“Survivor” What-Ifs?: Palau

Well, now that the 4th of July has passed in the US, thereby eliminating any sort of search-engine boost for topics relating to US history, let’s discuss the season that was steeped in US history, because that makes perfect sense!  Yes, if the title wasn’t clear, today we’re going to be making a small change to “Survivor Palau”.  As one of the more beloved and memorable seasons of the show, naturally we’re probably going to find some way to ruin it.  

As always, though, before we begin our deep dive, I should warn you that there are SPOILERS ahead.  Since we’re going to be discussing a change in the timeline, it’s going to be hard not to reference how things went down in our timeline.  In addition, changing the outcome of a season usually changes returnees in future seasons, so if you haven’t watched Palau, or any returnee seasons besides All-Stars, you may want to hold off on reading this blog until you do so.  With all that said, if you are still here, let’s dive into the change in question, shall we?

THE IMPACT

If you’re anything like me, you find that one of the funniest moments from Palau is at the final seven, where Stephenie, desperate to save herself, tries to form a women’s alliance, the women being up 4-3 at this point.  What is somewhat surprising is that this crack seems to start to open a bit, as both Katie and Jenn, Katie in particular, seem to start to consider the option.  Where everything falls apart is Caryn, who takes the information to Tom, thereby quashing any hope of such an alliance.  Or, as Katie memorably put it, “We can’t get a women’s alliance together because Caryn sucks.”

So, for this change, what if Caryn DIDN’T suck?  Or, to be more accurate, what if Caryn actually DID agree to join the women’s alliance?  This might seem like a stretch, since Caryn was openly not overly fond of Katie, but bear in mind, Caryn wasn’t overly fond of Tom either, finding him a bit authoritarian and condescending.  I guess it’s more accurate to say that Caryn wasn’t fond of pretty much anyone on her tribe (save Willard, but he’s long-gone by this point), and it was just a matter of who annoyed her most that particular day.  In this timeline, perhaps Tom was particularly overbearing that day, and so Caryn decided sticking in her lot with Katie was the better option.  

In this case, the women’s alliance not only happens, but takes out the man who, in our timeline, was the winner of the season.  Tom and Ian are the primary targets, and this change doesn’t prevent Ian from winning immunity this episode.  Thus Tom, the biggest target, goes down, and as you can imagine, that makes a great deal of difference on the rest of the season.  

THE FALLOUT

The problem the women’s alliance now faces is target availability.  In our timeline only Tom and Ian ever win immunity, and were pretty much each other’s only competition.  Gregg might have been able to put up something of a fight, but as a pretty distant third in every immunity challenge we saw, I don’t think it can be realistically said that he wins an immunity.  Thus, the women now have the issue that there’s nothing stopping Ian from winning immunity again and again.  

At first, this isn’t too bad, as there are fractures to be found in the alliance anyway.  While I feel like the women were willing to use Stephenie as a number, I don’t think they actually wanted to keep her around that long.  All of them were smart enough to realize she would decimate a jury, and thus not be a good endgame partner for them, particularly as, in the unlikely event that Ian and Gregg DO get eliminated, she’s now the biggest challenge threat left.  As such, if Ian wins immunity, I suspect Stephenie goes before Gregg.  Jenn was a savvy player, and while I don’t think she’d sacrifice her game for Gregg, it is fair to say that she realized that he was more of a number for her, and would be able to convince the women to turn on Stephenie.  

In exchange, Jenn probably has to promise to take Gregg out next, which most likely happens once Ian wins immunity again at five.  Then we come down to our final four, which is actually nearly the same as in our timeline, just substituting in Caryn for Tom.  This is where it gets tricky for the women, as again, I feel like Ian is a shoe-in to win every challenge from here on out.  If the women do fracture, Caryn is probably on the outs again, due to the whole “doesn’t really get along particularly well with anybody” thing.  Thus Ian, Jenn, and Katie are our final three, and once again, Ian wins, probably taking Katie to the end to prove his “loyalty” in the face of her “deception”.  

This, as one would expect, leads to an easy Ian victory.  I hesitate to say it’s 7-0 in Ian’s favor, as both Coby and Jenn would be wild cards in this case (the latter because Ian would have been personally responsible for her exit, the former because that’s just how he be), but I don’t see Katie scraping together 4 votes in any scenario against Ian.  Ironically, she has better arguments against him than she does against Tom in our timeline, but Ian now also has better arguments.  After all, he overcame a numbers deficit by an impressive 5-immunity streak, putting him in the same category as Colby Donaldson (“Survivor The Australian Outback”).  If that doesn’t lead to his victory with this jury, I don’t know what does.  

THE LEGACY

Since the change to this season has less of an effect on returnees for later seasons, we’ll start there.  While I do think Tom is still a big deal in this timeline, I doubt he ever gets the call to return again.  He’s still loved by many, and still a big hero, but without his improbable win, he’s basically another Hunter Ellis (“Survivor Marquesas”): Likable, but never going to win a game like “Survivor”.  His defeat would be considered inevitable, and thus not worth being brought back for, especially as the game focusses more and more heavily on strategy rather than survival.  In contrast, Ian probably takes his place on “Survivor Heroes vs. Villains”, and also probably gets brought back for “Survivor Winners at War”.  As to who he replaces there, I could see it being either Nick (due to Nick being one of the less well-remembered winners at the time, in spite of recency), or, to my regret, Ethan (due to he and Ethan being similar good-guy, not overly strategic character types).  

Of course, with a women’s alliance coming together, the women of this season get a lot more consideration as well, and for the better I say.  I’d normally say Jenn would be the most likely candidate for a return (i.e. I could see her taking Parvati’s spot on “Survivor Micronesia”), as she’s a young, attractive strategist, an archetype the show loves.  Unfortunately, tragedy gets in the way.  For you newer fans who may be unaware, Jenn was diagnosed with breast cancer about a year after “Survivor Palau”, a battle that she sadly lost around the time of “Survivor Heroes vs. Villains”, though she did at least live long enough to attend the 10th anniversary party, where she was able to say her goodbyes to a lot of her friends from the show.  Much as I would LIKE to change this outcome, the fact remains that there’s no realistic way to do so.  As such, I doubt her health allows her to return.  

Katie, on the other hand, definitely comes back at some point, now being seen as the person who really pushed for the women’s alliance to better her own game, and not just out of necessity as Stephenie did.  I don’t think Katie takes Parvati’s spot on Micronesia, as Jenn likely would have, and I don’t see Katie doing enough to earn a spot on Heroes vs. Villains.  Caramoan would seem a possibility, and I don’t doubt she’d be an alternate for that, but at that point unless Corinne said “No” to returning, I’m not sure who she replaces.  No, Katie, and by extension Caryn, have the best shot at returning on “Survivor Cambodia”, where I don’t doubt both of them are on the Second Chance ballot, probably replacing the likes of Mikayla and Stephanie.  Whether they get on, I’m not sure.  If Caryn doesn’t get on, I suspect her ship has sailed, but even if Katie doesn’t return, I’d imagine they bring her back for Game Changers at long last, taking either Hali or Sierra’s place.  

For all my cynicism at the top of this blog, the truth is that an Ian win probably doesn’t do that much to change how beloved the season was.  True, we lose the “Hero leader overcomes odds to win” storyline we got with a Tom victory, but it does get replaced with “Underdog nice guy immunities his way to the end”, which is almost as good and improbable, so the season doesn’t lose much there.  If you really want to split hairs, I would say the former storyline is probably more amazing, so perhaps the season loses a BIT of luster, but in exchange, I think it holds up better in the long run.  Despite this being, as I said, a fan-favorite season, Rob Has a Podcast has been doing a countdown of all the seasons, with Palau coming in 18th.  More than respectable, to be sure, but not this “Top Tier Season” it was seen as at the time.  The problem with Palau is that what makes it great, mainly the unlikely outcomes we see such as Ulong losing every immunity challenge and Tom winning, work well for a first-time watch, but when you rewatch and know they’re coming, they’re a lot less exciting.  Without mystery, the inevitable outcome is lessened in impact.  Here, however, Koror actually DOES shake things up post-merge, thereby giving you something interesting to look forward to.  Palau may not be as beloved in the moment in this timeline, but it ends up holding up much better to the test of time.  That said, physical threats become even more of a target than they already are in subsequent seasons.  After all, an Ian victory in this scenario proves that, if left unchecked, they CAN immunity their way to the end.  

In my opinion, though, the big impact here is on women’s alliances.  This is something that’s been discussed since the beginning of “Survivor”, being literally brought up in the first episode of “Survivor Borneo”, and even being openly discussed as recently as “Survivor Island of the Idols”.  Doubtless it will come up again, but I think the failure of the women’s alliance here to produce a female winner will trigger renewed discussion on this topic.  The problem here is timing.  While women’s alliances are not an unusual discussion on the show, they don’t necessarily pop up as often as one might think.  However, with a women’s alliance coming together on Palau, we now have two seasons right in a row with prominent women’s alliances, both of which went down in flames to a guy, since Vanuatu is unchanged in this timeline.  Hence, there’s probably a lot of discussion around “Can a women’s alliance truly stick it out?”, and more to the point, makes them a lot more likely to show up, since a lot of women on the show will have something to prove.  They’ll want to show they CAN stick it out against the men.  I still think we won’t get one that fully works out until Micronesia, but the discussion comes up more, and I think Guatemala, despite not having a formal women’s alliance, gets a lot of credit for having 4 of the final 5 be women, and for the women actually taking out the men at the end.  

This concludes are look at “Survivor Palau” for now, but not for the What-If series as a whole.  As always, I want to hear what you’d like discussed!  Leave your comments, either on this blog or wherever this blog is posted, describing what change you’d like to see examined.  As always, there are a few guidelines you should consider if you want to see your change discussed, and they are listed below:  

1. One Change Only: This can’t be a whole bunch of things or multiple things going another way to alter the course of a season.  This must be one singular event that alters the season in some way.  Cascade effects, where one change naturally leads to another, are ok, but they have to be natural and logical.  As an example, Shii-Ann not flipping and Chuay Gahn losing the final 10 immunity challenge on “Survivor Thailand” would definitely change things, but those are two independent changes that need to happen, and therefore not appropriate for this blog.  I should also mention that the change has to be an EVENT, not a play style.  Yes, “Survivor Heroes vs. Villains” probably goes much differently if Russell Hantz (“Survivor Samoa”) isn’t an asshole to everyone, but apart from that never happening, it’s a change in overall play style, not a single moment.  It’s also, as I say, implausible, which leads to my next ground rule…

2. The Change Must Be Realistic: An unlikely change is ok, but it has to be something that COULD have happened, or it’s not worth writing about.  Yes, Fang winning the first immunity challenge on “Survivor Gabon” would drastically change the season.  Would it ever happen?  No.  So there’s no point in writing about it.  

3. The Change Must Have An Impact: By this, I mean the change has to actually alter the season in some significant way.  Simply changing up the boot order is not enough.  Someone new has to win, the perception of the season has to change, or both.  As an example, I originally planned to do a blog on “Survivor Heroes vs. Villains”, with a timeline where Candice didn’t flip at the final 9.  I thought this could lead to a Heroes victory.  Then I remembered that Russell Hantz plays his idol in that same episode, meaning the flip most likely doesn’t matter, and apart from a slight boot order change, the season as a whole remains untouched.  Uninteresting, and therefore not worth talking about.  

In addition to these hard-and-fast rules, there are two what I call “Flexible Rules”.  As the name would imply, these rules can be bent with a compelling arguments, but they are two things that should be borne in mind when suggesting new situations to examine:

4. US Seasons Only: This is nothing against international seasons of “Survivor”.  From what I’ve heard through the grapevine, they can be quite good.  The trouble is, as a citizen on the US, the US version of “Survivor” is the one I’m most familiar with, know the most about, and have seen the most of.  I haven’t even seen a full international season of “Survivor”, just the occasional clip.  Nothing knocking them, of course.  I just haven’t gotten around to viewing them.  So, while I won’t outright ban the suggesting of changes from non-US seasons of “Survivor”, bear in mind that I’m unlikely to pick them due to a lack of knowledge and lack of time to catch up on the seasons.  

5. I Will Not Do Brandon Flipping At The Africa Final 9: A flip by Brandon Quinton at the Final 9 of “Survivor Africa”, voting out Lex instead of Kelly, would indeed fit all the criteria mentioned above.  I’m refusing this particular scenario, not because it isn’t interesting or worth talking about, but because it was already covered by Mario Lanza in his book “When it Was Worth Playing For”.  He covered it so well and so thoroughly that I don’t think I would have anything to add.  I’m willing to consider this scenario if someone can give me a compelling reason that Mario is wrong, or there’s some aspect he didn’t consider, but until that time, this scenario is out.  Other “Survivor Africa” scenarios are ok, though.

Hope you all enjoyed this latest installment of “Survivor What-Ifs?”.  I’ll try and get another one out before my vacation in a couple of weeks, but otherwise, I’ll see you back then!

-Matt

“Survivor” What-Ifs?: All-Stars

Well, I promised you more frequent blogs, and here we are!  It’s time to talk about “Survivor All-Stars”, a move clearly designed to capitalize on the recent deep dive into the season on “Rob Has a Podcast”, and totally not just a lucky coincidence in any way whatsoever!  It’s not like I promised this blog a couple weeks ago or anything!  

But yeah, “Survivor All-Stars”.  A season that, on paper, should have been a slam-dunk win for the show.  18 of the fan’s favorite players duking out to see who’s the best of the best? Tributes to seasons past?  This should have been an easy victory, a contender for top season of all-time.  And yet… It’s not.  In some ways, I’d say it kind of gets off easy, since given some events we’ll talk about in the season, it should be as reviled as “Survivor Island of the Idols”, yet avoided some of the controversy by virtue of when it aired.  But between favorites going early, and some controversial/uncomfortable elements, the fanbase kind of quietly tries to pretend this season doesn’t exist.  So, can we change that?  Can we make this season the beloved fan favorite it was meant to be?  Let’s take a dive in and find out.  

Before we get into that, though, be aware that there are SPOILERS ahead.  While we will largely be going through a hypothetical scenario in this blog, the fact is, it’s hard to talk about such a scenario without comparing it to how things went down in our timeline, and thus there will be spoilers in this blog.  Primarily, this will be in relation to “Survivor All-Stars”, but some future seasons may also get discussed in the “Legacy” section.  Point being, proceed with caution.  

THE IMPACT

So, in a first for this blog, we have a change that technically occurs outside the season itself.  As mentioned in the last blog, the change is that Kathy wins the final immunity challenge of “Survivor Marquesas”, and, as a cascade effect, wins the season.  At first glance, you might think this might not change All-Stars at all.  After all, Kathy was on the season in our timeline, and as a more popular winner, you think they’re not bringing her back?  Of course, I can’t argue with any of this.  What I CAN argue with is that Kathy winning doesn’t change the makeup of All-Stars in any way.  

You see, dear reader, I think a Kathy win would force a shakeup from the tribe division we’ve come to know on this season.  Not that they would have made an effort to bring in Brian Heidik from “Survivor Thailand” to have a tribe of all-winners or anything.  If the rumors of Brian being hard to work with and demanding money up front to play again are true, that’s not happening.  But there’s no way without it that production would have three winners on a single tribe.  Was it a mistake to put the winners at such an obvious disadvantage in our timeline?  Perhaps, but at the time, I don’t think production sees it that way, and is more concerned with the previous winners not running rampant over the other players.  If Kathy stays on Mogo Mogo, then that tribe is half-winners (Kathy, Richard, and Jenna), and production’s not going to stand for that.  How do they shake it up?  Well, there’s a couple of different ways, but I think they’d ultimately go with the simplest one: Swapping two members between Mogo Mogo and Chapera.  Saboga probably gets left out since they have two winners in our timeline, but Kathy and Colby probably start on Chapter, while Boston Rob and Amber start on Mogo Mogo.  This switch seems the simplest and the neatest.  The seasonal makeup of each tribe doesn’t change, no tribe has more than two winners on it, and neither tribe gets a major challenge advantage or disadvantage by the trade.  I suppose in terms of challenges, one would rather have Kathy than Amber, but that’s a minor point.  I did consider that production might swap Alicia to Mogo Mogo instead of Amber, but then Colby and Amber start on the same tribe again, when they started on the same tribe in their first season.  Granted, that didn’t stop them from putting Tina and Jerri on the same tribe, even in our timeline, but I think doing so twice might be too much.  So, Saboga stays the same, Chapera now has Kathy and Colby, and Mogo Mogo now has Boston Rob and Amber.  So what?

THE FALLOUT

As always, with changes that happen so early in the season, it’s tough to go through decision by decision, episode by episode, and say how things would go.  Too much changes to really have, for want of a better word, “definitive” conclusions.  That said, there are some generalizations I think we can make, based on this one simple change.  

First, alliances.  Saboga remains the same, of course, since nothing changed with them.  Mogo Mogo is also fairly straightforward.  Similar to Saboga, there’s a bit of an anti-winner sentiment, or at least an anti-Richard Hatch sentiment.  Even in our timeline, Hatch was destined to be the first boot of Mogo Mogo, and I don’t see either Rob or Amber changing that.  He was the biggest fish in the pond, after all, and Jenna probably just gets lumped in with him.  Rob and Amber still hook up, and given that Rob and Lex were close before the season aired, it’s fair to say they’d team up here.  As a safety net against Rob’s coupling, Lex probably buddies up with Shii-Ann, even more so than he did in our timeline.  Chapera is a bit of a tougher nut to crack, since so much of their early strategy centered around Rob and Amber.  That said, I see Rob C. and Kathy being the pariahs, both for playing good games, and the latter for winning.  Colby probably ringleads an alliance of himself, Alicia, Big Tom, and Sue against the pair, though being Colby, he doesn’t really frame it that way.  

The second change this produces is in terms of challenges.  Saboga is still a train wreck, so a lot of outcomes remain unchanged.  However, given how big a force Boston Rob was in terms of winning the challenges, I’d say in this timeline, Chapera and Mogo Mogo flip victories from what we know.  Mostly this just swaps around first and second place, but it DOES lead to a Mogo Mogo loss in episode 4’s immunity challenge.  But oh, what an important loss that is.  You see, this is where Rob C. went out in our timeline, whereas here, he’s safe up until the dissolution of Saboga.  Who goes instead?  Assuming Mogo Mogo loses, it can only be Richard.  Dude was too big a target.  As a consequence, the incident between himself and Sue now never happens, already making this timeline an improvement over the one we got.  But this also means that Rob C. isn’t quite as screwed over as in our timeline.  He’s still screwed, of course, but at least seems to have more of a chance just due to lasting longer.  

Without Richard there to suggest Mogo Mogo tie their logs together, it’s tough to say what the outcome of the dissolution challenge would be, but given how Saboga was on a losing streak, let’s say they lose again.  The pairs stay the same, but switch to opposite tribes, Jenna and Rupert now going to Mogo Mogo, while Ethan and Jerri end up on Chapera.  How do we know this?  In the show, we see Colby wanting to take Ethan for Mogo Mogo, and his being on Chapera probably doesn’t change that.  Plus, Rob says in the commentary for the finale in our timeline that he wanted Rupert and Jenna on his tribe anyway if they got first pick, so again, probably nothing changes here, though related to a point in the previous paragraph, Sue presumably doesn’t quit, since the inciting incident no longer happens.  

From there, our win/loss flip for Chapera and Mogo Mogo continues.  While up 8-6 initially, Chapera keeps on losing and losing, sending out the winners and threats in Rob C., Kathy, and Ethan.  With no Sue quit, the losing streak continues, forcing Chapera to eat at least one of their own.  Mostly likely Sue, since even in this timeline, she probably gets on everyone’s nerves.  What’s interesting here is the second tribe swap.  If we assume the random draw still ends up lopsidedly leaving only Amber on her original tribe, joined in this timeline by Colby, Big Tom, Alicia, and Jerri.  This means that Boston Rob’s plea to save Amber, the thing that arguably inadvertently screws him over the most in our timeline, falls on deaf ears.  Unless Colby and Jerri blow up again (and if we’re assuming they made it this far without voting each other out, I think we can say that Amber won’t change that), Rob no longer has a Lex to try and make a deal with, nor a Kathy to plead his case.  There is only Colby calling the shots, and Colby doesn’t care about Rob’s romance.  Amber gets the axe, and Rob goes from cutthroat mafia don to heartbroken lover.  Heck, jumping ahead a bit, without spending the whole game together, this may even kill the Rob/Amber power couple.  There might be no Amazing Race legacy, even!  

Thus, Mogo Mogo has an edge at the merge, though very slight.  It’s nearly impossible to predict how things would go at this point, though in general, I’d say they keep their advantage.  Rob wants revenge, and Lex is happy to use that drive to his advantage, probably bringing in Big Tom as an extra sixth vote, then getting out Colby, Alicia, and Jerri, probably in that order.  From there, it comes down to who of the original Mogo Mogo can grab power.  With no Amber at his side, it’s probably not Rob.  My guess would be that Lex and Shii-Ann become the power duo of the season, though not in a romantic sense.  Between Lex’s connection to Big Tom, and Rob losing his partner, my guess would be that those two power through to the end, leading to an ultimate victory for Lex, though with Shii-Ann gaining a lot of respect along the way.  If nothing else, we lose out on the unpleasantness that is the overly-personal post-merge of our timeline.  True, it’s still pretty much a straight Pagonging, but at least it’s merely routine, rather than painful.  

THE LEGACY

For once, we’ll start with how this impacts returnee seasons, partly because there’s fewer that people from All-Stars qualify for, and partly because All-Stars doesn’t really make most anyone new more famous.  We’ve had returnees from the All-Stars era, like Rupert, Colby, and Jerri, but they were famous due to their original season, not so much their performance on this season.  Really, only Boston Rob and Amber became household names as a result of All-Stars.  Amber is now relegated to the “forgotten” pile in this timeline, but Rob is still remembered.  That said, Rob’s perception changes from how we now it in the eyes of the audience.  Rather than known as the cutthroat backstabber he was after All-Stars, Rob in this time is, ironically, noted for his loyalty.  He sticks with his original tribe throughout, and goes on a revenge quest for his girlfriend after she gets voted out.  It helps as well that he doesn’t have as many personal betrayals as in our timeline, making things feel less personal overall.  So he probably still comes back on all the seasons we think of, but on Heroes vs. Villains, is actually on the Heroes tribe.  How weird is that?

Lex winning doesn’t change a ton, as while his gameplay is respected, he is ultimately a “villain” winner in the eyes of the public.  Remembered, but not super well-liked.  Still, he probably comes back for Winners at War in Nick’s spot, with someone like Jenna probably taking over Amber’s spot in this timeline.  Really, the breakout star of the new timeline, though, is Shii-Ann.  All-Stars made her more notable in our timeline, but here, where she plays a solid game and comes close to winning?  She’s a legend now.  Probably brought back several times, most likely on Heroes vs. Villains as a Villain, and possibly in Game Changers as well.  

Really, though, the big question is whether the perception of All-Stars overall changes as a result of the new timeline.  I’d say it does, and does so for the better.  Most of the unpleasantness, from the Richard/Sue incident to the personal betrayals of Boston Rob, are gone now, and some of our big names make it a bit farther.  True, there’s still a Pagonging post-merge, and a lot of big names still go out early, but hey, low bar or not, this new timeline is definitely an improvement overall.  At worst, this timeline is merely boring.  At best, it’s a great tribute to the early days of “Survivor” with no pain whatsoever on rewatch.  

And that about wraps up this two-parter of a “What If?” Scenario.  I hope you all enjoyed exploring it, and I hope there’s more to come.  That said, I’m always soliciting for new ideas for scenarios to look at, so feel free to post them in the comments below, either directly on the blog, or on whatever form of social media you found this on.  Do also bear in mind that there are some rules determining whether or not I’ll accept a scenario for review:

1. One Change Only: This can’t be a whole bunch of things or multiple things going another way to alter the course of a season.  This must be one singular event that alters the season in some way.  Cascade effects, where one change naturally leads to another, are ok, but they have to be natural and logical.  As an example, Shii-Ann not flipping and Chuay Gahn losing the final 10 immunity challenge on “Survivor Thailand” would definitely change things, but those are two independent changes that need to happen, and therefore not appropriate for this blog.  I should also mention that the change has to be an EVENT, not a play style.  Yes, “Survivor Heroes vs. Villains” probably goes much differently if Russell Hantz (“Survivor Samoa”) isn’t an asshole to everyone, but apart from that never happening, it’s a change in overall play style, not a single moment.  It’s also, as I say, implausible, which leads to my next ground rule…

2. The Change Must Be Realistic: An unlikely change is ok, but it has to be something that COULD have happened, or it’s not worth writing about.  Yes, Fang winning the first immunity challenge on “Survivor Gabon” would drastically change the season.  Would it ever happen?  No.  So there’s no point in writing about it.  

3. The Change Must Have An Impact: By this, I mean the change has to actually alter the season in some significant way.  Simply changing up the boot order is not enough.  Someone new has to win, the perception of the season has to change, or both.  As an example, I originally planned to do a blog on “Survivor Heroes vs. Villains”, with a timeline where Candice didn’t flip at the final 9.  I thought this could lead to a Heroes victory.  Then I remembered that Russell Hantz plays his idol in that same episode, meaning the flip most likely doesn’t matter, and apart from a slight boot order change, the season as a whole remains untouched.  Uninteresting, and therefore not worth talking about.  

In addition to these hard-and-fast rules, there are two what I call “Flexible Rules”.  As the name would imply, these rules can be bent with a compelling arguments, but they are two things that should be borne in mind when suggesting new situations to examine:

4. US Seasons Only: This is nothing against international seasons of “Survivor”.  From what I’ve heard through the grapevine, they can be quite good.  The trouble is, as a citizen on the US, the US version of “Survivor” is the one I’m most familiar with, know the most about, and have seen the most of.  I haven’t even seen a full international season of “Survivor”, just the occasional clip.  Nothing knocking them, of course.  I just haven’t gotten around to viewing them.  So, while I won’t outright ban the suggesting of changes from non-US seasons of “Survivor”, bear in mind that I’m unlikely to pick them due to a lack of knowledge and lack of time to catch up on the seasons.  

5. I Will Not Do Brandon Flipping At The Africa Final 9: A flip by Brandon Quinton at the Final 9 of “Survivor Africa”, voting out Lex instead of Kelly, would indeed fit all the criteria mentioned above.  I’m refusing this particular scenario, not because it isn’t interesting or worth talking about, but because it was already covered by Mario Lanza in his book “When it Was Worth Playing For”.  He covered it so well and so thoroughly that I don’t think I would have anything to add.  I’m willing to consider this scenario if someone can give me a compelling reason that Mario is wrong, or there’s some aspect he didn’t consider, but until that time, this scenario is out.  Other “Survivor Africa” scenarios are ok, though.

Have a good weekend, everyone!

-Matt

The Vytas-Verse: Second Iteration

Preseason content commence! Yes, with the posting of far too many articles on “Entertainment Weekly” and the update of the official website, we are now officially in the “On-season” for “Survivor”, meaning it’s time to stop writing “Survivor Retrospectives”, and start getting hyped for “Survivor Cambodia”. Normally this would be where I talk about the cast and their respective chances in the game, but since we’ve known the cast for about 4 months now, I’ve already done that. True, we do have the breakdown of the tribes now, but it doesn’t change much of my early predictions, so I don’t feel the need to redo that blog. Instead, I’ve got a couple of other preseason blogs in mind that I’ll be posting at my leisure, this being the first one.

With that in mind, what am I blathering on about today? Well, people who’ve been reading this blog for a while may remember that back during “Survivor Blood vs. Water” I compared one contestant, Vytas Baskauskas, to a superhero based solely upon his first name, and made it a running gag throughout the blog. Since Vytas is appearing on “Survivor Cambodia”, you’d think I’d continue this running gag. However, I believe that this gag has run it’s course, and since I had Super Vytas get de-powered into regular Vytas at the end of those blogs, it just wouldn’t be appropriate to continue. I did like the gag, though, and did enjoy one special blog where I gave everyone on the show (except for Katie Collins, whom I couldn’t think of anything fun to write for, so I just made her a love interest) a super-powered identity, mainly villains because villains are more fun to write. With that in mind, as a tribute to the gag, I thought I’d give this season’s cast the same treatment. Just a fun little side project before the season proper begins.

A quick disclaimer before I start off: I am fully aware that, in doing these types of blogs, I am making fun of real life people who do have feelings, and who could conceivably be insulted by my portrayal of them here. I would just like to state, for the record, that my intention is not to insult anyone. Rather, it is to humorously blend my loves of “Survivor” and superheroes into one entity. Again, I reiterate this particular post is meant to be HUMOROUS and not an actual commentary on any people or institutions or activities or lifestyles. Whether I make someone a hero or villain is not a reflection upon them in any way, just what I think makes for a better story. Any insults to any person or group is entirely unintentional, and I apologize in advance for any such unintentional insults. Except for any jabs at far right-wing politics, which are entirely intentional.

Well, without further ado, I present: THE VYTAS-VERSE, TAKE 2!

OUR STORY SO FAR: Following the defeat of Super Vytas on “Survivor Blood vs. Water”, he was immediately taken into custody by The Syndicate, shadow rulers of Los Angeles, and the designer of these deathtraps called “Survivor”. Having derived a de-powering formula from Vytasite, Super Vytas became de-powered back into regular Vytas Baskauskas. Ever zen, however, Vytas accepted his fate with good grace, in part because he knew this plan of The Syndicate’s for ultimate control would fail. Sure enough, the plan backfired in a big way. Once the defeat of Super Vytas was made public, support for The Syndicate dropped considerably, even amounting to open rebellion in some places. As The Syndicate had hoped, a number of new super villains came out of the woodwork following the defeat of Super Vytas. What The Syndicate did not anticipate, however, was the rise of a few new superheroes to combat the threat of new super villains. Los Angeles, once tightly controlled by The Syndicate, is now slipping into chaos, caused in part by one of the new super villains, an extradimensional god known simply as “Khaos”. These new threats overwhelming them, The Syndicate had no choice but to reach out to Vytas. Desperate, they offered Vytas the antidote to the depowering syrum, if in exchange he would go back on “Survivor” (along with some super villains either tricked or captured to be put on the island) and defeat the villains for The Syndicate, thereby removing the problem and showing the power of The Syndicate once again. However, The Syndicate’s formula was experimental, and doesn’t seemed to have worked, meaning rather than getting back Super Vytas, regular Vytas must now work together with a few new heroes also on the island to combat a rising threat.

OUR PLAYERS:

Kelly-Woman: Once Super Vytas was defeated, his arch-nemesis Aras-Man began t have a change of heart bout his evil ways The Book of Dark Yogic Arts had sunk its proverbial claws deep into unsuspecting Aras Baskauskas, but Aras was pure at heart, and resisted the impulse to use the book again. Desperate, Aras flung the book into the sewer, freeing himself from its control, and hopefully preventing it from getting to anyone else. Aras, however, underestimated the evil of the book, and how it can never be truly gotten rid of. The book was plucked out of the sewer, and thrown in the trash. It was taken to a dump out in rural Nevada, or at least that’s what was supposed to happen. Exerting its influence (the Book always wants to be found), the book fell off the back of the dump truck and got caught up in a dust storm, where it was blown to the doorstep of a worthy new host. That doorstep belonged to Kelly Wiglesworth. In the early days of the formation of The Syndicate, Kelly had been taken on and trained as a possible covert ops agent for them. Horrified at what she was asked to do, though, Kelly escaped and lived a reclusive life, never wanting to go back to The Syndicate, despite their repeated attempts to contact her. Not even the strength of Kelly’s will, though, could resist The Book of Dark Yogic Arts. Feeding on her fears on inadequacy, the book compelled Kelly to use it, leading to her taking the mantle of Kelly-Woman. It also compelled her to take up The Syndicate’s offer this time, so that her agenda, and by extension the books, might be brought to fruition at last.

Tofette: The Villainous Vegetarian: In our modern American society, life is not easy for a vegetarian. Just ask Kimmi Kappenberg, who had to walk through a society that glorified meat and encouraged it’s consumption on a daily basis. Kimmi also had the misfortune of having to associate with several bigotted people who insisted on rubbing their omnivorous nature in her face. Sick to death of slaughterhouse stories, Kimmi went out to commune with nature for long periods. During this time, she learned to communicate with animals telepathically, and gained a modicum of control over them. Talking to animals only increased the militantness of Kimmi’s vegetarianism, though, by hearing horror stories of their brethren being shot and killed. Now convinced that the world would not accept vegetarianism unless she made it so, Kimmi took up the mantle of Tofette, and set about taking her revenge on society. With an army of animals that she can call to her aid at any time, Kimmi now gives the world an ultimatum: Become vegetarian or PERISH!

The Peanut Butter Bandit: More ominous than his name would indicate, The Peanut Butter Bandit is secretly Jeff Varner. In fact, it’s so secret that even he doesn’t know about it. An early contestant in one of The Syndicate’s deathtraps, Jeff met his end after falling for a peanut butter trap about midway through. This was not Jeff’s only terrible encounter with peanut butter, though. Jeff had repressed these memories, but both of his parents were nearly killed after chocking on chunky peanut butter that wasn’t quite chunky enough. These repressed memories, combined with his manner of leaving The Syndicate’s deathtrap, led Jeff to snap in the mental sense. He was also able to repress these impulses, but not as well as he would like. In a Jekyll and Hyde situation, Jeff behaves normally most of the time. However, whenever he sees peanut butter, he snaps to become The Peanut Butter Bandit. When this side of him comes out, he stalks anybody with a large concentration of peanut butter in their house (using a psychologically-enhanced sense of smell), and brutally murders them. His calling card: A smily face drawn on his victims in peanut butter.

Savage Killer: Another early contestant in one of The Syndicate’s deathtraps, Andrew Savage, now better known as Savage Killer, was actually a confederate designed to make sure The Syndicate got a good outcome from “Survivor Pearl Islands”. However, Savage was not as subtle as he liked to believe, was sniffed out by his fellow competitors, and set adrift in the ocean to die, with only a machete to help him. Savage was certain that The Syndicate would shortly rescue him, but The Syndicate did not want to damage their reputation, and so left Savage for dead. Savage was a lot tougher than anyone expected, however. He eventually washed up on the shore of the continental U.S. Savage was not the same man, though. Time alone at sea does things to a person’s mind, and Savage had nothing but time in which his mind could be altered. Enraged at humanity in general and The Syndicate in particular, Savage saw his only friend as being his trust machete, which he had named “Morgan” during the course of his trip. Now in “rage against the machine” mode, and unable to get out of desperate survival mode (and by extension, unable to conform to modern society), Savage started using Morgan to take out his anger on anyone who approached him. Dubbed “Savage Killer” by the local papers, his strength and ferocity know no bounds. It will take heroes of incredible strength to defeat this worthy, if crazy, adversary.

Immuno-Man: One of the first heroes to spring up following the defeat of Super Vytas, Immuno-Man is actually former fighter pilot Terry Dietz. Terry had known from a young age that he was destined for greatness, since nothing seemed to affect him. Events that should have seriously injured or even killed normal humans did nothing to Terry. Building on this success, Terry built up his physical strength, and even took dangerous jobs, so that he could do them better than others with half the risk. Once Super Vytas’ defeat became public, Terry realized that he could use his powers for a higher calling. After all, who better to be a superhero than a man who can’t be killed? Initially, Terry took on the moniker of “Captain America”, but after Marvel comics threatened a lawsuit, he switched to the less-thrilling moniker of “Immuno-Man”. Terry is not without his weaknesses though. For some reason, whenever he has to perform some act that involves balance, his powers suddenly disappear. Accordingly, most of his nemeses make sure that to get to them, Terry must go across some form of balance beam.

Calligrapher: Peih-Gee Law didn’t intend to become a super villain when she was placed on “Survivor China” by The Syndicate, but that’s what happened. You see, Peih-Gee was brought on as comic relief, someone designed to be good at the game, but so socially unaware that she’d never get a leg up. This is what happened. However, during a desperate search for a hidden immunity idol, Peih-Gee came across an ancient Chinese scroll. Taking it back home, Peih-Gee had it translated. She discovered that this scroll produced a novel idea: that caligraphy could be more than just a language: it could alter reality. By writing various Chinese symbols, Penh-Gee could gain a wide variety of powers, including invisibility, time travel, and reality warping. Depressed over her perception on the show, Peih-Gee went a little mad with power, and used her reality-warping powers to commit crimes, making her jewelry store the most successful in the world. But even this success is not enough for her. Now going by her villainous name “Calligrapher”, Peih-Gee is back in a death trap of The Syndicate, determined that this time, with her reality-warping powers, she won’t be losing.

Amplitude: A huge nerd about The Syndicate’s deathtraps, Stephen Fishbach was finally given a chance to try his luck out in the deathtrap known as “Survivor Tocantins”. His smarts actually allowed him to outwit most every twist The Syndicate could throw in. His weakness, however, was in keeping around his muscular ally, J.T., for too long. J.T. threw Stephen under the bus in the end, leading Stephen to lose. Depressed, thinking he would never have another shot, Stephen’s love for the game only intensified. He spent more and more time on the internet, writing and podcasting about “Survivor”. Of course, Stephen’s smarts meant that, in the back of his mind, he was working on other, more scientific, projects. These melded in his mind until he eventually developed a device that could literally turn people into radio waves. Unable to find a test subject, Stephen used it on himself, becoming the villain later known as “Amplitude”. Having become a living radio wave (though he could become human again at will), Stephen found that he could use his new form to manipulate people, by producing hypnotic sounds from his radio-wave body. This has led to the unprecedented popularity of “Rob has a Podcast”, as well as of Stephen himself, and will soon lead to a hopefully more successful run on “Survivor Cambodia”.

Underachiever: No one expected Monica Padilla to ever amount to much, and frankly, they weren’t wrong. True, Monica was selected to go on one of The Syndicate’s deathtraps, but more as eye-candy for the audience than anything. What most people don’t know is that, in order to attract a wider audience, The Syndicate had actually surgically enhanced Monica’s beauty, making her literally more beautiful than anyone else could hope to be. You might even say she was super-beautiful. Certainly Monica would say this, as her newfound super-beauty gave her power over the weak-minded. People lowered their expectations around her, hence how she got her villain name. They adored everything she said and did, even if it was complete rubbish. Once out of the deathtrap, Monica used these lowered expectations to amass a fortune, and a great following. But with great power comes a desire for more power, and her followers are not enough. Monica is back to gain even more followers, potentially starting her own cult.

The Wall: Not, as the name might indicate, another person with invulnerability powers, Abi-Maria Gomes puts up a wall of a different sort: a wall of illogic. Even from birth, Abi-Maria’s statements made very little sense to all but herself, but Abi-Maria could not be persuaded to see reason. Reason simply could not penetrate the wall of illogic that was her mind. In the end, those exposed to the wall too long are forced to accept her logic and keep her around, despite all evidence to the contrary. After further developing her powers, Abi-Maria was able to project her mental walls of illogic into physical walls, allowing her to create force fields from her illogical statements. All the above powers give Abi-Maria, now called simply “The Wall”, and inflated sense of how good she is at things, and walks through life getting her way, though both legal and illegal means.

Vytas Baskauskas: As previously described, Vytas Baskauskas, once Super Vytas, had his powers drained by The Syndicate after being defeated on “Survivor Blood vs. Water”. Oddly, Vytas was content with the situation, even glad of being able to settle down for a normal life as a math professor. It helped that there were many other heroes taking the place of Super Vytas to keep the world safe. However, the sheer number of villains has caused Super Vytas to be called back into action. The Syndicate traded Super Vytas an experimental antidote to the anti-superpower syrum they had injected him with in exchange for his promise to help put The Syndicate back in control of Los Angeles. Seeing the chaos that unfurled when The Syndicate was not in charge, Vytas agreed. To facilitate Vytas’ defeat of villainy, The Syndicate stuck him back on another island deathtrap. However, the experimental formula does not seem to be working. Can normal Vytas stand up to all these superpowered beings?

Sini-Sister: If you thought having God powers had made Ciera Eastin crazy, you had seen NOTHING compared to how crazy she became after being defeated on “Survivor Blood vs. Water”. Any semblance of an agenda is now out the window. She surpassed even her mother in the eyes of the world, and now simply brings destruction wherever she goes, her powers out of control.

The Fox: While Jeff Probst, aka “The Snuffer”, remains the main assassin employed by The Syndicate, he is hardly the only one out there. Chief amongst these “master assassins” is the one known simply as “The Fox”. Sometimes employed by The Syndicate, sometimes not, The Fox goes wherever the money is (though she does tend to kill bad guys), no one suspecting that she is actually the mild-mannered Tasha Fox. In fact, Tasha uses this petit frame to her advantage, making people unsuspecting of just how lethal she can be. Not firmly aligned to either order or chaos, the only way you know if The Fox is one your side is if she kills you when you see her. If you’re still alive, she’s on your side. Just be careful, because as her name would imply, she’s a crafty one, skill in deception and espionage, as well ass assassination. Just when you think she’s on your side, she’ll snake you.

Bad Hand: Regrettably for Spencer Bledsoe, his life was pretty much doomed from the start. While pregnant with him, his mother happened to rear-end the car of a voodoo priest, who was very unreasonable about the situation. She cursed her child to have perpetual bad luck. So it was that, whatever Spencer did, despite his brilliant mind, everything was stacked against him. Any game he played, he would role badly. Every job, every college course, something would go wrong. Spencer just could not catch a break. As you can imagine, this wears on you a little bit, and Spencer became determined that, if his life was going to be one horrible incident of bad luck after another, everyone else’s should be to. After extensive study of voodoo curses, Spencer figured out how to weaponize his bad luck. True, the bad luck would still remain with him, but Spencer invented a device, worn on the hand, that allowed him to project his horrible luck onto anyone he touches, so that they might feel his pain. Taking the alias “Bad Hand”, Spencer will not rest until the curse that so afflicts him is spread to the rest of the world.

Khaos: It would take an extradimensional god to get The Syndicate to realign with Super Vytas. No one knows precisely where this being came from, or why she chooses the human name of Kass McQuillen, but one thing is certain: wherever she goes, chaos follows. Simple, unpredictable chaos. Yes, this being is a god that controls chaos, and it appears to be an angry god. Some say there is a sinister, calculated motive behind this being’s actions. Others say that it acts simply based on instinct, here to cause havoc for notoriety’s sake, but once this being’s actions are seen, they cannot be forgotten. Whether or not this being can be stopped remains a question that is up in the air, but regardless, it’s effects will be felt for years to come.

Sonic the Ninja: Yung “Woo” Hwang was a normal, stereotypical surfer dude without a care in the world. No rules, no responsibilities, just the good life. That is, until nuclear testing began in the Pacific Ocean. Irradiated particles were now being distributed throughout the ocean, and some of them got swept up into hurricanes. During one of said hurricanes, Woo was debating whether to play a “Sonic the Hedgehog” game or a “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles” game, when lightning from one of these irradiated hurricanes struck Woo’s house, since Woo hadn’t been able to afford a lightning rod at this point. By striking Woo’s house, the lightning also struck Woo, and since it was irradiated lightning, Woo absurd the powers of the protagonists of the games he happened to be holding. He gained the speed of Sonic the Hedgehog, and the ninja skills of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, what he would later dub his “Ninja Stealth Mode”. Woo, being the naive, excitable sort, took this as a sign that he need to become a superhero. Uncreatively dubbing himself “Sonic the Ninja” Woo uses his powers to fight crime, wherever it is obvious in the world.

Miss-Appear: Kelley Wentworth had a lot of things going for her in life: she was smart, she was pretty, she was an excellent speaker, and she knew her way around social media. Unfortunately, as the daughter of a farmer, she often got stereotyped and ignored. Many opportunities were denied her, and Kelley was stuck in mediocre work. Ever positive, though, Kelley believed that she was going to find some higher purpose soon. Her purpose came one day when she decided to help a friend test an experimental mood-changing makeup. The test seemed to be a failure, but Kelley later discovered that the makeup had simply been absorbed into her bloodstream. Also, it wasn’t a MOOD changing makeup that had been created, it was an APPEARANCE changing makeup, to the point that Kelley could now, at will, take on the appearance of any other living person. Kelley opted to use this power to right social wrongs as the hero Miss-Appear. By taking on the appearance of high-ranking officials, she is able to give the downtrodden an opportunity to show their real worth, and opportunity she never got. When the need calls for it, she also uses her powers to fight more serious, super-powered crime.

The Fireman: Jeremy Collins’ first experience with The Syndicate, as a badass normal brought onto the deathtrap known as “Survivor San Juan del Sur”, was not a pleasant one. He was a crowd-pleaser who did very well, but was ultimately overpowered by the few super-powered beings on his season. Frustrated, Jeremy begged The Syndicate to give him some powers of his own. Having had little luck with chemically-induced powers in the past, The Syndicate crafted for him an endoskeleton as strong as there ever was. At his own request, Jeremy also had a large tank of water and two fire-hoses installed into said skeleton. This not only grants him super-strength, but also allows him to shoot jets of water from both hands, by extending the hoses that life just under the skin. Aiming to keep up his crowd-pleasing persona, Jeremy opted to fight crime, rather than cause it. However, some have question his methods. His “Surround and Drown” strategy for dealing with criminals leads to a lot of deaths, which nobody likes.

Nale-Head: Not actually a human at first glance, Nale-Head (no one knows what his name was before he came to Earth), is actually the advance guard of an invading alien species. Symbiotic in nature, this particular species of alien cannot move on its own, but requires some sort of meat puppet. Hence, after crash-landing in the Louisiana swamps, this being attached itself to the first animal it came across: simple man Keith Nale. Unfortunately, the alien species is not well-adapted to combine with humans, particularly stupid ones. The psychic abilities of the alien were a poor match for the utter lack of intelligence that was Keith Nale. Horrified at first, the creature quickly realized that, while the idiocy of its host may have dampened many of its powers, it had gained new ones as well. It could now project the idiocy of the human Keith outward, effectively making it an infectious disease. Posing as Keith’s mustache (this particular alien species is mustache-shaped), and taking the new name “Nale-Head”, the creature now seeks to dumb down Earth’s population, primarily by encouraging them to “stick to the plan”, in order to prepare them for the coming invasion.

Gem-Man: Despite his stunning good looks, that would lead many to encourage him to pursue a career as a model, Joe Anglim opten instead to become a jewler. Why, you ask? Well, Joe had a secret: ever since he was born, Joe’s body could become made out of any material he touched, if he so wished. It was purely selective, of course: if Joe didn’t want to take on the attributes of Jell-O, he didn’t have to. But Joe found a certain pleasure in taking on the attributes of materials, at least temporarily. He always had to return to his normal body after an hour. Previously, Joe had used his abilities for his own pleasure, but the defeat of Super Vytas changed his outlook. Seeing that his abilities could do good, Joe took up the superhero name “Gem-Man”, and began fighting crime in Super Vytas’ stead.

Monkey Maniac: Life was not kind to Shirin Oskooi (a name that, I would like to point out, I can spell more accurately than the videos on CBS.com). Apart from having a horrible childhood with an abusive family, Shirin was, well, weird. She had a lot of crazy obsessions, notably a strange fixation on monkey sex. Still, Shirin is not one to give up easily. She tried to learn to have people skills, and tone down how out-of-it she could be at times. During this training, however, Shirin discovered that she was a repressed empath, able to take in the feelings and thoughts of others. As her powers advanced, Shirin realized that her own feelings and thoughts could bleed back into others. They started to share her weird obsessions, and Shirin saw an opportunity to make the world in her own image. Dubbed the “Monkey Maniac” by those who come into contact with her, Shirin mainly seeks to help people, while also converting them to her way of life.

This was a weird blog. Make of it what you will. There’ll be one more post from me before the season starts, so be on the lookout. It’ll be extra-special.

-Matt

Title Credit to Jean Storrs.

“Survivor” Retrospectives: Tocantins

Tocantins continues the fine “’Survivor’ Retrospectives” tradition of covering two seasons back-to-back with opposite stories. Not like “Survivor Vanuatu” and “Survivor Palau” though, and certainly not to the extreme of those two seasons. Quite the contrary, I actually have very little negative to say about either Tocantins or “Survivor Gabon”. No, the opposite stories come from my own take on the seasons over the years. As I mentioned last week, “Survivor Gabon” was one of my favorites at the time of airing, but has lost some of its appeal as time has passed. Conversely, while I never hated Tocantins by any stretch of the imagination, I always sort of lumped it into the “pretty ok” category along with “Survivor China”. However, five years on, I find that I may have underappreciated Tocantins in its heyday, and perhaps the good elements it had hold more water than I gave credit for, and the bad elements don’t matter as much as they did in the moment. Admittedly, this intro is fairly detailed, and probably means you already know my opinion, but for those interested, let’s take a deeper look into what makes this season good, and why I thought it average at the time of its airing.
Beforehand, though, I should once again like to remind my readers that this review will contain spoilers for the Tocantins season of “Survivor”. Those who don’t feel that my intro is enough, but also don’t want to be spoiled on the season, can scroll to the bottom of the page, where I’ve added an “Abstract” section. This will give my general thoughts on the strengths of the season without spoilers for the events therein, and is a good overview on how watchable the season is. Now then, with that bit of business out of the way, lets get to the in-depth analysis.

CAST
As I’ve said about many a season before, the cast of Tocantins is a polarizing one. However, I usually mean that in the sense that people either love it or hate it. In this case, however, I mean that the cast itself contained a lot of people who were and are much beloved, and a lot of people who were and are much disliked. For your guide to who’s who, let’s start off with by far the most famous player to come out of the season, James “J.T.” Thomas Jr. The ultimate winner of the show, J.T. was beloved both for his good-old southern boy charm (as he himself said, “It’s something in the accent.”), and for his actually exceptional gameplay. J.T. holds the distinction to ever play a “perfect” game of “Survivor”, which is usually defined as receiving no votes against you before the Final Tribal Council, and sweeping all of the votes at the Final Tribal Council. This is definitely an impressive feat, and while a lot of the people at the time decried J.T. for seeming to have little mental game, leaving it to his alliance-mates, the fact is that, while not necessarily his STRONGEST asset, J.T. did play a great mental game, and an exceptional social game. To have won over the entire jury, and make no mistake, his opponent was no goat, J.T. HAD to have been planning this, and this planning shows in certain moves of his, such as going against his alliance and refusing to vote off Benjamin “Coach” Wade. Don’t tell me that didn’t influence Coach’s decision to vote for J.T. in the end. To be fair, J.T. has lost some fan adoration for a particular action of his on “Survivor Heroes vs. Villains”, but even to this day, he has a pretty decent fan following, his name is still occasionally brought up in “Great ‘Survivor’ Players” conversations, and people still seem to like him. While J.T. wasn’t my absolute favorite on the season (we’ll get to him shortly), I certainly liked him a lot then, and I still like him quite a lot now. His gameplay was good, he got off a lot of nice one-liners, and there was some sort of charm to him that infected even me. I’m glad he was on this season, and I’d be happy to see him again!
Still, whatever J.T. said to the contrary, he could not have gotten to the end on his own. That’s where his main alliance-mate, Stephen Fishbach, comes into play. In a sort of buddy comedy move, Stephen and J.T. became the closest alliance in Tocantins, despite their seeming to have little in common. As mentioned, J.T. portrayed himself as the good-old Southerner, very athletic and socially confident. Stephen, in contrast, was almost your stereotypical East-Coaster. A longtime resident of New York City, Stephen was lanky, awkward, and by his own admission, not very good in challenge. Stephen was a hard worker, to be sure, but he just didn’t quite have the same natural ability as J.T. when it came to survival. To make sure the irony was incredibly thick, Stephen was quoted in the first episode of saying words to the effect that the Southerner (nobody knew each other’s names yet) and himself would probably have little in common, and that he was accordingly afraid. Not to say that Stephen was entirely defined by his relationship to J.T., of course, just that it played the biggest role in the season. On his own, Stephen was still a great character. A little lanky and awkward, but very determined and quite the good schemer. Put it this way: he managed to obtain an idol despite not having been to Exile Island, but instead by making a close relationship with the person who HAD been to Exile Island. That takes some doing. On top of this, Stephen made a good “Fish out of Water” (pun totally intended) story, due to his being very brainy but lacking in outdoor skills. This gave him almost an underdog quality, and it was a joy to watch his machinations keep him in the game longer and longer. And to guild the lily, Stephen could be counted upon for both insightful and funny confessionals. In case it wasn’t clear, Stephen is my favorite castaway from Tocantins. I identified a lot with his brainy aspects, and he made a lot of the same moves I made. While in some ways he was overshadowed by J.T., Stephen still made a great impact on the fandom, and when talking about the smartest “Survivor”-players ever, he’s usually way up there. It helps that he has a regular role on “Rob Has A Podcast”, reality tv podcasts done by Rob Cesternino of “Survivor The Amazon”, which keep him in the public consciousness somewhat. Personally, I’m very disappointed that Stephen has not been brought back for a season yet, and hope that, in future, Stephen will get the second chance he so richly deserves As a final note, I’ll say that at the time of the airing of Tocantins, Stephen was the second closest I’d ever come to rooting for the winner, and even as of the time of this writing, he’s still the third closest. Given how the people I like USUALLY fare, that’s pretty impressive.
Tamara “Taj” Johnson-George makes up the third member of the three-person alliance J.T. and Stephen were the key members of. While regrettably not as well-remembered as J.T. and Stephen are today, Taj was much talked about at the time, and I would argue is criminally underrated. Like Stephen, Taj was not very comfortable in the outdoors, and perhaps even beat out Stephen in this regard. Larger than the average contestant, and not in a good way, Taj was also used to a fairly nice lifestyle, having been a famous singer with the “Sisters with Voices” group, and married to pro-football player Eddie George. Needless to say, most people had her pegged as an early boot, but Taj became a pleasant surprise to most with very impressive strategic chops. Sent to Exile Island very early on, Taj managed to make a cross tribal alliance with Timbira member Brendan Synnott (who, while a perfectly fine person, did not leave much impact, and as such will not be talked about much in this blog), and even wormed her way into the good graces of her tribe, mostly through her never-give-up attitude and her warm, bubbly personality. Although down in numbers come the merge, Taj, along with J.T. and Stephen, managed to make a majority out of a minority. While J.T. and Stephen tend to get the credit for turning around the fortunes of the Jalapao tribe come the merge, Taj played her part as well, and by the end was respected as a nice person and a good strategist. Her popularity has died out, mostly due to being overshadowed by J.T. and Stephen, which is unfortunate. Similar to Lisa Whelchel of “Survivor Philippines” Taj was an out-of-place woman expected to be gone early, but had surprising strategic chops, and lasted quite a long time. While she could be a bit over-the-top for my tastes at times, I still enjoyed her story a lot, and wouldn’t mind seeing her come back either.
But, having gone over the good of the “Survivor Tocantins” cast, we must now discuss the bad of the “Survivor Tocantins” cast. Far and away, the big name in all this was the aforementioned “Coach”. The self-proclaimed “Dragonslayer” and leader of the Timbira tribe, Coach was the one promoted the most for this season. He was crazy. He had outlandish stories. He wanted to restore “honor” to the game. It was this last part that really turned me off to Coach. No one, and I mean no one, plays the game “honorably”. Some may play it COMPARATIVELY honorably, but Coach doesn’t even fall into THAT category. He lied and betrayed almost as much as everyone else on the show, professed to wanting to keep the strong, but then voted out Brendan, just became all-around very hypocritical, and hypocrisy really bugs me on this show. What was worse, he seemed to have no self-knowledge, and didn’t realize just how these stories and grandiose statements were making him sound. The reaction of his fellow cast members pretty much mirrors what other people thought of him. Some, like Tyson Apostol, found him highly entertaining and a good guy, while others life Erinn Lobdell and Taj couldn’t stand him and his bragging. Erinn herself put it best, simply by saying “Who IS this jackass?” The audience pretty much fell into the same two camps, and it’s pretty obvious that I put in more with the Erinn and Taj camp. Admittedly, I may be being a bit hard on Coach, as he did get much less annoying in his later appearances, but at the time, particularly because he was the most hyped contestant of the season, I was ready to see him gone.
Following the patter seen with J.T., Stephen, and Taj, where all the well-liked people aligned, all the people I like less seemed to align. In this case, Coach’s ally Tyson was also a character I didn’t particularly care for. Unlike Coach, however, I seem to be alone on this, as audiences loved Tyson. He was fairly good looking, and had a very snarky sense of humor. Honestly, I think it was the humor that made me not very fond of Tyson. His brand of snark often involved making very derogatory comments towards his fellow contestants. Now that’s all well and good, it can be funny, except that with Tyson, I got the feeling he really meant them, hyperbole and all. On top of that, I never really saw him make fun of himself, which to me is the mark of a good comedian, and would have served as a nice balance to his snark towards others. As it stood at the time, I saw him as a very mean-spirited narcissist, with not a lot of strategic game. People talk up Tyson’s strategic mind, but taking this season on it’s own, Tyson really didn’t do anything. He was out fairly quickly at the merge, most of the blindsides on his tribe were orchestrated by Coach, and while he did win a few immunities, which is always a nice touch, I just don’t get what made Tyson so special. What I did see, I didn’t like, so I, for one, am not a fan of Tyson.
That really sums up the cast of Tocantins who made a lasting impact, but there are a few who were popular at the time who bear mentioning. One, Sierra Reed, was often the target of Tyson’s humor, and was considered one of the more “outdoors-challenged” people to make it far. A lot followed Tyson’s lead with the snark, but some had sympathy for her. I tended to be neutral on Sierra. I liked her ok, but she wasn’t one of my favorites, and I wasn’t sorry she left. She was fairly nice, though. Overcoming similar odds was Sandy Burgin, a tough older lady whom many thought left too soon. I was one of those people. Sandy was a lot of fun, and as we don’t get enough tough older ladies on the show, I enjoyed her tenure. Also fun to watch was Sydney Wheeler, who is often called one of the better looking women to have appeared on the show. While I do agree, and she was one of my first “Survivor” crushes (though only lightly, as our ages were still a bit far apart to be feasible), I’m not one of those people who watches “Survivor” to look at young women in swimsuits. Thankfully, Sydney had more going for her than that. One of the more socially apt women, she tried to play a Parvati Shallow-esque (“Survivor Cook Islands”) game, and flirt her way to the top. While it didn’t work, it was fun to watch, and I enjoyed Sydney.
All that said, however, Tocantins must be acknowledged to having a lot of flops, and a lot of flops who made it deep on top of that. Most egregious is the aforementioned Erinn, who made final three despite being fairly boring, the occasional one-liner notwithstanding. Debra “Debbie” Beebee, Brendan, Joe Dowdle, and others not mentioned, seemed like perfectly nice people, but just left no impact on the game, and as such people make up a large portion of the cast, and those who were memorable being a fairly even split between good and bad characters, my score might seem high. All I can say is that more will be revealed in the “Overall” section.

Score: 9 out of 10.

CHALLENGES
They’re not often talked about, but a lot of the challenges from Tocantins became staples of the series, and are counted amongst the greats. The rolling of giant crates, and using said crates to build a set of stairs comes from Tocantins, as does the now overused Water-Basketball challenge. It’s rare that a season not only reuses very few challenges, but also sets the standard and creates the ideas that form the basis of later challenges, so Tocantins must be commended for that. While unable to do quite as much as “Survivor Gabon” in terms of scale, Tocantins was still very impressive, and more importantly, managed to keep that scale in later challenges after the merge, something that very few seasons get right. On top of that, Tocantins did a great job balancing its challenges. Nothing felt too repetitive, nothing felt like it had been done before in the same season, every challenge seemed fairly designed. However, for all these good points, Tocantins did have a few “odd duck” challenges that just felt very un-“Survivor”. For example, there was an immunity challenge that involved memorizing math symbols. Alright, memorizing numbers is one thing, but ARITHMATIC signs? That just doesn’t seem to fit to me. On top of this, it was GLARINGLY obvious when the season reused challenges, and while the original ones tended to be pretty good, it’s also worth noting that a lot of them have faded from consciousness over the years. For these reasons, I can’t score the season as high on challenges as I’d like to, but let it be said that when the season nailed the challenges, it REALLY nailed them, and that cannot be taken away from it.

Score: 7 out of 10.

TWISTS
Contrary to a lot of past seasons, Tocantins’ twists were few and far between. What WERE there were good, to be sure, but compared to the past couple seasons, this was very light. This in itself was a twist: a return to old-school “Survivor”. Sure there was Exile Island and the hidden immunity idol, but there were only 16 contestants, two tribes, no shakeup, and a merge at 10. Pretty standard fare, but it was nice to see a return to basics after so long.
Not that you’d know this was a return to basics by the leadup. While there were virtually no producer-implemented twists this season, what few producer-implemented twists there were got frontloaded into the season. Exile Island was back, of course, reusing the twist from “Survivor Micronesia” that sent two people of Exile Island each time pre-merge. A slight change up was that whomever was sent from the losing tribe picked someone from the winning tribe, rather than the winning tribe picking both people. Once again as well, the hidden immunity idol was hidden back at the camp, this time in the back of a statue by tree mail. Not the most original of twists, but another way to prevent Exile Island from getting too repetitive. It helped that there was some strategy changeup due to this twist, as this was how Taj and Brendan were able to form their cross-tribal alliance early in the game, and the intrigue of how to keep it up and who to send to Exile Island made for a lot of interesting episodes.
Probably the one twist that flopped was the mutiny. With two people at Exile Island, each had the option of switching tribes, a similar offer to the ones made in “Survivor Thailand” and “Survivor Cook Islands”, but without the time limit. As with “Survivor Thailand”, no one was dumb enough to take it, nothing came of it, and while it wasn’t bad, it was pretty pointless.
Rounding out the producer-implemented twists was the “first impressions” twist. After another salvage operation opening, each tribe was asked to select one member to not make the hike to camp with them. Presuming they were voting someone out, each tribe selected their weakest member. Jalapao selected Sandy for her age, and Timbira selected Sierra due to her sickness. It was then revealed that these people would instead be flown to camp, and have a chance to redeem themselves. While calling it the “first impressions” twist was a bit corny, it was an effective fake out for the contestants, and fun to watch for everyone else. It helped that Sandy and Sierra, once they reached the camps, had a choice to either search for a special hidden immunity idol that was good at the first tribal council, or try to improve their impression by building a shelter. Sandy looked for the idol, while Sierra built a shelter. Neither method was very effective, but both avoided being first out, which was nice to see. Both overcame their impressions well, though to varying degrees of success, as Sandy didn’t last more than one tribal council beyond the first. Still, good to see that preconceptions could be shattered.
After this we entered a dry spell. The trouble is that threesomes on each tribe (J.T., Stephen, and Taj for Jalapao, Coach, Tyson, and Debbie for Timbira) controlled the vote pretty well, meaning that there were almost no blindsides pre-merge. The exception might be Spencer Duhm, at the time the youngest contestant ever, but even he had some inkling of what was happening.
No, nothing much really happened until we got to the merge, where we once again had a twist overload. First, we got another evacuee in Joe, whose knee became too infected for him to continue in the game. It was a nice reminder that the game was real, and while it’s always disappointing to see someone leave without being voted out, Joe made very little impact on the game, so from a viewer’s perspective, not a huge loss. But THEN! First Brendan is blindsided, due to Coach’s delusions of grandeur, then Stephen, J.T., and Taj manage to pull in Erinn and change the course, blindsiding a no longer immune Tyson in place of Sierra. Then, to appease Coach and Debbie, Sierra is voted out anyway. This upset is the highlight of the season, and deservedly so. It helped cement the underdog story of Jalapao, and created excitement where there was none. Best twist of the season.
Sadly, this led to a dry spell of twists. There was a minor producer-implemented one at the reward auction, when Taj, having bought a visit from her husband, sent herself and her husband to Exile Island, and in return getting everyone else’s loved ones out, which was nice, but similar to twists before it.
The finals were also a bit chaotic, as J.T. and Stephen turned on longtime ally Taj as a jury threat, but even then, the obvious final two of Stephen and J.T. came to be. It DID give us an interesting, if landslide, Tribal Council in which Stephen, despite being fairly well-liked, was lambasted compared to the comparatively loyal J.T., particularly after Stephen honestly admitted that he would not have taken J.T. to the finals, and J.T. put up a great show (of pure B.S.) about how put out he was, and how this ruined the friendship. Finally, J.T.’s perfect run was pretty cool to see, and went to a deserving guy.
While I admit most of the twists were good, they were just too infrequent to really give this section a good score. However, I will give it credit that there was barely a stinker amongst the twists.

Score: 5 out of 10.

OVERALL
Theme-wise, Tocantins didn’t have a lot to work with. True, it was better than “Generic South Pacific Island”, but somehow the culture just didn’t feel that distinctive, particularly after “Survivor The Amazon”, which was filmed in the same country. Still, it made up for this with a dramatic and evocative landscape, so I give it a pass.
Looking back, I think I can see why I had a harder time liking Tocantins at first, along with a lot of others. It was a slow start of a season with overall fewer characters. Compared to, for example, “Survivor Gabon”, not a lot happened in the early episode. Granted, once the merge came and things started happening, it was exceptional, but it just seemed like a case of “too little, too late.” Further, for people like me who were more recent fans, and not accustomed to the “twist lite” attitude of early seasons, this one felt lazy. Now that I have more appreciation for “twist lite” seasons, I can respect Tocantins a lot more for what it did. I should add that it was a very well-executed season, where applicable.
I think the big thing that time gives us, though, is perspective, and that also makes this season go up in my estimation. As I said before, at the time Tyson and particularly Coach were the most heavily-promoted aspects of the season. I didn’t like them, and so thought negatively of the season. Five years hence, however, I find that what I remember most is the relationship between J.T. and Stephen, which I really loved, and so I look on the season more fondly. Stretching a bit further, one could argue that camaraderie was the theme of the season, and due to the cast, it fit very well. While each individual aspect of the season may not have performed as well as others, combined, they made for a great season.

SCORE: 31 out of 40.

ABSTRACT
Fans of the more modern, producer-twist-heavy “Survivor” may have a hard time getting into this one, and will certainly be taken aback by the sparseness of it. If you can get past a slow pre-merge, however, you’ll find an engaging and (mostly) likeable cast that’s a nice throwback to the early days of “Survivor”. Given the chance, I’d say watch this one if you can.