Idol Speculation: “Survivor 43” Episode 3: A Leg Up

Yeah, yeah, I know it’s a cheap joke, and maybe not in the best of tastes.  But Noelle is kind of a badass in a number of ways this episode, and if the joke is good enough for Chris Daugherty (“Survivor Vanuatu”), then it’s good enough for this blog.  

Reminiscing about Vanuatu aside, we actually can’t start off the blog for this episode just yet.  You see, it’s time once again for another edition of…

MATT’S MESS-UP!

This is an incredibly minor one in the grand scheme of things, but since I did make a point to joke about it, I feel compelled to correct myself.  The special area between Jesse and his wife, now shared with Dwight as well, is the “Pineapple ZONE” not the “Pineapple ROOM”.  Again, minor distinction, but I feel the need to mention it nonetheless.  I still say my Spongebob joke holds water, though.  

Trouble abounds in the Pineapple Zone, however, as after Jesse and Cody celebrate everything at the last Tribal Council going their way, Jesse admits that he may have burned the bridge with Dwight by not clueing him in ahead of time as to the outcome of Tribal Council.  No, really, you think?

Sure enough, we see that Dwight is not pleased with Jesse, in talking to Noelle.  Jesse, while still wanting to work with Dwight, admits that the “Divorce Papers” are ready to be signed on his end, if need be.  Dwight, however, is not ready for a full separation yet, though perhaps a trial one.  He admits being burned by Jesse, but expresses hope that they can still work together in the future.  

Now, I’m all for not being too butthurt when you’re on the losing side of Tribal Council, but this may be taking it a step too far.  Don’t blow up at Jesse, certainly, but don’t just put all your hopes on him.  Bond with Noelle to become another tight twosome, and try and convince Cody to go for Jesse, since he’s now proven untrustworthy.  Better yet, if he’ll go for it, try and have Cody let Nneka go for challenge performance,  Then you’ve got the tightest twosome left on the tribe, and you’re set.  About the only overture we see of this for now is Dwight and Noelle becoming tight with each other.  A good start, but they say they hope Jesse goes with them, a strategy that relies too much on Jesse for my liking.  

Over at Dumbass, we see that Gabler is still not doing too well, sleeping on the beach apart from the rest of the tribe.  Per the tribe’s report, this is due to him not handling things well mentally right now.  This, in the eyes of Elie, makes him a liability, and thus she wants him gone next.  However, there is still the wrinkle of the idol, as there’s little doubt that Gabler won’t play it at the next Tribal Council.  He doesn’t seem like the type to hold it for a keepsake or a bluff down the road.  

But what if he didn’t play it?  Elie and Jeanine suggest that, since THEY were confused by the wording on Gabler’s clue before re-reading it, perhaps Gabler could be confused into believing his idol no longer worked.  Thus, in the presence of Sami, they suggest talking to Gabler as though his idol is no longer good, presumably banking on him not, you know, looking at the instructions he has free access to to double-check.  Kind of a flimsy plan, but hey, stranger ones have happened.  Look how many times Shan on “Survivor 41” was able to get her tribe to act against their own self-interest to her benefit?  Spin a tale like that, and there’s a chance it could work.  

Good as Elie is, though, she does not quite have Shan’s charisma, nor is Dumbass tribe as gullible as most of Ua that season, despite my joke name for them.  When Sami asks Gabler about his idol, Gabler correctly notes that it’s good for one more Tribal Council.  Sami then clues Gabler in on the women’s plan, informing him of the search of his bag in the process.  Gabler is infuriated that they went through his bag.  Not sure exactly why, apart from the two supposedly being in an alliance.  That part may be justified, but indignity at the bag search itself, not so much.  This has been staple “Survivor” play since “Survivor The Australian Outback”, and only become more common with the addition of idols and advantages.  Feels to me like most of the stigma went out the window a long time ago.  But hey, Gabler’s the victim here.  He’s entitled to his feelings.  And as Gabler says, he’s not an idiot, and so when Elie enacts her plan, Gabler plays along like he really does think his idol is no good anymore, to Elie’s satisfaction.  All while the men plot their demise.  Why must every psychologist on this show who isn’t Denise Stapley (“Survivor Philippines”) suck?

Things are much more pleasant over at Coco, where James’ birthday is in show.  We even hear a bit of the tribe singing him the “Happy Birthday” song, something I’m amazed the show’s copyright-averse lawyers let through.  Cassidy talks about how things are one big happy tribe, but how that feeling is likely to go at some point.  James even muses about going to the rocks to look for an idol at some point, though Lindsay notes the stigma should anyone leave camp.  And so, they all sit around looking at each other.  Boston Rob (“Survivor Marquesas”) would be proud.  

Of course, things have to change eventually, and Karla spies her chance before long.  Lindsay, Cassidy, and Ryan are all out fishing, while James it taking a nap.  No mention of what Geo is up to, but perhaps since he thinks Karla’s on his side, he doesn’t care.  Either way, Karla goes off idol-hunting, wisely checking all the significant-looking trees.  With what seems very little effort (though admittedly this advantage was more well-hidden than the one on Vesi.  This one was less brightly-colored, as well as higher up the tree.), Karla finds a Beware Advantage, and debates with herself whether to risk it or not.  She describes herself as having played the “slow and steady” game so far, but acknowledges that she needs to take a risk at some point.  She’s just not sure if this is that point and, in a first for the show, puts the Beware Advantage back without opening it.  

I’m of two minds about this decision.  On the one hand, Karla has the LEAST to risk by potentially losing her vote on this tribe.  As the swing vote, it is unlikely that she would be targeted at the first few Tribal Councils this season, barring being a contributing factor to some challenge loss.  True, this does limit her power to determine the outcome, but an idol down the line can make up for that.  Plus, that assumes you’re GOING to Tribal Council, something that doesn’t seem to be on the horizon for Coco yet.  Not a safe assumption, but then you could also argue that it’s going to be a while before even the next immunity challenge, so Karla has the time (and the social capital) to figure things out.  As such, not going for the advantage baffles me from a strategic perspective.  

That said, however, Karla is out there and we’re not.  Perhaps there’s something we’ve not seen that makes Karla feel more at-risk in the tribe, and admittedly Karla has heard no silly phrases at a challenge yet, something she has to assume is still the case, all else being equal.  WE know about the bead thing from last episode, but KARLA doesn’t, and thus must assume she has to work with the other tribes to activate her idol and get her vote back, which she can’t guarantee at this time.  More than this, however, I applaud Karla for making the SMART move for her, not the FLASHY one.  If we assume that Karla has good reason to feel she’s at risk should the tribe lose, then going for the flash is an unnecessary risk.  Look how it nearly torpedoed Cody’s game last episode.  Karla does what she feels is best for her, and it’s hard for me to fault her for that.  Still, it would be a shame if she went back on that because it’s what she thought the audience would want.  

Back from commercial, we check in at Vesi, where the FEELS abound.  Nneka is talking about causes that are near and dear to her heart.  Specifically, she talks about a Nigerian refugee charity she works with.  It’s sweet stuff, and then for mood whiplash, you learn it was BURNED TO THE GROUND by some of the locals.  Jerks.  Anyway, Nneka says that’s what she wants to use her prize money for.  Short stuff, but sweet, and emphasized well by the flashback pictures.  

Can’t go too long without game talk, however, as Karla has decided to go BACK on what she said, and will instead do what she would tell someone on the tv to do.  Look, I’m all for changing your mind if you realize you did a dumb, and maybe that’s what Karla did but from what we’re shown, it’s her thinking like a viewer, rather than a player.  Fun for us, but from a strategy perspective, I can’t condone it.  First, Karla has a conversation with James about whether he would go for a Beware Advantage or not.  James kind of waffles, which Karla takes as a “go ahead” sign.  Why James isn’t immediately suspicious of this line of questioning, I don’t know, but the dude does appear to be half-asleep.  I’ll cut him the benefit of a doubt.  So, Karla finds out about the bead thing, and it’s not as natural for her as it was for Cody.  

Luckily for Karla, James was making a bracelet in relation to his birthday earlier, giving Karla the excuse to copycat the idea for her wife’s supposed birthday (which is actually in February).  James gives up his bead no problem, but Geo is oddly resistant to the idea.  Karla needs to trade him a bunch of her beads to get his one that she needs, but he does acquiesce in the end.  Still, this makes her believe she needs a different tack with Lindsay and Cassidy.  I’d say you could just come clean to them, to help save their alliance, but given that she didn’t with James, I guess she wants to keep the idol a secret, which I can’t fault too much.  Karla ends up trading an earring apiece to the women for their bead, which should throw up IMMEDIATE red flags for them!  Those were nice earrings!  Probably not too expensive, but giving up such a personal item for something so random as a bead seems, at best, problematic.  The women seem to buy it, though, so that just leaves Ryan.  

Like Geo, Ryan is reluctant to part with his beads.  Karla tries to do a “we’re exchanging keepsakes” thing, but when Ryan is only willing to offer her one of his socks (which, after a week without bathing, ew), she has to change tactics again.  This should ALSO make Ryan suspicious, but given that Karla’s tactic is to offer him something nice for his girlfriend in exchange, he eventually gives it up.  Thus, Karla has her vote back, and an idol no one knows about.  Not pulled off as flawlessly as Cody’s, but it seems to get the job done, and it’s tough to argue with results.  No matter how much you want to.  

Our challenge today is a carbon-copy of a couple of elements from “Survivor 42”.  Pretty sure some of the structures on the platforms are repainted ones from that season even.  Three tribe members swim to retrieve keys, one at a time.  They bring them to a platform, where the other two players use them to unlock a turtle puzzle they must solve.  The first two tribes to do so win immunity, as well as varying amounts of tools and fruit.  As standard and boring a challenge as you get in this era of the show.  

Even our misdirection can’t help us much.  I’ve seen weaker on the show, but this is not that great.  The trouble is two of our tribes, Dumbass and Vesi, have gotten strategic content this episode, while Coco has not.  Not a huge issue, so long as Coco dominates the challenge, but no!  They’re behind for most of it.  Thus, when Dumbass cruises to an easy victory, it’s clear Vesi is going back to Tribal Council, despite Coco being behind.  Once again, Nneka flubs the puzzle (and given she was the only common element in both puzzle portions, it’s clearly on her this time), just standing there watching while Coco pulls away.  

Really, the only cool part of this challenge was Noelle.  As she had to be on the swimming portion, and as we established that she can’t take her prosthetic in the water, she must go one-legged.  Not too bad overall but it will make one particular obstacle (getting up a series of crate stares before diving in) difficult.  Noelle, however, pulls it off effortlessly, or at least with no more effort than anyone else doing the challenge, and that’s pretty cool.  

But now, Dumbass must make a choice, choosing one person from each tribe to go off somewhere, presumably whatever the equivalent of “Shipwheel Island” is called this season, with each coming back before the next Tribal Council.  They choose Noelle from Vesi and James from Coco, while Owen volunteers for their own tribe.  As Owen is really the only one they have information on at this point, and he’s nominally on both sides (aligned with the men, but the women think he’s on board against Gabler), can’t fault them for not objecting too hard.  The gentlemen are kind enough to help Noelle hop one-legged into the boat, and I certainly hope that they’ll let her grab a new prosthetic before the island.  I don’t doubt James and Owen would be willing to help her, and the hike to the rock is not DIFFICULT per se, but doing it one-legged?  Brutal.  

Emotions remain the order of the day at Vesi.  Nneka breaks down about Noelle being the next to go, mostly because she’s not at camp to defend herself.  Everyone else, however, breaks down about the need to vote off Nneka.  While I don’t believe in making your tribe stronger by voting someone off (addition by subtraction, if you will), since there’s no guarantee anyone would do BETTER on a puzzle than Nneka, it can’t be denied that she’s earned a potential vote-off this episode after repeated poor challenge performance.  It may not help Vesi, but it certainly will hurt them the least in terms of challenges.  They also note that they have no more doubts about Noelle’s ability to perform in challenge.  You had doubts?  The woman’s a PARALYMPIAN for crying out loud!  Challenge performance from her should be the least of your concerns.  

Emotionally?  That’s another matter.  Nneka is the team mom that everyone likes.  Her boot is seen by nearly all as a cruel necessity.  Only Cody is on the fence, since Nneka is his ride-or-die.  Really, Cody’s the only one who shouldn’t want Nneka gone.  For Dwight and Noelle, they stay safe despite being the technical minority, while getting rid of Nneka keeps Jesse’s options open.  In his mind, he and Dwight are the power couple against the individuals of Cody and Noelle in this scenario.  Little downside for him.  

Over at The Island Formerly Known As “Shipwheel Island”, we see that production did deign to let Noelle put on another prosthetic.  Good thing too, since the island is going back to its roots and having them hike up a huge hill, something that, while not impossible, would probably have violated the Geneva convention if forced to be done missing one leg.  Noelle goes over the backstory of her leg, and again, can’t complain.  Relevant to what’s happening on screen.  

This trip really is Noelle’s time to shine.  The parchment before the hike tells them to get to know one another, but we really only see Noelle talking.  At first I’m inclined to dock her points for spilling the beans to people she barely knows, but she is on the bottom, and she doesn’t actually give away that much.  She doesn’t tell the alliances, but only truthfully says she was left out of the vote.  This serves to make her seem, not unfairly, like a free agent, and so the men are open to working with her come the merge.  Of course, they should say yes regardless, but it’s still decent maneuvering on her part.  She may not get much in return, but she hasn’t given away as much as it would seem at first blush.  

Oh, and nice though this alliance is, I have no faith that it will last.  These gunshot alliances fail more often than they succeed.  Our closest equivalent last season would be the Hai/Drea/Lindsay one, and look how well that turned out.  

The hike may have changed, but the mechanism remains the same.  Everyone picks risk or not risk, those risking drawing a parchment out of a corresponding bag that either had an advantage or a lost vote.  Sensing a need (so perhaps she doesn’t have as much faith in Jesse as it seemed), Noelle asked the men to forgo their shot so she can have a chance to make it through and work with them.  This is a no-brainer for Owen.  With the men needing all the numbers they can get, he can’t afford to risk his vote.  As he wasn’t going to risk anyway, why not get at least a good relationship for the future out of it?  James is a bit more complex, since, as a part of a solid majority where his vote is not strictly necessary, he COULD risk his vote, and it might be better for his game long-term to have an advantage.  Still, he’s in a solid position either way, and it’s hard to fault him too much for not wanting to rock the boat, even with two people he’s just met.  Noelle gets her parchment and all head back to camp.  

After offering to be searched, which no one takes her up on, Noelle reveals it would not have mattered anyway.  Her advantage was hidden in her prosthesis, good for her.  It’s no Kellee Kim Bun Hiding Place from “Survivor Island of the Idols”, but it’s a good one.  Less good is her advantage.  A vote steal, where Gabler got an idol.  True, she doesn’t know what Gabler has, this is still useful, and at least has the edge of not being time-limited that we hear.  This does make me wonder what determines the advantage, though.  I could see it being a “each trip is a different advantage” thing, but I could also see it being determined by the number of people who risk.  Only one person risking gets a relatively weak advantage, two gets stronger but time-limited, and three gets stronger than that type of thing.  Either is plausible, and I’m curious whether this will be clarified in further episodes.  

The one drawback to Noelle denying risking her vote and getting any advantage is that, come the time to use it.  That could potentially be soon, since Noelle could still be on the bottom.  Tribal Council, however, throws that possibility out the window.  With the somber tone, there’s little doubt that the person people like more will be gone, which is Nneka in this scenario.  The only individual moment worth commenting on is the rare bit of levity.  As a political science student, Jesse becomes living at the horrible scale his tribe uses when discussing their levels of nervousness.  

Yeah, misdirection is not this episode’s strong suit, and Nneka goes without Noelle needing to use her idol.  I’m mixed on this.  It was definitely the smart move, but while I don’t dislike Noelle, I just found Nneka more interesting, so I am sorry to see her go.  She takes it all with good grace, but it’s sad nonetheless.  

And that really hits at this episode’s strength: The emotion.  While not missing, the misdirection was lackluster at best, and with the shortened time frame from the past two episodes, coupled with time devoted to The Island Formerly Known As “Shipwheel Island”, we didn’t get a ton of strategy talk, and what we got was very uneven.  The show worked with what it had, though, and you really felt the weight of each moment, and the pain our contestants were going through.  Thus, while perhaps not as strong as the previous episodes, this one was still solid and gripping.  A good episode, and we hope for more and better in the future.  

-Matt

Title Credit to Jean Storrs.  

“Survivor” What-Ifs?: Island of the Idols

Ok, I know I usually start these “What If” blogs off fairly coy.  Talk a bit about how a given season was received, and whether we can make it better with one small change.  But there’s not beating around the bush here; it’s just not going to happen with this season.  In case you missed the title, we’re talking about “Island of the Idols”, arguably the most universally reviled season the show has ever produced.  And the causes of that revilement (the actions of Dan Spilo, and production’s responses to said actions) are not something that falls into the realm of my (admittedly self-imposed) restrictions on what changes I will examine.  All that said, there doesn’t mean there aren’t changes in the season worth talking about, and if you’ll permit me, we’ll take a stroll down this season to see what it is, and what it does.  

Also, consider this fair warning that there will be SPOILERS ahead.  It’s difficult to talk about changing how an event went down on a given season without talking about how it originally went down in our own timeline.  Moreover, I also talk about how such a change impacts seasons to come, so spoilers for the (admittedly few) seasons post-season-39, and potentially even a few from before that.  Now that you have been sufficiently warned, let us dig in.  

THE IMPACT

Our change comes to us fairly late in the season, and concerns everyone’s favorite advantage-finder, “Detective” Dean Kowalski.  In the penultimate episode of the season, Dean is sent to the titular “Island of the Idols”, where rather than an actual challenge or test in order to gain a powerful in-game item, Dean just has to get lucky in a coin-flip.  Whoop-De-Doo.  How could anyone possibly forget such an exciting contest, and random advantage in a season dedicated to giving out random advantages?  

Shade-throwing aside, Dean won a choice of three advantages in our timeline, going with an idol nullifier, probably the smartest of the three he could have picked, and as such, I don’t see him realistically choosing any advantage but that one.  Coin flips, however, fall perfectly under the purview of this blog, and so we can see how the outcome changes if Dean ISN’T so lucky in his coin flip.  

Yes, in this new timeline, Dean’s coin flip goes awry.  Instead of gaining an advantage, he loses his vote at the subsequent Tribal Council, the price for his gamble.  Now, fortunately for Dean, this is not an IMMEDIATE doom for his game.  In our timeline, Dean wins the subsequent immunity challenge, and as this coin flip and his performance in the challenge are unrelated, I don’t see any reason Dean doesn’t win said challenge in this new timeline.  His vote, while part of the majority, was also not needed for the ouster of Elaine this episode, so things so far seem ok for Dean.  Dan is still rightfully ejected at the end of the episode, and we move onto our finale, and the larger fallout from Dean’s failed gamble.  

THE FALLOUT

This is where the real meat of this change comes into play.  You see, Dean’s idol nullifier threw a wrench into the plan of Janet.  While she is still on the outs in this timeline, Janet had a hidden immunity idol to help make her way into the final four, where she would have had an edge due to her fire-making skills, demonstrated throughout the season.  She even played it correctly this episode!  The only thing stopping it from working was, you guessed it, Dean’s idol nullifier.  

Shock of all shocks, Janet is successful without an idol nullifier to block her path to the end.  She negates four votes against her, and her preferred target, Lauren, goes home.  At this point, all obstacles are out of Janet’s way.  Even if she didn’t manage to win immunity at the final four, that would merely mean that Noura, who won in our timeline, does so.  For Janet, it doesn’t even matter what happens now.  Whether she gets taken to the end by Noura, or she beats someone in fire-making, she’s all but guaranteed to face a jury that frankly is in love with her, and probably couldn’t wait to hand her the prize money.  If you were to ask me the most likely path here, I’d say Noura probably still takes Tommy to the end, and lets Dean and Janet battle it out for fire making.  Apart from matching up with what we know happened in our timeline, Noura would want Janet out (as would most everyone still in the game), and would thus be sure to put her into fire making.  She’d want the best chance of getting Janet out, and so, since Tommy did such a good job of selling himself as not good at fire, Dean goes in.  Janet, as mentioned before, beats him, and so our final three is now Janet, Noura, and Tommy.  

As mentioned before, Janet is pretty much guaranteed to win this jury.  I don’t want to say she’d have a unanimous victory (I could see people like Lauren and Missy giving Tommy a vote for example), but I don’t see any scenario where Janet doesn’t win.  She was perceived as a threat if she got to this point, was super-likable, and was about the only person who came out looking good from the Dan situation.  Yeah, no way Janet is not winning against this jury.  

THE LEGACY

For the first time in one of these blogs, there’s really not much of anything to talk about in terms of how this changes returnees and returnee seasons.  We’re so late in the “Survivor” overall timeline (at least at the time of this writing) that the only returnee season would be “Winners at War”, filming immediately after this season wrapped.  While Janet is a beloved winner in this timeline, and doubtless both the audience and the producers want her back (more so the former, since the latter probably want to forget this season exists overall), the timing just doesn’t work out.  There’s probably some grumbling from people who don’t understand the shooting schedule as to why Janet wasn’t invited back for that season, but it’s not a huge controversy.  If you wanted me to reach for some change that happens to a later season, I’d say MAYBE the show decides that, given how little impact/excitement came from Dean’s coin flip, they decide this is not a good method for advantages in future seasons.  If so, Michele, for example, might have gone out earlier in “Winners at War” without her coin flip, and things like that.  Really, though, given the show’s propensity to run a bad idea into the ground before admitting it was a bad idea and giving up on it, I’d be somewhat surprised if we even got this.  

No, the big changes down the line are in how various aspects of the season are perceived.  Obviously Janet is beloved in our timeline, and she’s even more beloved as a winner.  Her hype only increases, and I would expect her to be a lock for any future returnee seasons after “Winners at War”, assuming they allow pre-“Survivor 41” contestants back on those.  Conversely, without his glut of advantages to land him in the finals, I suspect Dean falls into obscurity, talked about only as a curiosity, and “What If” scenarios trying to come back to the timeline we know.  Lauren gets slightly more love that she does in our timeline, due to her exit being seen as more “cheap” than in ours, and gets a lot of love as a great strategist taken out by advantages rather than bad play on her part.  And, if we’re talking about perceptions around the show, I doubt the idol nullifier gets as much hate as it does for us now, since we’d only have Carl’s example on “Survivor David vs. Goliath”, aka an example people actually LIKE.  Thus, people start to wonder why it hasn’t really returned (unseen one Omar had on “Survivor 42” notwithstanding), not realizing the proverbial bullet they have dodged.  

The big change, though, is Tommy.  Of course he’s no longer the winner as he is in our timeline.  Yet, oddly, I feel like we would have seen more of him in the season than we did in our timeline.  This is, admittedly, speculation on my part, but I think a lot of the reason Tommy got such little content period was due the show oddly wanting to distance their winner from the season he won.  They could tell pretty much everyone (save Janet and Kellee) would come off looking some degree of “bad”, and so tried to minimize this for their winner.  The issue is that they did this by sucking everything entertaining away as well.  Without his win, there’s not need to make Tommy look like a perfect angel, and thus, they’re free to show more of him, the good and the bad.  “Teaching Time with Tommy” becomes a regular feature of the episodes, or at least as common as Rick Devans’ news updates on “Survivor Edge of Extinction”, and we probably get to hear more of his thoughts on the Dan situation, particularly more about how Dan factored into Tommy’s strategy.  Still, even now he’s not one of the bigger characters on the season, though he might still come back on “The Challenge”, since placement/character on “Survivor” seems to have little to do with who gets on that particular show.  

I said at the outset that we could not make this a good season with this change, and I stand by that.  By the time we’re able to make this particular timeline change, the damage is already done.  Janet’s win will not undo the ugliness of Dan’s actions, and how those actions were handled.  Still, I can see Janet’s win being the “One Redeeming Quality” this season has.  Much as strategy nerds like me love Tommy for winning without ever having individual immunity or an idol/advantage, the most exciting winner he was not.  Because he was so hidden, we didn’t get to know him very well, and thus the audience at large did not connect with him.  Janet, however, comes off well no matter what.  Since we still see so much of her in this timeline, her win is seen as the one good aspect of the season.  Think of it like Kim Spradlin’s victory on “Survivor One World”.  The season as a whole is still garbage, but at least the end result was satisfying.  The main difference, of course, is that “Survivor One World” is merely a poorly-produced season with a terrible overall cast, while “Survivor Island of the Idols” is actively painful and/or triggering for most of the audience, and thus the latter is much more reviled, and rightly so.  Even with that, however, Janet rises above all as something most of the fanbase loves.  

Well, perhaps a weird beginning, but it’s good to be back to these “What-If” blogs!  They’re honestly some of my favorites to write, and I’d like to do more of them moving forward.  That’s where your help comes in!  While I’ve always got a few scenarios running around in my head, there’s room for more.  As such, I want to hear from you what scenarios you’d like to see me cover on this blog!  Leave your submissions in the comments of this blog, or on whatever website linked you to this blog.  Credit will be given if your idea ends up being used.  That said, do be aware that there are some guidelines for getting your preferred scenario considered.  These are listed below:

1. One Change Only: This can’t be a whole bunch of things or multiple things going another way to alter the course of a season.  This must be one singular event that alters the season in some way.  Cascade effects, where one change naturally leads to another, are ok, but they have to be natural and logical.  As an example, Shii-Ann not flipping and Chuay Gahn losing the final 10 immunity challenge on “Survivor Thailand” would definitely change things, but those are two independent changes that need to happen, and therefore not appropriate for this blog.  I should also mention that the change has to be an EVENT, not a play style.  Yes, “Survivor Heroes vs. Villains” probably goes much differently if Russell Hantz (“Survivor Samoa”) isn’t an asshole to everyone, but apart from that never happening, it’s a change in overall play style, not a single moment.  It’s also, as I say, implausible, which leads to my next ground rule…

2. The Change Must Be Realistic: An unlikely change is ok, but it has to be something that COULD have happened, or it’s not worth writing about.  Yes, Fang winning the first immunity challenge on “Survivor Gabon” would drastically change the season.  Would it ever happen?  No.  So there’s no point in writing about it.  

3. The Change Must Have An Impact: By this, I mean the change has to actually alter the season in some significant way.  Simply changing up the boot order is not enough.  Someone new has to win, the perception of the season has to change, or both.  As an example, I originally planned to do a blog on “Survivor Heroes vs. Villains”, with a timeline where Candice didn’t flip at the final 9.  I thought this could lead to a Heroes victory.  Then I remembered that Russell Hantz plays his idol in that same episode, meaning the flip most likely doesn’t matter, and apart from a slight boot order change, the season as a whole remains untouched.  Uninteresting, and therefore not worth talking about.  

In addition to these hard-and-fast guidelines, there are also what I call “Flexible Guidelines”.  As the name would imply, these can be bent with a compelling arguments, but they are things that should be borne in mind when suggesting new situations to examine:

4. US Seasons Only: This is nothing against international seasons of “Survivor”.  From what I’ve heard through the grapevine, they can be quite good.  The trouble is, as a citizen on the US, the US version of “Survivor” is the one I’m most familiar with, know the most about, and have seen the most of.  I haven’t even seen a full international season of “Survivor”, just the occasional clip.  Nothing knocking them, of course.  I just haven’t gotten around to viewing them.  So, while I won’t outright ban the suggesting of changes from non-US seasons of “Survivor”, bear in mind that I’m unlikely to pick them due to a lack of knowledge and lack of time to catch up on the seasons.  

5. I Will Not Do Brandon Flipping At The Africa Final 9: A flip by Brandon Quinton at the Final 9 of “Survivor Africa”, voting out Lex instead of Kelly, would indeed fit all the criteria mentioned above.  I’m refusing this particular scenario, not because it isn’t interesting or worth talking about, but because it was already covered by Mario Lanza in his book “When it Was Worth Playing For”.  He covered it so well and so thoroughly that I don’t think I would have anything to add.  I’m willing to consider this scenario if someone can give me a compelling reason that Mario is wrong, or there’s some aspect he didn’t consider, but until that time, this scenario is out.  Other “Survivor Africa” scenarios are ok, though.

6. Try Not To Repeat Seasons: This is by far the most flexible of the flexible guidelines, particularly as many seasons have multiple inflection points with a fascinating change to dissect.  However, to prevent a lot of repetition, I try and prioritize scenarios from a season I haven’t done a “What-If?” on yet, over ones that I’ve already covered one scenario on.  You can feel free to submit scenarios for seasons I’ve already looked at, but bear in mind that I’m unlikely to cover them until I’m out of ideas for “What-Ifs?” on seasons I haven’t done yet.  For reference, at the time of this writing, I have done scenarios from the following seasons: Marquesas, Pearl Islands, All-Stars, Palau, Guatemala, Exile Island, Micronesia, Gabon, Samoa, Heroes vs. Villains, Redemption Island, Philippines, Blood vs. Water, Game Changers, Island of the Idols.  

I look forward to seeing your submissions, and giving you more blogs during the off-season.  Take care out there!

-Matt

Idol Speculation: Updated Season Rankings

Happy New Year, everybody! We can hope for a lot of things in 2020, but one thing is certain: “Survivor” will air its 40th season, leading to a grand total of 20 years on the air so far. For good and for ill, and whatever problems the current incarnation of the show may have, this is no small feat. As such, it should be commemorated, making it the perfect excuse to bring you all my updated season rankings! I’d been wanting to do this for a while, so I’m very happy to present you with my subjective opinion on how each season compares to the others. Some of the answers may surprise you.

Before we begin, however, I should note a slight change from the last time I did these. Before, I divided seasons into overall categories within the rankings, and I intend to do so again. However, I’ve added a fourth category in there as well. Rather than explain to you these categories as they come up, I’m going to explain what each general category means overall, then just present the seasons in that category as we make our way up the list. In ascending order, the categories are as follows:

The Bad-Contrary to what the name might indicate, this name does not mean the seasons as a whole are bad overall. Even if they were, “Survivor” is often in another category compared to most scripted television, so even these seasons can be better than a lot of what comes on. These are just the seasons that don’t work for whatever reason, and that I really have no desire to watch again.

The Ugly-Our new category, this one was made in the wake of “Survivor Island of the Idols”. Sad though it is to say, we now have enough seasons with socially controversial elements to merit their own category. The quality of these seasons varies, and were it not for said controversial element, could end up anywhere on the list. I wouldn’t feel right putting them low on the list just because of these elements, but wouldn’t feel right putting them high because of the presence of these elements. As such, they get their own separate category that keeps them low, but acknowledges that the seasons themselves may or may not have redemptive elements.

The Good-This is pretty much standard “Survivor” fare that people would come to expect. Seasons that are not stand-out on their own, or have some sort of problem keeping them from being truly great, but are still enjoyable, and I wouldn’t mind the occasional rewatch.

The Great-As you would expect, these are the seasons that are fantastic. They elevate the game, are engaging and entertaining, or all of the above. They are legendary, the ones that to me scream “Survivor”, and that I never get tired of rewatching.

Well, with that business out of the way, let us waste no more time, and start talking about how the seasons stack up! There will, of course, be spoilers for these seasons, so tread with caution if you are not up to date on “Survivor” history.

THE BAD

39. “Survivor Edge of Extinction”: Yes, the bottom spot has finally been usurped by a recent season, after “Survivor Fiji” reigned king for so long, seemingly never to be dethroned. But for all my gripes about “Survivor Fiji”, I will at least say this: it served a purpose. There was a reason for us to follow the entire journey. The win of Chris Underwood means that this cannot be said for “Survivor Edge of Extinction”. Now, don’t misunderstand, Chris is by no means a bad winner in and of himself. He seems like a perfectly nice guy, and he did play extremely well following winning his way back into the game. Nor would I say that Chris’ win is illegitimate due to the “Edge of Extinction” twist. We as an audience may not like it, but that alone does not mean it was not a part of the game to be utilized. By all accounts, Chris utilized it well, building bonds with his fellow players there that ultimately earned him the jury vote. No, the problem that Chris’ win creates is that it makes the season retroactively pointless. Pretty much everything we see on screen that led to his win happened IN THE LAST FREAKING EPISODE! Oh, his entire game up until that point HAD an impact on his victory, but since “Edge of Extinction” got maybe 5 minutes out of an episode, and most of that devoted to the scavenger hunt of the day, we never got to see it. That makes “Survivor Edge of Extinction” pointless to watch. If I can get everything I need to know about the season out of the last episode, why should I bother to watch it. Even if you’re generous and say that you need to watch the first three episodes where Chris was in the game, that’s still only about 1/3 of the episodes that actually contribute to the overall story. Look, I get that the producers were in a bit of a spot with “Edge of Extinction”. They couldn’t show us too much of it, for fear that it would give away that someone returning to the game would win, but by not showing us enough, we don’t really follow what Chris did to win. Rather than feeling like a journey to the end, this season felt like it was a waste of time. I could complain about other aspects of this season that really did it no favors. Everything from how Chris had no risk in his game while on “Edge of Extinction” to the emphasis on returnees and Rick Devans at the expense of pretty much everyone else, to even the underwhelming challenges, but really, the pointlessness says it all for me. If 2/3 of your episodes don’t contribute to your story, what’s the point in me watching them?

38. “Survivor Fiji”: Just because this season has had it’s long standing title of “Worst season ever” usurped doesn’t mean my opinion of it has gone up. It’s just that the winner did have to be at risk for most of the game, and did have a journey we got to follow, so by definition it is not the worst. But MAN, does this season have issues. I’m willing to forgive a poor twist idea (such as the Outcasts from “Survivor Pearl Islands”) if it was an obvious idea that had to be tried at least once, but “Haves vs. Have-Nots” was not such a twist. It was a dumb question no one asked, but had an obvious answer: the Haves will kick the butt of the Have-Nots because people who aren’t starving and dehydrated tend to be better competitors than those who are. But that alone is not “Survivor Fiji”’s only problem. The cast, as a whole, is forgettable. With the exception of one or two names, I really can’t remember who was on this season. As you’d imagine, this is not a good thing. Yau-Man is really the only person I would say who stands out from the cast, and he was so obviously marketed as the breakout star of the cast that I just had an adverse reaction to him on principle. But the kicker for me, though, is the manner of eviction for Michelle Yi, which I would argue is the most unfair eviction in “Survivor” History. If you’re going to do a Tribal Council with no strategizing beforehand, fine. Not a huge fan of the idea, but I can understand the principle. But then, don’t immediately throw out the idea by having a line of questioning DESIGNED to make a target clear to everyone. Ugh, Michelle may not be the person I most want to see play again, but I’d argue she’s the most deserving of a second chance. The cherry on top of an already terrible sundae that is this season.

37. “Survivor Redemption Island”: Lots of fans have this as the worst season ever, and frankly, I have a hard time arguing against the idea. While I don’t think much on “Survivor” is sacrosanct, I am of the opinion that the doctrine of “Once the decision is made, the decision is final.” is, and should therefore not be violated. Any season with a theme centered around violating this doctrine is on my bad side automatically. This season is not helped by the fact that the returnees, Boston Rob and Russell, were clearly designed to dominate this season. The twist favored them, and a lot of the cast favored them as well, to the point that, even though the season was not pointless, it felt that way, since the victory of Boston Rob was presented as just that inevitable. It’s a slog to get through, there’s no denying that, but apart from “Redemption Island” itself, there’s no production aspect that makes me want to tear my hear out. Plus, we get to see Russell finally voted out, and be very ungracious about it as well, which is a minor redemptive factor no season on this list has so far.

36. “Survivor One World”: Similar to “Survivor Redemption Island”, the big flaw here is just that one person so dominates the show that there’s no mystery as to who the victor is. Kim Spradlin is my first correct winner guess, though that’s not saying much, considering she was leagues ahead of pretty much everyone else on the season in terms of gameplay. Like Boston Rob, she dominated to the point where there was no enjoyment, since the outcome was virtually a given from the beginning. The fact that it was fresh blood dominating, rather than someone on their fourth try, made it somewhat more impressive, and the lack of “Redemption Island” also helped make the season slightly better. I’ll even say that I like the idea of the “One World” twist, and think it needs another shot. Really, the drawback this time was the reuse of the “gender division” twist, since it created such animosity that the tribes didn’t work together to build one camp. I get that it made it easier to remember who was on what tribe, but that’s what buffs are for. Try it again with mixed-gender tribes, I say. You might get different results. As it stands, “Survivor One World” gave us the rise of a great strategist, but that’s about it. Plus, Colton Cumbie. There’s another mark in the “minus” column.

35. “Survivor Nicaragua”: Unlike the first three entries on this list, there was nothing about “Survivor Nicaragua” that made it have to be this bad. Granted, like “Haves vs. Have Nots” twist, this season dividing the tribes by age had an obvious outcome (the young kick the butt of the old), but was an obvious idea that had to be tried at least once. The cast was not inherently unexciting either. However, unpleasantness quickly crept into the season, with the contestant with a prosthetic leg getting picked on, and a lot of bullying in general. When you have two members of the dominant alliance quit nearly 30 days into the season, though, you’re in trouble. Whatever the behind-the-scenes reasons may be, the fact is that to the audience, it looked like they wimped out, especially when the left on the heels of the major strategists of the season getting eliminated. The event was awful, but the timing was worse. Culminating in frankly an idiot winning out in the end, this season basically just collapsed in on itself, and is really disappointing, given its potential.

34. “Survivor Samoa”: Do you like Russell Hantz? No? Well too bad, because that’s all you’re getting! Innovative though he was to the game (idol hunting without a clue wasn’t a thing before him), the fact is that it’s hard for one character alone to carry a season. Note the failure of seasons like “Survivor One World” and “Survivor Redemption Island”, who also had one character dominate above others. When that character is Russell Hantz, who is, shall we say, controversial, you’ve got an issue with your season. I’m not saying that Russell shouldn’t have been prominent, since he was a major driving force of the season. I’m saying that he shouldn’t have been so to the exclusion of the other players. Can you actually remember anything about any of the other players of the season? Apart from Russell Swan nearly dying, and Shambo being random, I’m guessing not. Some characters will rise to prominence above others, but “Survivor”, at its core, is an ensemble show. When you don’t have that, the season just fails. I will give credit, though, that this season does have something for everyone. If you like Russell, this is the season for you. If, like me, you hate him, the season is nearly impossible to get through, but that comeuppance at the end is oh so sweet.

THE UGLY

33. “Survivor Game Changers”: When I was putting seasons into this new category, I had to decide whether to rank these seasons as seasons, or based on how awful their controversial element was. To a greater or lesser degree, all these seasons are defined by their awful element, but in the end, I felt it would be a disservice not to talk about the season as a whole. And man, even without the whole Varner/Zeke incident, this season did not have legs, and I’m not even talking about the usual complaints. I for one, while not happy with the boot order, did not find it as awful as others did, and I even forgive Advantagegeddon to a certain degree. True, I wish that production put in less idols and advantages, but to be fair, people had chances to play most of them beforehand, and at least one play was based on social manipulation (Aubry had to convince Tai to play an idol for her, after all). Still, production is largely to blame for what makes this season so weak overall. The editing is garbage, making certain characters, including one of the final three, all but invisible, ON A RETURNEE SEASON! THIS SHOULD NOT HAPPEN ON A RETURNEE SEASON! For production’s second sin, we have the twists. In my opinion, returnee seasons should have the FEWEST twists of any other season, since returning players alone should be a draw. Maybe add ONE new game-shake-up in order to keep them on their toes, but no more than that. Instead, every two or three episodes, something new came in that the players had never dealt with before. What this led to was an unstable season. No status quo could be set up, thus giving the shake-up less impact and making the season hard to follow. And, if our favorites aren’t going to get as much screentime, why should we follow it?

32. “Survivor Worlds Apart”: I almost didn’t put this season in this category, since the controversial element is borderline at best. However, when I think back on this season, what I remember is the bullying of Shirin, and in particular the comments made by Will Sims II. While maybe not to the same scale as some of these other issues, to me, bullying is up there with some of the worst offenses, and so it goes on this list. The season as a whole? Not great. There were big characters, certainly, but most of them were more unpleasant than anything, which is not something we want to watch, as a whole. The strategy was mediocre at best, and the “Collars” twist was forced and added nothing to the show. Mike winning his way to the end via immunity was a nice novelty, but again, not the most compelling television, and unfortunately I think the network was staking a lot of the goodwill towards the season on people liking him. Mike wasn’t the worst, but he had his cocky moments, and so never really fully fit the “hero” archetype. There wasn’t really any one big problem with “Survivor Worlds Apart”, but the general unpleasantness with nothing to distract from it just drags down the season as a whole.

31. “Survivor Thailand”: “Survivor Thailand” is a bit of an oddity for me. I love the aesthetic, and I love just how thoroughly winner Brian Heidik dominated the game. It has that “classic era” feel that just makes me want to love it. But the fact is that “Grindgate” is the main thing that comes to mind when one thinks of this season, and the politics over how it was resolved were controversial at the time. In the modern day? Downright insulting. Our first straight Pagonging since “Survivor Borneo” didn’t help things either. The cast overall was pretty cool, but a lot of the more interesting players went before the jury phase, and again, the outcome was so obvious that it made the season more of a slog than a journey. A slow trek through the slime few would want to take again.

30. “Survivor All-Stars”: Perhaps a controversial opinion, but I think people are a bit hard on this season. As someone who had only seen “Survivor Borneo”, “Survivor The Australian Outback”, and “Survivor Pearl Islands” before this season aired, this season got me pumped to find out about the players I had never seen before, and it was refreshing to see my favorites back again. I think a lot of people’s problem is that they try and judge this season as if it were any other season of “Survivor”. I try to judge it as a tribute to the previous seven seasons, and it fits a lot better. The producers throw a lot of things at the players, but no so much that it overwhelms seeing them again, and a lot of the design tributes and challenge tributes work very well. That said, this season has fallen the farthest of any season since my previous rankings, and it’s all due to how uncomfortable this season can be. Apart from people taking things EXTREMELY personally, there’s the fact that the Richard/Sue incident at the immunity challenge before Richard’s elimination has REALLY not aged well, and is a highlight of how producers mishandled such situations even back then. A fun tribute, but little else going for it.

29. “Survivor Island of the Idols”: For me, this is the season hurt the most by its controversy. This season was never going to be a top-tier season, just due to how disjointed the post-merge game was, but it had a lot going for it. The cast as a whole was well-developed and likable, with a good mix of characters and strategists. The pre-merge was incredibly exciting, with nary a boring episode in the lot. Even the “Island of the Idols” twist wasn’t too bad, and occasionally even brought some much-needed levity to the episodes. I applaud the producers for not over-using the idea. That said, the producers must now be lambasted by their overall poor handling of the Kellee/Dan situation. True, they got better by the time of the reunion, but the fact remains that, when we think back on this season, we’ll think back on the controversy, which is just not fun to think about. I hope this cast comes back for better seasons, since they do deserve it. As it stands, I cannot rank the season higher than this.

THE GOOD

28. “Survivor San Juan del Sur”: “Survivor San Juan del Sur” is a weird one for me. It’s just kind of there. Not bad enough for me to dislike it, but not good enough to produce strong feelings for me. Every good point is counterbalanced by a bad point. We reused the “Blood vs. Water” twist, but also got the return of “Exile Island”. We had a decently exciting pre-merge, but then one of the worst merges ever with an anticlimactic quit. We lost our two big strategists right after the merge, and got the equivalent of wonder bread to lead us through most of the post-merge, but ended with an above-average winner. I do think it is the rise of Jon “Wonder Bread” Misch that prevents this season being higher for me, and I still feel that Jeremy’s eviction was unfair from a viewer standpoint, with not enough foreshadowing to feel earned. That said, would I call this a bad season? Not really. There’s nothing to hate about it, but I just can’t find myself able to muster any other reaction than “Eh, it was ok.” I will say I like that on a season where the women were numerically disadvantaged due to a last-minute medical pull, it was three women in the end regardless, but other than that, this season fails to stand out. In a sense, it’s damned by faint praise, but it’s not bad either.

27. “Survivor South Pacific”: On paper, this one should be around the “Survivor Redemption Island” area of this list. It has many of the same hallmarks: Returnees dominating the game, and the return of “Redemption Island”. However, what saves this season for me is the cast. Yes, there’s a lot of blind loyalty to the returnees, but these people are better at thinking for themselves, to the point where the returnees actually don’t win in the end. Plus, they’re just damn entertaining. For good and for ill, they stand out more as characters and strategists that seasons further down on the list, and that just makes for a more fun watch as a whole. Mind you, the problems I mentioned above are still problems, but this season gets a reaction from me, which is more than I can say for “Survivor San Juan del Sur”, thus putting it here on the list.

26. “Survivor Heroes vs. Healers vs. Hustlers”: This is another season that’s difficult to talk about. Like “Survivor San Juan del Sur”, I can’t say much of it stands out, but unlike that season or “Survivor South Pacific”, I can’t say there’s anything I can particularly complain about this season. Yeah, the theme is a little forced, but that’s hardly something I can complain about, and while I don’t like Final Four Firemaking, I’m not going to blame this season just because something I don’t like was introduced in it. I know a lot of people complain about Ben’s win, and while I personally would have like the see Chrissy get a bit more respect, I’m of the opinion that the blame largely lies with the rest of the cast who, from what we saw, knew about Ben’s idol hunting but did nothing to stop him. And even if you don’t like him as a winner, Ben is at least a nice guy to have get the money. This season came and went, without leaving much of an impact, and was pretty much just another standard “Survivor” season.

25. “Survivor Marquesas”: If this were a list of the most historically important seasons, “Survivor Marquesas” would be near the top. I mean, the first totem-pole shake-up? How cool is that? And yes, “Survivor Marquesas” has a lot of interesting things happen in it. If only it happened to engaging characters. Oh, don’t misunderstand me, “Survivor Marquesas” has some great characters. Kathy is deservedly one of the all-time greats, and I maintain that it is a crime that Sean Rector hasn’t yet returned to the show. But the fact is, the vast majority of the interesting players were voted out pre-jury. Big things happened, but did not happen to players we much cared about. On top of that, while I haven’t been commenting on it much, visual aesthetic goes a long way for me in terms of making a season memorable. Most early seasons do well, but “Survivor Marquesas” is the exception. It’s just another South Pacific Island chain that doesn’t really distinguish itself from all the other seasons set on other South Pacific Island chains. Again, nothing bad about it per se, but it’s more of a plot-driven season than a character-driven season, and is all the less interesting for it.

24. “Survivor Exile Island”: While the theme of this season was also not the strongest, the atmosphere was. People tend to forget, since the twist became commonplace quickly, but Exile Island was really intimidating when it first came up, and no one knew what it was. That atmosphere prevails throughout the season, and serves to help it stand out in one’s memory. While the pre-merge is nothing to write home about, the post-merge gives us a fantastic story line, with Casaya’s repeated attempts to oust Terry Deitz. There was no real “villain” here, since there were legitimate reasons to root for either Terry or the Casayas. This kept the show engaging up until the end, and while not all of the cast was a big hit, it gave us some long-time memorable characters, including the aforementioned Terry, plus the likes of Cirie and Shane. It’s by no means legendary, but definitely has a lot to recommend it.

23. “Survivor Cook Islands”: Dividing the tribes by race was, shall we say, an ill-conceived idea, but one that was obvious enough that I won’t count it against this season. As a consequence of having the largest cast at the time (“Survivor Palau” also had 20 players to start with, but eliminated 3 in the first episode, which this season did not), a lot of players fell by the wayside, which is why the season is no higher. But this season, more than any other, exemplified the underdog story, with the Aitu Four managing to beat the odds and make it to the finals together. Seeing Godfather Yul’s masterful gameplay was a joy to watch, and I have little time for people saying his win was due to the then-overpowered Hidden Immunity Idol. Yes, it was a help to him, but Yul was able to use it as an effective threat, which not just anyone can do. The occasional Cao Boi, Flicka, and Ozzy help provide some moments of levity to the season, and an engaging underdog story make this season definitely one worth another watch.

22. “Survivor Ghost Island”: People tend to underrate this season, in my mind. I think the problem is that a lot of people quickly grew tired with the “Ghost Island” twist, though of better ways to do it, and were upset that these weren’t what the show went with. Fair enough, but if you stop thinking about what it could have been, and just look at what is, the twist isn’t that bad. The show was fairly conservative with adding in idols and advantages, and did keep things suitably ominous. As to the show as a whole? I won’t deny that the post-merge really brought this season down, since it was incredibly obvious that no one was going to stop the Domenick/Wendell pairing. That said, we had one of the more-exciting pre-merges, and while it was clear that either Domenick or Wendell would win, it wasn’t clear which of them would win, keeping at least some mystery up until the end. Maybe if you weren’t a big fan of either Domenick or Wendell it got grating, but as someone who really liked Wendell’s gameplay, it was a fun enough watch, even if I did wish for some better competition. The merge as a whole may not have been that great, especially since a lot of the bigger characters went out early, and some of the late game players were practically invisible, but the first tied final vote in “Survivor” history made for a solid and enjoyable finale for me. Not a perfect season by any stretch, but there are a lot more good points here than people give credit for.

21. “Survivor Millennials vs. Gen-X”: Conversely, this is a season I think gets overrated in a lot of people’s rankings. Don’t get me wrong: the cast overall is solid, and it has decent mystery as to the winner throughout. What really does this in for me is the theme. “Survivor” as a whole was really stretching for themes at this point, and this one in particular irked me. Both generations seemed to get high and mighty about their supposed superiority, and pretty much all the cast tried to force it into at least one confessional they had, which just irritates me. Add onto that the prominence of “dude-bros” a character type I’m not particularly fond of, and some low-key bullying in places, particularly of David, and this is not a season I’m likely to be super-fond of. That said, I cannot deny that this season has good points. Characters are more hits and misses overall, there’s some good strategy to be found, and most important, there’s no obvious winner. Hints are there, but up until the Final Tribal Council, you have no idea what the outcome will be, which goes for to keeping one engaged with the season, which is a major victory that keeps the season this high.

20. “Survivor The Australian Outback”: Aesthetic is the big thing that saves this season. There’s a number of good characters, some decent strategy for the early days, and a generally likable cast as a whole (Jerri Manthey at the time notwithstanding). But my God, from a modern standpoint, this season is predictable. There’s basically no shakeups, and everything just goes on in what is effectively a Pagonging from there on out. Not exactly compelling tv. So, why do I have this season this high? Frankly, it’s memorable. The cast is a big part of that, but above all else, those locales and those challenges stick in your mind. It may not be the best season of “Survivor”, but it sticks in your mind, which to me counts for a lot, and in this case elevates a lot of the more mediocre elements this season can bring.

19. “Survivor Heroes vs. Villains”: This may be the most controversial call yet on this list. “Survivor Heroes vs. Villains” is a lot of people’s favorite season of all time, and there’s clearly a reason why. This season has arguably the most exciting pre-merge the show has ever had, with underdog stories, idol plays, blindsides, and crazy moves all around. But it’s time for me to codify something I’ve been hinting at with some of my other judgments so far: Not every part of a season is created equal. While I’ll obviously take a season with good elements over bad, the fact is that an exciting post-merge is much more important than an exciting pre-merge. I can get through a boring pre-merge if I know I’ve got exciting things coming down the road, but a season that peaks early makes it hard to go on afterward. And for all the greatness that is the “Survivor Heroes vs. Villains” pre-merge, the post-merge, to me, is AWFUL! Oh, the merge itself is exciting, with the culmination of J.T.’s failure, but afterwards it just becomes the “Russell Hantz” show again, which after having a season full of that, I’m not ready to watch again. This is the only season where I’ve given up in the middle of a rewatch. The post-merge is just so frustrating, with Russell in such an easy position to be taken down, yet it doesn’t happen, that I couldn’t keep it up, and quit around Amanda’s boot. That said, this season is redeemed slightly by Sandra getting the last laugh, and again, that pre-merge is prime quality. Sadly for this season, for me, the quality is not where it needs to be. Plus, I felt it could have done more as a tribute season. Reused challenges and acknowledging players making it 100+ days is nice, but I could have done with them going more all-out in terms of call-backs.

18. “Survivor Caramoan”: Adding onto the blasphemy, I’ve now put a lot of people’s least-favorite season above a lot of people’s favorite season, and again my “Post-merge matters more” perspective comes into play here. I won’t deny, the pre-merge of “Survivor Caramoan” is garbage. Asshole characters like Shamar, and annoying characters like Phillip “Special Agent?” Shephard dominate, and unlike the previous “Fans vs. Favorites”, things don’t seem as evenly matched between the tribes. Plus, the less said about Brandon Hantz, the better. But that post-merge, man! A lot of the fat gets trimmed, and we get some fantastic strategizing, culminating in a great bookend to the story-arc of John Cochran. Plus, the invention of live Tribal Councils courtesy of Malcom Freberg. Yes, the reunion show was a mess, and Dawn deserved more respect, but it doesn’t take away from the engagement and excitement that is the machinations of the merged tribe. Controversial, but if you can get though the first part of the season, it really has some legs.

17. “Survivor Blood vs. Water”: This season brought us an innovative concept that worked out really well. This is probably the best season in terms of putting up first time players against returnees, in and of that the new players seemed to be of the same caliber of play as the returnees, and if Ciera had just timed things a bit better, or the rock draw had gone differently, might have won. There’s not as much mystery as on some seasons, but the outcome is not set in stone either, so the season has decent engagement overall. Some good moves, a lot of good characters, so why isn’t this season higher? Well, there’s two things about this season that stop me from putting it any higher. Apart from the rock draw, there’s not really a moment that stands out from this season, and the moves and boot order tend to blend together. I do like moments from this season, but just can’t recall them as easily as I could an iconic season. The big problem, however, is “Redemption Island”. Yes, it is better in this incarnation than in previous ones, due to how it played on the family dynamics, and how far people would go for their loved one. But the fact remains that “Redemption Island” as a twist takes up too much time, and violates the “Once the decision is made, the decision is final” doctrine. It’s the difference between eating a manure sandwich, and eating a manure sandwich with cheese. The latter is better, certainly, but still not good. I cannot, in good conscience, put a season with “Redemption Island” as a mainstay twist any higher than this.

16. “Survivor China”: “Survivor China” is a season that keeps going up every time I do these rankings. I appreciate the season a lot more on rewatch than I did the first time, seeing all the little jokes and side moments I missed. The location is good and distinctive as well, with a solid theme, though I will say the challenges took a massive dip in quality post-merge, which is a slight mark against it. There’s also a lot of dramatic moments, from Jamie playing a fake idol to James getting voted out with two idols, to Todd’s fantastic Final Tribal Council performance. Many would say this deserves to be in the “Great” category, and I did debate putting this and the next season in that category. So what keeps it out? Again, this season has two flaws that for me hold it back. My main objection is Todd. He’s a great winner, with again one of if not the best Final Tribal Council performance ever, but he was really broadcast as the winner from the get-go. Even as someone relatively new to “Survivor” at the time, I could tell Todd was being set up to win, and wasn’t surprised when he did. This lack of mystery makes the later episodes in particular hard to get through at times. My second objection is, I’ll admit, subjective, but I REALLY don’t care for Courtney. I know a lot of people find her funny, but she really doesn’t do it for me. I think my thing is that insult comedy is fine, but you have to insult yourself as much, if not more so, than other people. Apart from maybe one or two cracks about her weight, Courtney just seems to go after the flaws of others, which does not win me over. What, you think you don’t stink sometimes? I did actually debate putting this season in the “Ugly” category, since even if I don’t like Courtney, she did not deserve the treatment she got from Jean-Robert, but given that it was limited to nighttime cuddling, I think it’s borderline enough to stay our of that category, but only just.

15. “Survivor Kaoh Rong”: Yes, even the season that gave us my all-time favorite player can’t break into the “Great” category. Even so, there’s a lot to love about this season. A lot of big characters, a good guy/bad guy dynamic that keeps people invested, and one of the most even Final Threes, in my opinion, we’ve ever had in terms of how they played the game. While I don’t care for them reusing a season theme, this one at least made sense, and wasn’t as forced as others. This season works particularly well in light of the trends of modern “Survivor”. Apart from being one of the lasts seasons to not be overloaded with twists, the big moment of this season, Aubry convincing Tai not to save Scot, comes from pure social manipulation, which is both fascinating and refreshing to see in this day and age. From Debbie to Aubry to Tai, there’s a lot to love about this season. Some might say it’s low for all the medevacs, and that’s a mark against it, but that’s not the main thing keeping it out of the “Great” category. No, this season could very easily have been one of the greats, but the editors screwed the pooch on this one. Based on the season we saw, Aubry should have won over Michele. Now, before you go on with your angry comments, I am NOT saying Michele didn’t deserve her win. Michele played a fantastic game, and certainly the one the jury needed to see. She earned her win, plain and simple, and I say that as an Aubry fan over here. The problem is that the show never justified WHY Michele deserved to win above Aubry. Post game interviews tell us that Aubry made social gaffes, and Michele was tight with everyone, but the show didn’t highlight that. It instead highlighted Aubry’s triumphs, and minimized her few mistakes that she did make. I get that Michele’s game may not have been exciting enough to show on its own, but show us Aubry’s spots. Show us her flaws in greater detail. Leave out the “There’s as much brawn in her as there is in me.” type confessionals, and put in ones where people talk about how they don’t like Aubry. The jury made the right decision for them, and to the internet community, I point out that it is possible for BOTH Aubry and Michele to have played good game, and saying one played well does not mean the other played poorly. But the editors didn’t let us see that, and so the season, while still good overall, has an unsatisfying end.

THE GREAT

14. “Survivor Gabon”: If it weren’t for the new category, and “Survivor All-Stars” needing to go in it, this season would probably have fallen the furthest in my season rankings since the start. While I have a soft spot for this season, I can see the flaws on rewatch. This season is an INCREDIBLY slow start, with people making stupid decisions and not much going on. Most of the big characters are kept around for the merge, though, and it’s around that time that things start to pick up. Really, I’d say the double-Tribal Council is where things get good. Ace made a decent early villain, but he wasn’t everyone’s cup of tea. His elimination, however, gave rise to one of my favorite storylines in the show’s history: The Rise and Fall of Ken Hoang. True, “Survivor Gabon” may not have had the greatest strategy in the history of forever, but I hate it when people say the show had no strategy whatsoever this season. Look at Ken. Look at his manipulations. He went from a position of no power to RUNNING the game, and even managed to be likable on a season where no one liked anyone else. Yes, he got cocky and did himself in, which made the finale as a whole lackluster, but he admits this flaw and has learned from it. I still say it’s a crime he’s never been brought back. I can see people being turned off by how hateful the season can seem, but personally, I saw the arguments as more coming from people who were misanthropic rather than hateful, which makes a big difference to me. Add into that a distinctive location, and you’ve got a season that needs more love. Don’t get me wrong, the front half is a slog, but that back half is well worth it.

13. “Survivor Philippines”: This and next season fall into a small subcategory I call “Technical Perfection”, wherein a season has no flaws, it just doesn’t excite me. “Survivor Philippines” does nothing wrong. Abi-Maria sticks around a bit longer than I’d like, but it crosses the line into funny at some point. Penner isn’t as funny as his previous appearances, but also plays probably his best strategic game. Russell Swan and the Matsing tribe have a great early story-arc, though this means the season kind of peaks too early. On the whole, I really have nothing bad to say about the season, and it does nothing wrong, but it doesn’t stick in my mind. Like “Survivor Blood vs. Water”, it just kind of blends together for me. Technical perfection means I have to put it in this category, but lack of memorability means I put it no higher than this.

12. “Survivor David vs. Goliath”: I get why people generally like this one better than I do. It was going to be a good season based on cast alone, with a lot of memorable new characters that were fun to watch as well as decent strategy, but when it’s sandwiched between “Survivor Ghost Island” and “Survivor Edge of Extinction” two seasons that have been generally poorly received, makes it look even better. Perhaps because I liked “Survivor Ghost Island” more than others, I’ve never been as bullish on this season, though the positives are still quite positive. People like Gabby, Christian, and Lyrsa are some all-time great characters I look forward to seeing back, and even some of the quieter players like Carl have their good moments. Similar to “Survivor Philippines”, though, a lot of the season and its boot order blend together for me. Plus, I just don’t like the theme. It feels forced, and gives an edge to the “Davids” in the end, since they become the underdogs. Still, apart from a forced theme this season does what it needs to do, and does it well. While I say it all blends together, there are one or two stand out moments, such as the idol nullifier play, that spring to mind when I think of this season, so I put it higher than “Survivor Philippines”, but that’s the only reason.

11. “Survivor Palau”: “Survivor Palau” is an oddity on this list, in that I put it high up despite rewatch value being very low. Seeing Ulong get decimated the first time is fun, but seeing it afterward is not. It just becomes a slog, and then seeing Tom dominate is a similar deal. Once again, though, theme saves it. Such dominance feels appropriate for a season themed around WWII, and this season goes all-out in the aesthetic. The challenges are fantastic, some of the choices made (particularly in the first immunity challenge) fascinating, and this season has a lot of oddball moments that stand out. Those are probably this season’s two greatest strengths: It’s fun to watch, and it stands out. That alone earns it a spot in this category.

10. “Survivor Borneo”: Ranking this season is always tough. It stands out and is memorable and enjoyable, but for very different reasons than most other seasons. Only Richard Hatch was really playing what we’d call a recognizable game today, and it can get old, particularly in the pre-merge, with how naive these people seem compared to the game we know today. It shows how we got here, but doesn’t do as much on its own to recommend it. That said, the impactful moments of the season, like Jenna not getting a video from home, and especially Gretchen’s boot, still have a major impact even in this jaded day and age. I have no nostalgia blinders for this season, having gotten into the show later, so I’m not as high on this season as some, but as a microcosm of early “Survivor”, as well as a fascinating case study, this season definitely deserves a spot amongst the greats.

9. “Survivor The Amazon”: This was another season that nearly ended up in the “Ugly” category. Man, those sexual politics have not aged well. Nothing close to a sex-crime or anything, but the men do not come off looking good here, and really, the season only avoids my wrath for this because the women get the better of the men in the end. Leaving that aside, “Survivor The Amazon” is a fun season, plain and simple. Rob Cesternino is, of course, our main source of comedy, and his “Casey Kasem” voting confessional is matched in humor only by Wendell’s anti-Chris Noble rant on “Survivor Ghost Island”. That said, most others on this season are no slouch either, providing some good moments of levity that help to make this season both fun and distinct. There’s even some good character arcs, with Matthew’s evolution in particular being a fun watch for me. There’s a lot of good strategists here as well, and I’m still amazed that Deena in particular has never come back. With all that said, this season does land this low because a lot of the gender humor is uncomfortable in this day and age, and the guys really do look like jackasses, but if you can look past that, this season is one of the funniest the show has ever had, and all the funnier for it.

8. “Survivor Tocantins”: This season brings us another fun underdog story, and one of the most lopsided victories ever. Seeing the Jalapao three work the cracks in the old Timbira was just a joy to go through, and seeing just how dominant J.T. would be, to the point of people STILL IN THE GAME saying they would rather he win than themselves, was a fascinating journey. Even J.T.’s subsequent abysmal performances can’t diminish his accomplishments here. Many people point to the humor of this season, but it doesn’t do it for me. Coach I found more annoying than funny, and similar to Courtney, Tyson just doesn’t do it for me, though in this case it’s more the over-reliance on sex humor than an unwillingness to make fun of himself that I dislike about Tyson. That said, a distinct location and a fun and engaging story help elevate this season, and with no controversial elements, it’s fair for the season to land this high.

7. “Survivor Vanuatu”: This season was unappreciated in its time, and I can definitely understand why. While there were subtle hints as to where it was going, it was tough to follow on first watch, and didn’t stand out as much as previous seasons. Opposite to “Survivor Palau”, however, this season THRIVES on being rewatched. Seeing all the little moments that led to Chris’ surprise victory over the women’s alliance makes this season a fascinating detective story, and the sheer ludicrousness of the guy who lost the first challenge winning the game is the stuff of legends. We also got some great new female characters and strategists, with Ami in particular a standout. Maybe the location was a bit generic, but the volcanos were a nice touch, and they added a few elements you wouldn’t find on other seasons. Between the spiritual stone and the pig they got at tree mail, they did their level best to make this not just another island season. With probably the best detective story the show’s ever had, this season deserves a rewatch, if you haven’t in a while.

6. “Survivor Africa”: If you’re looking for a distinctive season, this one is for you. You see even one screenshot, you know this is “Survivor Africa”. I hear a lot of people say this wasn’t as good as the first two seasons before it, but I wholeheartedly disagree. It kept the heart of the early seasons, with people moralizing a bit more, while still having some good strategic shakeups. We had our first thrown challenge (in with some of the best challenges the show has ever seen), our first tribe swap, and our first winner we could like. Seriously, if you’re not at least a casual fan of Ethan, you have no soul. Lex’s paranoia and gut make for a fun storyline, and getting to see the countryside on rewards like the goat reward or the AIDS supplies reward make this a season unlike any other. Good combats evil, good triumphs. What don’t people like about this season again.

5. “Survivor Guatemala”: I’ll admit, this is the season where my nostalgia blinders come on. This is the season that got me into “Survivor”, and I think it still holds up. Great location, great underdog story with Danni (so glad to see her back on the upcoming season), memorable characters in the likes of Judd, Gary, and Rafe, and even a fun bit of lore with the “car curse” getting acknowledged by the show in-universe. Yes, it’s not my number one season, since we do lose a lot of good people in the pre-merge, but what we’ve got is still solid throughout. People say this season ruined Stephenie, but I think it was more “Survivor Palau” that gave us an unrealistically heroic depiction of her. Yes, she was the hero that survived all of Ulong, but it’s not as though she didn’t TRY and be devious with her tribe. They were just so incompetent that she couldn’t be. For instance, when it was down to her, Bobby Jon, and Ibrehim, when Bobby Jon waffled on whether he would keep her or not, she tried to blindside him with Ibrehim. The only reason we have the Stephenie/Bobby Jon pairing people love so much these days is because Ibrehim was non-committal as well. Stephenie has always been somewhat villainous, she just didn’t get a chance to show it. Disappointing perhaps for the people who put her up on a pedestal, but in my opinion, a good story for a good season. It needs more love.

4. “Survivor Cagayan”: When watching a season of “Survivor”, you generally want the show to have both good characters and good strategists. This season brought both, often in the same people, and that’s what makes it so great. For good or for ill, everyone came to play, and whether they played well or not, they played hard. This made for an impactful week-to-week story, and with players being willing to shake things up, not the most predictable one either. Most people sing the praises of this season, so there’s little need for me to do so as well. Only the presence of the super idol, and Tony’s game getting more credit than it deserves (I’m not convinced there was a method to his madness; I think his strategy was more “throw it at the wall and see what sticks”, which just happened to work this time) keep it from being higher, but it remains a top-tier season nonetheless.

3. “Survivor Pearl Islands”: Another classic. If you want a season with a memorable theme, look no further than this. “Survivor Pearl Islands” kept up the aesthetic with the set dressings and challenges, but actually incorporated the theme into the game as well. There was a treasure hunt, the looting of a town, and the robbing of another tribe’s camp. Mind you, there was also the Outcast twist. I don’t mind it as much as some, as it was an obvious idea that had to be tried, but it does bring down the season slightly. But that cast! With the possible exceptions of “Survivor Borneo” and “Survivor The Australian Outback”, this may be the most iconic cast we’ve ever had. Sandra. Jonny Fairplay. Savage. Freaking RUPERT! All from here, and all bring big personality to make for both a fun and memorable season.

2. “Survivor Cambodia”: For a season this late in the timeline to make it nearly to the number one spot, it has to be good. In a smart move by producers, we effectively picked the cast this season, meaning we had a buy-in that other returnee seasons may not have had. But that wouldn’t have been enough if the cast gave us nothing, but they did. The name of the game here is strategy. I’ll admit, it’s not as character-driven as other seasons, but it makes up for that by giving us some of the most in-depth strategy talk the show ever had. While “voting blocks” could get old for how much they used the term, the fact remains that alliances shifted week to week helped keep the show exciting and engaging through to the end. Throw in great returning challenges and a more distinctive new location than before, and you’ve got the makings of a legendary season. So, why not number one? Well, good as the season is, I would say the pre-merge stories are more engaging than the post-merge stories, largely due to the pre-merge having smaller tribes, making things easier to follow. The post-merge is still good, but it’s an overall downward trajectory, as opposed to our number one season, which had an upward trajectory.

1. “Survivor Micronesia”: What can I say, this season is legendary? People like to mock how lopsided the show was in favor of the returnees, but I’d say a big strength of this season was how good the fans could be. True, there were some idiots, but a lot of the fans actually went toe-to-toe with the favorites, and could have won if not for luck. Amanda doesn’t find the idol at Final 5, and Natalie or Alexis probably wins the season. But, of course, the big draw of this season is the shocking moments. I’m not going to say the Black Widow Brigade was the best alliance ever, but damn if they didn’t pull off some improbable moves. Erik giving up immunity alone probably lands it a spot on this list, but 16 seasons on a show that formerly had 16 castaways, with a trivia competition based on the show near the end, with returning players, some of the most iconic of the past 9 seasons? This is the stuff of legend, culminating in the first ever unisex final episode. Every rewatch just gets better and better, and that, to me, makes it a season deserving of a number one spot.

Well, there you have it. As I say, this is a subjective list, so feel free to let me know your thoughts in the comments below! Otherwise, I’ll see you next month for “Survivor Winners at War”!

-Matt

Title Credit to Jean Storrs.

Idol Speculation: “Survivor Island of the Idols” Finale: In a Mirror, Darkly

Longtime readers of mine will know that one of my favorite things to do with a finale blog is to point out how the finale weirdly parallels the season as a whole. It’s frankly strange how often this one (admittedly extra-long) episode is a microcosm for the season as a whole. This season, however, I can’t do that. Indeed, with rare exception, this episode has exactly the opposite of the strengths and weaknesses of the season as a whole.

Case in point, despite not emphasizing the season-naming twist too much, we start off with Rob and Sandra looking into the sun, discussing their history with the game. Not that this scene isn’t nice, but again, this is the finale of a journey we’ve spent 13 episodes (14 if you count double-length episodes as two episodes, which I don’t) on, getting to know the NEW people along the way. This finale should be all about them. Putting the emphasis on Rob and Sandra is, in my book, a poor move.

I shouldn’t give the show too much hate for this, though, since this is about the most we’ll see of the pair this entire time. What I WILL complain about is the lack of a recap. True, that’s been the case pretty much the entire season, and while I think it was a step in the wrong direction particularly in some episodes, I’ve been overall fine with it. The finale is the exception to this. Even in this day and age, the finale is usually the most-watched episode of any season. In addition to the loyal fans who follow the season religiously, you also get in some casuals who get curious about how this thing will end. I’m all for putting the fans first (especially since they’re what’s allowed the show to go on so long), but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t cater to casual viewers at all.

In any case, the Lumuwaku tribe gets a note for everyone to pack their things and get on a boat. Have the producers thrown up their hands after Dan’s behavior, and just decided to scrap the whole thing? No, of course not! Everyone just goes to Island of the Idols where they’ll live in Rob’s super-shelter for the remainder of the game. Goodie. Because why emphasize the society that our new players have built, when you could emphasize the society Rob and Sandra have built? We also find out here that the whole “Lying about Island of the Idols” thing was dropped at some point as Tommy, the only player left who hadn’t been, expressed no surprise at what he saw. He did insist on the first hug, which was fair. Our players get new “special edition” buffs for the occasion, which appear to be black, because why have different and interesting tribe colors when all merge buffs could just be black? Rob and Sandra have some nice words of parting, and mercifully leave so that the focus can be on what we’ve all been watching this season for…

IDOL HUNTING! What, you thought this game was about the players? No, you fool, it’s all about idols and advantages! After Noura has a fun scene where she gushes about how nice the shelter is, Tommy points out that this is all too easy, and there must be some twist to this new camp. He correctly zeroes in on the new buffs they were given, and sure enough notes that one of the idols on the logo has been replaced with a machete. It’s subtle, but it’s there, so Tommy goes around examining the machetes. He eventually finds one embedded in a random coconut, which has been painted red on the inside. The only problem with this is that Tommy is colorblind, and has trouble telling what “red” is, thus not doing much to limit his search. What he does to combat this problem I’m sure a lot of people give him flak for, but honestly, I can understand Tommy’s logic here. Needing help, he goes to Dean, who’s really the only logical choice. Tommy’s made it clear that despite alliances with Janet and Lauren, he really doesn’t want to go to the end with them, so they’re out. Noura? Do you really think Noura would be a good idol-hunting partner? No, Dean is more reliable, and has helped out Tommy in the past, making him the best option for Tommy at this point.

Unfortunately, Dean has other ideas. He wants the idol for himself, and so makes no pretense about looking. Tommy notices, and so doggedly keeps searching on his own. Eventually he finds the correct clue: A red board along a path. Color-blindness be damned. Tommy peels it up to reveal, not an idol, but another clue. In this case, a letter “H” carved into some bamboo. Still befuddled, Tommy calls in Dean for help, and while Dean still doesn’t look like he’s helping, he actually is looking, just for himself. While Tommy is looking for a path intersection or a set of sticks laid out the same way, Dean thinks it looks like the rope swing that was set up, and so goes for a swing. He oddly does not look under the swing, which was the first place I’d look if I suspected the swing was hiding something, but Dean turns out to be right in this case. He notices a similar “H” carved into one of the shelter supports, and after waiting for everyone to be off somewhere else, pulls out an idol, and a nice note from Rob and Sandra. I’m of two minds about this. On the one hand, as a Tommy supporter, I’m sad that he didn’t get the advantage. However, one of the things I love about Tommy is that he’s done so well without the need for an idol or advantage. It’s a nice thumbing of the nose at a season that so seems to emphasize idols and advantages, and also speaks well to Tommy’s skill in the game. In that sense, I’m glad that his record of good gameplay wouldn’t be sullied with such a crutch. Dean, for his part, is happy at his find, but a little too optimistic about how much power this gives him. He notes his legacy advantage (fake), his idol nullifier (won in a lame coin flip), and his hidden immunity idol (actually an accomplishment). Of these, one just makes him look bad, and two need to be played correctly to be of use. Dean thinks this makes him a major threat in the game, and I’m not saying he’s completely out of the running, but the dude overemphasizes how important these things are. I think it’s his talk throughout the episode of how “historic” this is, and how a real fan of the show appreciates what Dean’s doing that gets to me. It’s ok to like these things, but for me, they’re not what the show is or should be about, and I don’t like that Dean is perpetrating the stereotype that they’re all this show focusses on these days.

Our immunity challenge for the day is another obstacle course, though with a lot of emphasis on ladders this time. Tribe members use sticks to get down rope ladder rungs to build, well, a ladder, and then have to maneuver a bag of balls up another ladder by moving its rungs. This all ends in a table maze, which is probably the weakest element of the challenge, but it’s otherwise ok. Obstacle courses are just so commonplace at this point in the game that they just all blend together anyway. Dean ends up winning, but since he wasn’t really a target at this point, it doesn’t really matter. Dean also gets to take someone to steak dinner, and so takes Noura. Not sure what it is about Noura this episode, but she REALLY leans into the whole “dating” thing, comparing Dean to a sleazy ex-boyfriend while also admiring him in confessionals. The pair make a pat agreement to take each other to the end that neither of them really believes, so the scene is more comedy than anything. Never change, Noura.

Dean does, however, plan to use his idol nullifier tonight, since Janet needs to play her idol that night anyway, and Dean and Tommy both want her gone. Surprisingly, Janet is on board with this plan. Not so much the “idol nullifier” part, but she is suggesting the votes be piled on her so she can idol out Lauren. Not a bad plan, but definitely risky, as we see in a minute. Of course, we need misdirection, and so Dean talks about potentially wanting Lauren out instead, since she’s a bigger social threat. Tommy, however, emphasizes the threat that Janet poses as well, particularly as she’s good at fire-making, as we saw at the beginning of the season. Weirdly, they’re both right. Dean is right when he says that Lauren is more of a social threat than anyone left, and Tommy is right when he says that Janet will beat anyone in fire making. Hence, why Janet needs to go. I’m normally all for voting out the biggest threat, but due to fire making, this is the last time you can realistically get Janet out, whereas Lauren can go pretty much at any time.

The show does its level best to convince us that there’s a chance that Dean will let Lauren be voted out, but I’m personally not buying it. The misdirection this season has been pretty good overall, but after 13 episodes, we’ve learned its tricks. We know that even if it looks like people are going to make the dumb decision, they continue to do the smart thing. Hence, Janet will go home via idol nullifier, exactly as everyone predicted. After a pretty tame Tribal Council (though mercifully without the commentary of Rob and Sandra), we get just that. Even if predictable, though, we do get the impact of the idol nullifier being played. Sure, we know it’s coming, but the impact on the players, Janet in particular, still makes for an effective moment. Janet goes home and I, like the rest of the fanbase, am heartbroken. Janet was a decent player in the game, but more than that, and excellent human being. Even if she was the smart choice to vote out at this juncture, she was a bright spot in an otherwise bleak season, and a different character type that we usually see make it this late in the show. I look forward to her return, and think her interview at commercial was completely justified. Glad to hear she’s inspiring others.

That said, we the audience are not the only ones to react to that idol nullifier. The jury is quite vocal about it as well, with Missy in particular giving a good “shocked” expression at the whole thing. Here’s where my heart starts to sink, as it looks like Dean may have a point. True, he’s been playing well for the last couple of episodes, and that’s not nothing, but is a lackluster first 3/4ths of a game no longer relevant? Is a flashy end really all that’s needed at this point? Are idols and advantages really the things we want in our winner exclusively? It’s a depressing thought, if true.

On our next day, Tommy continues his social game, by spinning complete BS to Noura. He has correctly realized that, while fire-making can be a way to win jury points, it’s also a huge risk. Tommy, being risk-averse, has made sure no one has ever seen him make fire, and so sells Noura on the idea that he’s never made fire before, and isn’t good at it, the idea being that this way Noura won’t want to put him in in the hopes of beating someone else. Noura admits that he’s playing her, but also says she likes the attention. I’ll also give Tommy credit not only for hiding his skills, but also for having the smarts to do his schmoozing BEFORE the challenge, thus making the lie less transparent. It does make the winner of our challenge more transparent, though. Since both Tommy and Dean have made deals to the end with Noura, Noura is going to win the challenge, a fact emphasized when we see that it’s a repeat of the challenge from “Survivor Heroes vs. Healers vs. Hustlers”, where tribe members balance blocks that spell a phrase (in this case, “Island of the Idols”) on a wobbly pole. Not the worst challenge, but it doesn’t have the epic feel a final challenge should. It also favors women, who tend to have better balance, and so Noura ends up the winner. Good for her, but a predictable outcome nonetheless.

Much as Noura can be fun, here she’s a bit much for everyone. It’s an accepted phenomenon that when you win immunity, you’re a bit happier than the rest of your tribe. In this case, however, the rest of the tribe REALLY wants to know what Noura’s planning, since it kind of affects them. Instead, Noura cheerfully says she’s going for a swim and suggests they share a pineapple afterward. They do not take this well, especially since when Noura DOES come and tell them her plan, she does it in her roundabout way that makes her a fun character, but hard to live with. She eventually informs Lauren that she’ll be going to fire-making due to being a threat, which Lauren does not take well, mostly because Noura still insists on describing her as her “number one”, which she objectively is not at this point. Lauren keeps asking who she’ll go against, while Noura keeps insisting on explaining her logic. She eventually reveals that, wanting Lauren beaten, she’s sending Dean to fire, evidently having bought Tommy’s lie about being bad at fire. Naturally, Tommy and Dean are both happy about this. Lauren goes off to cry for a minute, though she quickly sets to making fire. She and Dean both have some trouble, though Tommy offers both advice, so that whoever loses will still be happy he helped. How he’s never called on this, I can’t say. About the only disadvantage is that Noura comes over to try and make peace with Lauren, but as it’s Noura, she doesn’t do a very good job of it. She keeps insisting on that “number one” thing, which really pisses Lauren off. Noura also doesn’t take the hint that Lauren wants to be left alone right now. I know this show thrives on conflict, but this really just felt uncomfortable. Too personal and too pointless at this juncture to be worth showing. As to whether this was a good idea for Noura, I personally would have kept Dean around for the end, and let Tommy and Lauren go to fire. You can’t trust anything anyone says, especially relating to fire-making, and if your problem with Dean is that he’s rallying at the end, putting him in a position to win fire-making only helps that. Take that away, and you undercut his argument, and let the two big social threats duke it out.

Contrary to how Noura is, Tribal Council is short and sweet. Since Noura already knows who she’s taking, we guarantee that Tommy is safe, and Lauren and Dean go to fire-making. It’s a decently close match between them, but Dean’s extra practice and not being annoyed by Noura pays off, as he wins, thus making his case better for the end. As one might expect, I am sorry to see Lauren go home. Her game was underemphasized, especially early on, but the woman had a lot of good plays, and can be proud of herself. She played well, and it would have been interesting to see how she would have done against the jury. She definitely deserves the Probst interview she got after her exit. I also look forward to her inevitable return.

After ending the fire making challenge, Dean, in an attempt to look better, points out that he’d only made fire that day. Not bad, but he says too much. He goes on to say “Tommy played you.” This makes him look weak socially compared to Tommy. As Jack puts it: “Tommy played YOU”. Fun fact: This is the first time all season that the number of men left is greater than the number of women. No small feat.

Since we’re now at Day 39, this of course means that we get everyone’s arguments for why they should win, before we head off to Tribal Council. Surprisingly, everyone’s got at least a decent argument. Tommy of course has his social game, and Dean has his “fourth-quarter rally” as he calls it. But Noura even brings up a good point: she could easily have been the first one out, yet rallied to become a major player in the game. True, Noura’s personality and long-windedness tend to counteract any chance she has with the jury, but on its own, the argument’s not half-bad.

Not content to just let things sit, Tommy and Noura discuss their opening statements. Tommy suggests that they need to go after Dean, emphasizing how he was pulled along as a goat the entire way, and never in power. He suggests Noura talk about this in her opening statement. Translation: “Noura, make my biggest target look like an ass for me so he’s easier to beat, while keeping my hands clean of any mudslinging.” Noura seems drawn in by it, even if she realizes what Tommy’s doing, and I’m happy because it reminds me of Chris Daugherty (“Survivor Vanuatu”) convincing Twila to not hold back in their Final Tribal Council. It’s actually a brilliant move that I can’t wait to see play out.

What’s that? We’re not getting opening statements this time. Yay. Guess that made that completely pointless.

Say what you will about this season, but if nothing else, the jury has managed to do something not seen since the switch to the new Final Tribal Council Format: BE INTERESTING! Seriously, apart from Wardog’s “The theme is not on trial here; you are.” comment on “Survivor Edge of Extinction” there hasn’t been one standout moment since we moved away from questions. This jury, however, delivers. Oh, it’s not always coherent what they deliver. Indeed, a lot of their debates over social game versus idol game become a jumbled mess, but at least there’s actual DEBATE and EMOTION going into it. Things never go out of control, thanks in large part to moderator Jamal, but they do get fun. Elaine calling out Noura for giving non-answers. Aaron calling out Tommy for dismissing the idol hunting part of the game. Karishma calling out Dean for not forming the needed relationships. And of course, Kellee calling out everybody. The lack of question-and-answer makes a blow by blow impracticable, but Noura gets dismissed early on due to using yet another “dating” metaphor. Thus, it comes down to Tommy, the social player, versus Dean, the advantage player. For once, there’s no obvious winner based on arguments. Tommy wins in the early portion, since it’s most about social game, and Dean admits that he didn’t make those bonds. Dean tries to spin it as a positive, saying that he didn’t break any bonds as a result, but with how many admit that Tommy was up in their alliance, coupled with Tommy doing a good job articulating his strategy, and owning up to his playing of Noura to guarantee himself safety. The second portion focusses on idols, advantages, and immunity wins, an area where Tommy is pretty much completely lacking. Tommy takes the appropriate tactic of downplaying the importance of these things, though this does incite debate amongst the jury whether that’s true (Aaron and Missy seem to feel it is, others not so much). None of this is helped by Dean’s revelation that he found the idol under Tommy’s proverbial nose. Even the revelation of the fake legacy advantage doesn’t hurt, as Jamal points out he was able to use it as a threat in spite of being a fake. Tommy doesn’t come out looking too good, but Dean also shoots himself in the foot. Having initially said he made no deals he couldn’t keep, he mentions having made final two deals with people sitting on the jury, and is rightly called out for it. There’s closing statements, but that’s basically the note we go out on.

So, it’s social game versus flashy game. As always, and as it should, social game wins out. Tommy wins, the first person to do so without an idol or advantage since Denise Stapely on “Survivor Philippines” (if you count winning immunity as well, the last person to match Tommy was Natalie White on “Survivor Samoa”). That is a good note for the season. One thing this episode did that the season as a whole avoided was to REALLY emphasize the importance of idols and advantages in the game. They were talked about, sure, but never really seen as a “necessity” before that episode. Unlike the rest of the season, the twist of the season overall was emphasized as the main focus of the season in this episode. That’s why someone like Dean, who only really started doing anything worthy of a vote last episode, is still talked about as a contender. So, for all that emphasis, it is satisfying to see the one guy who had NONE of that, and just played his social game, give a figurative thumbed nose to production. Tommy may not be the most interesting winner, but he did play an excellent game worthy of his victory. And I’m not just saying that because he was my personal favorite.

And so we come to our “live” reunion show. As has been highly publicized by now, it was pre-recorded, and we the viewers got an edited version. I’m of two minds about this. On the one hand, unlike an edited tv show, a truly live reunion can’t be edited super fast, and there are kids who watch “Survivor”. Wouldn’t want them picking up anything negative like that. Plus, with lawsuits doubtless pending, you want to make sure you don’t say anything that can be used against you. And, above all, this can hopefully avoid a “Jerri Manthey” incident like we had on “Survivor All-Stars”. That said, it’s not down to the show to police what they show, but down to families, and editing the reunion also gives the show control of the narrative, which they could do who knows what with. All that is suspicious, and on the whole, I think they should have kept it live, though I can understand why they did it the way they did, and won’t vilify them for it.

As to the show itself, it’s ok. Not great. We hear at least a bit from most people on the jury and up, but almost nothing from the pre-mergers, including our first Canadian! Also, why wasn’t Jack able to come? Dan I get, but why not Jack? Still, the big story is the Probst/Kellee conversation, and in one final twist on how the show has been, they handle it WAY better than they have so far. They admit fault. They explain that they’re going to do better. But most important, they give Kellee a platform to speak on her experience, and largely let her do it. Probst interrupts a little bit at one point, but for the most part, they handle things well here. It gives me hope for the future, and Kellee says she hopes that the incident won’t color the overall perception of the season.

I feel for Kellee, but unfortunately I think the damage was done. Even this overall lackluster, predictable finale, despite a nice outcome, doesn’t change anything. For good or for ill, despite everything good about this season, including a great and overall likable cast (again, Dan notwithstanding) with a good reaffirmation of the importance of the social game, when we look back on the season, what we’ll think of is the controversy, and it just drags the season down too much. I hope most of the cast gets a second chance, because they deserve a season unmarred by this controversy.

But that’s not what you want to hear about. You want me to talk about the reveal for next season. And I’m sorry, but I have to complain. Don’t get me wrong, I WANT to like this season. I WANT to be excited about this season. I mean, all-winners is an idea that ANY true fan has at least thought about. Come on, look at some of the people we’re finally getting to see again. “Survivor Guatemala” finally gets the representation it so richly deserves with the return of Danni. Yul comes back to finally prove he can play well without an original-rules idol. ETHAN FREAKING ZOHN will grace our tv screens again after 16 years of absence! So yeah, I want to be excited, but I can’t. That’s because, in that preview, they also mentioned something awful. Something dreadful. Something so horrendous, it may ruin the season before it even starts…

“Winners at War”? Really? THAT’S the best title you could come up with? Look, I know “Survivor Legends” is a bit generic, but it at least has more gravitas than this. And if you did need the alliteration, you could have kept it! Drop the “At”, call it “Winners War”. That sounds cool. “Winners at War” sounds like the news tagline for a minor feud between a couple that won the lottery. Everything about this season should be big and epic. That name is not.

Oh, and I suppose they also mentioned that “Edge of Extinction” is coming back. That’s also a big mark against the season, though my hope is that, like Redemption Island being on “Survivor Blood vs. Water” it’ll be merely pointless rather than actively awful.

Well, that was a lot. Only thing left to do is go through the cast, and note how wrong I was during my cast assessment.

KELLEE-The “Wentworth Loophole” continues. Kellee was certainly memorable. Didn’t make it quite as far as I’d thought, but she still did well.

RONNIE-Again, I wasn’t super far off, but I underestimated how annoying he would be, and as a consequence overestimated his time in the game.

CHELSEA-Wrong. Much more interesting, but much shorter-lived than I predicted.

DEAN-Dean is a weird one. I’d definitely say I was right in that he never really connected with the other members of the cast, but not quite for the reasons I thought. It also never really mattered to his time in the game. On the whole, wrong.

NOURA-She was definitely as out there as I thought, and I was initially right that she would rub people the wrong way. Yet, she lasted longer than I thought. Good for her.

VINCE-Had he actually kept his head down, he might have exactly matched my predictions. As it stands, I was wrong. He was much shorter-lived than I thought.

LAUREN-Wrong, flat out. Maybe her charm just didn’t come across to me, maybe she’s just not my cup of tea, but she was WAY better than I thought at the game.

TOMMY-CALLED IT! CALLED IT! NEENER, NEENER, NEENER!

KARISHMA-Kind of right, kind of wrong. She definitely struggled out there, but then the women’s alliance kept her alive. Ended up being wrong as a result.

AARON-For once this blog, pretty much straight-up right. Muscle kept around until the merge, but not much past that.

MOLLY-Right on time in the game, wrong on personality. She was not as big a character as I thought. Probably the forgotten member of the season, if I’m being honest.

TOM-Not as big a liability as I predicted, but still wrong overall. He lasted about as long as I predicted, though.

MISSY-I may have undersold her game skills a bit, but she lasted about as long as I thought, and left for being a threat, so I was pretty much right.

JACK-He had a bit more game than I gave him credit for, but I was otherwise right. Out after the swap.

ELAINE-For once, one of the biggest characters I predicted pulled through! Elaine did end up a better Lauren Rimmer (“Survivor Heroes vs Healers vs Hustlers”), and I am thrilled to be right about her!

JASON-Wrong. Overestimated his smarts and his time in the game.

ELIZABETH-Wrong. I overestimated her game savvy, and as a result, she didn’t match my expectations. She came decently close, though.

JAMAL-Pretty charming, and out at the early merge. Another “win” for me.

JANET-Wrong, and happy to be so. She was much better at the game than I gave her credit for, and I’m happy she made it deep.

DAN-Wrong, though who could have predicted that whole debacle.

Well, that about wraps up this season. Thanks for being patient for this to come out. Now, you’d expect to see my cast assessment for “Survivor Winners at War” up soon, since the cast is revealed, but I’m waiting for confirmation that name color is indicative of tribe, due to so many previous relationships staying together. With 2/5 of the “Villains” tribe on this season, some overlap was inevitable, but some of this just seems nuts. Really? You put Jeremy and Natalie on the same tribe? What on earth made you think that was a good idea? But there’s another reason for the delay. Lame name aside, this is the 20th anniversary of “Survivor”, and that deserves celebration. I think it’s time we go back and look at those season rankings…

-Matt

Title Credit to Jean Storrs.

Idol Speculation: “Survivor Island of the Idols” Episode 12: Mirror Universe

With the nation of Fiji subsidizing half the show, and it being relatively easy to film there, it has seemed like “Survivor” would never leave again. Yet, this episode provides us with an alternative, one that keeps the ease that the show currently has in filming, and have no extra cost. Ladies and Gentlemen, I propose to you Season 41: “Survivor Mirror Universe”.

What’s that? Getting to a metaphysical concept where alignments are switched is beyond the realm of mortal ken? Nonsense! The show’s clearly been there already! They brought back the version of Tommy that actually gets pissed at stuff, so they obviously are able to get there! Now all we need to do if film a season there, and we’re good to go. Before we can talk about my fee for this new idea, however, we have to talk about…

MATT’S MESS-UP!

Yep, can’t help but have a stumble in the antepenultimate blog, even if it is a small one. In all the excitement of the last 10 minutes of the previous episode, I forgot to mention that Elaine played her idol. Unnecessary in her case, since she wasn’t a target, but she had no way to guarantee that, and I can’t really fault her for being cautious. Now, on to the episode proper.

You would think, given that pretty much everyone was done with Karishma, that things would be fairly chill following the past Tribal Council. You forget, however, that Tommy has been replaced with an evil doppelgänger, who is none too pleased with only finding out about the votes coming his way at Tribal Council itself. Naturally, his anger is directed at Noura, since she seemed to be in on the plan. Even Tommy’s natural diplomacy can’t hide the rage in his voice. This, naturally, increases Noura’s rage, and she goes to take her revenge on Dean. She pulls from the Holly Hoffman (“Survivor Nicaragua”) school and goes for his shoes. She says she’s going to put them on the tribe sign, which I initially think is just a height thing, but then she mentions that this is where they always put an article of clothing from the people who’ve been voted out. I’d like to talk about the ominous yet subtle threat this poses to Dean, or Noura’s great “Soul/Sole” pun, but I can’t because I’m too busy being pissed that THIS IS THE FIRST TIME WE’RE HEARING ABOUT THIS TRADITION! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH THIS SHOW? Seriously, this is a great little slice of life that both humanizes and connects us with the cast, and is a unique feature we would get only on this season, yet we’re only just now hearing about it! Man, this show really has its priorities screwed up this season. And believe it or not, this is not the last time I’m going to say that about this episode.

Even if I had avoided the “Matt’s Mess-Up” section, Elaine would have made sure it was mentioned anyway, as she and Dean get up to go idol hunting. I’m all ready to blast this cast for sleeping in when there’s idols in them thar hills, but fortunately Janet is here to prove me wrong. She shakes Tommy awake, and the two pairs go idol hunting. Since Tommy or Janet finding the idol would be the outcome that removes the most tension from the moment, naturally Janet finds the idol and shows it to Tommy. Not that she gets away scot-free, though. Dean and Elaine note that Janet appears to be showing Tommy something, and Tommy is looking down, leading them to correctly conclude that Janet found the idol. I’d normally complain about Tommy and Janet not doing a 360 to check to see if they’re being watched, yet we’re clearly shown that Tommy did. Chalk one up to Dean and Elaine’s spying skills, I guess.

Coming back from commercial, we see that Elaine has now developed plan B to avoid going home, now that an idol seems out of the question. She goes back to the “women’s alliance” well by cozying up to Lauren, but surprisingly is the first person to actually try and convince Lauren to turn against Tommy. Not Missy’s plan of voting Tommy out independently, and then win Lauren’s loyalty, but to actually appeal to Lauren’s strategic nature. And Elaine actually has kind of a point, saying that nobody wants Lauren at the end, and that Dean will supplant her. It helps that Elaine doesn’t put the focus so much on getting out Tommy (a harder sell) as she does getting out Dean. Lauren discusses this with Tommy, who I have to say is kind of condescending here, comparing her to a jealous girlfriend. He can’t pretend that Dean hasn’t moved up, since he’s grateful to Dean, but spins a good lie that he’s replaced Janet, not her. Lauren seems to buy it, but we then see that this is another case of self-fulfilling prophecy. Just as talk of a women’s alliance can cause one to form where there was none before (see “Survivor Kaoh Rong”), so too can talk of a men’s alliance cause one to form. Tommy talks about how he, Dean, and Dan have a pact to the end, since Tommy can beat both of them, and how they need to get rid of Lauren. Funnily enough, while this is not the first alliance to be nothing but men, it IS the first one to be referred to as a “Men’s Alliance”.

Talking about how much Tommy likes Dean now can only lead up to something making Dean look terrible. Sure enough, a boat comes and informs the group that a random person needs to be sent to Island of the Idols. Guess who that random person is!

Fittingly for the last individual visit to Island of the Idols, Dean’s is a combination of both the humiliation type and the strategy type. We start off, fittingly for Dean, with the humiliation angle, as he talks about his “brilliant” move of playing the fake Legacy Advantage, instead of his REAL fake legacy advantage. This should be hilarious, but here’s where Rob and Sandra basically being producers hurts them. Look, Dean seems like a nice guy, but this is a dumb move on his part, and he should be HUMILIATED for it. Sandra should be talking about his “stupid ass”. Rob should be coming up with some crazy, working-class metaphor for what Dean’s trying to pull. But instead, they can’t give away that info, and just keep a straight face. Way to cut the teeth out of two of the best snarkers in the history of the game, show! Our lesson is much better, though with a caveat I’ll get to in a second. Rob and Sandra’s lesson is about jury management, something new, relevant to the game, and that Dean desperately needs. He’s been getting the goober edit for most of the season, and if that’s what we’re seeing, most likely that’s what the jury is seeing. But what they say about winning over the jury, I don’t get. They talk about the need to have victories in front of the jury, and about making a coherent narrative. A bit of an oversimplification, and leans in a bit too much into modern “Survivor” and its penchant for “BIG MOVEZ!”, but nothing too egregious. But it’s Sandra saying “The jury always wants to vote for the player who played the best.” that gets to me. Um, Sandra, more often than not it’s the jury voting for who they like the most, or at a minimum dislike the least, the leads to someone winning, game or no game. Rob I can understand having the philosophy of “the best player winning”, since that’s how he won “Survivor Redemption Island” but Sandra, BOTH OF YOUR WINS WERE DUE TO BEING AGAINST DISLIKED PLAYERS! DID YOU JUST FORGET THAT OR SOMETHING? Again, I think this is the producer hat coming on, but all this does is reaffirm that the pair are far more interesting as players than as producers.

In the vein of a move to impress the jury, Rob offers Dean the challenge of a “Coin Flip”. It’s about as much of a challenge as the “Pull rocks from a bag” family challenge on “Survivor Heroes vs. Healers vs. Hustlers”. He loses, he loses his vote. He wins, he gets his choice of an extra vote, an idol nullifier, or a hidden immunity idol good for one vote, and must be played on someone else. This is a toughie. On the one hand, if people are truthful, Dean really doesn’t have much to lose, even if he can’t vote. On the other, as he saw with Kellee, there’s no guarantee of loyalty after being saved, so perhaps better not to risk it with so few numbers, on something you have no control over. Plus, I don’t buy Rob’s comment that the jury will respect Dean risking everything in his game on a coin flip. Using an advantage correctly, I could get behind. But pulling that big a risk on something you have no control over? I wouldn’t respect that, and I don’t think the jury will either. It’s a moot point though, as Dean wins. He correctly picks the idol nullifier as the most powerful of the three, and the most useful to him, given his knowledge about Janet’s idol. He lies back at camp, both about having the idol nullifier and about losing his vote. The first part I get. No need to put up the hackles of someone you might want to use it on. But why lie about losing? Granted, it makes you less of a threat, but also means people won’t want to strategize with you. Dean corrects this by informing Dan, Tommy, and Lauren about what really went down, but this seems like it would backfire to me as well. After all, now you’ve proven to your allies that you lied to them, and are now more of a threat than you were previously. Sure enough, Tommy now says that Dean is maybe not as sure a bet as he thought, and may need to be eliminated. Not sure I buy his logic 100%, but I can see where he’s coming from.

CHALLENGE TIME! And yes despite overall being a “generic obstacles with puzzle at the end” challenge, this one gets my seal of approval for two reasons: One, it features dizzy people, which is always a riot, and two, the puzzle is quite creative. It’s another word puzzle, which Eliane is mad at, but rather than individual cubes, the letters are now basically on Tetris blocks, which have to be stacked to make the phrase “This game will mess with your mind”. Creative, challenging, and even the puzzle phrase is kind of clever. Hey, the challenges have been really repetitive of late, so I’ll take what I can get.

With this sort of challenge it all comes down to the puzzle. Dean wins, though since no one else seemed to make actual words (at least ones that related to the show; Dan’s “Sith” was amusing), it’s not too surprising. Good for him, but way to cut the tension, show! Since Lauren’s been presented as the only viable target, she’s obviously going to be the next to go. Sure, Tommy brings up Elaine to the group as a whole, which makes sense. Elaine is the only threat left bigger than Lauren. But soon enough, we’ll get a confessional from Tommy saying that they need to go after Lauren. Yep, there he goes talking about throwing a vote on… Noura? Wow, this really is Evil Tommy. That’s a bona fide grudge and everything. Apart from that, there’s really no reason to go for Noura. Sure, she’s just the decoy vote, and Elaine is the main target, but what happened to Lauren? Surely she’d be a prime decoy vote.

Oh well, at least it creates a bit more tension. Elaine and Lauren realize that if Dan is voting for Noura, they can use their votes plus Janet to get her out, sparing the pair of them. A great plan for Elaine, bad for anyone else. Jumping into Tribal Council shows us why. Everyone naturally talks about how tough the game is now they’re down to the finals, but the main story of the night is Elaine. She again bemoans her bad luck, and gets a big speech about how she keeps on fighting until her torch is snuffed, and gets a lot of love from the players as a result. A very touching moment that makes her WAY too dangerous to keep around. The jury loves her. Let her get anywhere near, and you’re screwed. Elaine makes the best argument she can, suggesting she be kept around as basically a shield, an alternate target so no one looks too closely at you. Sort of what Spencer was to Tony on “Survivor Cagayan”. And that’s a good argument… for when you’ve got a bunch of people left. Even not knowing what happens at the end of this episode, you’ve got at most three votes after this one left, and Elaine is no slouch in challenges. She could easily win her way to the end, and swipe that million-dollar check that’s so rightfully yours. I’m not saying Elaine has a better argument to make at this juncture, but I am saying that her best argument falls kind of flat.

In keeping with the overall pattern of this season, Elaine goes home. She is not sent out with the awesome music, but I’m not sad about that. After how heartfelt the Tribal Council was, it would have been inappropriate. I am sorry that Elaine is gone, however. Smart move though it may have been, Elaine was that rare combination of good character and good strategist that this show so richly needs. She was a bright spot in a season that gets darker and darker still, and she will be sorely missed, particularly over Noura, who just doesn’t do it for me. I look forward to Elaine’s inevitable return, unless the show gets cancelled before they get the chance.

But now, you may be noticing that this blog is not ending despite having reached its natural endpoint, just as viewers noticed that she show was not going to credits despite the vote-out having taken place. We skip the fallout from Tribal Council and cut to the next day, where Jeff Probst is walking to camp. Sadly, this is not some new twist in the game, but an old plotline rearing it’s ugly head. There, shoved into the last minute or so of the show, is the reveal that Dan has been removed from the game, and will not be allowed to sit on the jury. Tommy bemoans in confessional how this screws up his game, and we go out on a card saying that Dan was removed for being inappropriate with a producer.

Allow me a second here to go find my “MORONS” megaphone. It may be a little dusty from “Survivor One World” but I’m sure it’s around somewhere. Ah, there it is. Now, if I may…

WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH THIS SHOW? OH, SO IF A PLAYER COMPLAINS ABOUT SOMEONE TOUCHING THEM INAPPROPRIATELY, THEY GET OFF WITH A “WARNING” THAT CONVEYS NOTHING, BUT AS SOON AS IT HAPPENS TO A PRODUCER, THE PLAYER HAS TO GO? WHAT THE HELL KIND OF STANDARD IS THAT? DO THEY THINK WE’RE THAT STUPID? THAT WE WON’T NOTICE? ARE WE SOME KIND OF JOKE TO YOU? Now, I already hear the counterargument: “Well, Dan received a warning, and this was his last strike after the warning.” To that, I say, “THEN WHY THE HELL DIDN’T HE GET A WARNING THE FIRST TIME, AND WHY THE HELL DIDN’T HIS SECOND VIOLATION WITH KELLEE RESULT IN THIS? I swear, I’m even more pissed off now than I was at the Kellee boot with all this. Yes, production handled that poorly, but this just feels like them doubling down on the whole fiasco. Not only did their negligence allow this to happen again (true, they’re not responsible for Dan’s actions, but they are responsible for the safety of their cast, and Dan’s continued presence jeopardized that), but it comes across as them being held to a different standard than the cast, which is just wrong on so many levels. But the real kicker here for me is that, for all the flaws of Kellee’s boot, the show at least showed us what happened, and how and why it went wrong. They were up front about the incident. By both not showing us any of the leadup and sticking it at the end of the episode, it feels like they were trying to sweep this unpleasantness under the rug, which is the complete wrong move. Show it, own up to it, and explain what you’re going to do to prevent it in the future. For as uncomfortable as it is, lay it bare to show how wrong it is. Now, they say the incident happened off-camera, but you’ve already had the producer’s voice in the show. Why not bring the producer on to explain what happened? And if, for some dumb reason, that’s not possible, at least have more buildup than this. Have the players talk about Dan being taken away, and what they think’s going on. Don’t just shove this at the end of the episode like it’s nothing. Because it’s not.

Ugh, this episode was never going to get a rave review from me. True, it’s hardly the worst this show has produced, and I would even say is overall a pretty good episode of the season for how it bookends some plot lines (the talk of gendered alliances), and some nice human moments (the sign of lost souls), but is overall lost in the quagmire of pointless strategizing and a continued emphasis on the philosophy of “You need idols and advantages to win this game.” But the whole Dan thing coming back, and being so poorly handled, just makes me sick, and puts this episode down at the bottom of the season, along with the OTHER Dan is a creep episode. Still, if there’s one silver lining, his elimination this episode means I only have to rank five people left in who’s most to least likely to win. Speaking of which…

LAUREN-My top spot is always reserved for the person who “If they get to the end, they win.”, and this year that title goes to Lauren. She and Tommy have both played stellar social games, but Lauren also has an immunity win and higher visibility in her corner. Tommy’s a behind-the-scenes kind of guy, which is great for getting stuff done, less good for actually winning the game. With these victories, Lauren makes it a slam dunk for her to win if she gets to the end, but harder for her to actually do so.

TOMMY-Like I said, a stellar social game, but not many firm victories. If he eliminates Lauren, that’s a feather in his cap, and gets back any votes Lauren might siphon off of him. He says he’s down and out with Dan gone, but with everyone else recognizing Lauren’s threat level, I think he’s still got a decent shot. He beats anybody but her, and since everyone likes him, I don’t see them targeting him.

JANET-While not as social as Lauren or Tommy, Janet’s just likable in her own right. She is who she is, and won’t compromise that for anything. I get the feeling, if she gets to the end, the jury will respect that. Add to that some good plays when she was swapped to Lairo (the Tom boot is a particular feather in her cap), and I think Janet’s got a decent shot. It’s a testament to how good Tommy and Lauren’s social games are that they’re the only thing preventing a guaranteed win for Janet.

DEAN-Dean’s not out of the competition yet, but he’s got an uphill battle if he wants to win. True, he’s been the underdog with no real alliance, and so hasn’t pissed off anybody, plus is the last remaining Lairo. But tell me, what victories can Dean point to? Every move he’s made for himself has pretty much made him look like a goober, to the point that he can’t be taken seriously. True, he did play Kellee’s idol correctly, but Kellee can confirm that that move was more her than him, leading to that not really being a victory for Dean. He has a much better shot if he plays that idol nullifier correctly, but without that, I don’t see a Dean victory in the cards.

NOURA-No one respects Noura. No one understands Noura, and that includes Noura. This jury will not reward a crazy game. You want her in the end with you.

A quick heads-up: I stupidly forgot to ask for the day following the finale off. I’ll still watch it live, but if I have to work the next day, I just won’t have time to blog about it immediately afterwards. I promise, as always, not to get any other opinions until I blog, but it won’t be out until like Thursday or Friday instead of Wednesday night. Sorry for any inconvenience, but this doesn’t pay the bills for me.

Man, this show really has its priorities screwed up this season.

-Matt

Title Credit to Jean Storrs.

Idol Speculation: “Survivor Island of the Idols” Episode 11: Mostly Pointless

Here, we see the elusive “Live Tribal” in its natural habitat. Claimed sightings of this beast are common, but rarely are they correct identifications. While this one does seem confirmed by scientists, we also see the dangers this beast can pose to the ecosystem: Making everything pointless.

Having dispensed with a recap of previous episodes, the show now goes on a cutting spree, and cuts the very thing it replaced the recap with. Hence, we start things off at our reward challenge. As advertised, it’s the loved ones challenge, which is as nice and heartwarming as one would expect. There’s no cringe-worthy moments as the family members are introduced (but just you wait, the cringe is right around the corner), so we’ll just touch on a couple that either merit commentary or are particularly heartwarming. Janet’s husband comes out in a pink shirt, indicating that the family is having a girl. Nice bit of news, and a creative way for a gender reveal without being overblown. Dan has his 13-year-old son come on, which is a nice touch, since we don’t see it that often. However, I take issue with Probst calling him “The youngest person ever on ‘Survivor’.” Even leaving aside the various young kids you’ve given supplies to, have you perhaps forgotten Boston, the son of Shane Powers from “Survivor Exile Island”? He was on the show just as much, if not more than Dan’s son, and was also 13 years old at the time. I’m sure that Dan’s son probably wins out by a matter of months, but it’s the principle of the thing! I will not have “Survivor Exile Island” erased from continuity, dammit! It’s not “Survivor Edge of Extinction”! The winner for “Most Heartwarming Reunion”, though, goes to Eliane and her partner. It’s not as tearful as some others, but the pair clearly share a bond, and Elaine gets a good talk about how she wasn’t sure her partner’s children would accept their union. What goes unsaid, but also worth mentioning, is the bravery of them being a lesbian couple in Kentucky. We don’t get a confessional about it, but Kentucky is not the most LGBT friendly place on Earth, and now your relationship is being laid bare on national TV. That takes some guts, and sends a good message, but doesn’t drive it into the ground unnecessarily. It just lets a nice moment be, without needing to draw attention to “HEY! LOOK AT THE PROGRESSIVE THING WE’RE DOING!” Enjoy the compliment, show. It’s one of the few you’ll be getting tonight.

Our challenge is a generic obstacle course run in pairs. The challenge itself is not worth talking about, but I’ll note that our pairs are Dan and Noura, Dean and Elaine, Tommy and Janet, and Lauren and Karishma. Remember when I said that the show was doing a good job of not patting itself on the back unnecessarily? Yeah, throw that out the window. You see, Noura’s sister has some vision problems, and so can’t really see the challenge from the family gallery. As such, the show does the proper thing, and has her stand next to Probst so she can cheer appropriately with the rest of the family members. The trouble is that Probst needs to keep drawing attention to this fact, like it’s some big feat for the show to be fair to someone with vision trouble. It’s not like this is a common courtesy thing that you should have been doing regardless, right? At most, maybe mentioning it once as an explanation to the audience would have been appropriate. With how much Probst emphasizes it, it just feels forced and fake, like the show did this more to pat themselves on the back than to be fair to everyone. On a season that doesn’t need a more sickening taste in one’s mouth, this is just unfortunate.

I’d favor either Tommy and Janet or Dean and Eliane to win this challenge, but everyone manages to get to the last leg together, since it involves throwing a single sandbag onto a small platform (gee, haven’t seen that on “Survivor” before!). Tommy and Janet pull it out, though, only to be given the schmuck bait that is the family reward challenge. They get picnics with their loved ones, but now get to pick two more people to come with. Janet goes first, picking Dan. Now, despite me giving these two some flak, Dan is not the worst choice. With how high emotions run with this particular challenge, more than with any other reward challenge, you NEED to pick the swing votes to come along, lest they get mad and turn on you. While I wouldn’t describe Dan as a “swing vote” he has been shown to hold a grudge, so I could see the logic in picking him. What I CAN”T see is Tommy’s logic in picking Lauren. This is the LAST person Tommy should be picking. Everyone knows they’re together, and emphasizing that fact doesn’t help matters. Plus, if Lauren’s already loyal to you, you don’t need to earn that loyalty further. And perhaps you’ve forgotten how much Elaine’s been saving your butt in the past couple of episodes? Didn’t think maybe you could pay her back, while still keeping her loyal yet not taking her to the end? Noura, as we’ll soon see, would also have been a wise choice, but regardless, Tommy did a dumb.

Karishma’s on the warpath after the challenge, but before we get into that, we have to see our players and loved ones enjoying themselves. Nothing much comes of this, but they do scoff at the people they left back at camp. Lauren especially is dismissive of their prospects, stating that they have Noura wrapped around their fingers, and the group will in no way come together to make a plan to get one of that foursome out. At first, it seems like she might actually be right, since Noura is so busy ranting about how upset she is to be the only original Vokai left out of the reward that they simply won’t have time to strategize. However, our remaining players are rewarded for listening to Noura’s rant by having her declare loyalty to all of them. Everyone agrees that this foursome is in control, and needs to be broken up. Even Dean finally seems to be coming out of his “bro-down” reverie, and acknowledging that he needs a different strategy if he wants to get farther in the game. And while they celebrate, I have to take a moment to talk about what this says about Tribe dynamics.

Up until this point, the season’s done a good job of keeping the exact members of the dominant alliance under wraps. The Tommy/Lauren bond was tough to keep quiet, but exactly who else was in the majority was hard to pin down. This episode tells us that the core includes Janet and Dan, which would be fine if that made any sense. The Dan part is understandable, but where did Janet come from? Only a few episodes ago, she seemed to be the primary target of Tommy and Lauren. Now she’s with them? Either this is some next-level strategy we mere mortals cannot comprehend, or the show just purposefully lied to us. Kudos to them if they did, since they did it masterfully, but the fact still remains that this feels kind of cheap, especially since, for all the talk about how dynamic the alliances on this season are, it seems to be boiling down to “Original Lairo versus Original Vokai”. Because we’ve never seen that before. Frankly, the whole thing feels like a con. A well-made con, but a con nonetheless, and it retroactively sours me on the season somewhat. Because we didn’t have enough of that already.

Back to our strategizing four, they quickly realize that four is not enough, and so either need to pull in one more person or find an idol. Sadly, the go with the less-intriguing option “B”, leading Elaine to find an idol for the group’s use. They collectively agree to go for Lauren, since she’s the biggest threat in terms of the jury. Personally, despite his dumb move earlier, I’d say this is a feather in Tommy’s cap. Both he and Lauren have been living and dying by their social games, but the fact that Tommy’s well-liked, yet also not talked about as a threat, means, to my mind, he’s playing better than Lauren. Granted, this also means Tommy needs to get rid of Lauren before the end, lest she sweep up votes he could otherwise claim at Final Tribal Council, but still, good on him.

Our immunity challenge is, you guessed it, another endurance challenge, in this case the one involving holding a ball against a pole with a rolling pin. It’s really not worth mentioning, save for Lauren’s emotional fight. The woman was literally CRYING trying to win, so it was nice to see her effort rewarded, especially since Elaine is no pushover in this department either. That said, since Lauren was the ONLY target presented to us prior to the immunity challenge, it pretty much makes the first half of the episode POINTLESS!

Don’t worry, though, our next half isn’t much better. With Lauren no longer available, the new foursome switch to plan “B”. In this case, plan “B” is Tommy, since he’s “Lauren’s right-hand man”. I’d personally say it’s because he’s a major social threat, but they’re right for the wrong reasons. Can’t blame them too much. Things look even better for them when it turns out the other four are SO convinced of their superiority that they’re even going to split the vote between Elaine and Karishma. Karishma I get. If you’re not going to use her for her vote, all she’s good for is as a number for the other side, so why not get rid of her. But Eliane? You don’t know she has an idol, and she’s worked with you in the past. I’d have said get rid of Dean before her. Not targeting Dean works in their favor in the end, though, as Dean is our weak link this time. Now, some might say that Noura’s the weak link, but her craziness is well-established at this point. Dean’s the one who doubts, which seems somewhat justified as we see Noura tying herself up in knots trying to figure out the best move based on the possibilities. This is what she should be doing, of course, but she’s doing it in such a convoluted way that she’s just making herself more paranoid than necessary. Add onto that at least a bit of skepticism from the other four, and despite the relative pointlessness of the episode so far, we’ve still got some enjoyable misdirection.

Ah, but then we see exactly WHY nothing of consequence could happen before Tribal Council: Everything of consequence happens AT Tribal Council! Yes, while I think both fans and the show are too quick to call “Live Tribal” these days, I do think this is one case where things legitimately got shaken up at Tribal Council. We’re barely two “Generic Probst Questions” into the proceedings when Dean whispers to Tommy that his name’s come up, but that he (Dean) won’t go for it. At the time, I wasn’t sure if this was a double-bluff by Dean to look better towards Tommy on the jury, or if Dean was legitimately trying to blow up a plan that would benefit him. Having now seen the entirety of Tribal Council, I favor the latter explanation. From what little we’ve seen of Dean’s strategy, he’s been big on the physical threats teaming up, and I think he sees Tommy as a shield he doesn’t want to get rid of just yet, even though they’re all close to the end. That said, as Dean himself mentioned earlier, however bad he wants it, I don’t think it’s going to happen. As Dean demonstrated with Kellee, one saved vote does not buy loyalty. If the foursome left out of the reward are offering you a better deal, take it. Fortunately for Dean, he’s spared any backlash since people immediately turn to Noura to find out if she flipped. Since this is Noura, she goes off, and starts spilling the beans on everything. Now, a little bit of honesty coupled with a lie (“Yeah, they approached me, and I debated it, but I wasn’t going to do it.”) played off with skill might have helped Noura. I’m not sure she had the skill to do it well, but it would have been an attempt. But no, she spills everything, including the presence of Elaine’s idol, thereby killing any hope the foursome left out of the reward had of coming together. Noura caps off the performance by saying that Dean, not her, started this. Technically true, but Noura, when you make such a spectacle of yourself, and make the whole procedure worse for everyone, you might as well have.

I’ll spare you a blow-by-blow (both out of me being tired, and it needing to be experienced for oneself), but this is some great chaos. Unlike the chaos of, say “Survivor Game Changers”, we can follow this, but still have the pandemonium of lies being flung about, and people questioning people. Even Boston Rob and Sandra get some good commentary in, ripping Noura a new one for lying so poorly. This may be the first time I’m actually glad they’re at Tribal Council.

You may have noticed that I skipped over the smart mover for everyone. I’ve hinted at it, but not talked about it explicitly. That’s because, like this episode, none of it matters as of Tribal Council. Little strategizing happens, and what there was gets thrown off the crazy train. Noura seems to be the consensus boot, and at this point, I can’t really argue with it. Sure, she’s easy to beat in the end, but she’s now crossed to the point where she’s going full Keith Nale (“Survivor San Juan del Sur”) and giving away secrets she shouldn’t be giving away. This makes her a liability to everyone, a good consensus boot, and for the group that has been in power, keeps them in power.

And yet they go for Karishma. Not the worst target, but as I just laid out, I think not the best one either. On top of that, I’m sorry to see Karishma go. She was never my favorite player, but there was something intriguing about the way she just kept hanging on, despite constantly being the target. Much more fascinating than Noura’s general kookiness, in my opinion.

The last ten minutes of this episode were great! I just wish the first fifty justified them. Don’t get me wrong, this was a fantastic finale to the episode, probably the best of the season so far. Hell, it left Probst speechless. That in itself is a feat. But most of the rest of it just didn’t matter, because it all happened at Tribal Council. We could have had a ten-minute episode, and gotten just as much out of it. That makes for a real mixed bag. Next week promises some better intrigue. Hopefully it delivers.

-Matt

Title Credit to Jean Storrs.

Idol Speculation: “Survivor Island of the Idols” Episode 10: The Editors Go Crazy

The “Survivor” editing team. Some of the best at what they do. Purveyors of humor on many a season. Check out Russell Swan’s idol hunt on “Survivor Philippines” if you doubt my claim. Yet tonight, we get proof that there can be “Too much of a good thing”, and they weaken what was already a poor episode to begin with. So much so that the most exciting thing in this blog is going to be another edition of…

MATT’S MESS-UP!

Bit of a quick point, and actually a repeat of a point I made two blogs ago, but a missed point nonetheless. Amongst Missy’s arguments as to why she should stay, particularly after seeing Aaron leave at the previous Tribal Council, was a “People of color should stick together”, and an echo of Cirie’s point from “Survivor Game Changers” about the rarity of multiple women of color making the merge. A pretty solid, human moment, ruined once again by Probst’s need to inject himself into the situation, and to point out how much of a “moment” this is. Like I’ve said before, Probst, the way for you to strengthen these moments is to just LET THEM BE! It makes for a stronger message. When you try and constantly point them out, not only do you make us feel ill, but you weaken the moment overall as a result. Not saying that the argument would have changed the outcome of the episode or anything, but it would have been nice to just let a human moment be.

Speaking of Tribal Council, Lauren is initially worried about the outcome of the second one, so much so that she can’t even celebrate the ouster of Aaron. She and Tommy may not have been on the same team last episode, but they are on the same wavelength, both wanting Missy out to cement their power. Lauren, however, is pretty good at reading the room, and rightly predicts trouble for Tommy. Of course, as we know from having watched the episode, she needn’t have worried. Tommy returns, and the pair celebrate their good fortune. As well they should. They’ve cemented themselves as the Domenick and Wendell (“Survivor Ghost Island”) of the season: Savvy players that can run the season with little competition, with the only player savvy enough to stop them (Elaine, playing the role of Kellyn), being disinclined to do so. Glad all tension just went out of the season.

Yes, most everyone left has a reason to celebrate. About the only exception is Elizabeth, who just lost… Yeah, pretty much all her main allies. Put that way, she takes the whole thing quite well, stating that while she’s upset, she knows why it had to be done. Props to her for saying the right things to say in this situation. The read could have done with a bit more heart and sincerity in it, but much as I like Elizabeth, she has been kind of “flat” this whole season, so maybe it’s just her speaking style. No one seems to hold it against her, so in the end, I can’t really fault her.

The next morning, Tommy and Lauren regroup their strategy. Dean comes over and pitches his plan to get out what he calls the “goat army”, specifically Noura and Karishma. It’s basically his “meat shields” idea from last episode, minus the Aaron. Tommy admits he’s sympathetic, but also notes that Elizabeth is a major threat in confessional, and says he may need to go for her first. This is jumping the gun here, since I usually save my strategy thoughts for when targets start being finalized, but I will say that Tommy is absolutely correct here. Yes, you don’t want to go too big on the “get out the threats” route, since Tommy is fast becoming the biggest threat, but you can frame targeting Elizabeth not as a threat, but as an enemy. The trouble with Elizabeth is that she has no real allies right now, and no incentive to work with you. All this makes her a threat, even more so than the whole “Olympic Athlete” thing, and means she needs to go.

Someone else needs to go as well, though… To the Island of the Idols! Yes, the producer’s restraint has reached its limits (plus it actually fits within the time frame of the show now), and it’s time to send one person back. Continuing with our shout outs to “Survivor Ghost Island”, the selection method is exactly the same as the pre-merge selection for who goes to Ghost Island: Come to a unanimous decision, or draw lots. Unlike last time, some people are clamoring to go. And by some people, I mean Karishma and Lauren, the former because she’s still a major target, and the latter to consolidate power in her alliance. As always on “Survivor” social game wins out, and the tribe decides to send Lauren. Of course, Karishma could pull a Shirin (“Survivor Worlds Apart”) and be the dissenting voice that denies her, but as she rightly points out, making waves over such a little thing is more trouble than it’s worth.

After a “humorous” interlude involving a chicken stealing Sandra’s papaya, Lauren arrives and does her best impression of Amber Brkich (“Survivor The Australian Outback”), saying “Oh my God!” over and over. This pleases Boston Rob, and he bestows his favor upon Lauren. You see, up until this point, people have gotten “lessons” that are either things they genuinely need to work on, or things that are neutral to them. Here, Lauren gets a lesson in what is dubbed “situational awareness”, but is really “interpersonal awareness”, and either way, plays to Lauren’s strengths. Basically, she gets told the immunity challenge (which is a repeat from “Survivor Ghost Island”. What is up with all the references to that season this episode? Don’t get me wrong, it’s underrated, but it’s not great enough to be deserving of THIS much attention), as well as that it’s an eat or compete challenge for breakfast. She has to pick one potential winner of the challenge. Get it right, she gets an idol good for two Tribal Councils. Get it wrong, she loses her vote. As Lauren herself rightly points out, those aren’t good odds. You’re basically picking a 1/9 shot, and even if you eliminate half of the people for various reasons (challenge weakness or desire to eat), that’s still only a 25% chance that you win. Bad enough in and of itself, but after those crazy couple of Tribal Councils, every vote is important. For me, losing such a vote would be too big a risk. Boston Rob therefore decides to sweeten the pot with better odds (and not just seemingly better odds like he talked about doing pre-season) giving Lauren two picks instead of one. Objectively better odds, but I still say the risk is too great, even for Lauren with her reading of others. Lauren disagrees, however, and with the repeated flashbacks when discussing each person, she comes down on Elizabeth and Noura to win, since this challenge is an endurance challenge involving holding a ball against a wood block with an upward pull system. Not bad choices, though I’m surprised Elaine and Tommy weren’t in the mix.

Say, you know what we haven’t had in a while? Dean making a fool of himself! It seems despite the skepticism of Jamal’s “gift” from two episodes ago, people have now swung around to thinking the “legacy advantage” is real. I guess you did your job after all, Jamal. Not that it does you much good besides a satisfying “gotcha” since you’re already on the jury, but satisfying nonetheless. After getting confirmation from Janet on the veracity of the advantage, Dean decides to double down on the idiocy by plagiarizing the fake advantage, so that he can bluff with the fake and save the “real” fake for the final six. If this were a legit advantage, this would actually be kind of a smart play. But it’s not, and anyone with brain cells should realize that, so I’m not sorry Dean gets the dodo music here.

Only the return of Lauren could stop this madness, so return she does. When asked what went down, she talks in the same vein as Noura did during her trip (which should make everyone immediately suspicious), and reveals the challenge, as well as the eat or compete twist. It at first seems like she’ll continue keeping the nature of her twist a secret, but she spills the beans in the end. Granted, it’s only to Tommy, who’s a really good co-conspirator for her, so ultimately probably a good move. It just seems weird that the trend gets bucked NOW of all times. Since Tommy wants Lauren to have that idol (presumably she’s selling it as “an idol for both of us”), he goes around, talking up the feast aspect to those that Lauren didn’t bet on. Gotta admit, it’s good gameplay. If Lauren did the convincing, she’d be seen as suspicious (again, see Noura), but Tommy’s a natural salesman, and despite his closeness with Lauren, doesn’t come off as someone with an agenda.

Consequently, after Probst feigns indignation at the lack of reaction to the feast (the man HAD to know they’d been informed), six of the nine choose to sit out, a surprise even to me. Only Karishma, Noura, and Elizabeth choose to compete, better odds that Lauren could have possibly hoped for. Even better for her, Karishma is out in the first 30 seconds or so, guaranteeing her the idol no matter what. Even better for the audience, Karishma gets a really touching emotional moment where she breaks down about trying even when something doesn’t play to her strengths. Probst, while he addresses the moment, wisely lets it play out largely without commentary. About the worst that can be said is that the challenge is over quickly by endurance standards, though you knew that was coming. Probst talked up the 45-minute record like it was a major feat, but dude, we’ve seen 12-hour endurance challenges. Get that JV-junk out of here.

Noura ends up our victor, and kudos to her from learning from her mistake. She keeps going in the challenge in the hopes that it makes the feast last longer, before Probst puts the kibosh on it. We of course see Tommy and Lauren pick up the idol, but there’s not much beyond that. There’s very little strategizing to be done, since Elizabeth is largely a consensus boot (though Elaine isn’t terribly happy about it), and there’s enough of a majority to split the votes between her and Karishma. The only issue comes if one of them has an idol. Karishma is still reeling emotionally, and I hate to pick on her, but Noura stole her bag to look through it, and if NOURA is able to steal your bag, you must not be paying even the remotest bit of attention. About the only upside for Karishma here is that this is Noura, so despite finding a note and two things with seashells, she thinks there’s no idol.

In order to convince Karishma not to blow up the plan, Dan tells her the partial truth. Elizabeth being the target is correct, but he tries to sell her on Janet being the other swing vote. Karishma, being occasionally blind, but not stupid, sees through this, and goes to talk to Elizabeth. Fortunately Lauren can read lips, and so sees Dan’s name be brought up between the pair. Lauren initially tries to keep Dan contained when he wants to go over and bust up the conversation, but Dan cannot be contained. Dan, did you learn nothing from Missy last episode? Strong-arming Karishma is NOT the way to go. Consequently, now she’s bringing her idol, the ONLY reason you would have to vote her out, and no one even knows about that!

Our Tribal Council is unfortunately just as dull as the rest of the episode. The lowlight is Probst forcing racing metaphors into the conversation. Metaphors can be painful enough when they’re NOT obviously planned by production. Hell, Tommy had a decent one comparing making a decision about who to vote out to where to take his girlfriend to dinner, but you force in the racing one? Between this and the obvious boot, not even the presence of the awesome music can save this one, though it tries valiantly. It’s really bad when the highlight is Boston Rob and Sandra recapping what we saw EARLIER IN THE EPISODE!

The outcome may be obvious, but this is modern “Survivor”. Shenanigans must be had! Dean plays his “fake” fake Legacy Advantage, and does a poor job feigning surprise. Sadly, it also makes Tommy a moron, as he also believes in its veracity. It does, however, cause Karishma to play her idol, which I can’t fault her on. Hell, I might have played it last time if I were here, and given that she’s portrayed as the alternate boot here, I can’t fault her. What I CAN fault is Lauren playing her own idol on herself. Why? What possible reason did you have to think you were the alternate target? Better safe than sorry, I suppose, and since the idol was only good one more vote, you don’t lose much, but you don’t gain much either. The jury’s not going to look at you fondly for playing an idol incorrectly, compared to Karishma’s correct play tonight, and Tommy seemed a little miffed that a “shared” idol got played without his consent.

If one person comes off well from this Tribal Council, it’s Karishma. For reasons I still can’t fathom, she was the main target tonight, and negates seven votes against her. Good for her. For all my smack-talk, playing an idol correctly is hard, so kudos to Karishma for pulling it off. This leads to a tie between Elizabeth and Janet (presumably Karishma voted for Elizabeth, and Elizabeth voted for Janet), leading to the obvious outcome of Elizabeth going home. My, that was a convoluted way to get to the outcome we all knew was coming. Painful as it is to see one of my winner picks go home, I can’t say I’m too broken up about it. Elizabeth was by no means BAD to watch, but much like this episode, she just didn’t bring much to the table, and I can’t say her presence will be majorly missed.

How many ways can I say it? This episode was BORING! An obvious outcome, and so much time spent on flashbacks and on Island of the Idols, that the whole thing just felt like a chore. Granted, they didn’t have the best material to work with, but surely we could do better than this?

-Matt

Title Credit to Jean Storrs.

Idol Speculation: “Survivor Island of the Idols” Episode 9: The Cosby Show

MATT’S MESS-UP

A bit of a sober way to start the blog today, but I feel that’s what’s needed. As many of you know, the tagline of “Idol Speculation” is “My knee-jerk opinion that everyone is entitled to.” I hold myself to that, giving my unfiltered opinion immediately after the show. However, there are times where, with the benefit of hindsight, I change my mind. Last episode is one of those instances. I gave the episode some praise in my most recent blog, but the fact is that the more I think about it, the scummier I feel. So, let’s go through things item by item, and give my general thoughts on each part of the issue.

First, the couple of things I misinterpreted/failed to mention in my previous blog. A lot has rightly been made of Miss and Elizabeth basically using Kellee’s feelings about Dan to blindside her, notable later telling Dan that they said no such things. At the time, I paid this no mind, because my interpretation was that they DID feel that way, and they were lying to Dan to make HIM feel better, since it was better for their game. But no, it has come out that they used Kellee’s feelings, and yeah, that’s pretty scummy of them, and makes me think the less of them as a whole. Speaking of Dan, I failed to mention his muttered smugness towards the bootees of the previous episode, which, even with the most generous interpretation of Dan’s actions, is a low blow, dude.

But the big thing I want to talk about is the production side of things here. I wrote a lot of praise for production on the previous episode. I felt they dealt with the situation in a sober and serious manner. Then, as is my tradition, I go and read other people’s thoughts on the episode, and, to put it mildly, they did not agree with me. In fact, they brought up a number of points that I agreed with. Notably, that they should have had this talk with Dan about his behavior BEFORE the issue got this far, and that Kellee should have been able to have a say at the first Tribal Council after she was voted out. Admittedly, the latter could be argued as a violation of game rules, but given that it led to a situation where people were talking ABOUT her when she was RIGHT THERE, I feel like this is one area where we could bend the rules. All that plus my dislike of Probst for forcing a “moment” at the second Tribal Council really makes me unhappy with production over all these proceedings. That said, I do cut production a little slack, and I’ll explain why in the next paragraph.

Let me preface everything I’m about to say by pointing out that yes, production could have handled things better, and no, none of what I’m about to say is an excuse for any of their actions. But I think production was in a no-win situation with this whole affair. The trouble is that production wants to strike a balance between doing what’s morally right, and what’s “fair” in terms of the game. And unfortunately, past precedent with regards to sexual misconduct says to not interfere. I mentioned the “Grindgate” incident from “Survivor Thailand”, and I think that was heavily on their minds when deciding what to do. After all, in that situation, which is comparable in seriousness to the current situation, production let the contestants sort things out. Now again, that doesn’t mean that’s all they should think about in this situation. But consider in terms of lawsuits: If you’re on the production of the show, are you more worried about being sued by Kellee, who has had to sign away a lot of her rights in the contracts they have every contestant sign, thereby giving production something of a barrier to a lawsuit, or Dan, who if you remove him, has fair grounds to say that he was denied money and placement in the game by production? Again none of this makes production ok, but I understand why they did what they did.

For me, there’s also an element of production learning from all this. Yes, as I’ve said, we’ve had situations like this previously, from “Grindgate” to the Richard and Sue situation in “Survivor All-Stars”. But that was a very different era in terms of our conversations about sexual harassment, so for me, this is really the first time that “Survivor” has really had to confront this issue, and their part in it, in this environment. Thus, I give production the benefit of a doubt, and think they’re just making a mistake, rather than acting with malice aforethought. That said, I’m all for questioning authority, and completely understand if people think that production does not deserve that chance. If something like this happens again, and they react in the same way, I’m right there with you. If you feel that this is so triggering that you simply cannot watch “Survivor” anymore, I understand, and do not judge. But I, as an individual, am willing to give production a chance to show that they’ve learned and do better. If they don’t, it might be enough to stop watching the show.

Given how little happens in this episode, this blog may already be half-over. Soberly heading back to camp after a heavy Tribal Council, Janet notes that she’s royally screwed, thereby ensuring that Janet is safe. Janet, however, is not the only person ensuring their safety through edit at this point. Get ready for a heaping helping of Karishma this episode. She was pretty quiet last episode, but she’s back with a vengeance now. She comes in literally screaming, as a rat apparently crawled in her mouth. So in other words, she had the natural reaction. Elizabeth is pretty beat up in the morning as well. Seeing people cuddling, I thought Dan STILL somehow hadn’t got the message about his behavior, but no, it’s just the rain. Again, understandable. Karishma will not be denied, however. She plops herself down in the hammock, leading Noura to a confessional tirade about how Karishma isn’t doing anything for the tribe. A bit hard to deny, since Karishma seems to be sleeping sitting up. Still, Noura is not to be denied, and badgers Karishma into going on a coconut hunt.

This is a big mistake. If someone’s a slouch around camp, and you want them out, you encourage that behavior. Play it up. Keep them in everyone’s minds, and let them see the burden this player is to the tribe. Plus, if you send them off, they have a chance of finding an idol. Which is exactly what Karishma does. Admittedly this idol seemed to “pop” a lot more from its hiding place than previous idols, but I don’t mean to belittle Karishma’s accomplishment. An idol find is an idol find, and Karishma is rightly proud of herself. She’s also right that she needs it, since as she comes back from an hour of hunting with two measly coconuts, we see Noura, Lauren, and Tommy talking about the need to get Karishma out, with Janet as a backup. Needing an excuse, Karishma plays up her illness. Lauren, out of compassion, suggests calling for the doctor, which Karishma denies, though I’m not sure why. If the doctor comes, and there’s not really anything wrong with you, so what? Sure, it looks like you’re playing up the “woe is me” bit a bit if there’s really nothing wrong with you, but hey, you’re already on the bottom, and you lose a lot of goodwill by being so insistent, so what’s the harm?

One point about this season as a whole: While we don’t have any “Island of the Idols” this episode, which I’m overall for (though the title of the season is starting to seem like a lie), and I don’t feel it usually takes up too much time, I think we’ve missed something here. It’s becoming clear this new merge tribe has multiple shelters. Why? Was it a space thing? Because of Dan? Alliance segregation? Gender segregation? There’s a story here, a fascinating insight into the dynamics of the tribe, and I’m sad we don’t get it.

Off to our immunity challenge. Yes, already. You see, the show is doing the “Divide into two groups and vote separately” thing they tried on “Survivor Ghost Island”. Not the worst idea to try again, but since that fell fairly flat this time, I’m surprised to see it come back. Now is not the time, however, purely because of the odd number of contestants left, making for uneven teams. There’s an issue of fairness and number of votes there right off the bat, but there’s more issues I’ll get to in a bit. Second, while both this season and “Survivor Ghost Island” had fairly solid majorities, it felt more solid on the latter season, making the twist seem more of a necessity. Here, there’s more flexibility, and thus, to me, less need for the twist. As to the challenge itself, it’s pretty lame. Balancing on a beam, contestants keep a ball circling the inside of a hoop. Last people standing for each team wins immunity. Definitely a tough challenge, and requires a different skill set than most challenges, but it’s just dumb-looking, and doesn’t do enough to distinguish itself from other challenges. Oh, and Probst, no, not all strategies are created equal. Spinning the ball fast does not take significantly more energy than spinning it slowly, and the extra force helps keep the ball in the hoop. Fast is the way to go.

After the challenge starts, Probst pulls a classic “dick move” by telling them the teams are also playing for reward AFTER the challenge starts. The last person standing overall wins peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for their whole team, as well as the right to go to Tribal Council second. This is why, in the issue of fairness, the teams NEEDED to be equal. Could you really not have held this challenge for one more episode cycle?

In the end, the edge doesn’t matter, however. That’s because the winner on Purple is Noura, having beaten out Dean, Dan, Aaron, Janet, and Lauren. Noura being Noura, was not paying attention to the instructions, and drops her hoop in celebration, leaving just Elaine and Missy to battle it out on Orange, Tommy, Karishma, and Elizabeth having fallen out already. Good for them, but nothing much exciting about the challenge.

Probst sends the orange team back to the Lumuwaku camp, while he twists the knife further for the purple team. They’re sent out the old Lairo camp, confirming by proxy that the merge camp is the Vokai camp. Janet is naturally targeted, but realizes this, and so seeks to turn the narrative around. Noura is of the same mind. She may be a bit on the crazy side, but even she can see the blindingly obvious. Aaron has won a bunch of immunity challenges. He’s a major player in the majority alliance, which a number of players in this group have a reason to want to break up. If you’re outside of the majority, like Janet or Dean, it keeps things chaotic and gives you a chance to get back in the majority. f you’re a part of that majority, like Lauren, Noura, and Dan, it gets rid of a major threat and original Lairo member in that alliance, thereby improving your overall odds. Since this group is smart overall, pretty much everyone readily agrees to this plan. But, of course, we need someone to do a dumb in order for us to have tension at this Tribal Council. Dean, as is his want, obliges by talking about wanting to keep “threats” around so he isn’t targeted. Not the worst justification I’ve heard, but Dean, even if you’re fairly strong, you don’t LOOK the part. You’ve got room to maneuver if that’s the case, and any shakeup is a good shakeup for you. Dean’s decent at persuasion, though. He even persuades Dan that he’s a challenge threat. Dan, “challenge threat” is not how I think of you, and I would say that even before the events of last episode. It’s Dan’s musings about his place in the game that transition us to the Lumuwaku camp. A fun transition, but I do wish it was someone other than Dan doing the narration.

Karishma is so obvious the plan to be the target tonight, and thanks to her idol, so obviously not going, that we don’t even get any lip service to the idea. Perhaps that’s because everyone’s lips are full of peanut butter, but even when Missy is capable of speaking again, she’s going with a different plan. Yes, it’s time for that foreshadowing from the swap to pay off. Missy still wants to split Lauren and Tommy up, and to be fair, this is the ideal time to do it. You could make an argument that Karishma pulled something (even not knowing she has an idol), so that Lauren has no hard feelings towards you, while still severing her options. And, of course, anything that keeps Karishma safe is good for her. So why is Missy trying to so hard to torpedo her own plan? Seriously? I get that she’s a bit authoritative, but Missy, you’d been so good at persuasion before. I’ve seen worse, but it really felt even to me, and definitely to Karishma, that Missy was bossing her around. Even so, Missy was in a recoverable position, but then tried to stop Karishma from leaving the clearly uncomfortable conversation, and would not let up on her afterward. You really think this is the way to Karishma’s heart?

Missy then makes a second mistake, though I think this one’s more understandable. Being allied with Elaine, Missy fills in Elaine on the boot out Tommy plan. Elaine, however, is not on board, due to her bond with Tommy! Yes, that very special bond with Tommy that supersedes the bond she has with Missy, who she’s been allied with and on the same tribe as since the beginning of the game! A bond so special, we’re not hearing about it before tonight! Look, I get that Tommy’s thing is “the social game”, but if a bond is this strong, perhaps a bit of foreshadowing would be nice. Then again, maybe Elaine’s just feeling confident because of the immunity necklace. She’s certainly doing better at persuading Karishma than Missy, being gentle and kind and understanding. Let it not be said that Missy does not learn from her mistakes, as she talks more gently with Karishma afterward, and makes it more of a conversation. Karishma admits to being conflicted, stating that it’s a battle between her emotions, which are not happy with Missy, and her intellect, which says Tommy is the smarter move. This is really the main disadvantage of the episode: The less intriguing group is going second, making for a weaker finish. For all my snark at Dean, there’s real debate as to whether Aaron or Janet would go home. Aaron’s the clearly smarter move, but I could see this group not playing optimally. Here, however? Time and again, Karishma’s voted with Missy, and there was the foreshadowing that Tommy and Lauren would be broken up. The only things working in Tommy’s favor. His and Elaine’s “bond” that only came up this episode, and him saying he connects with Karishma, despite her mentioning last episode, that Tommy wouldn’t talk to her. Yeah, Tommy is toast, which is unfortunate, as he and Janet are really the only players left that I unequivocally like.

We get a brief scene at the old Lairo camp, with Elaine’s confessional transitioning us again. That’s the coolest thing, though, as nothing much comes of the conversation. Nothing much comes of the Tribal Council either. I’m still not a fan of Rob and Sandra commenting overall, but this first Tribal Council needed it. There was NOTHING going on. Rob noting Dean rolling up his sleeves is fascinating in comparison. Actually, Rob betting on Aaron going, while Sandra betting on Janet helps add to the mystery, as the narrative so far this season is that Sandra is right in her predictions, while Rob is wrong. Adds more to the mystery. However, with a lack of awesome music this group does the smart thing, and Aaron goes home. I’m not sorry to see him go. It’s impressive that he came back from his first episode blindside, and he did have really cool socks, but the dude was at best boring and at worst a bit arrogant. Plus, Janet is fun character and a wonderful human being. Happy to have her around any day. That said, this really seals Tommy’s fate, as seeing Aaron on the jury indicates a “vote out the men” strategy that Karishma is likely to go along with.

Our second Tribal Council is much more lively, owing to Missy’s self-sabotage. I’m still certain that Tommy is going home, but Missy is doing everything in her power to convince me otherwise. After rallying to have a good conversation with Karishma, she’s now going on about how they don’t get along. Granted, Missy did warn Karishma that they would need to bash her, and I applaud her for sneaking in calling jurors Jamal and Kellee “threats”, thereby pandering to them for potential jury votes, while still having it sound natural. It seems, however, that Karishma is not as logical as she says. She flips to vote out Missy. I would complain about Karishma making a bad move, since Missy has been in her corner far more than Tommy, but I can’t because I’m too busy doing my happy dance! After effectively having “the bad guys” win last episode, it’s nice to see one of the people involved get a comeuppance. Plus, once again, any emphasis on the social game is fine by me.

But who should get credit for this move? When Missy asks what happened, Tommy pulls a “don’t screw with me”. But Elaine, in whispers, says that it was her. She gets the credit from Missy, but at what cost. Blatantly violating the “Need to bring me your torch” directive, she whispers to Elizabeth that Elaine needs to die. Elaine, I applaud your jury management, but it doesn’t do you much good if you’re on the jury.

This episode is solid. The few out-of-nowhere plot points kind of drag it down, but overall a decent episode. That said, it’s not enough, and I don’t think anything would be enough. For better or for worse, this season has become like anything associated with Bill Cosby. It can be good quality, it can bring you joy, but with recent developments, it’s going to feel a bit icky watching it. This is a shame, since I like this cast at least ok overall, and there is a lot good to watch here. But now, it’s mostly going to be marred by the spectre of this incident. Between the lackluster last season, controversy this season, and, if the rumors are true, a completely chaotic and idiotic next season, this show may be finally pushing me to quit watching.

-Matt

Title Credit to Jean Storrs.

Idol Speculation: “Survivor Island of the Idols” Episode 8: Behind the Scenes

First off, my apologies for the lateness of this blog. I usually try to spot these things ahead of time, but didn’t anticipate the merge episode being double-length. Couple that with me needing to get up at my usual time for work, plus the blog both starting later and being extra long, and you’ve got a recipe for a blog you’ve got to wait for. That said, I’ve avoided reading other people’s thoughts on the episode, so you still get my unfiltered opinions. And ooh boy, this is going to be unlike most other episodes you see me blog.

Questions abound at Lairo as they return from Tribal Council, as one would expect after a blindside. Here, we see the pitfall in Kellee hinging her plan on Noura voting the way she expects. Not only is Noura a bit unreliable in this regard, but also tends to have a bit of a problem keeping her mouth shut. Questions emerge about who the second vote for Jack was, and Noura initially plays it off quite well, giving a pretty good dumbfounded look. However, after seemingly no pressure, Noura caves and says she was the second vote. Noura then gets questioned on why, and gives up that someone told her to make this move. Noura further professes loyalty to the person, saying she won’t betray her. Five seconds later, Noura is throwing Kellee under the bus. Again, great convoluted plan, Kellee! Jamal and Janet are naturally the most upset about this (being the most gung-ho about voting out Dean), and go over and talk with Kellee. Kellee offers up no real defense, but then Jamal and Janet offer up no real anger. Evidently Jamal is learning from his reaction to the Molly boot. Still, this does not look good for Kellee, which she realizes.

With confirmation that yes, idols can be found at camp now (Jamal having not been to the Island of the Idols at this point most likely means they’re not exclusively there), we get an idol hunting montage. Everyone on the tribe’s in on it. Even Janet, who just last episode said she didn’t want to put a target on her back, is looking. Noura frets about snakes, which makes me wonder why she doesn’t poke around with a stick first. Kellee, being the smartest of the bunch left (convoluted plan notwithstanding), ends up finding the idol, which is wrapped in orange paper. Now, this might just be because the idol’s on Lairo now, but I wonder if Kellee inadvertently found Chelsea’s idol that she never got to play instead. Not that it makes much of a difference in the grand scheme of things, but a fun little trivia note if so.

Not long after, the tribe gets a not that says “Pack your things”, which some immediately say means “merge”. Um, guys? I see the logic there, but a bit of a jump if you ask me. Sure enough, though, our remaining 13 players are whisked off to a feast, and some new blue buffs. This is pretty standard fare, so while our tribe members are celebrating, let’s talk about the new tribe name, Lumuwaku. Give it credit that it’s one of the longest merge tribe names we’ve had in a while that isn’t a repeated syllable. Although it’s not mentioned in the show proper, we also get the backstory behind this name. As a tribute to loved one’s back home, it’s a misappropriation of “Love You, Miss You, Really Wanna Kiss You”. Kind of cheesy, but it does make for a multi-layered name. I’m cool with it.

The game must recommence, though, and Tommy is the one to bring us back. He talks about how easy it would be for the original Vokai to sweep the original Lairo, being up 7-6. Certainly Jamal seems on board with the idea, despite being the one remaining guy who has been REPEATEDLY burned by the original Vokai. Tommy, however, wants to keep his options open. So, he reconvenes with Kellee. Remember how tight they were? How they worked together? How they basically made the decisions for their tribe early in the game? Yeah, throw that out the window. Tommy suggests she and Janet come on board with the new Vokai and run the game. Kellee says no, citing that Missy is a threat. This, to Tommy, means original tribal lines are dead, and he needs a mix to win the game. Look, Tommy, I want to like you, I really do, but this is just stupid! After one failed pitch, which you did a poor job on (he really should have emphasized using Kellee and Janet to oust the four remaining Lairo on that side, to give Kellee and incentive to rejoin), yo just give up on that advantage. Need I remind you that just two episodes ago, you were betrayed by the old Lairo on your tribe? And now you want to work with them? Where the hell did this come from? Look, the philosophy is sound. Work with a coalition, not just a simple majority. In general, I can get behind that. But Tommy, when your game so far has been about getting everyone to like you, and then you suggest betraying people for little reason? Doesn’t seem very likable to me. And again, what incentive does Tommy have for sticking with the new Vokai? Dan and Lauren I get, but the other four are clearly against you. If you can’t pull in some others (like, say, Kellee and Janet), you’re just dooming yourself to fifth place at best. Doesn’t sound very good. I still like the guy, but he REALLY dropped the ball strategy-wise here.

It seems that he and Lauren are all-in on this plan, though, as Lauren goes and informs Missy of Kellee’s plan to target her, cementing Kellee as a target a the upcoming Tribal Council. Look, I get that Kellee is a threat. She needs to go at some point. But right now, for Tommy and Lauren, she’s a USEFUL threat. Let her take the brunt of attacks for making moves, get out a few old Lairo to cement your majority, then blindside her when the time is right. Sure, she has an idol, but you can’t know that! On top of that, Missy is also a threat! Possibly the one person who can unite the old Lairo! And you’re just kowtowing to her right now. If you two get voted out, at this point, you deserve it. Lauren further advises Missy that she ought to win immunity. More on that later.

And now we come to something unlike anything I’ve yet blogged about. An entire segment of rarely-seen footage on “Survivor”. I’m talking, of course, about a peek behind the scenes of how the show gets made.

Now, we know conceptually that this is a show being filmed. There are camera crews with sound crews watching these contestants every minute of every day. Players aren’t just talking to themselves in confessional; they’re talking to a producer who’s asking them questions. But it’s a mark of the professionalism of the show that you so rarely see that. Sure, there’s occasionally times in the show proper where they make their presence known. The challenge on “Survivor Kaoh Rong” where three people got heat stroke comes to mind. The most infamous is probably the “He’s burned pretty bad, Terry.” from “Survivor The Australian Outback.” But usually that happens in the presence of a real medical emergency, where making a show takes a back seat, priority-wise, to saving people’s lives. Here, there’s no immediate danger, but they show us footage that clearly shows production, as well as giving us what I believe is our first ever on-screen producer sound-byte, in order to show us the gravitas of the situation.

And what situation could be so damning that this was needed? Well, Dan’s hands are finally coming to a head. And leg. And chest. And pretty much any female body part they can find. Yes, Kellee may want to vote our Missy, but she’ll still commiserate with her about what a creep Dan’s being. This leads to a flashback montage where we see various shots of Dan putting his hands on people (both ones we’ve seen before, and ones we haven’t) as they’re described. One could argue that it’s a little cheap that we’re just learning about some of this stuff now, but I think it works. Dan’s handsiness is well-established at this point, and since we do get some old footage, it stays in good continuity with the new. Kellee understandably gets somewhat emotional about this, given that she’s had a problem with this before, and despite her talks, it only seems to be getting worse. This is where the producer comes in: to ask if she wants him removed from the game. When she says know, he informs her that she’s always free to say so if she’s uncomfortable.

Now, I’ll be getting into the ramifications for the show as a whole in a minute, but I want to take some time out to discuss the rules conundrum this presents. “Survivor” has relatively few rules about what you can and can’t do in terms of the game, with two hard and fast exceptions to that. You cannot intentionally hurt someone, and you can’t conspire to share the prize money. Clearly, Dan has not done the latter, and you could argue he hasn’t done the former. The former rule usually refers to physically hurting someone, and while Dan is emotionally hurting someone, there’s no physical damage here. As Dan himself will later claim, it’s also possible there’s no intentionality to it. Yet, his removal for this is still discussed. My guess is that they’re including sexual harassment under “physical harm”, and Dan’s actions at the very least border up on this area, given the experiences of the women. Good on the show for being progressive, I say.

Know what else I’ll praise the show for? This whole segment. Yeah, it’s not the only time we’ve seen the production side of things, but it’s one of the most extensive, and it’s a fascinating look. Plus, this would have been so easy to sweep under the rug. Jumping ahead a great ways, while this does come up in conversation a lot, and will be the major focus of the second Tribal Council, Dan faces little in the way of comeuppance for his actions here. The show could easily have gotten away with just showing the complaining to explain why the subject comes up later on in the episode. They cynical might say the show HAD to acknowledge the role it had in this whole scenario, since Janet will later make reference to “the powers that be”, but to me, this comes off as the show saying “Hey, for all that this is a game, we take this shit seriously. This is how it went down, and this is how we handled it.” The only editorializing comes from the players themselves. Scenes are presented, shown, and discussed, all with little fanfare. This culminates in a card from the show as we go to commercial, stating that production talked with all individuals, as well as the group as a whole, and Dan in particular, about proper conduct. Again, could be covering their asses, but I think the show was trying to handle a delicate situation maturely.

Off to our immunity challenge, and as you’d expect, it’s another endurance challenge involving balancing balls. Honestly, I don’t know why I even both explaining these anymore, since they all just blend together. What is more noteworthy is how obvious it is that Missy will win. We had the foreshadowing from her and Lauren, plus these sorts of challenges tend to favor the women. All that makes for a greater surprise, then, when Missy falls out. She lasts a good way in, but still falls short. Hell, none of the women make the finals, as it comes to a showdown between Aaron and Jamal. Aaron takes it when Jamal gives out of nowhere and seems unable to get up. Aaron does the smart thing and checks in on his victory before going over to help Jamal, though I’m glad he did help. Good in terms of keeping up the mystery, bad in terms of having a coherent story. As to our individual immunity idol of the season? Well, it’s better than the tribal one, though it’s not saying much. They keep with the Easter Island Head thing, but add some artfully burned bamboo to make it look creepy. I’ve seen worse, but this one’s not going down in the history books by any stretch.

Kellee is, of course, the main target for the night, but we need some plausibility that someone else will go home instead. There are two ways we get this. One is Dean. While the new Vokai members have a majority on their own, they want as many people in on the vote as possible. As such, Tommy and Lauren talk to Dean about voting for Kellee. Unbeknownst to them, however, Dean feels some debt to Kellee, owing to her saving him last episode. Nothing comes of it yet, but it is a plot thread to bear in mind. Another is Kellee not being content with just one idol. Recognizing that merges often have multiple idols, she goes hunting and sure enough finds a blue idol. While recent track records (Tony Vlachos, Jeremy Collins) would indicate having two idols simultaneously as being a good thing, I still tend to favor the James Clement (“Survivor China”) model, where they make one overconfident, and more trouble than they’re worth. Still Kellee is definitely smarter than James, so she’s still got a chance to make this work.

But of course, all this would be worthless without another target in case Kellee does play her idol. Jamal, as one of the more sensitive people to topics like this, pitches voting out Dan due to the controversy surrounding him. Not a bad idea, when the merge is this big. Rather than going for the big move, merges like this tend to move for the consensus boot, just to ensure the safety of the group as a whole, and avoid the headache of strategizing with so many numbers. Actually, for Tommy and Lauren, voting out Dan would probably be the BETTER move for them, since they piss off fewer people this way. But no, they’re still stuck on the Kellee thing. Whoopee.

Good or bad, this Tribal Council is LONG! You’d think with the surface-level tribe dynamics, this would be an open and shut Tribal Council, but no, we have long discussions and lots of double-talk. Probably the two standout moments (at least the two that stand out nearly 24 hours later) are Dean’s “I’ve gotta be honest.” comment, since his delivery and editing are the one thing that really make it seem like he might blab to Kellee, thus getting her to play her idol. The other is the masterful play by Lauren. Kellee, during voting, looks at her and asks if they’re good. Lauren nods and assures her they are. A simple lie, but brilliantly played off by Lauren. It’s a brilliant play for what I’ve emphasized is the wrong move, but brilliant nonetheless. And all capped off with the awesome music.

We get a commercial break as the votes are tallied, trying in vain to convince us that Dan will go. But no. Doesn’t work. Look, the controversy around Dan is palpable, but if people were more concerned about that than the game, he would have been ejected before this Tribal Council. People are focussed on gameplay now, and the “strategists” have targeted Kellee. Sure enough, she doesn’t play her idols and goes. A dumb move, and one that I can’t even support from a viewer’s perspective. I don’t think Dan is the scum of the Earth or anything, but he’s brought very little, apart from controversy. He’s Ted Rogers (“Survivor Thailand”) lite. Kellee, while making some dumb moves recently, has brought strategy to the game, and crazy, out of the box thinking, which we always need more of. Point being, I’m very much in favor of her getting a second chance somewhere down the line. Not the greatest game ever played, but a strong showing for a first time.

Naturally, with a blindside, there’s going to be fallout. Janet, Jamal, Noura, and Karishma were all left out of that particular vote, and all have a reason to be upset. One person usually takes point at times like these, and as you might expect, that person is Janet. What you might not expect is her reasoning. From what we saw, Jamal just threw a name out there he thought people could get behind, not being on any sort of moral crusade. It was for Janet, though. She talks with Tommy and Lauren about the why of it. The pair really don’t do a good job explaining themselves, when really all they need to do is say “The talk with production handled it, so we went with what we thought was best from a gameplay perspective.” In spite of their waffling answer, Janet seems satisfied, and goes to explain herself to Dan. Dan, for his part, seems perplexed at the whole thing. Odd, considering production supposedly talked to him about his behavior. Seeking consolation, Dan talks initially to Missy and Elizabeth, two of the people Janet implicated as having a problem with him, with Elaine and Aaron coming around as well. Dan says that he’s completely dumbfounded at these accusations, and you don’t know how hard I’m resisting making an impeachment joke right now. This leads to Dan confronting Janet about this, who pulls over Missy and Elizabeth to talk with Dan, where Elizabeth, despite being one of the few people to say she didn’t find Dan particularly objectionable, does admit to talking go Janet about it. It becomes clear to Janet that she was being fed something of a story, so our scene ends for now. Rest assured, though, the issue is not done with yet.

We get back to our now usual “Survivor” stuff, in a good, old-fashioned idol hunt by a few of our members. Aaron and Missy agree to go looking for an idol, and so get up to try and avoid the rush. Unfortunately, they pass by an already-awake Janet on their way, and their lame lie of “going for a walk” does not fool her. She tails them, and when that doesn’t work, she just hits on her own. Janet is justly rewarded for her efforts. Good for her.

Janet’s not the only one finding goodies, though. After hearing Karishma complain about how Tommy won’t talk to her (literally the ONLY THING resembling fallout from their move that either he or Lauren gets. Seriously, how are they getting away so unscathed?), we get a comedic moment of a piece of paper dangling in between them without them noticing. Karishma finally spots the paper, only for Jamal to be closer and grab it. He’ll soon wish he hadn’t, though. The show may be handing out advantages like candy on Halloween, but even they’re not that blatant. Jamal’s “advantage”, such as it is, is to go to Island of the Idols, mercifully absent from the merge so far. Even Rob and Sandra’s reactions at Tribal Council are kept to a minimum. Jamal swears to come back with an advantage, only to be told that the thing that looked so much like schmuck bait was indeed schmuck bait. For being so foolish as to grab a possible advantage dangling right in front of him, Jamal has lost his vote at the next Tribal Council. Still, Rob and Sandra offer him a chance to screw over someone else as well. They give him a blank piece of paper and pencil, telling him he can make any fake advantage he wants with it. Sure, a blank piece of paper. That you write a fake advantage on. That will DEFINITELY fool people! I mean, it’s not like there’s a very specific style of writing on advantage notes that would be nearly impossible to forge! Clearly, people will fall for this.

Coming back, Jamal tries to pass it off as a legacy advantage, which he gives to Dean to put a target on the latter’s back. Jamal’s penmanship is nice, but it’s clearly a fake. People entertain the idea it might be real, and keep an eye on Dean, but when even Dan is saying he doesn’t buy it, you’re in trouble.

Our second immunity challenge is a reused concept, but more distinctive than the first. Contestants hold a rope as they’re slowly lowered closer horizontally to the water. Last man and woman standing win immunity. A bit overdone, but it’s been a while since we’ve seen this particular challenge, and any opportunity to have Jeff Probst play the role of torturer is always glorious. I’m less of a fan of the “split gender immunity” thing. I’m ok with it for the first immunity challenge, particularly if you’ve got a large number of people at the merge. But now it just feels cheap and arbitrary. If you’re not going to do it during the first challenge, don’t do it at all.

Our outcome this time is just as uneventful as the first. Missy and Aaron win immunity, though I must say I’m surprised ANYONE fell out before Dan. Dude’s kind of top-heavy. Still, if you though our challenge did nothing, our strategizing does even less. Not even TRYING to pretend the majority is going to break, we instead get mystery in the form of who the target will be. They plan to split votes between Jamal and Karishma, the former due to possibly having an advantage from Island of the Idols, and the latter due to… well, basically for voting the wrong way, and not being Janet or Noura (the latter of whom seems to have been absorbed into the new majority). Kind of random, since I’d say Janet’s the biggest threat, due to being well-liked and uncompromising, but if you must choose between those two, there’s no contest. Jamal is a better strategist, and more likely to pull something crazy. Janet would be the best choice, but if it can’t be her, better Jamal than anyone else.

You would think that the limited amount of strategizing would lead to a long Tribal Council, but this is not so. Not to say that nothing happens, but in terms of time spent, it takes up less time than the first. Our topic of discussion also seems misplaced, as it’s NOW that Dan is put through the wringer for his handsiness. Janet feels the need to justify herself, explains her actions, and gets some feedback from the other women. And it could have been dropped there, but Aaron just has to go put his foot in his mouth, arrogantly saying that he doesn’t believe it because he hadn’t heard it. Jamal rightly points out that Aaron is not entitled to know anything until someone is ready to tell it, nor does it make it any less true. This leads to Dan defending himself, Janet breaking down, and everyone building Janet back up. A good honest discussion we needed to hear, and very emotionally impactful on multiple fronts. Too bad Probst just has to keep talking about how important this conversation is! Look, I largely thing production handled the whole situation well and with much dignity for all involved, but Probst trying to force-feed us the social commentary is really pushing the limits of my patience. I’ll give him credit for at least saying he’s not going to let Dan off the hook just because the man’s getting emotional, but again, Probst, the scene speaks for itself. Sometimes your narration is just too much.

Unsurprisingly, Jamal goes home, though there is some tension. Janet plays her idol. I can’t blame her, since she knows she’s on the outs, and she did receive votes, but in the end, they’re just throwaways. Jamal and Karishma are the main targets, and Jamal is smartly sent home. I will miss the guy, though. For every forced Probst talking point about social commentary, Jamal made it feel natural and comfortable, talking about uncomfortable subjects in a way anyone can understand. Dude might not have been the best player of “Survivor”, but he was and presumably still is a decent and fun human being. For this, I respect him.

Apologies if this blog was less detailed than usual. Not being able to write right after the episode does hamper me a bit in this area. One area where it helps, though, is in giving me time for another…

TOP 5 AND BOTTOM 5!

Yes, it’s time once again to bring out the best and worst “Survivor” has to offer. I don’t often talk about episodes titles as a whole, but they really dropped the ball on this one. As you’ll soon see, it’s bland and generic, despite them having a multitude of good quotes to choose from (I personally would have gone with dan’s cringey “Dope-Ass Merge” comment for hilarity alone). But they didn’t. So, let’s first look at the best titles to herald a merge, and then see where it all went wrong.

TOP 5

5. “I’m not as Dumb as I Look”-Hailing from “Survivor China”, this one may require a little context to understand why it’s so good. On the surface, it’s a pretty generic episode title. Then you remember that this is being said in reference to the infamous, yet hilarious, first fake idol play in the history of “Survivor”. The title may be a bit on the generic side, but anything that reminds one of that deserves a mention on this list.

4. “The Hidden Immunity Idol”-This may raise a few eyebrows to newer fans of the show. After all, and episode talking about hidden immunity idols. Don’t you mean EVERY SINGLE EPISODE OF THE SHOW? Ah, but this title hails from the merge of “Survivor Guatemala”, the first season to introduce this particular twist. Not only would this be a topic of discussion for several episodes to come, thereby making it relevant as a title, but also heralded mystery and excitement. After all, we were seeing this for the first time. We didn’t know what was coming. Thus, by adding excitement and intrigue to an already exciting time in the game, this title accomplishes its most important job.

3. “Girls Gone Wilder”-Look, I’m a sucker for a good pop-cultural reference, and this one works out well. Not only appropriate to the gender theme of “Survivor The Amazon”, it also references Jenna and Heidi’s infamous stripping for chocolate and peanut butter. On a more PC level, it could also refer to the girls going “wild” with power, since not only do they pretty well dominate the game from here on out, but exert their influence on this episode in particular, by insisting Roger go. Maybe a bit sexist in this day and age, but at the time, quite a fitting title.

2. “There’s a New Sheriff in Town”-I like this one for how brazen and yet not brazen it is. This, as you might guess, hails from “Survivor Game Changers”. You know, the season won by officer Sarah Lacina, aka Sheriff Lacina? Obvious in hindsight, but still makes for a decent title on its own. That’s the kind of subtlety I like.

1. “An Emerging Plan”-Out of all the titles on this list, I’d say this is the most subtle. At first seeming like a fairly generic episode title, you glanced over it without much thought. Then you think about it and realize: “An eMERGEing plan”. See, show, if you’re going to work the word “merge” into your merge episode title, do it like this: with a good dose of pun and subterfuge. Not bad for “Survivor Exile Island”.

Honorable Mention: “I’m the Kingpin”-Yet another fairly generic title for a merge, and one that unfortunately has less to justify it. All that puts it on this list is the possible Marvel reference. What can I say? I like Daredevil. Props for playing to your audience, “Survivor Millennials vs. Gen-X”.

BOTTOM 5

5. “Double-Agent”-I may not have as much to say about the titles on this half of the list, mostly because the worst a title can do is be generic, and there’s only so many ways I can say that. “Double-Agent” from “Survivor South Pacific” is no exception to this rule, and so ends up on the list, though I keep it low because, unlike some titles we’ll get to, it’s at least appropriate. After all, this is there episode where Cochran fully jumps ship. It may be overdone, but you can’t say it doesn’t fit.

4. “Play to Win”-What puts the generic merge title from “Survivor Cambodia” on this list is the fact that it’s a lie. Look, the strategic gameplay this season was overall top-notch. It’s my second favorite season for a reason. But the fact remains that this episode was not decided by “Play to Win”, but rather by old grudges coming to light for an easy boot at a large merge. Not saying it’s a good or bad way to play, but call a spade a spade.

3. “Blindside Time”-I really have nothing else to say to this one. It’s generic, more so than the previous two, and what we’ve come to expect at a merge. And for how good the post-merge of “Survivor Caramoan” was, that’s disappointing.

2. “This Game Respects Big Moves”-Yet another thing to blame “Survivor Redemption Island” for: The start of the “BIG MOVEZ!” era. Yes, not only do we have a title that could fit pretty much anywhere, we also have one actively encouraging impulsive and erratic gameplay that stifles individual creativity for the sake of entertainment. Joy. What could possibly be worse than this?

1. “We Made it to the Merge!”-Yes, our most recent season tops the list, though really, it’s a placeholder for all the generic titles just announcing that it’s the merge. We KNOW from the preview that it’s coming. Why not hype us up with what’s special about this one? But no, we just get genericness in a sea of good quotes. It’s not like you didn’t have things to work with this season, CBS. Is a little quality too much to ask?

Honorable Mention-“The Merger”-This one really falls under the number one slot, but I single out for two reasons, one good and one bad. On the good side, this title comes from “Survivor Borneo”, where yeah, they had a reason to be generic. Like what I talked about with “Survivor Guatemala”, even though now it seems old hat, this was a new and exciting development for first-time viewers, making the title not as bad as at first glance. On the bad side, though, this title perpetuates the myth of the “merge” being a “merger”. It is not. Stop calling it that. For this sin, this title must be singled out.

This episode as a whole is unique, if only in the insight it gives us into production. That makes it hard to review, and it does have some annoyances. Parts of the game seemed to go too fast, and I still can’t fathom how we’re supposed to side with Tommy and Lauren when they’re making such bad moves. That said, it was fairly exciting, set up stuff for later, and handled a difficult situation maturely, which is always nice to see. Hope things stay on track, or even improve, in the next episode!

-Matt

Title Credit to Jean Storrs.

Idol Speculation: “Survivor Island of the Idols” Episode 7: Rubbing People the Wrong Way

Forgive me for starting my blog philosophizing about what it takes to win “Survivor”, but as this season, nor the last, had a themed tribe split, I haven’t had a chance to espouse my pet philosophy yet. The person best equipped to win “Survivor” is the person with the best balance. Not in terms of physical balance (though the case of Terry Deitz on “Survivor Exile Island” does make a strong argument for it), but in terms of balance in gameplay style. For instance, on a season like “Survivor David vs. Goliath”, the person who balances the best qualities of a “David” and a “Goliath” within themselves is most likely to win. Now, while this philosophy comes up most prominently on seasons with “vs” themes, it really applies everywhere. Such is the case tonight, where we have a bit of a complexity overload possibly leading to a bad move. Ah, but now I’m getting ahead of myself. Let’s begin at the beginning.

In case you had forgotten about it, Elaine reminds us about her blocking Jason’s vote, and then voting him out last episode. Incidentally, dick move there. I can’t fault the using of the advantage, but still, to vote someone out and not even giving them the chance to vote? Dick move.

Old Vokai have now been blindsided, and feel real fear for the first time in the game. Lauren does not take it well. Let me preface what I’m about to say by saying that Lauren has been playing a solid game thus far, and I will have some praise for her later tonight. But MAN does Lauren not take this well. She gets incredibly emotional, particularly with Missy, whom she seems to have something of a bond with. Now, does Lauren have a right to her feelings? Absolutely. But, as I’ve said before and will say again, you can’t let them out like this, especially in the immediate aftermath of a blindside. best to say “good job”, maybe try and get a bit of information, and move on. Any sort of emotional reaction makes you seem harder to work with, and therefore a target. Luckily for Lauren, Missy’s “Girls Alliance” switch is flipped to “On” this week, and so Missy wants to keep her around to use her as an “in” with the old Vokai. Good strategy on her part, though I wish we got a consistent narrative for what that strategy IS. One week she’s all in with the women, the next she’s saying it was never a thing, the week after, back to the women. I’m not saying don’t be flexible, I’m saying have a narrative throughline, rather than this choppiness.

Lairo may not have the interpersonal turmoil that Vokai currently has, but thing’s aren’t so easy for them either. As happens every so often on “Survivor”, the elements rear their ugly heads, and a torrential downpour hammers the tribe. Karishma complains about the shelter getting them wet, but the more immediate concern is fire, the lack thereof. Jamal volunteers himself to restart it, and from what we see, tries for a while with little success. Jack suggests getting Kellee to do it, since she’s good at fire. Kellee reluctantly agrees, only for Jamal to start telling her how to do it. Kellee diplomatically asks if Jamal wants to keep doing it, hands him back the materials and storms off. She tells us in confessional that Jamal can come off as condescending sometimes, such as in the previous scene. Jack’s diplomacy eventually coaxes her back into the role, and she does make fire, but there’s tension now. Jamal’s annoyance makes for an interesting contrast with Noura’s annoyance. Both are rubbing their tribes the wrong way, but for very different reasons. Noura is a blatant annoyance: Talking too loud, laughing too much, wearing her heart on her sleeve, etc. That said, you always know where you stand with her. In contrast, Jamal is polite and has more social graces, but can grate on you in little ways. Plus, he’s outside the alliance and sneaky. Not that much will come of it tonight, but it’s an interesting contrast.

We sadly don’t have much time to dwell on it, as a boat comes, bidding Janet go to the Island of the Idols. Janet, as mentioned the last time, is somewhat reluctant to go, since it puts a target on her back. This time she has no escape route, though, and so contents herself with putting on an over-the-top “upset” face. I say this because I don’t think someone like Janet has been upset in 20 years.

After a literal jaw-dropping reveal of Boston Rob and Sandra, we get down to brass tacks. Boston Rob talks about “Survivor” being a game of calculated risks, and then my tv spontaneously explodes. Must have been the “Survivor Edge of Extinction” failsafe I put on there after last season. No more of that on my screen, thank you.

Switching to steaming the show on my computer, I must admit this “calculated risks” schpiel seems like a reused one. Isn’t that basically what ALL contests, and Vince’s in particular, have been up to this point? That said, it IS a good lesson for Janet, who earlier had turned down Noura’s idea of a women’s alliance. While I can’t say for certain whether or not the women’s alliance is a good strategy for Janet, I can say her reaction to it is wrong. You ALWAYS show at least a bit of interest in a deal. Keep your options open for down the road. Not that Janet burned her bridge with Noura, but it still seems like a missed opportunity for her.

Back to the game of chance, Boston Rob lays out the stakes. Win and you get what basically amounts to a hidden immunity idol that also prevents you from voting. You go back to camp before the vote. Can’t be voted for, can’t cast a vote yourself. Not the most original twist, but it’s something. As usual, if you lose, you lose your next vote. Janet takes her time to consider, which she should definitely do, though for me this is one of the more clear-cut decisions. There’s very little risk if Janet plays. She’s in a solid majority on a tribe likely to go to Tribal Council next, which doesn’t need her vote to succeed, and if she wins, she basically gets a hidden immunity idol good through the final seven. Not being able to vote kind of sucks, but you know what sucks more? Being voted out, that’s what! Janet, however, is a cautious player, and chooses not to take the risk, citing too much flak if she makes herself immune. Gotta admit, I’m not seeing the logic here, Janet. If you use an advantage, that generally makes you LESS of a target. You’ve effectively revealed your hand, and people won’t be suspicious of what you have. If she’s talking about suspicion of her having something in the first place, well, that just makes even LESS sense, since that’s going to happen to you REGARDLESS just by coming back from “Island of the Idols”. Still, props for giving us something different, and she earns the praise of Sandra, which isn’t nothing.

Kellee is concerned that Janet won’t toe the party line on “Island of the Idols” when she returns, but luckily for her, Janet keeps to the story, and we reaffirm that the tribe as a whole wants Dean gone, spinning Noura as a story to him, and Kellee and Noura having chips on their shoulders about Jamal.

Strategy is not unknown to Vokai, either. It seems Kellee is not the only one a bit creeped out by Dan, as Lauren, Tommy, Missy, and Elizabeth discuss the next day. Evidently Dan needs to take his cue from Emperor Kuzco, and “No Touchee”. Boy, there’s a phrase I never thought I’d say.

With no obvious crack in the old Lairo on their tribe, the old Vokai members, or at least Tommy and Lauren, go for plan B: Make sure it’s not them. I would say “me” but Lauren makes it clear that she and Tommy are a pair. If someone has to go, it should be Dan. After all, he was rubbing people the wrong way (both figuratively and literally in this case), so he’ll be less missed from the old Vokai. Tommy even spins a decent lie he acts out very well, telling most of the old Lairo that Dan talked about voting out Aaron. A decent lie, but if Missy is inconsistent in terms of her overall strategy, she’s very consistent in sniffing out BS. She recognizes the bond that Tommy and Lauren have, correctly conclude that they’re lying, and strategize to get one of the two of them out. She targets Tommy in particular, since she and Lauren have something of a bond despite the blindside (they still seem to pair up, though Lauren admitted that it was going to be hard to trust Missy going forward), and believes that getting rid of Tommy will make Lauren side with her. Given the information she has, I can’t blame her. However, I think Missy underestimates the bond Lauren has with people like Janet and Kellee. It’s understandable, since Missy’s never seen them interact, but I think voting out Tommy would only drive a wedge between Lauren and herself, leading to a Natalie Anderson (“Survivor San Juan del Sur”) situation where Lauren makes it her mission to get revenge for her fallen ally.

On to the challenge which is for… Immunity! Ok, I can understand needing to cut reward challenges for time, but you gave us them in the last two episodes, and now we expect them. Be consistent is all I’m saying! They at least give us a pretty cool challenge for it. Three tribe members toss coconuts into a net, which will knock over a set of puzzle pieces. The remaining four then assembles these into a “Survivor” logo, winning immunity. Not a bad set of elements overall, even if they are reused. Coconut tosses are always fun, and what the puzzle lacks in complexity, it makes up for in scale. Plus, we get Tommy and Jack yelling a lot. Always good for a laugh.

After last episode (both in terms of Lairo actually winning and losing Jason) contests are now going to be much more even overall, and the editing gives us very little. We got viable targets on both tribes pre-challenge. Vokai only got one (Tommy), while Lairo had multiple (Dean, Noura, Jamal), making for good mystery. Funnily enough, we had a situation where both tribes had good reason to try and throw the challenge. We didn’t see it, but it was still a funny concept. I actually thought Missy and Elizabeth, two of the throwers for Vokai, WERE trying to throw the challenge, since their shots went SO wide for athletic people, but since they were drilling shots later, I can only assume they just needed some practice to get in the groove. Vokai gets a lead from Tommy’s shooting, and although they narrowly lose it on the puzzle, they still pull out a narrow victory. Kellee angsts about the use of her idol, as tonight is the last night she can play it, which I’m sure in NO WAY will come into play tonight!

Dean is reaffirmed as the primary target for the night, with Jamal and Jack spinning him a good story about voting for Noura, due to her being, well, Noura. Even Detective Dean can’t see through their poker faces. Kellee, meanwhile, is still down and out about not being able to use her idol, evidently forgetting about the Chrissy Hoffbeck (“Survivor Heroes vs. Healers vs. Hustlers”) school of “Dead Idol as Leverage/Bluff”. Then, though, she has an epiphany! A complicated epiphany! The Rube Goldberg Machine of epiphanies! She wants to keep Dean around, since she has a connection she can use. Fair enough. She wants her idol not to go to waste. Still fair, though again, an idol CAN be of use even if you don’t play it. She wants to give Dean her idol so he can save himself, and here’s where things start to get finicky. I agree with her argument that it’s best for her game if Jack or Jamal go. Both worked against her interest in the past, and could be dangerous come a merge. Plus, since Dean has nowhere to go, he’s not much of a threat. But I fail to see how giving Dean your idol is necessary. True, it ensure Dean will be forever loyal to you (as much as one can on “Survivor”), but just letting him in on a plan to not vote him out will do that! It’s not like the guy has anywhere else to go! All his allies are gone! Now what, you may ask, is the harm of letting Dean play the idol? After all, it gets to the same result in the end. The trouble, though, it that it increases risk for Kellee (as she herself mentions, Dean could use this against her), but she either has to publicly play her idol for Dean, or let him steal a moment that should be for her. She doesn’t know the jury will start tonight (it will), but if she’s suspecting a merge, like she tells us, then most people here will be on the jury, and will see this great move of her. Unless, of course, it just looks like Dean found the idol on his own, in which case he gets all the credit for saving himself. To add onto the complexity pile, Kellee wants to let Noura in on the plan, and have her vote for either Jack or Jamal. Now we’re back in good idea territory, but again, we didn’t necessarily need to go here. True, Jack and Jamal will never go along with the plan, and Janet’s made it pretty clear she’s not moving, but the fact remains that we’re never shown why Kellee can’t keep her idol (or play it on herself, just to be safe), and go to Karishma, Dean, and Noura, and rally them to vote out Jack or Jamal 4-3. You could argue that this move would piss off the remaining two left out, but either Jack or Jamal would be pissed anyway, and all you have to do is let Janet know, and she’ll be at least slightly less miffed. Kellee doesn’t know that Jamal has an idol, so she can’t know that this is the risk.

Point being, I think Kellee got a little too caught up in her idea, and made it overly complex. Is it the worst thing in the world? No, but I think it got a little too cute, and ran more risk than she needed, as outlined above. Not the end of the world for her tonight, but could be a problem long term. Simple plans are simply foiled, but plans that are too complex lead to a lot of unnecessary risk. Like most things on “Survivor”, you need to balance simplicity and complexity in your plans. Complex enough to not be easily foiled, but simple enough to avoid unnecessary risk.

Since we see Kellee telling Dean about her idol, it’s pretty clear that either Jamal or Jack is going home. Yes, it kills the mystery a bit, but this is another good example of a “journey” episode, rather than a “destination” episode. We don’t need mystery if there’s a fun story getting there, and damn if this isn’t fun. Plus the mystery of who was going to Tribal Council, plus the mystery between Jack and Jamal keeps that element going. As to who she should go with, Kellee lines out her choices better than I could. Jack is a threat come the merge, but Jamal is less likely to work with her. Both compelling arguments, but for me, Jamal is the correct choice here. Leaving aside his idol (as Kellee can’t possibly know about it), while Jack is a threat come the merge, you don’t know for certain that the merge is coming, and Jack’s a bigger target than you if it is. Plus, Jack’s shown that he takes betrayal WAY better than Jamal. You want as many options as possible, and Jack could still be willing to work with you, even if you do betray him. Betray Jamal, however, and that bridge is burned pretty much for good.

Even Tribal Council has a bit of complexity addiction tonight. Dean, of course, plays up his moroseness, but Noura decides she needs to add on to it. She starts off well, talking about long term trust versus short term trust, indicating that not knowing Dean for as long makes him a target by gesturing in his direction. She also gestures towards Jamal as someone she doesn’t get along with, but Jamal takes it in stride. Then, however, she has to get complex with it. She goes on some extended metaphor about family, talking about working with and against the jerks in the family, and now Jamal is suspicious. He requests that Probst question Noura on trying to target him, which Probst obliges, hilariously mimicking Jamal’s gestures as he does so. Jamal then invokes the dreaded “Women’s Alliance”, getting Kellee into the action, who calls the accusation “arbitrary” and “sexist”. She does have a point when she says it’s brought up as a threat more often than it’s actually a problem, but in Jamal’s defense, we’re still reeling from “Survivor Micronesia”. This segways into a nice, honest discussion about how the perception of women in society is changing, and how that impacts the game. It’s a thoughtful and engaging discussion, ruined by Probst talking about how “relevant” it makes “Survivor”. Look, Probst, I love you, but this is a step too far. DOING something makes it relevant. TALKING about how relevant it is makes it seem like pandering, and less relevant pandering at that. We didn’t need you to tell us it was relevant. We already knew. Remember that first episode, with me talking about how “Less is More”? Yeah, that’s something that’s still relevant as well.

We sadly don’t get the epic music to plays us out of Tribal Council, but we do get the expected Dean idol play. This has Jamal spooked, and so he plays his idol. Props to him for paying attention, but less props for playing it on Noura. With all that talk of people being out to get you, seems to me the smart thing would have been to play it on himself. I’d be wrong, however, as Jack is targeted for being a threat. Not the move I expected, and not the one I think is the smartest. That said, while losing any of the targets tonight would have been a hard blow, I do think Jack is at least the least interesting of the three. Jamal is a complex character who brings a lot of drama, and Dean at least has the “Detective Dean” persona to lean back on. Jack, while a nice guy and intelligent, brought little to the table. He’s sort of a less athletic Joe Anglim (“Survivor Worlds Apart”). A nice, inoffensive guy who brings little else to the table.

After a few rocky episodes, this show is back in gear! This episode not only built on past storylines, but set the stage for new ones as well, what with the Missy/Lauren and Dean/Kellee bonds. Plus, some people noticed that Dean played his idol tonight rather than the previous Tribal Council. Will this overly complex plan bite Kellee in the butt? I don’t know, but I can’t wait to find out in the merge next week!

I wonder if CBS will compensate me for a new tv…

-Matt

Title Credit to Jean Storrs.