, the blue team goes on reward. All enjoy the chocolate, but once again, Shirin benefits the most, as she now has a chance to ingratiate herself with the alliance she was trying to get into. I would say, like with the reward at the new Nagarote a few episodes ago, that there’s only so much a reward can do, but on this same reward, Sierra professes that she “Loves everyone on the reward!” Bear in mind that “everyone” in this case includes Sound-Byte Dan, possibly the person Sierra despises the most. If chocolate can make her warm up to HIM, Shirin is definitely “in” as they say.

Evidently rewards are only interesting if a clue to a hidden immunity idol is found, and since one isn’t, we cut quickly back to camp, where the Jenn pity party continues. Rodney, in what’s admittedly a good episode for him, tries to keep everyone’s spirits high, despite the loss. To that end, they decide to kill another chicken, which drops Jenn into a lower funk than before. She whines once again, but I take particular issue with it this time because she claims they are slaughtering “her chickens” without asking her. Um, no Jenn, they’re not. They’re slaughtering the TRIBE’S chickens, and you’ve been overruled. You don’t have to like it, but they’re not doing an injustice. Just because you take care of the chickens does not make them yours. You have no ownership over them. Get off of your pity pot.

Thankfully, Jenn does find a bit of levity. Of all sources, Rodney is the one to pull her out of her funk.

Yes, you did just read that sentence.

In all fairness, Rodeny starts doing an impression of Mike and Sound-Byte Dan at Tribal Council. He’s obviously mimicking some specific points that they made, which we didn’t hear, so the humor is somewhat lost on the audience. Still, it can’t be denied that Rodney is actually quite a good mimic, and it makes Jenn happy for a little bit, and it’s nice to get some contrast with the rest of the episode. Rodney’s humor even brings in a little strategy. Joe, who I’m coming to respect as more than just a challenge beast, notes that Rodney does not have any love for Mike, and Joe speculates that he can use it to get ahead. This observation doesn’t really go anywhere later in the episode, but it’s nice to get even an inkling of strategy.

But enough of that, we haven’t had enough of Jenn whining this episode, let’s get some more! This time, however, the whining does have some strategic value. Jenn admits that the more she asks to go home, the more people will want to keep her around, as she’s not a threat. Ok, I can see the logic of that. Then she says that if it’s herself and Joe at the end of the challenge, Joe should step down so she can win. Then she’ll give Joe the necklace at Tribal Council so she will be voted out, and they can watch Mike’s alliance squirm. Um, here’s an idea: If it’s you and Joe and at the end of the challenge, and you want Joe to win, LET HIM WIN! I know that her idea is that it’ll be more unexpected this way, but this plan is pointlessly complicated. True, from a viewer perspective, it’s great, as it adds tension and gives us our misdirection, but it’s a pointless plan. Really, this gets into why Jenn’s desire to leave the game bugs me so much: she’s a troll. Not a physical one, but an internet troll, of sorts. She doesn’t care about the game, she doesn’t even seem to respect it or those who play it (which is odd because, as I’ve mentioned, she has a good strategic nugget every now and again). She just wants to cause trouble basically because she sees the game as stupid. Her being tired and on the bottom has made this more pronounced. Again, I just cringe at the thought that there are so many people out there who want to be on the show badly, but instead, we get people with no respect for the game who just quit when the going gets tough. And yes, despite the fact that she did not follow through and quit outright, I do consider Jenn a quitter. She gave up in the face of adversity. As long as the adversity is not life-threatening (in which case I do understand quitting), there’s no reason to give up. Yeah, you best friend on the island just got voted out, and things look bleak, but there are cracks, keep trying to get ahead!

Still, strategy about the challenge would not matter much if it were not immediately followed by a challenge! And this one kind of sucks to. It’s an exact copy of the “Hold the block on a frame by standing on your tiptoes” challenge from “Survivor Cagayan”. Literally the only thing that’s changed is that the blocks are now octagons instead of squares. Yay. While I won’t call this a “bad” challenge, as it is a sadistic endurance challenge, which tends to be very enjoyable, it just falls flat, and I hate repeat challenge.

For some reason, Probst is big on telling people to be gentle when they fall off of their perches. Jenn even gets in on the action, snapping at Sound-Byte Dan for galumphing off of his perch. My thought is “These people are collapsing from exhaustion, and you want them to do it GENTLY?!” I can understand the concern, but particularly for big guys like Sound-Byte Dan, I think you’re just asking too much.

As tension dictates, it comes down to Jenn and Tyler. Jenn, however, fails, meaning we need new misdirection for this Tribal Council. Once again this episode, Shirin comes to the rescue! Showing yet MORE strategic acumen, she rightly surmises that, given the supermajority of Mike’s alliance, they’ll split the vote, most likely between Jenn and Joe. This means that, if they want Joe to stay in the game, they can vote for Jenn, and she’ll go home. Not a bad plan, if you’re Joe. And as Jenn isn’t really playing the game anymore, I can see why she’d want Joe to stick around. But why does Shirin want Joe in the game still? He could beat her in immunity, easily, and then with no other targets, she’d be next. Plus, if she’s trying to get in with Mike’s alliance, wouldn’t it be better to FOLLOW their plan, rather than make your own? I can’t deny that her predictions are logical and accurate, but does this plan make sense for her?

Sure enough, Shirin soon has this debate herself, adding still more tension to the upcoming Tribal Council. Still, Joe thinks we STILL don’t have enough misdirection, and he accordingly ditches Sound-Byte Dan (after the ONE SCENE we had where he didn’t make an ass of himself!), and uses his jeweler skills to make up a fake idol from bits and bobs he found around the island. Have to say, it looks pretty good. Might even rival the fake idols of Bob Crowley (“Survivor Gabon”). The flaw here is in Joe’s execution. First off, he says to Mike that if Mike keeps him around that evening, he’ll give Mike the idol after Tribal Council. Mike holds out getting the idol immediately, but Joe wisely says no deal. My question is, why is Mike even considering this? Joe is too big a threat to keep around, and even if the idol IS real, you’re splitting the vote, so it won’t matter. There’s not point to seriously consider this as an actually deal. Which Mike does. Loss of intelligence points there, my friend. On top of this, when Joe DOES give Mike the idol, Mike should IMMEDIATELY be able to tell it’s fake. No matter how many idols are on a particular season, they all look the same. At the very least, they are shaped in a similar way, and only differ in small details to distinguish which tribe they are from. Bob Crowley’s fake idols worked both because no one apart from Sugar had a good look at the real idol, and also because Bob was smart enough to keep his idols fairly well-concealed when people looked at them, casting doubt as to whether or not they were authentic. But Mike has SEEN an idol. He should KNOW it’s a fake! I should be more mad about this, but I’m still just agape that Mike is even CONSIDERING the offer.

What can I say about Tribal Council? We get some witty remarks here and there, but the trouble is most of the Council centers around Jenn’s desire to quit, something that fills me with hatred and that I’ve already discussed at length this blog. I feel no need to go over my thoughts on Jenn yet again.

The one area of note is right before the vote, when Joe does end up giving Mike the fake idol. Guess Mike was able to negotiate after all. Mike then takes a leaf out of the Tony Vlachos (“Survivor Cagayan”) playbook, and asks Probst to verify the idol. Probst turns him down, saying the votes have to be cast first, and then the idol played, before it can be verified. Mike argues that the legitimacy of the idol is relevant to the vote, but Probst, rightly so, is unrelenting. Thus we get are vote, where I’m torn on the outcome, both in terms of what I expect, and what I think should happen. The editing really wants Jenn to go home tonight, but this feels like a case of best-laid-plans going awry, so I’m unsure of the vote. As to what I want, I’ve always been in favor of kicking off quitters as both the smart and entertaining move. Those who want to play the game are the ones who make it exciting, so I’d rather have them around. In terms of being smart, well, strategic players are often predictable players, as they’ll always make a move in their best interest. A quitter, however, is free from any obligations to playing the game well, and is therefore unpredictable. This is particularly pronounced with Jenn, whose STATED AGENDA is to cause chaos in the game. However, I keep coming back to the “Joe is too big a threat” argument. Much as I hate to admit it, it’s better to keep Jenn, only because you don’t know next when Joe will be vulnerable to be voted off.

Everyone in general and Shirin in particular, makes the right move, and Joe goes home. While I acknowledge that it was the smart decision, particularly for Shirin, I REALLY don’t like Jenn very much anymore, and I was warming up to Joe strategically. Plus, he created a lot of conflict for the alliances. Still, I suppose this opens up new possibilities. Joe, you will be missed. Not one of the greatest of time (continuing the “Survivor Philippines” comparison, he was Malcolm Freberg lite, only with less strategic game), but for this season, you will be missed.

It’s hard to pin down whether or not this was a good episode or not. Shirin came into her own strategically. That’s good. But Jenn was whiny and wanted to quit. That’s bad. But it was a smart, unpredictable vote. That’s good. But it left the whiny quitter in the game. That’s bad. But it comes with a free frogurt. That’s good. The frogurt is cursed. That’s bad. Ok, at this point I’m just copying an episode of “The Simpsons”, so better rap this up. I really am coming around to like Shirin, particularly strategically, but Jenn just really dragged down the episode. I’d say the good and the bad break about even, and this was just ok. Hopefully, Jenn goes next episode, and we can get on enjoying our season.
-Matt
Title Credit to Jean Storrs.

Idol Speculation: “Survivor Worlds Apart” Episode 7: Cleared Lines

In this episode, everything changes. Oh, I don’t mean the alliances or anything like that at all. That vote goes down pretty much along the lines established last week. But still, pretty much everything else gets upended. Not only does this season transition from being a character season to a (mostly) strategic season, but it manages to show us something that even the beloved “Survivor Cagayan” could not bring us: a power dynamic beyond a simple ingroup/outgroup conflict.

But I’m getting ahead of myself. Our episode starts where most of them do, with the tribe, now the merged tribe (I refuse to acknowledge that such a stupid merge name exists), coming back from Tribal Council. For once, though, it’s very positive, and a quick look at the results from last episode explains why. Jenn and Joe’s alliance can be happy because of their victory in the previous episode. However, while it’s better than Jenn getting voted out for them, they’re still on the bottom. Yes, Kelly is a loss to the Blue-Collar alliance, but in the end, nothing changes. They still have a majority, albeit a slightly slimmer one, and can therefore still be comfortable around camp. In such a situation, it is better to be happy rather than to cause conflict. Plus, since the jury will likely start soon, currying favor with those who will be on it is not a bad thing. To this end, Mike does a very good job cozying up to the people who just voted out his ally. I give him a lot of credit for this. True, I just said that’s the smart thing to do, but just because it’s smart doesn’t make it easy. Not everyone can pull it off, but Mike does very well.

Less happy about the outcome of Tribal Council is Rodney, but that could just be because he’s never happy. You’ll recall that he thought of Kelly as HIS number 1 ally, and therefore is upset at her going. Rather than take it out on Jenn, who, having played the idol, is pretty much the ONLY reason Kelly is gone, Rodney takes it out on Mike. Why? How did Mike possibly cause this? I suppose you could make the argument that Mike could have stuck with Hali instead, and therefore should have trusted Will, but to be fair, given that Will was pretty obviously tight with the other former Nagarote, it’s understandable why he wouldn’t be trustworthy. As to the idol thing, how was Mike supposed to have figured it out? Jenn was very good at keeping quiet about her idol, and you didn’t have a large enough majority to split the vote effectively, so no, I don’t agree that it’s Mike’s fault. Rodney once again does a lot of threatening, but does not deliver, instead leaning back on his “Final 7” Deal with Will and Carolyn, now throwing Tyler into the mix now that Kelly is gone.

Jenn, meanwhile, continues to gloat about her idol play, which I suppose she’s earned at this point. I bring this up as its own paragraph, though, because she says something here that I feel is worth commenting on. Jenn explains to us that she really just likes mixing things up in this game because it’s fun. I bring this up because it invites the comparison to “Chaos Kass” McQuillen of “Survivor Cagayan”. Readers of this blog will remember that Kass was one of my favorites from that season, and while I didn’t always think her strategy was wise, I did at least respect it. However, I do not respect Jenn’s gameplay, and this is for one key difference between the two. True, Kass did things purely to shake things up, but rather than do it for the fun of it, she did it only when she thought she was in danger. Whether this was a smart time for her to do it or not is debateable, but the fact remains that she never did it solely because it was “fun”. Jenn, rather than care too much about strategy, just does things for “fun”. In one sense, this is a shame, because Jenn has shown that, when push comes to shove, she has good strategic chops. However, at this point and again later in the episode, Jenn makes clear her contempt for people who take the strategic game seriously. I can understand believing that one shouldn’t take “Survivor” as a whole seriously, as it can be cheesy at times. As I’ve said before, though, the strategy part of the game has earned the right to be taken seriously, yet Jenn, for whatever reason, has nothing but contempt for it. It just frustrates me to no end that on what I’m calling a slightly-above-average season at this point has this person on it who has open contempt for the game! ARRGH! I know I’ve been on this rant before, so I’ll end it here, but suffice to say, this episode does nothing to change my opinion of Jenn.

Morning shows us that Rodney does not hold bad blood only with Mike. After a shot of a ton of food being prepared (what happened to the days of starvation?), we find out from Rodney that the former Nagarote have become the food police of the merged tribe. We are then treated to a scene where he and Shirin argue about the preparation of some sort of fruit. Insanity meets Irritability. Boy, this is going to be a fun argument. It doesn’t really amount to anything, apart from explaining part of why Rodney hasn’t gone into open rebellion against Mike at this point, but it’s not exactly a moment that’s fun to watch.

Thankfully, we quickly move past this unpleasant scene and get to our reward challenge. It’s a fairly standard one. Tribe members must cross a personal balance beam, untying bags of puzzle pieces along the way, and dropping them off one at a time. The first three to get all three bags across move on to the finals, where they have to solve an anchor puzzle to win a ziplining and pizza reward. As I say, this is a fairly standard challenge, its origins dating back to “Survivor Guatemala”. Still, as iterations of this challenge go, it’s a good one. The balance beam is one of the more jagged styles, which is more interesting to look at (though I take umbrage with the stairs at the end making it too easy), and I personally LOVE the production design on the puzzle. One of the few problems I have with more recent “Survivor” seasons is how a lot of the challenge elements look too neat and tidy. For want of a better term, they look plastic. Thus, when you have an anchor puzzle that genuinely looks textured with rust, it warms my heart. Definitely not one of the challenge greats, but for the first reward challenge with a lot of people, it’s ok. Plus, it’s not a team challenge with gives it a thumbs-up from me.

Our final three come down to Hali, Joe, and Mike. Not too surprised by Hali or Joe, they both seem fairly fit and like they’d have good balance, but Mike, while physically competent, seems a bit top-heavy. Still, with challenges like these, it comes down to the puzzle, meaning Mike is toast compared to these two. To his credit, though, he puts up a good effort, and once he manages to stop panicking on the puzzle, he actually gives Joe a run for his money. Despite this, Joe does end up winning, the obvious conclusion, and ends up getting to take four people on reward of him, though we’re told about this by first having him take a group of three, and then one extra person. Surprisingly, Joe actually thinks ahead, and takes the swing votes first. In this case, he takes Will, Carolyn, and Tyler, all of which I agree with. Will needs to be brought back into the fold, and if you want a solid majority, Tyler and Carolyn must be wooed. It’s Joe’s last pick that causes problems. With the swing votes out of the way, you want to pander to your alliance. This means that Joe should pick either Hali, Jenn, or Shirin. If it was me, I’d pick Hali, just because you could justify it on the grounds that she made the finals of the challenge. But Shirin pleads superfan status, and this takes her on the reward. First of all, since when did being a fan of “Survivor” entitle you to rewards? Furthermore, Shirin, of those three possibilities, is the WORST person to bring along with you. Carolyn has made clear her dislike of Shirin, and since Tyler goes along with Carolyn, you want to appeal to them both. Bringing along the person they dislike the most does NOT appeal to them! Now, you could argue that Joe is trying to use the fundamental attribution error to his advantage. The excitement of the reward might be transferred to the liking of Shirin, but given how deep the hate is, that’s a bit of a stretch. Better to take Jenn or Hali.

Even so, the reward seems pleasant enough. A lot of standard confessionals about how beautiful and life-changing it was. The only sour note of the reward itself was Shirin, who argued with one of the instructors and made known that Carolyn’s dislike of her was mutual. Shirin, I want to like you, I really do. I keep trying to emphasize your good points. But not being the bigger person here is really making that hard.

Enough complaining! There’s doubtless and idol clue to be found. Or in this case, to be in plain sight such that it forces some cooperation. The idol clue this time is uniquely hidden in a bottle of soda that Carolyn has. Carolyn somehow does NOT notice the cylindrical silhouette in her bottle, and simply hands it off to Joe. Joe HAD noticed the silhouette, and managed to pull it off nonchalantly by asking for the rest, since Carolyn had determined that she didn’t like the soda. However, Joe unwisely tries to drink the clue, but still somehow manages to only be found out by Tyler. This leads to one of the better scenes in the episode, where Tyler pretends to have a fake spat about Joe’s manners, and they agree they’ll need to “talk about it later”, which is nice doublespeak about the idol. When this season actually decides to be subtle, it does it very well. Perhaps there’s hope yet.

The next morning, or not even, judging by the gray, Joe and Tyler get up to read the clue together. Although they appear very diligent in looking out for any potential witnesses, Mike still manages to fool them, and follows along. He waits until they’re done reading, and then comes out right after them. Tyler, however, is not an idiot, and realizes that Mike probably saw, or at least suspects, what they were doing. Smartly not wanting to be on the outside of the numbers, Tyler comes clean to Mike about the clue, which basically says the idol is in a tree by a tributary. All seems good, until Mike and everyone else realizes that Joe is off on his own. Scrambling ensues, but Mike eventually comes across Joe, idol-less, and tails him to ensure that Joe does not get the idol. In a good bit of forward thinking, though, Mike decides to act as if Joe does have the idol to the rest of the camp. It’s actually a really good strategy. There is no such thing as a “neutral” reaction to the idol, much like there is never a “neutral” choice offered on “Survivor”. Take note, So. Therefore, the person with the idol is either your best friend or the next to go. Using the fear of an idol, even one that doesn’t exist, is a good and fairly original strategy to prevent alliances. True, we’ve had false rumors get people evicted before, so it’s not ENTIRELY original, but for this season’s strategic game, I’ll take what I can get. While this season has been improving strategically, it has yet to give us anything truly new. This comes close, though, and I’m ecstatic for it! The other downside to this strategy is that the threat of having an idol could actually make people WANT to align with Joe, so there’s some backfire potential. However, with the right spin (which Mike puts on it), it could be the nail in Joe’s coffin, and Joe is polite enough to help the strategy along. He swears to everyone who will listen that he has no idol, which of course only arouses people suspicious even more. Score one for Mike.

Make that score TWO for Mike! Correctly surmising that once Joe is out of the mix he’ll be the next biggest threat, Mike wants an idol of his own, as a safety net. After a token effort at searching (which for some reason involves him impersonating a monkey) he finds it. Good for him, though his “happy dance” annoys me. Yes, getting an idol is a good thing, and I get expressing your emotions, but it just felt a bit over the top somehow.

Speaking of over-the-top, we need our requisite scenes of Sound-Byte Dan for the episode! Oh goody, a double-feature! Sound-Byte Dan talking with Shirin, whose name he can’t pronounce! Yay! Actually, in fairness it starts out ok. Sound-Byte Dan actually seems like he’s trying to bring Shirin into their alliance, emphasizing that they’re both fans, and reemphasizing that she’s in the minority. This being Sound-Byte Dan, though, it quickly devolves into nothing less than unpleasant name-calling. Sound-Byte Dan insults her math skills, calls her stupid, just generally belittles her in every way that Sound-Byte Dan seems programed to do. To her credit, Shirin lets it all flow off of her back, but seeing a scene of two characters the audience doesn’t like interact is not one we want to see, for whatever reason. It also sends Sound-Byte Dan even lower in my estimation, as a lot of his talk was mean-spirited, and frankly, I’m amazed he found a WAY to get lower in my estimation.

Challenge Time! And yes, while not the most original challenge, this one does have a lot of good elements. It’s basically a bunch of slide puzzles, which have been around since “Survivor Thailand”, but with a twist. Normally, the goal of slide puzzles is either to remove a block, or complete a picture. Good in and of themselves, but what if you had BOTH? This challenge has contestants move one singular piece through three separate slide puzzles (inserting it anew each time), before putting it into the final puzzle, which must form a picture. The first one to do so wins immunity. While this is a small challenge with a fair number of reused elements, I always like puzzles, and I just LOVE the element of using one piece throughout the entire thing. It makes it seem like one big connected puzzle rather than a race through a series of smaller puzzles.

Before we can get to the awesome challenge, though, we need a pointless scene of Shirin and Jeff looking ridiculous posing while Shirin talks about how this challenge is right up her alley. Um, Shirin, I get that physical challenges aren’t your thing, but must I remind you of the immunity challenge in the first episode? The one where you single-handedly lost it for your tribe on the puzzle? Yeah, I wouldn’t say puzzles are a strength on your end either.

Joe ends up winning, despite a major effort from Sound-Byte Dan, proving that this season really is starved for good puzzle solvers. Don’t get me wrong, Joe’s no dummy, but he’s not the stuff of puzzle legend. The trouble is that, compared with everyone else here, in terms of puzzles he’s a genius. This, combined with his physical prowess, means than an immunity streak on his end is really the only shot his alliance has of winning this game. Rodney wastes no time in pointing out that, had they gone with his plan and voted out Joe instead of Joaquin, they wouldn’t be in this situation. Much as it pains me to admit, he has a point. However, hindsight is 20/20, and I stand by my earlier statement that, at the time, voting out Joaquin was the best move.

Back at the camp, Shirin expresses her disappointment at the fact that she likely won’t get to win even one challenge, which is a goal of hers. Still, she consoles herself with the fact that sucking at challenges makes her less of a threat. Cue scene of the dominant alliance talking about voting off Shirin!

Actually, what happens with the dominant alliance is a bit unclear. There is talk about who to vote off, and Shirin’s name is the one brought up the most for being annoying, but no consensus is reached. Mike is fairly adamant that it should be Hali, to break up that power couple, but says that if the consensus is Shirin, he’ll go with it. Sound-Byte Dan, meanwhile, is concerned about idols, but admits that it seems likely that Shirin does not have it (he calls her too dumb to lie, which does not help his case in my book), and never comes up with a plan to do anything about it.

Far more interesting is the conversation that happens next. The women, save for Carolyn, all talk about how much they hate Sound-Byte Dan, a topic I’m sure comes up daily. They decide then and there to form a women’s alliance, bringing in Tyler since, after last episode, the women are down one person, but the real swing vote is Sierra. Yeah, she’s decided to actually show up this episode. Apart from the obvious reason of “Sound-Byte Dan is annoying”, she says that the power couple of Mike and Sound-Byte Dan needs to be broken up, and that a women’s alliance would require a man going next, which, since Joe is immune, is not likely to happen by sticking with Mike. Now, jumping ahead a bit, Sierra does NOT go with this plan, so I could see it as entirely pointless, yet it’s one of the highlights of this episode. Why? Because it gives us a VIABLE idea (Rodney’s “alliance” does not count) that this won’t just turn into two teams duking it out. True, there was some variability in “Survivor Cagayan”, but for the most part, it was group A vs. group B. Don’t get me wrong, that can be interesting, but it’s also better when alliances and sub-alliances keep shifting. This scene inspires in me confidences that this won’t just be a matter of two opposing forces fighting for dominance, as we often see, but individuals organizing and reorganizing to win. It’s why I say this episode shifts into a mostly strategic mode, and I love it!

Tribal Council is a fairly exciting affair, dampened only by my certainty that this will be the episode that breaks the unpredictability streak. We have no other viable options, so say “Adios!” to Sound-Byte Dan! Still, Sound-Byte Dan has the time to provide us with, you guessed it, more sound-bytes! Specifically, he gives the old line of “flippers never win”, which is immediately outed by Shirin as simple scare tactics to keep his alliance intact. She also cites Tony Vlachos (“Survivor Cagayan”) as an example, which is pretty accurate, though I would cite Parvati Shallow’s strategy on “Survivor Micronesia” as a better example, or even Chris Daugherty of “Survivor Vanuatu”. Sadly, this leads into Hali’s historical comparison, centered around of the name of the merged tribe, which I refuse to type again. In any case, she cites the history of the U.S. as rewarding flippers, as we supposedly “flipped” away from Britain. I take umbrage with this comparison, and not just because it cites that dumb tribe name again. “Flipping” implies going to another side, but the U.S. basically went to its own side. It may have BETRAYED Britain, depending on how you look at it, but it did not FLIP from Britain. For that matter, Benedict Arnold flipped, and he’s one of the most reviled men in American History. So no, Hali, you are wrong, please leave my Tribal.

As the contestants go to vote, I must admit that while it’s a near guarantee that Sound-Byte Dan is going, I don’t think it’s the smart move. There’s logic behind the reasons for people to flip, but I keep coming back to the Joe/Jenn/Hali threesome. Left alone, they’re too big of a threat to ignore, and as they definitely have Shirin and probably have Will, it’s safe to say that tonight’s the last night to get rid of them. Still, this is the season of surprises, and the surprise here is that the smart move is made, the old alliances are stuck with, and Hali is sent home. In one sense, I’m disappointed, as it means that nothing has changed alliance-wise, but once again, the season fooled me, and let’s face it, Hali brought nothing to the table. Sound-Byte Dan we can at least enjoy despising. Sorry, Hali, but you will not be missed. Join the ranks of the forgotten post-merge people. Kelly of “Survivor Samoa” will be your inpatient counselor.

I should hate this episode. A person with little screentime went, making it feel undeserved, and we got a lot of talk about rebellion, but no action. But it feels promising, the wool was once again successfully pulled over my eyes, and I’m liking how the season is developing away from character and more towards strategy. True, it probably won’t be among the great strategic seasons, but it’s moving above decent, and that’s enjoyable in and of itself. See you next week, when my hatred of Jenn may prove justified!
-Matt
Title Credit to Jean Storrs.

Idol Speculation: “Survivor Worlds Apart” Episode 6: Lex Van Den Berghe Wins it All!

Ok, got to give the producers credit where credit is due: When they said they would do a twist “They’d been wanting to do for a while” and that would be original and game-changing, they weren’t kidding. I mean sure, we’ve seen returnees in the game before, it’s true. But adding one in the middle of the season, thus increasing the probability that the returnee will win? Genius. Sheer genius. Now, given my hatred of the advantage returnees have against new players, coupled with the fact that returnees have been more and more common since “Survivor Nicaragua”, you’d think that I would hate this twist. But Lex Van Den Berghe (“Survivor Africa”) is the rare combination of character and strategist that I love to watch. Also, it’s been 11 years since he’s been on, and a year and a half since we’ve had returnees, so those objections are out the window. Does he have an unfair advantage? Sure, but he’s something the season really needed, and the show has the good grace to come to the inevitable conclusion early, so we can stop wasting time with what would become a predictable season, and just enjoy what we got from “Survivor Worlds Apart”, and gear up for the next season. Not to say that this episode was boring of course. It held up as well as other merge episodes. Some great moments. Some cringe-worthy moments. But all in all, a solid episode that was a good finish to a good season. Let’s take a look at what will be one of the shortest finale blogs ever.

Not being a show to stand on tradition, “Survivor” starts us back off at the current Escameca, where, just like their last Tribal Council, damage control is in order. This time, however, it’s Rodney and not Sierra who requires consolation (evidently they don’t care about how Tyler feels). Mike continues to improve in my eyes by learning from his mistakes. Specifically, in order to win Rodney back, he takes him as far away from Sound-Byte Dan as possible. This is precisely the right idea. Once he’s sure that the moronic social graces of Sound-Byte Dan will not interfere, Mike spins a good yarn about how Joaquin was only playing Rodney, and Mike just wanted Rodney to not be hoodwinked. This is one of the best lies I’ve ever heard on the show, not only because it absolves Mike of guilt in the blindside with regards to Rodney, but simultaneously helps to bring Rodney back into the fold, assuming he buys it. For the most part, Rodney does, but still can’t help but be confrontational. He claims that he had info and connections from Joaquin that he can’t use now, and gets mad at Mike. The two seem to work out their differences, but Rodeny admits, true to his nature, that he’s still out for revenge. I’ll talk about this a lot later, but suffice to say that Rodney’s revenge plotting is one of the few low points of the episode.

Nagarote has also been up to some interesting things. Getting Tree Mail, for example! The note is fairly vague, mentioning a feast and needing to work together. It’s vague enough to get debate going about whether or not this is a merge, but once the consensus that it is comes down, loyalties start to get questioned. Particularly, Kelly’s loyalty is questioned, as she has the largest majority to go back to. In a good bit of lying, she swears up and down that she’s loyal to the new tribe, claiming that the old Escameca excluded her. Privately, though, she reaffirms what we saw last episode: she’s with the old Escameca to the end.

Our tribes march off to their fate, and Rodney is quick to note that Jeff Probst is not present at whatever they’re going to. A stroke of observational genius I would not have expected from him. He also says that this proves to him that it’s a merge. Don’t be too sure on that, Rodney. True, that’s a logical conclusion, but you never know on “Survivor”. They might have brought back the Probst-less challenges from “Survivor Samoa” and “Survivor One World”. Sure, those were pretty big flops on their respective seasons, but I think people underestimate their value, as well as the willingness of the show to force any idea into the game. The problem with Probst-less challenges, it seems to me, is not in concept but in execution. They just haven’t had the right cast to make the concept work really well. With how many characters we have on this cast, I’d say this would be a good season to try it out on.

No, Rodney is correct, and the tribes have merged, but with a twist! Yes, like I hinted at earlier, in a never-before-seen move (at this phase in the game), the producers have brought back former fan favorite Lex Van Den Berghe of “Survivor Africa”. MAN, is it good to see him! I’ve been giving this cast a hard time, and they’re not as bad as I made out, but Lex, combining the best features of the “Survivor” players I like to watch the most, is a real sight for sore eyes. A few of the cast, notably Carolyn and Rodney, are a bit wary of him, but Shirin, after excitedly reading out the merge note, greets him with open arms, as does most of the case. Beyond this exciting new direction for the show to take, we get our new merge buffs. Much like last season, it’s pretty hard to tell what color they are, though at least it’s a distinguishable color from our previous tribes. The base of it seems to be black, but the highlights on the sides, as well as the text for everyone’s name seems to be purple. Either one could work, I suppose, but I’m going to go with purple, mainly because black at this point is an overdone merge color, and it’s been slightly longer since we’ve seen purple merge buffs.

Lex’s getting integrated questions lead to the obvious question of “Why Joaquin?” Mike pretty much tells the truth, that he was getting too tight with some people, but this leads to a good strategic moment out of Carolyn. She notes that power couples are quick to be broken up in this particular season, and so, since she and Tyler are tight, they need to not be seen as a couple. While I would have liked more evidence of the bond between her and Tyler beyond just the first episode, this is still a really good bit of strategizing on her part. While I still think she’s a bit judgmental, I cannot deny that she can pull out a good strategic nugget when she wants to.

We find out that the merge is the old Escameca camp, which does make sense. They won the most challenges and got the most people to the merge. By any objective measure, they earned the right to be the home camp. When they get there, however, we find the… OTHER twist of the merge. Their shelter has been completely destroyed, and needs to be rebuilt. Um, ok. Nothing really comes of it, but ok. If this is the “twist you’ve been wanting to do for a while”, it’s pretty underwhelming. As I say, it creates no real drama, and on top of that, it’s not even original. You did the same thing on “Survivor Fiji”! And there you did it better, because you took away their rewards! Here, we see that the chickens at least got to be kept, and presumably the other rewards are around somewhere as well. Pretty much a half-baked rehash of a previous twist. Very underwhelming there, CBS.

Fortunately, we’ve got bog-standard post-merge strategizing to fall back on. It very quickly becomes apparent that it’s turning into a “Blue Collar v. No Collar” thing, with, sure enough, the minority stuck in the middle for a swing vote. Same song and dance that we’ve seen on many other seasons. Even so, it’s a story that remains really fun to watch, and usually gives us a few good strategic moments. This particular iteration does not disappoint. Mike admits that in order for the plan to work, he needs Rodney on board, and so once again sets about making good with him. Once again, Rodney agrees to go along with it, but this time does slightly more than just rant about revenge. In what seems like an amazingly patient move for the normally impulsive Rodney, he makes a sub-alliance with Carolyn, Kelly, and oddly, Will of all people. The other two I can kind of get. Not sure what makes you think you have Kelly, but she’s not an unreasonable alliance-mate. But why Will? I know Will is our “Nobody but me” person for the season, but it’s pretty clear that the original Nagarote are sticking together. What in your little deluded mind makes you think that Will is with you at all? Not surprisingly, smart people like Carolyn see through Rodney’s blatant ruse, and so come up with strategies of their own. Specifically, she talks with Tyler, and the two agree to keep up a partnership, but to stay separate in the eyes of the tribe, in order to avoid being seen as a threat. See this Rodney? This is good strategy. You should learn from it.

Sub alliances are not good enough for Carolyn, though. Putting aside her biases, as she really doesn’t trust either side, she turns to the only other unaffiliated group from her old Masaya Tribe: Lex. Yes, Lex uses this leverage to pull together a mixed alliance of the misfits. The old Masaya are a given, since they want to be the majority in any tribe. Sierra is easy to pull in since she pretty much hates everybody in her old alliance. The old Nagarote are harder to crack, but Lex, in a brilliant move, puts paranoia about the Jenn/Hali connection into the minds of Joe and Will. This gets the two of them over to his side. Now THIS is masterful gameplay! Completely see why the handed the game to Lex this episode.

Meanwhile, Mike reaffirms his bond with Kelly. She’s pretty quick to turn back to his side, but this move does not go unnoticed by the new Nagarote. Jenn quickly and rightly concludes that they can’t trust Kelly, and therefore will need to pull in both Lex and Tyler to ensure a majority. Not bad strategy. Doesn’t mean I like Jenn any more than I did previously, though.

Of course, this merge is missing one thing. Something crucial. Something every merge worth its salt needs to have. Yes, it’s time for the “Lex is Paranoid” segment. I like Lex, and think he’s underrated in a lot of ways, but part of why I like him is that he’s NOT right all the time. His paranoid episodes are a joy to watch, and this is no exception. Here, after getting away from Shirin’s fangirling (which he’s also a bit afraid of), he comes across Hali, and so he strikes up a conversation with her, opportunist that he is. However, Hali is so vacuous and non-responsive, that Lex can only figure it’s a put-on. “She must be a strategic genius,” he reasons, “who’s putting on this show to vote me off” Lex kicks his plans into overdrive, communing with Carolyn to have her play along with Mike’s plans for now. That way, Lex himself can avoid being a target by aggravating the “Blue Collar v. No Collar” conflict, and keep his sub-alliance intact, assuming Joe wins immunity. More on that later. A pretty good move by Lex, but then, as I say, it’s always fun to watch him strategize after getting paranoid.

I suppose they’re also missing a tribe name. Mike comes up with “Merica”.

No really, what’s the tribe name? I mean, we’ve had terrible tribe names in the past, but just naming the tribe after your home country, and doing so in a way that’s pretty much only an internet meme? That’s got to be the dumbest idea I’ve ever heard.

No, sadly, I’m not mistaken. Mike really wants to name the tribe “Merica”. No one openly objects, because the name of the tribe is not something worth making waves socially over, but Shirin points out, and I agree, that that is probably the DUMBEST tribe name ever. Lex also points this out, but he’s less vocal about it. At least the stupid “Combine the names of the individual tribes” idea pays SOME homage to the area you’re in, or some facet of the social game. This… this is just pandering to the lowest common denominator! Even Mike’s justification makes no sense. He claims that it’s because of the collars twist, being “Red, White, and Blue”, but that’s illogical. If you’re going by the prefixes on the collars, the colors are “Blue, White, and No” (No is a color because I said so), and if you’re going by the previous tribe colors, it’s “Red, White, and Yellow”. Evidently I used the “Top 5 and Bottom 5 Dumb Tribe Names List” too early. THIS has got to take the number one spot as dumbest merged tribe name in the history of everything! Oy vey. I really do like Mike, but this is one facet of him I can’t stand.

Speaking of Mike, we, for whatever reason, need yet ANOTHER scene of Mike trying to keep Rodney in the fold, only for Rodney to talk about how he hasn’t forgotten Mike’s betrayal, and has his own plans. Ok, this is what I meant about the “Rodney’s Revenge” plot being the low point of the episode: IT DOESN’T GO ANYWHERE! I mean sure, you can argue that it’s building up for future episodes, but since Lex wins this episode, we know it won’t. And even if there WERE to be more episodes, the fact remains that Rodney’s plans are so half-baked that I can’t take them seriously. I was expecting REAL revenge, Rodney shaking things up and causing some chaos, not this crud. It’s really just a major disappointment, and while I wouldn’t say DON’T include Rodney talking about his revenge”, we didn’t need three separate scenes of a plotline that goes nowhere.

History repeats itself, as Sound-Byte Dan comes out of the water with some sort of foot injury, just like Max did a few episodes ago. As before, he’s immediately accosted by Jenn, who once again advises him to stick his foot in hot water. Sound-Byte Dan, however, has learned from the mistakes of Max, and therefore does everything in his power to avoid sticking his foot in the pot. Everything except take up Shirin’s eager offer to pee on his foot, a la Kathy Vavrick-O’Brien (“Survivor Marquesas”). Despite his best efforts, Jenn will not be denied the sticking of men’s feet in hot water, and Sound-Byte Dan goes to do so, with little consequence. Though we do get more sound-bytes out of him. Yay.

For today’s immunity challenge, we get what’s fast becoming a “Survivor” tradition for the first post-merge immunity challenge. Everyone must cling to a post with ruts cut in it for footholds. You fall, you’re out. Last person on the pole wins immunity. A pretty standard challenge, overdone but challenging, and I’m willing to forgive it on the grounds of it being a semi-”Survivor” tradition.

Right before the challenge, we get a clip of Mike saying how Joe really needs to be the one to get voted out, due to being a leader and a challenge threat. Gee, I wonder who’s going to win immunity?

With regards to this season’s individual immunity idol: I don’t get it. It’s mostly a necklace with bits of seashell and plant from the area. A bit generic, but nothing wrong with it. My problem is that the centerpiece is a compass. Don’t get me wrong, we’ve seen that that motif can work on seasons like “Survivor Cook Islands”, but that was because the season as a whole had a nautical motif. Where has there been any nautical motifs this season? Don’t get wrong, it’s not a terrible idol, but it just raises too many questions for me to like it.

One thing I don’t get about this challenge, though: Why does ANYBODY wear shoes? True, I suppose your feet would be slightly more comfortable, but shoes would also make it harder to get a foothold, and would therefore be a serious disadvantage. This challenge has been done a lot of times before, you’d think people would remember these things! Also, I take a bit of an issue with Probst saying that “Three men and Three women have won this challenge”. Not that he’s technically incorrect, but he’s counting the times this challenge was done as a “Redemption Island” duel, which I do not for these statistics. Not everyone got to participate (in particular, one of the “Man” wins had ONLY men participating, so it isn’t fair to count it, in my book), so it shouldn’t count. But even not counting those, the score is even 2 v. 2, so I guess this will be something of a tiebreaker.

After a few good spills and some delightful rain, it comes down to a battle between Lex, Carolyn, and Joe. Lex steps down out of politeness (his not being starved gave him an advantage), and Carolyn eventually fell, leading Joe to win immunity. Not that exciting, but probably the worst thing possible for Mike’s alliance.

As you might expect, chaos soon erupts between the two factions back at the camp. Mike’s coalition is pretty much united in the fact that, now that Joe has immunity, Jenn is the next target. They don’t talk much about the possibility of Jenn having a hidden immunity idol, but in fairness to them, there’s not really a way for them to know that, and very little they could do even if they did. Even so, Mike and Sound-Byte Dan are concerned about Rodney’s influence on Will. Yes, we’ve come to the point where Sound-Byte Dan, one of the most annoying people on the season, and one of the least likely to win, is partly calling the shots. Even though that storyline was somewhat underdeveloped, it’s still fascinating, and an example of one of the great things the season has given us. They agree to get Rodney on board with a plan to have Will vote for Hali, and the rest vote for Jenn, to test his loyalty risk free. An ok plan, but I’m surprised Rodney agrees to it, since it wasn’t his idea. Maybe he really is trying to lay low. Still, Will is bugging me here. I get wanting to consider all options and play both sides. But why does Will actually go along with their plan? You’ve got a united four who want to take you with them. DON’T QUSTION IT UNLESS YOU CAN GET A BETTER DEAL! WHICH YOU DON’T HAVE!

Ugh, anyway, Lex’s coalition decides to lay low for the moment, so it’s off to Jenn’s coalition, which opts to go for, oddly, Kelly. Ok, I get that she betrayed you, and she’s fairly physically fit, but why her over Mike. Best to get the big man out early, particularly since he’s what’s holding the alliance together. Kelly’s not a bad play, but Mike’s a better one. Anyway, Jenn tells Hali about her idol for no reason (refer to my earlier rants about telling people you have the idol for my reaction to this), but does hint that she might play the idol if she believes she’s in danger, which is fairly good misdirection.

Thus, it all comes down to Carolyn and Tyler, the swing votes (Shirin having sworn loyalty to the new Nagarote). Both are on the fence, and Mike doesn’t do the best job of selling his alliance to Tyler. It seems like they’re leaning towards Nagarote, but there’s enough misdirection to make me believe they could be going the Escameca route at least. In any case, I’d say it’s the better move. With Joe immune, it keeps the Lex alliance intact, and I’d argue that between Rodney and Sierra, it’s an alliance that will be easier to break. The season still keeps up its string of unpredictable votes, though, so props there.

Tribal itself is a thoroughly enjoyable affair, getting a good mix of strategy with humor. Will jokes about voting Probst out, which actually happened on “Survivor Borneo”, but did not make air. Tyler and Sound-Byte Dan give us captivating yet oddly terrifying metaphors involving ice picks and chainsaws in people’s back. And the crown jewel, Lex makes a few jokes around Rodney at the expense of “Boston Rob” Mariano (“Survivor Marquesas”). Bonus. But this is not to say that strategy is absent at Tribal. No, mixed in with the humor and jovial tone, people are hinting at the divide in the tribe, and what side they’ll take, without revealing everything. The subtlety is such that even the audience doesn’t know who’s going as we go to the vote, and we’re all on the edge of our seats. A stellar Tribal Council, if ever there was one.

Sure enough, Carolyn and Tyler make the smart decision and stick with Escameca. But Tribal Council is not without its surprises. Jenn, despite there being nothing that made her nervous to my ears, pulls out her idol. And a good thing, too, as otherwise she would have gone. See, THIS is why you needed to get rid of Mike. Don’t get me wrong, keeping your alliance intact is better than you going home, but the fact remains that with Mike, the glue of the alliance, still in the game, there’s no reason to suspect they won’t stick together after this. Unless you find another idol, all you’ve done is buy three more days. That’s always a good thing, of course, but it could be better.

While I did like Kelly, I can’t say she’s too great a loss. An underrated player, perhaps, but one who ultimately brought little to the game. Still, she will be remembered for her concussion, if nothing more.

The crown jewel of an episode is brought to its conclusion by Probst standing up and saying that by not voting out Lex, Lex is now guaranteed to win. Everyone agrees and, bowing to Lex’s superior strategy, awards him the prize money then and there. A high note to end the season on. It wasn’t as good as Probst said, mainly due to a few annoying characters and too much emphasis on the “Collars” twist, but it provided a lot of entertainment, a few nuggets of strategy, some possible good returnees, and a fantastic finale with a deserving, if unexpected, winner. The prophecy of the “Survivor All-Stars” DVD commentary has come true: Lex comes back into the game and wins everything.

Well, I guess that makes it the off-season. Look for more posts in the “’Survivor’ Retrospectives” series shortly, and I’ll see you in season 31. Of course, if for some reason they keep airing episodes of “Survivor Worlds Apart”, I’ll keep blogging them, but what are the odds of that? Lex won. Season over.

Happy April Fool’s Day!

-Matt
Title Credit to Jean Storrs.